Well, I got really bored so I figured, why not try and write something!!
Thought I'd post the miserable results ^_^ Anyhow, I was weired out when
I wrote it..the spelling and stuff isnt perfect and when I put it into my
account it got messed up-- i tried to fix it as much as i could ^_^
let me know what you think- the writing stlye is too wordy I'll admit :P
*The Normalicy Factor*
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"Ranma no baka!!!" The screams echoe across the dusk afternoon in Nermia.
Be it noted, the Nermia ward has sound properties that are famous across the
universe... A shout can reach another major character miles away. Akane's voice
is an added bonus to
this- Ranma once said "You can hear a walrus like that bellow across all of
Japa--OW!" And on a clear day (or when the plot requires it) One can almost
taste the yells of "Pig Tailed Girl! I lo--OOF!" and " Ranma take Shampoo
on date!!!" Akane chasing Ranma is about as regular as the sun that
rises in the morning.
Akane had passed by the Nekohanten on her morning run earlier. The
Nekohaten is not noted for it's not serving Pan Galactic Gargle
Blasters. Nope, they just serve Ramen. Working at the Cat Cafe, you see
three main people. All are named after common household bathroom items
(At least on worlds where there are bathrooms- some
have showerooms instead) Mousse is a fellow in white robes and long
black hair. He wears glasses that are the roughly size of millstones,
and they let him see about as well as a brick. Do bricks see? Well.. If
walls could talk we'd know. Some people say
walls do talk, but only those soft fluffy bouncy walls. Also in the Cat
Cafe, Cologne. have you ever noticed how short the old people tend to
be? (No, the staff doesn't count) Cologne's exact age is somewhat of a
mystery, although some place her in late
Triassic, early Jurrasic. One fellow went as far as to claim she was was
from the Pleistocene. His broken body turned up on the beach a few days
later... Also living/working at the Cat
Cafe is Shampoo, a blue haired girl of the Amazon tribe. The same afore
mentioned fellow also theorized that if Shampoo's body was the only
thing keeping her head from floating into orbit. (Makes ya wonder, don't
it?) The Cat cafe's least prominent non-point is that George Washington
did not sleep there. For that matter,
neither has anyone notable. This is not noted in the Nekohanten's non existant history book.
Nearby is Ucchans, an Okonamiyaki store-- they sell okonomiyaki. The
best thing you can order at the Ucchan is oknomiyaki. (Are you really
surprised?) The owner is Ukyou Kunoji, who at times dresses as a
different gender. Courting her is Tsubasa Kenurai, who also dresses as
the opposite sex. He tends to also imitate inatimate objects. Did it
occur to you that this fanfic might actually be Tsubasa?
***
The prime difference between the world of Nermia and the world of what
we call "real life" is an obscure working known as the Normalicy
Factor.. What separates in part Otaku away from non-Otaku. the non
understanding of what is considered a "freakish" Obsession-- But what
would happen if that factor were changed? An alteration to either of the
two worlds... It's impossible to say the exact effects. There are the
laws of science here that do not apply to Anime, and the laws of Anime
that do not apply to
science. For example... The law of gravity. In Anime, gravity is
lessened when Ranma flies into the air after one of Akane's kicks. No
human in the real world could live through the low earth orbit
conditions Happosai has come through. In this world, when
something is desroyed its destroyed. The Dominion Tank Police would've
demolished Newport city by now. The so called "Normalicy Factor" controls this.
***
Skuld looked up from her complicated equations.. She had a face on that
was a mixture of horror and amazement... Laying strewn about were all
kinds of mecha and their parts.. In the middle of the floor sat Skuld,
one lock of her hair reaching for the heavens.
"This has to be a bug..."
***
Otaku are sometimes more like the anime they worship than human.. A
sort of inbetween world.. Where as normal people wouldnt form love
triangles, or use mallets on one another (Not regularly, anyways) Otaku
sometimes do when in large groups. One example
of this is #Ranma!, where anime fans are in an enviroment with no
physical restrictions... And as suspected, Chaos and anime-like stuff
was fairly common... Otaku, a bridge between the worlds... The so called
"Otaku Bridge" lay dormant for years, but it had a greater power... a
trigger. Somehow, in the course of both world's histories, A
scientist/madman created this link. The exact properties and situation
aren't known.
***
In a house somewhere in the California area, a shocked silence filled
the room. the parents looked on in wonder as their son examined his
head.. No, There was no cut, nor any blood. Han had tipped back in his
chair and hit his head on a desk corner.. But there had been a cut,
where did it go? The poor fellow just wasn't used to his injuries
playing hide and seek. Han, a fan of Urusei Yatsura and Maison Ikkoku,
shrugged and went back to watching the infamous disco episode. His
parents decided to faint instead.
***
Lum stared at Darling (Ataru) as he lay in the burn ward of Tomobiki
Hospital. "Darling never was hurt by my shocks before!" Ataru yelled as
a male nurse applied bandages, but leaped for a female nurse entering
the room. "HEY BABE! Wanna see my scars??"
***
On the bridge of the Starship Enterprise, Commander William Riker bent
down to look at what was now in the captain's chair. It was an angry
looking small, wet, black pig with Captain's insignia pinned to it's
striped bandanna. Nearby, Commander Worf stood with a now empty glass of
water. "Mr. Worf, what happened here?" Inquired Riker. "Well, sir, I
asked the replicator for a cup of Earl Grey tea, but it gave me a cup of
cold water. I came to report this to the captain and, well.." "Well
what?" "We hit a
speed bump." Commander Riker gave Worf a look that said plainly he
didn't beleive it."The Enterprise doen't hit speed bumps!" "Would you
beleive air turbulence then?"
Out of the blue,(Well, there was no blue, but who cares?) Dr. Crusher
skated on to the brige and yelled "JEAN LUC!!!!" trying to grab up the
cute piggy.. Only to have that so not-cute Dianna Troy flatten Picard
with a mallet, squashing the cute little Jean Luc into the imitation
corinthian leather of the captain's chair.
***
Ranma, Genma, and the Tendos sat around the TV. Nothing interesting
happened. Ranma looked around cautiously, as if expecting Kodachi,
Ukyou, or Shampoo to show up at any moment. Outside, a thud was heard.
"Aha! It's about time, I was bored as hell..." Ranma thought as he bolted
to the door...he waited.... then he looked outside. Sitting on the
ground was Shampoo, rubbing her face. "Nihao Ranma!" she said as she
glomped onto him. The weight of the glomp pulled Ranma right over and he
tumbled onto the ground. "Shampoo no understand, she walk right into
wall!" "Why? Couldn't you find the door?" "No, no! Shampoo surprised
wall not become door when she walk into it! It be mean wall and hit her
in face! I KILL!" Shampoo ran for the wall, with Bonnoburi in attack
position. One of the bonnoburi looked lopsided... Shampoo stopped and
blew it back up. (See? they really are beach balls on sticks!!!) Then
she charged the wall again, only to end up going through the window as
Kasumi opened it. "AYAAA!" *Crash*
(End part one)
Well, I tried!
____________________________
[ Nabiki@viper.nauticom.net ]
[ M.Miner ]
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Long live the church of SD!!!!!!!