Two voices in a dimly lit room. Both female. One is high pitched,
cultured, and ever so slighty maniacal. "What do you mean you have him
wrapped around your finger? He doesn't love you like he does me!"
The reply comes calmly from a voice that is always calm. Always
rational. "I can make him do anything. Anything at all. He's my little
puppet. My toy. My cash cow. I don't need to be engaged to him. Money
and fear run thicker than love, anyway. You can bet on that."
"You really believe that? Well, I can agree with the fear part, but
money is so...pedestrian. There's always more where it came from." A
rattling noise, perhaps that of a teacup.
"Then put your money where your mouth is. I propose a bet. To
prove which one of us can get him to do what they want better than the
other." For a moment, both voices are silent.
"I accept. Your foolish boasts are as empty as your love life."
Silence. The voice of reason turns cold. "It comes down now to
setting the conditions of our bet. And the prize to be won..."
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The Sting
by John Biles
Sequel to The Kiss.
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A Ranma 1/2 Fanfiction
Based on the Anime and manga by Rumiko Takahashi.
Akane blinked at Ranma in the backyard. "Ranma, why are you wearing
one of my bikinis?" Ranma was, in fact, in onna-Ranma mode, dressed up in
a nice blue bikini that was just right on Akane, but a little small on a
now blushing Ranma.
Ranma-chan sighed and rolled over onto her back. She was lying on
a towel in the backyard with her history book next to her, open for
reading. "I lost a bet with Nabiki and now I have to wear this all day
long."
"All day long? You didn't wear it at breakfast." Akane rolled her
eyes. He hadn't even asked before borrowing it, either.
"Yeah, well, I only found out I lost afterwards. I'm just glad we
don't have school today or I'd die of embarrassment."
"What was the bet?" Akane asked. I wonder if he'll ever have the
sense to stop falling into Nabiki's snares. She's probably lurking
somewhere getting ready to take photos of him. A bush rustled. Akane
contemplated tossing a rock into it, then decided not to. Nabiki wasn't
used to physical punishment the way everyone else was. This would
require subtlety.
"I'd rather not say." Ranma-chan blushed slightly and rolled over
on one side, stretching a bit.
Spying the nearby garden hose, Akane smiled a bit. A clever idea
came to mind. "I'll be right back." I'm really sick and tired of Nabiki
taking all those pictures of me without asking. Here's where I get even.
Ranma-chan rolled over onto her chest, propping her torso up with
her arms, hands under her chin. Stupid history book. Who cares about
the Meiji restoration, anyway? Nevertheless, she soon sunk her attention
into the book.
After a few minutes, she heard footsteps and looked up. It was
Akane in a yellow bikini. Somewhere nearby, there was a faint noise,
perhaps the sound of someone changing rolls of film. Akane stretched,
her arms behind her head.
"I..uh...going to...ah...sunbathe, Akane?" Ranma-chan said. She
stared as Akane struck several rather seductive-looking poses, although
they weren't directed towards Ranma, or anyone else for that matter. She
might have just been stretching, Ranma-chan thought. Surely she's not
coming on to me.
Akane smiled wickedly and Ranma-chan flinched ever so slightly.
"Why, yes, Ranma. Among other things." Ranma-chan blinked.
"You're not going to...ahh...Umm..." Ranma-chan stammered as Akane
laid out a towel and laid down on it, stretching and wiggling a bit.
"Feels so good." Akane gave a satisfied little sigh.
"Wha...what feels so good?" Ranma-chan began wondering if the Akane
she knew had been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a body double.
She looked Akane up and down. The yellow bikini was about as modest as
bikinis get, but it showed her off to good advantage. Too bad she can't
swim, Ranma-chan thought. She does look kinda cute in that. Not as
tomboy-like as usual.
Akane rolled over. "Hmm. I think I need some suntan lotion." She
pointed over to the bottle of lotion lying by Ranma-chan's elbow. "Can
you put some on me?"
Ranma-chan blinked, staring at the bottle, then at Akane.
"Hello, earth to Ranma. Come in, Ranma."
"You want me...to put suntan lotion on you?"
"On my back." Akane smirked faintly. "Or are you not brave enough?"
"Brave enough?" Ranma-chan said, her ire rising. "Whaddya mean not
brave enough? I'm certainly not afraid of you!"
"Then do it!" Akane's eyes flashed. Ranma-chan sighed slightly.
Putting some lotion on Akane's back, she started to rub the lotion
into Akane's back with the tips of her fingers.
