and here's the second half...
**************************************************************************
"Akane, come here a minute. There's something I think you ought to
see," Nabiki said. Akane followed her downstairs to see Ranma sitting with
Kodachi. Her temper was just starting to boil over when she heard Ranma
say he cared for her. Suddenly, her knees turned to rubber and she sat
abruptly on the stairs, stunned.
"I know it's hard to believe, but it's true. I care about Akane.
I'm sorry, Kodachi," Ranma was saying.
"Goodbye, Ranma," Kodachi said, getting up and stalking out.
"Ranma," Akane said, walking into the room where Ranma was watching
Kodachi leave with a rising sense of dread.
"A-Akane! How long have you been here?"
"Long enough."
"Akane, I can explain..."
"Ranma, let me say this first," Akane interrupted, then took a deep
breath to steady herself. "I care for you, too, Ranma. I was just too
scared to be the first to say it."
Genma and Soun came bounding in, shouting for joy and hugging their
offspring. "Ranma, I'm proud of you son," Genma said as he enveloped his
son in a big bear hug. "Akane, you have made me so happy," Soun sobbed.
"But...but" Ranma tried, but everybody else was talking at the same time.
"Congratulations, Akane," Nabiki said. "I knew you had it in you.
You have my full support, you know."
"Oh, Nabiki!" Akane cried and hugged her sister, grateful for the
first time for her sister's scheming talents. "Akane, I'm so happy for
you," Kasumi said as she joined in the hug.
"But...but I..." Ranma stuttered.
***************************************************************************
Genma and Soun were starting to plan a party when Nabiki left. She
found Kodachi in the garden plotting revenge.
"Kodachi, let's talk," Nabiki said.
"Aren't you the sister of Akane? I doubt we have anything to discuss."
"Oh?" Nabiki asked. "I know you were interested in Ranma..."
"Interested? I loved him with a timeless passion! And it shall
all be mine again..."
"Right. But this time why don't you do it right?"
"What do you mean by that?"
"What I mean is, why not go for a boy who's available?" Nabiki
asked, then continued before Kodachi could interrupt. "I just happen to
know of someone who is himself a rising star. I could introduce you to him
for a small fee."
"I'm not interested in anyone else but Ranma."
So what's so special about Ranma?" Nabiki asked.
"He's so strong, and manly," Kodachi sighed. "So handsome."
"Well, the fellow I'm thinking of is just as good-looking as Ranma,
and much stronger. I just know he'd love to meet you."
"Really? I don't suppose it would do any harm to meet him,"
Kodachi mused. "How much did you say this introduction would cost?"
Nabiki smiled.
***************************************************************************
Ryoga staggered into the dojo, slightly battered but not much the
worse for wear. (What was with that Kuno, anyway? It was almost like he
was possessed or something).
"You're late, Ryoga," Kodachi said as she appeared from behind
him. "I thought you were supposed to be here at 6."
"Huh? How did you know that?"
"Hold me," Kodachi cried and flung herself in his arms. Ryoga
froze in surprise. "You are strong," Kodachi whispered. "Here, take
these. Consider them a present for our first date," she said, handing him
a bouquet of black roses. A noxious gas rose from the flowers and Ryoga
passed out...
He woke up in a four-poster bed with a frilly white canopy. A
glance around the room revealed rhythmic gymnastic equipment and trophies,
and a smiling Kodachi.
"Ah, you're awake," Kodachi said cheerfully. "Nabiki said you were
the only person she knew who was special enough for me, and I agree with
her. Though I grieve for the loss of Ranma," she said as a single tear
rolled down her cheek, "I see no reason for the grieving process to delay
the progress of our own romance."
"Wha- there isn't any romance! I hardly even know you!" Ryoga
shouted, straining to sit up.
"But that's why I brought you here, darling. So we could get to
know each other better. Much better," Kodachi said as she perched on the
side of the bed. "You may as well stop fighting. For one as strong and
manly as you, I took extra measures. I gave you an extra dose of paralysis
powder AND chained you to the bed. Now I'm sure to have you all to
myself. You're all mine now, Sweetums," and then she laughed insanely.
"And now," Kodachi said, bending down to kiss him...
**************************************************************************
Ranma walked next to Akane on the way to school the next morning,
still wondering how things had changed so fast. Breakfast had been
peaceful, everyone was smiling...but somehow he felt he'd been set up.
This wasn't exactly what he'd had in mind when he asked Nabiki for help.
He had to admit though, he hadn't heard from...
"Ranma!" Ryoga howled, his voice covering several octaves. "I'm
gonna kill you!" Ranma looked up to see Ryoga racing down the street
toward him, his shirt hanging in tatters. With wild laughter, Kodachi
bounded along behind him.
