A good beginning. Occasionally, there was too much description,
obstructing the flow of the story. However, the story itself was good.
Try not to reveal any more about this Omu character...let him remain
mysterious...at least until near the end. I applaud you on the
intensity of the battle scenes. The urgency of the battle was brought
home.
Sorry if my comments are a little out of focus. I have other things on
my mind right now. Keep up the good work.
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Nightelf - nwl9354@tam2000.tamu.edu
"Open up your mind, let your fantasies unwind..."
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