Akane made faint purring sounds and Ranma-chan froze up. "Akane?"
"Come on, Ranma. It doesn't take a million years to put suntan
lotion on someone."
"You were...purring."
"I was not!" Akane smiled as she heard more clicks from the bush.
Her hand quietly snaked over to the hose as Ranma-chan tentatively began
to do her back again. Before she was quite ready, Ranma-chan was done.
She would need another distraction. Hmm.
"Here's the bottle, Akane. So you can...uh, do your arms and stuff."
"Are you sure you don't want to do them, Ranma?"
Ranma-chan dropped the bottle like it was poison and bolted
backwards. "Akane? Uh...I..." She must have gone mad, yes, that was it.
Akane advanced on her like a prowling lion. "I feel so close to
you, what with you wearing my clothing and all."
Did she really have the garden hose in one hand? Ranma-chan started
making feeble warding gestures. "I should have asked, I know, I'm
sorry, what are you..."
Akane suddenly reared up in front of Ranma-chan, took aim and hosed
down one of the nearby bushes. A cry of "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"
erupted from the bush, and a sodden thump.
Ranma-chan leaped to her feet. "What the?"
Nabiki crawled out of the bush, dripping wet, carrying a camera,
also dripping wet. "Uh, hi."
Akane laughed. "Hah! Serves you right for taking pictures without
asking!"
"Kunou's going to be really disappointed." Nabiki said. Good thing
I finished the first roll before Akane caught on. Guess she's getting
smarter.
Ranma-chan laughed, though not as loudly as Akane. "Good thing
you're not cursed, Nabiki. Guess I know now why you wanted me to wear
this bikini."
"Well, you're gonna have to do something else then, since you ruined
the point of this exercise."
"What?"
"This camera is water-proof, you see. And that picture of you
putting the sun tan lotion on Akane's back. Well, it would be a tragedy
if certain people saw that. They might...take it the wrong way."
Akane blinked. "What? Water-proof?"
"Prove it." Ranma-chan said, staring at Nabiki.
"You really want me to prove it?"
"What's it gonna take, Nabiki?" Akane said.
"Well, I owe someone a favor, so you're gonna have to pay it off for
me, Ranma. And I can find something for you too, Akane." Nabiki
smiled. This is going just as we planned it.
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"Here's your ramen, sir." Ranma-chan dropped five bowls of ramen
onto the table in front of each of the five customers. She sighed.
"Hurry up, son-in-law. We've got plenty more customers for you to
serve." Cologne smiled behind the cash register. With Shampoo sick,
having Ranma pitching in was quite helpful. She owed Nabiki a few free
meals now, but Ranma's girl form always pleased the customers, and happy
customers ate more.
Ranma-chan looked up at the clock. Only two more hours. Bleah.
The door chime rang and Ranma-chan glanced over. Kodachi, dressed in a
kimono, strode in. "Is Ranma-sama here? I heard he was working here.
I've come to take him away from all of this."
"Uh, hi, Kodachi. I'm working." Keeping an eye on Kodachi,
Ranma-chan went about her business delivering ramen to tables and getting
some very nice tips. This girl-form does have some advantages.
"I'm not talking to you, peasant dog!" Kodachi ignored Ranma and
began a whispered conversation with Cologne. Soon, Kodachi glared over at
Ranma-chan, then stormed out.
"What was that about, old bat?" Ranma-chan asked as she came over
to pick up another order.
"She came to see you, but she still does not seem to understand that
your curse exists." Cologne smiled faintly. "She muttered something
about it being very important to find you and stormed out."
"It'll wait."
"I told her you'd be here in two hours. She'll be back then."
"Whaddya do that for? I don't want to see Kodachi!"
Cologne shrugged. "Shampoo is too sick to see you, but Kodachi is
paying very handsomely for news of your whereabouts. There is no point
in keeping you here, so..."
"You sold me down the river! AARGH!"
"I made no promises of your behavior. Now take these twelve bowls
to table 6." Cologne stacked bowls of ramen all over Ranma-chan, who sighed.
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Two hours later, Ranma-chan was finally free. She finished changing
into her usual clothing, and stepped out of the Nekohanten bathroom, only
to be greeted by a hot water dousing.
"OWWWWW!!!!" Ranma shook. Well, at least I don't have to stay a
girl until I get home. Cologne smiled up at him.
"Kodachi is here to see you."