"Hey, Ryoga! Let's see how you like it!" Ranma taunted as the pair
rushed past them.
A few minutes later, Ryoga ran back again, this time pursued by a
sword-weilding Kuno. "Die, scoundrel!" Kuno shouted. "Ranma! I'll get
you for this!" Ryoga bawled as he ran past.
"Ranma, what about Shampoo?" Akane asked.
"Nabiki told me not to worry. She said taking care of Shampoo and
Kodachi was an engagement present."
****************************************************************************
***
"What you say?" Shampoo asked, wide-eyed. "Boy-type Ranma not
defeat Shampoo?"
"That's right, Shampoo," Nabiki said slyly. "It was an accident.
I know a fellow who could defeat you, though."
"Shampoo not want other boy; want Ranma!"
"Yeah, unfortunately we don't always get what we want. He and
Akane are going to get married."
"Ra-Ranma say he love Akane?" Shampoo asked, her eyes welling up
with tears.
"Don't take it so hard, Shampoo. I thought you only wanted Ranma
because of the law about his defeating you."
"At first, is true. But then Shampoo love Ranma just because he Ranma!"
"Aw, Shampoo, I'm sorry," Nabiki said truthfully, and patted
Shampoo's back while she cried. This was not going according to plan.
****************************************************************************
**
Ranma was making his way through the school hallway when he felt
cold water splashing all along his back.
"Ryoga!" girl-type Ranma snarled. "What is your problem?"
"You broke a man-to-man promise, Ranma. You were supposed to meet
me to fight last night, not set me up with that insane girl."
"Ha! Read the note again, you dummy!" Ranma said, holding up the
crumpled page. "All it says is that if you have the guts to show up you'll
get a surprise. And I'd guess you got a surprise all right,' Ranma
finished with a smirk.
"Ranma, I'm gonna kill you!" Ryoga said. Looking past Ryoga's
shoulder, Ranma spied Kuno.
"Oh, Ryoga!" Ranma yelled loudly enough to draw Kuno's attention
and threw his arms around Ryoga. Ryoga's eyes bugged out in shock and he
pushed Ranma away at arm's length.
"Are you crazy? Fight like a man!" Ryoga shouted. Kuno ran up
behind him, screaming, "Die, you wretch!"
"I'll get you for this, Ranma!" Ryoga cried as Ranma blithely went
on his way.
***************************************************************************
"Shampoo, I may have a solution for your problem," Nabiki said.
"What?" Shampoo asked half-heartedly.
"I have a challenge for you."
"Shampoo not want to fight other boy."
"Remember how you first fell in love with Ranma because of your
Amazon law?" Nabiki asked. Shampoo nodded glumly. "And then you started
to appreciate him as a person?" Another nod. "Why not give this a try,
then?"
"Not want to."
"So you're scared, then?"
"Not scared of any man!"
"Oh, good. I'll tell him you'll be there then. Meet him at 5:30
at the second field of Furinkan high, and be ready for a real fight."
"Meet who?"
"You'll know when you get there," Nabiki said with a smile.
****************************************************************************
"What do you want, Nabiki Tendo?" Kuno asked suspiciously.
"Remember that favor you owe me, Kuno?"
"That was for a letter you took back. I don't owe you anything,
Nabiki."
"Au contraire. I generously gave you that letter free of charge
and in good faith. How was I to know I had the wrong man?" Nabiki narrowed
her eyes shrewdly and went for the kill. "You promised me a future favor.
Are you a man of your word or not?"
"That's not fair!"
"Well?" Nabiki asked.
"Very well, what's the favor?"
"I want you to fight somebody today."
"You wish me to do battle on your behalf?"
"You did give your word."
"Very well, then."
"And you have to really fight, Kuno. No holding back."
"How little you know me, Nabiki Tendo."
"Let's just keep it that way, okay, Kuno-baby?"
****************************************************************************
**
"So, how are things going, Ryoga?" Nabiki asked, craning her neck
to see him hiding behind a row of lockers.
"Terrible! Your plan backfired! I can't even breathe without
either Kuno or his crazy sister trying to kill me!"
"She doesn't want to kill you, she just wants to kiss you."
"Same difference! It's been hell, I tell you, pure hell!"
"Well, at least you got some time alone with her."
"She's not the girl of my dreams! She's a nightmare!"
"Really? I could have sworn you meant Kodachi; that's a shame,
Ryoga. You should have been more specific. Unfortunately there are no
refunds. Better luck next time."
Nabiki left, and Ryoga made a mad dash for the bathroom. One sure
way to keep the Kunos out of his hair was to masquerade as P-Chan. If he
was lucky he might even find his way to Akane's classroom and hide in her
schoolbag for the rest of the day.
