Author's notes: Well, I'm calling this one The Reunion because I can't think
of a better title.  Yeah, I know, there was another thing on the ML
recently called Reunion.  Shame on me, though I didn't read it and
accidentally deleted it (if its an actual fic, could someone send me a
copy?  thanks!).  However, this has nothing to do with that.  Just a
strange idea I had.  I hope the characters aren't too OOC, but if they are,
put it down to the passage of ten or twelve years time since the manga
stories.  In addition, I call this semi-lemon because some discussion of
sexual situations take place.  If you're offended by this sort of stuff read
no further.  Well, without further ado...

The Reunion

by Tom Schauer

*******************

We all sat around a table in a private room in a Chinese restaurant.  Not
the Nekohanten, of course, since it didn't have any private rooms, but a
nice fairly upscale (and expensive, I noticed) restaurant in Shibuya.  I'm
still not sure whose idea this was, but I can't help but wonder if it was
such a good idea, putting us all into the same room, even after all these
years.

Ranma and I arrived rather late, and were the last ones to show up. 
Ryouga and Akari were there, as were Shampoo and Mousse, and the
others.  We all said hi, but now we were all just staring at each other in
silence.

Some strange things have happened since Ranma and I got married.  I
had thought that once we had gotten married, things would settle back
down to be relatively normal, but I guess for us this is normal.  

As you know, our first attempt at a wedding ended up nothing short of a
disaster, and we didn't even actually get married.  Our second try was
no less a disaster, though we did get married.  I don't even want to talk
about what happened there...

In any case, shortly after we got married, so did Ryoga and Akari.  I
wasn't too surprised, but I was glad for them.  I always suspected
Ryoga had a crush on me, but I knew he found the real thing when he
found Akari.  But talk about your honeymoons... They were gone for
over four years!  I was worried, but Ranma said they're probably just
lost.  As it developed, Ranma was correct.  But soon after they got back
they started having kids as though they wanted to double the world's
population.  Six children in five years and another on the way.  I wonder
what they're going to do.  Ranma and I have only had one daughter, and
we're already panicking about the expense.  I lie awake some nights
worrying how we're going to send her to a decent college.  

In case you're wondering, our daughter is with Ranma's parents tonight. 
We all agreed to not bring any children to the reunion.  Between Ryouga
and Akari's kids, and Shampoo and Mousse's four and everyone else, if
we had all brought our kids a private room wouldn't have been enough. 
We would have needed a stadium.  And we would all be so busy looking
after our kids we wouldn't have time to talk.  Ranma and I have talked
about having another child, but we're so busy chasing after our one that
I can't imagine what it'd be like to have another, much less six or more.  

As I indicated above, in addition to Ryoga and Akari, Shampoo and
Mousse have married and have four kids.  Unlike Akari, to my knowledge
Shampoo is not pregnant again.  They still run the Nekohanten, which is
very popular, especially since Cologne moved out, but more on that later.

Kasumi married some salaryman.  An accountant.  I had always thought
she would marry Dr. Tofu, but apparently his love was not requited by
Kasumi.  She has two kids, but I understand her husband works ungodly
hours and she and her kids rarely see him except for weekends, when
he collapses in front of the TV.   I notice, at any rate, that Kasumi came to
this reunion unescorted, even though its a weekend.  She seems happy
enough, but, when I'm lying awake worrying about my daughter's future,
I occassionally take time out to thank the kami that Ranma's not like that.  I
think I would be terribly lonely if he was.  I notice, at any rate, that
Kasumi came to this reunion unescorted, even though its a weekend.  

Nabiki did not get married, or at least has not gotten married yet.  She is
the Vice-President of Government Liason for Daibinbou Bank, which
heads up the Daibinbou keiretsu.  I still blush when I think about how she
got *that* position, but whatever makes her happy, I guess.

Ukyou and Konatsu still live together and manage Ucchan's Okonomiyaki. 
They never married but that didn't stop them from having a child.  Their
son is one year younger than our daughter.  Ranma and I were
surprised, to say the least, but I don't like to moralize over other people's
choices.