Ranma sighed. No escape. He stepped out into the restaurant, where
Kodachi was waiting in a kimono. She latched onto his arm. "Hello,
Ranma-sama. Would you like to go on a date with me?"
"I...uh...I sort of...umm...." Ranma nervously hemmed and hawed.
Kodachi half-walked, half-dragged Ranma outside. "We could catch a
movie and have a nice home-cooked dinner at my mansion."
Ranma lied. "I don't have any money."
"You just finished working!"
Honesty this time. "Nabiki blackmailed me into working for Cologne
for four hours with no pay."
"Well, I have plenty of money, Ranma-sama. It will be just the two
of us." Kodachi snuggled a little closer to Ranma, who tried and failed
to put some distance between them.
"I...uh...I mean...I...well, I..."
"You can even pick the movie."
"I'm kind of busy...I mean I...uh..." By now they were out on the
street.
"Well, do you like my new perfume?" Kodachi dabbed some perfume on
her hand and held it up for Ranma to smell.
"It's very nice." It actually was very pleasant, though strangely
familiar. "I can't quite recognize it."
"It's a more pleasant smelling form of my paralysis gas." Ranma
felt his muscles locking up.
"ACK!" He started to run, then fell down, unable to move.
"This will be a lovely date!"
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"Misery" was the movie, and misery was what Ranma was
experiencing. Kodachi, on the other hand, was having the time of her
life. "This is such a wonderful movie, Ranma-sama! What a clever woman
she is!"
Ranma sat quietly and stared at the screen, feeling a great deal of
empathy for the poor captive. At least he could wiggle his toes, for
what little entertainment value that was worth. The movie dragged on and
on, giving Ranma a true sense of the meaning of the word misery. Slowly,
the life began to come back into his limbs. Better to remain still so
she doesn't realize it, though.
A hand tapped him on the shoulder. It was Nabiki, dressed up in a
trenchcoat and sunglasses. She whispered, "I know you want out of
here. Blink once for yes, twice for no."
With a mighty effort, Ranma blinked once. Nabiki smiled. "You'll
owe me another favor if I get you out..."
Ranma blinked once. Kodachi looked around. "Do you hear something,
Ranma-sama?" He just sat there. "Is something...oh yes, you can't talk
like that. Hmm." She held a bottle of salts under his nose. Soon his
lips could move. "Much better. Talking to myself is fun, but dates are
meant for witty conversation. Don't you think so, Ranma-sama?"
"Of course." If only I could move!
Kodachi said, "Would you like me to get you some snacks?"
"Yes!" At least I won't be hungry. Ranma would have settled back
in his chair. If he could move.
"Don't go anywhere! HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!" Kodachi bounced off to the
concession stand.
Ranma rolled his eyes. Not unless I fall out of this chair.
Nabiki smiled. "Time for us to get you out of here."
With what, a crane? Ranma wondered how Nabiki was gonna get him
out. Pick him up and carry him?
Nabiki nodded to two other trenchcoated figures. Hiroshi and
Daisuke stood up, hefted Ranma and ran. "You owe us one, Ranma."
Ranma would have nodded if he could move. And he owed Nabiki one,
again. Oh boy...
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Hiroshi and Daisuke put Ranma down on the park bench and Nabiki held
a small bottle of a scented perfume under his nose. Soon, Ranma felt his
strength flowing back into his body. He sat up and stretched.
"I feel like a zombie. Thanks, Nabiki. I owe you one."
Nabiki smiled oh-so-sweetly. "I know. And I plan to collect."
Ranma groaned. "How soon?"
"Immediately."
Hiroshi and Daisuke laughed. "You did write her a blank check, ya
know, Ranma." Daisuke said. "How broke is he gonna be?"
"Hmm. I think you should take me out on a date for your repayment,
Ranma. It all depends on how cheap you are...as to how much it will cost
you." Nabiki smiled and slinked over to Ranma. "I expect a movie, and
dinner."
Ranma grumbled, "But I don't have enough money..."
Nabiki laughed. "I'll loan you the money, then you can pay me back."
Ranma pounded his head against the park bench while Daisuke and
Hiroshi laughed. Nabiki paid them off for their assistance, then she
took Ranma by the arm. "Ready to go, Ranma?"
"Ready as I ever am." I wonder how many of my fiancees will show up
and clobber me tonight...
***********************************************************************
The date was actually going much better than Ranma expected. They
had made it through another movie without any attacks, taken a walk in
the park without Ranma getting wet or attacked, and were now waiting to
be seated at a nice restaurant. Of course, Ranma was about to go broke,
but that was at least not physically painful.