"Sweetums! I knew if I waited here you'd show up eventually!"
Kodachi's shrill voice rang out, making Ryoga's hair stand on end. Without
even looking back, he ran with all his might, going through any obstacle
that happened to be between him and escape.
****************************************************************************
**
At 5:25 Ryoga dared to peek out of the tree he had hid in all
afternoon. The second field appeared clear, so he jumped down and
stretched out his cramped muscles.
"So it is you I am sent to fight," Kuno said from behind him.
"This will be a pleasure, scoundrel, for I will surely punish you for your
unchivalrous behavior."
"Why don't you just leave me alone?!?" Ryoga shouted.
"Defend yourself, you evil bewitcher of women!" Kuno bellowed as he
lunged forward with his sword. Ryoga dodged so quickly Kuno sailed past
him from the impetus of the lunge. With one swift movement Ryoga pulled
out his umbrella and whacked Kuno hard enough on the back of the head to
knock him out. He nudged Kuno with one foot, then knelt beside him to be
sure he was still breathing. With a sigh of relief, Ryoga stood and turned
to go to the Tendo house. At least he could spend some time with Akane as
P-Chan.
"So you the one Shampoo is sent to fight," Shampoo said as he
turned to face her. "Friend of Ranma, prepare to lose!" she cried, rushing
at him with deadly grace. Ryoga repeatedly leapt out of her way, using
the umbrella to defend himself.
"Shampoo, I don't want to fight you," Ryoga panted. "Why are you
doing this?"
"Fight! Fight or lose!" Shampoo cried. Ryoga sent his umbrella
sailing into the air, and Shampoo blocked with her bonbori. The umbrella
cleanly sliced through the shafts of her weapons, and Shampoo stared dumbly
at the broken ends for a moment before casting the pieces aside and
attacking hand-to-hand. She let fly a devastating roundhouse kick to the
side of Ryoga's head that left him reeling. He barely saw the other foot
coming at him in time to dodge it. The third time she kicked at him, he
caught her foot and turned, forcing her down to the ground. He landed on
top of her and grabbed hold of her hands. She stared at him, wide-eyed
with shock, and he felt a trickle of blood running down from his temple.
"Will you please stop now?" Ryoga asked. Shampoo nodded and he
slowly let go of her hands and moved to get up. Shampoo threw her arms
around his neck and squeezed hard enough to make him see stars. "I thought
we were done fighting," he choked.
"You defeat Shampoo in battle. Now you be husband," Shampoo said
contentedly. There was no doubting it had been an honest contest this
time.
"Ulp!" Ryoga gasped.
"Sweetums! What are you doing?" Kodachi asked from behind them.
"Urk!" Ryoga answered as Shampoo squeezed again. He tried to push
himself away and then realized that his arms were at full extension and
Shampoo was no longer even touching the ground. With a massive heave,
Ryoga pushed hard enough to get them both upright. He carefully pried
Shampoo's arms from his neck and took a deep breath. Shampoo and Kodachi
were shooting venomous glares at each other. Ryoga slowly started backing
away and accidentally stepped on Kuno.
"Traitorous wretch!" Kuno shouted, sitting bolt upright. Ryoga
backed away faster now, and Shampoo, Kodachi and Kuno started to follow.
"Aaigh!" Ryoga cried, then took off at top speed with the three of
them in hot pursuit. "Ranma, this is all your fault!"
****************************************************************************
It took Ryoga over an hour of running to find the Tendo house, and
once there he dove directly into the pool. P-Chan climbed out and watched
innocently as Shampoo, Kodachi and Kuno searched for Ryoga. Kodachi and
Kuno were loudly arguing whether Kuno should kill him or Kodachi should
marry him, and Shampoo was steadfastly asserting that he was already
engaged. To her. With a deep sigh of relief, P-Chan turned and went into
the house.
"P-Chan! I've been so worried about you!" Akane cried, scooping
him up into her arms. He felt a heated blush creeping across his face.
"When did you get here, you little runt?" Ranma asked. P-Chan
squealed indignantly at him. Ranma held up a cup of hot tea threateningly.
With a piggy shriek of pure terror, P-Chan leapt out of Akane's arms and
scurried away as fast as his little legs would carry him.
"Ranma! You stop picking on P-Chan!" he heard Akane saying. He
took a wrong turn and ended up in the kitchen. Kasumi was preparing
dinner.
"Hello, P-Chan," she said sweetly when she heard him walk in.
"Akane, that reminds me," she called. "Would you go get some ground pork?"