With a little luck, Kodachi wouldn't find them before the date was
over. Ranma and Nabiki got a table with no problems, ordered their food,
and it even arrived safely, without interruption.
Ranma poked at his food, looking everywhere between bites. There
was no way the universe would let him actually finish this meal in
peace. Something awful had to happen. Where was everyone?
***********************************************************************
Cologne frowned. Someone had sabotaged the sprinklers so they
wouldn't stop going off, and turned off the hot water heater...Not only
had all the customers been chased off, Shampoo and Mousse couldn't stay
human long enough to help clean up the mess. Shampoo had been feeling
much better, well enough to go looking for Ranma, too...But not until
this disaster was over and done with.
***********************************************************************
Ukyou closed the door as the last customer left. With the
Nekohanten apparently flooded, she'd had so much business that she'd had
to stay open three extra hours to feed them all. No time to go see how
Ranchan was doing. Oh well, this will give me more money to spend on
Ranchan, she thought, and on that new spatula I've been wanting...
***********************************************************************
By the time they left the restaurant, the stress was really getting
to Ranma. He kept seeing Kodachi and Kunou behind every bush. How could
a date possibly be this peaceful? Shouldn't Ryouga show up and attack
him or something?
***********************************************************************
Ryouga sat at the base of the Colonel Chicken statue. He clutched
the note in his hand fervently, reading it again. It said, "Dear
Ryouga. Please meet me at Colonel Chicken for dinner tonight. Please
wait for me, I might be late. Your friend, Akane." Akane wants to eat
dinner with me! I am so happy!
He was so happy he didn't even notice he was at the Minjaku Colonel
Chicken on Hokkaido...
***********************************************************************
Akane sat at the base of the Colonel Chicken statue. She clutched
the note in her hand, reading it again. It said, "Dear Akane. Please meet
me at Colonel Chicken for dinner tonight. Please wait for me, I might
be late. Your friend, Ryouga." I should have known better than to expect
him to show up...but getting out of the house is nice every once in a
while. Guess this is going to be a long night....
***********************************************************************
Nabiki looked over at Ranma, who was starting to twitch. "Are you
okay, Ranma? You look sick. Too much food?"
"Where is everyone?"
"I decided we needed a little peace and quiet. So I made a few
arrangements. I don't like being attacked while I'm eating." Nabiki
smiled. Nabiki's watch alarm went off. "Ahh, very good."
"What's the alarm?"
"I just won 30,000 yen from Kodachi. Assuming she pays up,
anyway." Soon they had almost reached the dojo. "She should be lurking
around here somewhere..."
Kodachi dropped down off a nearby roof. "Get away from Ranma-sama!"
Nabiki did so. "As you wish. Where's my money?"
Kodachi grimaced at Nabiki. "What money?"
"From our little bet. I think we can both conclude I got Ranma to
do a lot more for me today than you did."
"He took me on a date!"
"He took me on a date, and posed for pictures, and worked for
Cologne for four hours at my suggestion." Nabiki smiled. "And he didn't
even finish his date with you."
"Because you kidnapped him, isn't that right, Ranma-sama?" Kodachi
turned to Ranma expectantly.
"Uhhh....No, I don't think you could say that." Ranma nervously
hemmed and hawwed.
Nabiki sighed. Somebody give this boy a backbone. "Admit it,
Kodachi. You lost."
"I never lose! You cheated!"
"And you didn't?"
"Silence, peasant dog! I never cheat except as is rightfully mine
to do so!"
"So you're not going to pay up?"
"Not to you."
Nabiki nodded. "Guess I'll have to mail Asuka the tape I made of
our bet and of my date with Ranma here...With an appropriate voice over
of course."
"You wouldn't! You wouldn't dare!"
Ranma laughed. "I take it you don't know Nabiki very well...I'm
sure Asuka would pay her more for that video than the value of your
bet...Wait...what was this bet anyway?"
"Want me to mail this tape to all your fiancees, Ranma? I'm sure
they'd love to see it too."
Ranma frowned. "Thanks, I'll pass...Wait, who's filming this, anyway?"
Nabiki pointed a ways back to where Daisuke and Hiroshi were
standing with a pair of camcorders. "They've been following us the whole
time. Luckily for me, they work cheap."
Daisuke and Hiroshi waved. Kodachi looked at them. "Then if I
neutralize them..."
Ranma sighed. Here we go again...
Kodachi sprang off after the hapless cameramen and Ranma chased
after her...We all can guess what happens next.
***********************************************************************
Nabiki dragged Ranma upstairs to his bedroom. He plopped down
exhausted on his futon. "Oy...the pain. That's why I hate dating. Why
I really, really hate dating. I've never had a date that didn't end with
a brawl." He took a deep breath and relaxed.
Nabiki dug through his closet and tossed him some pajamas. "Here,
put these on."
"Not with you watching!" For a moment Ranma wondered if Nabiki
would actually leave. She did. He sighed and quickly changed into his
pajamas, then did some stretches to relieve his tension.
Soon the door opened again. It was Nabiki with a half empty plate
of cookies and some glasses of tea. "Kasumi gave me this to give you.
She thought it might make you feel better."
Ranma began munching out. He did indeed feel better with some
snacks in his system. Nabiki plopped down beside him and had a few
cookies herself, then started counting out money into two equal stacks.
Ranma watched as the stacks grew to a remarkable size. He wondered
how she could even get that much money into her wallet. Finally, she
shoved over the left stack to him. "20,000 yen for you. 20,000 yen for me."
Ranma blinked. "Where...how...Amazing."
Nabiki smiled. "You'll get your cut of the revenue from the pictures
once I actually have time to develop and sell them."
"What about Akane's share for the ones of her?"
"That goes into keeping this house running...With the amount of
furniture she breaks over your head, she might break even by the time
she's eighty...Maybe." Nabiki slipped her share back into her wallet.
"You did really well today, Ranma. I don't think anyone will ever know
we planned all of this in advance."
"Well, some of it...I sure didn't plan to get paralyzed in a movie
theatre with Kodachi..." Ranma tried to stuff his money into his wallet,
which went into shock, since it had never seen so much cash.
"Now you can buy Akane that birthday present she's been wanting,
too." Nabiki smiled as Ranma started.
"How did you know I was planning to..." Ranma began.
Nabiki smiled again. "You're still transparent as glass, Ranma. I
knew that was why you suggested this scheme from the start. Still, I'm
glad you suggested it."
"Why?" Ranma said. How had she known what he planned to do with
the money?
Nabiki contemplated telling Ranma the real reason, then decided this
wasn't the right time or place, so she'd settle for something equally
true...but less potentially dangerous. "Because it shows you're getting
smarter. Because I stood to make a profit...Because...you trusted me not
to cheat you. I know everyone doesn't trust me very much...I guess
they've got good reason. When you're working with a partner, trust is
vital. If you can't trust each other, it just won't work out. I...thank
you, Ranma."
Ranma blushed slightly. "Well, I mean...you're the only person I
know smart enough to pull off your end of it...and everything, and I...uh..."
Nabiki cleaned up the remains of the food and drink. "You don't
have to say anything, Ranma." She leaned over and pecked Ranma on the
cheek. "And that's for being a good sport and not asking for all the
money back that you spent on the date. I had fun...maybe next time we
can go dancing..." She picked up the tray and headed for the door.
Ranma stared as she left. "N..Next time?"
"I'd like to hope this can be a continuing partnership. Not to
mention you've got another big occasion coming up soon you're gonna need
money for..." She paused in the doorway. "Or have you forgotten that?"
"Wh..What?" Ranma stared at Nabiki, trying to read her mind.
"I'll tell you for 500 yen."
"AAARGH!!!!" Ranma pulled on his pig-tail in a fit of pique.
"Take a look at the calendar, Ranma."
He took a look. His dad's birthday was in two weeks. "Oh...that.
Maybe I'll give him a tire to play with..."
Nabiki and Ranma both laughed.
*************************************************************************
Downstairs, Kasumi finally finished cleaning up the kitchen. "When
will Nabiki ever learn to clean up after she bakes cookies?" Kasumi
muttered to herself, then blinked. "Nabiki made cookies? Wait...that
never happens...I guess it must have been a special occasion. Oh my."
John Walter Biles : MA-History, Ph.D Wannabe at U. Kansas
ranma@falcon.cc.ukans.edu http://falcon.cc.ukans.edu/~ranma/falcon.html
http://www.dhp.com/~wraven/john/index.html
"He's a try hard homie... those idiots who hang around wearing baggy pants
and have hats on the top of their heads (not *on* their heads) who just
go 'Yo, man' all the time, hanging around in groups. Bleh."--Caroline
Seawright, speaking of an obnoxious person.