"Okay, Kasumi," Akane called back. "Ranma, you leave P-Chan
alone," she said, and then P-Chan heard her leave. Ranma came into the
kitchen, still carrying the hot tea, and P-Chan scampered out past him. He
felt the tea splash him and then suddenly he was running on two legs
instead of four. By some miraculous chance Ryoga happened to run straight
to the bathroom without getting lost. He partially filled a pail of water
and ran back out after Ranma, splashing water all over the place and
finally getting enough on Ranma to make him change.
Soun Tendo was watching the Kunos and Shampoo look for Ryoga in his
garden when he heard the noise behind him. He turned in time to see naked
Ryoga chasing after female Ranma, who was laughing and apparently enjoying
herself. Soun took a deep breath and went in search of his
friend. He found Genma sitting crosslegged on the floor, contemplating the
game-board they had abandoned an hour ago. Soun silently picked up a
bucket of water and dumped it on his friend's unsuspecting head.
Genma-panda turned around, growling crossly.
"Saotome, we must talk," Soun said. "I must know if Ranma is a boy
who changes into a girl or a girl who changes into a boy. I recently saw
something that has brought this question to light again."
****************************************************************************
"Hey Ryoga," girl-type Ranma sneered, "you don't want Akane to
catch you like that, do you?" Ryoga stopped and realized that he wasn't
wearing any clothing.
"Oops," he said, then poured what was left of the bucket of water
on his own head.
"Oh, P-Chan, there you are," Akane said. P-Chan gasped. Ranma had
warned him just in time! "Come on, baby, it's time for dinner." Shampoo,
Kodachi and Kuno were all seated at the table with the Tendos and Saotomes.
P-Chan tried to keep a wary eye on all three of them as the meal
progressed.
"Ryoga beat Shampoo fair and square, now he Shampoo's husband!"
Shampoo said emphatically.
"Listen, you...you Amazon hussy!" Kodachi snapped. "He's mine, I
saw him first!"
"Neither of you need worry with him again, dear sister, for I
intend to thoroughly thrash him for his discourteous treatment of the
pig-tailed girl," Kuno said coldly.
"This is even better than I thought," Ranma commented to P-Chan.
"You're really getting a taste of your own medicine, aren't you?" P-Chan
oinked at him indignantly. "Ah, it's only what you deserve. Aaigh!' he
shouted as P-Chan bit the bejeesus out of him. Before he could strike
back, P-Chan leapt away and scurried out of the room. Kasumi was on her
way in at the time, and she tripped over the pig, spilling a little hot
soup on him on his way out.
"P-Chan!" Akane cried. Ranma leapt to his feet and followed P-Chan
before anyone else had risen. "Here!" he said, whipping his shirt off and
tossing it at a now-human Ryoga.
"Look out!" Akane cried as she threw cold water at him; both Ranma
and Ryoga changed in an instant. "What did you do that for?" girl-type
Ranma snapped.
"I thought it would help if he'd been scalded. Oh, poor P-Chan!"
"Pig-tailed girl!" Kuno gasped as he peeked around the corner.
"Ulp!" said Ranma, belatedly crossing his arms to preserve the
illusion of feminine modesty. "I'll take care of him," Ranma said
quickly, grabbing P-Chan and beating a hasty retreat. He stopped by his
room to grab a spare pair of pants and then ran straight to the bathroom,
ran the hot water and dragged a protesting P-Chan into the flow.
"Leave me alone, Ranma!" Ryoga gasped.
"Oh, no," Ranma said, wrestling with Ryoga as he tried to turn the
cold-water tap. "You started this, now we're going to finish it." There
was knocking at the door and the sound of several voices.
"Cut that out!" girl-type Ranma cried, slapping P-Chan and turning
the hot-water tap again.
"You stop that, Ranma!" Ryoga hissed. "It's safer being P-Chan,
thanks to you!"
"You gotta choice, Ryoga. Either put the pants on and act like a
man or I'll let them all in now."
"That's no fair!" Ryoga protested as he grabbed the pants. He
barely pulled them on in time before the door crashed open, revealing Kuno,
Kodachi and Shampoo in the doorway with Akane and her sisters peeking in
from behind.
"You cad! What have you done to the pig-tailed girl!" Kuno bellowed.
"Sweetums! I've been looking everywhere for you!" Kodachi squealed.
"Husband! Why you hiding?" Shampoo cried.
All three of them pushed into the bathroom at once, getting stuck
in the doorway. Ryoga dithered for a moment and then ran right through the
bathroom wall in a panic. Kuno, Kodachi and Shampoo squeezed through the
doorway and all three set off in pursuit, chasing Ryoga all around the
garden and over the rooftops.
"I'll get you for this, Ranma!" his voice echoed through the night.
THE END
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
RACHEL,
** **
**** ROAD KILL ON THE INFORMATION HIGHWAY ****
** **
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