Thankfully, Kodachi couldn't make it.  She's a model in America now,
which I think goes to show what poor taste Americans have.  She
married some rock star, divorced, and lives in Hollywood.  I understand
she fits right in there.

Unfortunately, Kuno was able to attend with his wife Cologne.  Yes, if
you're not familiar with what's happened since we were teenagers, it
sounds strange.  I said that things hadn't gotten any less strange around
here since Ranma and I married, didn't I?  Well, I've known about it for six
years and it still seems exceedingly strange.  The mental image is not one
I like to contemplate.  It's a little like the thought of me with Happosai.  Ugh!
 I don't even want to think about it.  Back to Kuno and Cologne, though, I
have to admit I'm surprise the marriage has lasted this long.  Reflecting on
it in hindsight, with the maturity I've gained over the years, I have to say
that this couple is severely mismatched.  I mean, Cologne could have
done *much* better than Kuno.  But, it's her life...

Speaking of Happosai, he couldn't make it either, fortunately.  First of all,
no one invited him.  Second, we don't know where he is.  Last we
heard, he went to the French Riviera, had a heart attack, and was
recovering under the care of three young nurses and a young lady
doctor.  I don't expect to hear from him again.

I was lost in my thoughts when I noticed some conversation started. 
You know, the kind of light chat that goes on when people feel obliged to
speak but aren't comfortable doing so.

"OK, Ryoga" Nabiki was saying, "so what's the most embarrassing
sexual situation you've ever been in?"

So much for light conversation.

"Oneechan!"  I exclaimed.  "I don't think that's appropriate here!"

"Hey, he brought it up.  Say, let's all tell our stories here.  I'm sure we'd all
like to hear about *your* most embarrassing situation."  Nabiki said as she
leered at Ranma and me.

Ranma spoke before I could.  "Um, I think that's already known to
everyone here, so let's drop it, OK?  I don't think we need to hash this
one out again.  Besides, it's no worse than yours!"

All of which was true.  Remember how I said our actual wedding was a
disaster?  Well, what made it a disaster was that my own father, as
soon as the vows were spoken and the marriage finalized, to the utter
shock of everyone present, grabbed me and Ranma, locked us in a
closet, and loudly announced that we weren't getting out until I was
pregnant.  We were not amused, but there was nothing for it but to do it
right there.  Otherwise, he wouldn't have let us out.  Also, as neither of
us had brought any birth control, there was the possibility of pregnancy,
but luckily that didn't happen.  But everyone in the room now, as well as
numerous others, was present for that scene.  Needless to say, being
locked into a cramped closet and having an audience did not make for a
brilliant first time.  I have not felt more humiliated before or since, and I
can't imagine Ranma felt differently.  I still cringe when I think of the looks
on everyone's faces when that happened.  I mean,   even Ranma's
father was taken aback.  I have never forgiven my father for that.  I
mean, I had only just forgiven him for engaging me to Ranma and he pulls
a stunt like that. 

As for Nabiki, she had been working as an assistant to one of the vice
presidents of Daibinboo bank.  In her position, she occassionally met with
and lobbied among high level bureaucrats and politicians.  Well, one night
she was caught boffing the prime minister himself.  It might not have
been so bad, but they were doing it on the floor of the upper house of
the Diet.  Now, it's not like they were doing this while the Diet was in
session or anything.  It was in the middle of the night, but C-Span had
been replacing the cameras in the upper house, and were testing them
out.  Then Nabiki and the PM came in and did their thing, and it was all
captured on videotape.  I've always wondered how they could have
avoided noticing anything was happening.  I suspect Nabiki *did* notice,
but went ahead anyway for what will become obvious reasons.  Well, to
make a long story short, the next morning, everyone in Japan was
woken up to the news of this little "encounter".  The heads of other
keiretsu were furious, the scandal was immense, and that cabinet was
brought down and a new one installed.  Meanwhile, Nabiki sold her story
for a large undisclosed sum.  In addition, she was a heroine to her
company for making a "noble sacrifice on behalf of the company" and
was promoted to Vice President of Government Liason, a position that
didn't previously exist and was created just for her.  There are few
people in Japan who would not now recognize Nabiki.

"...so there we were," Ryoga was speaking.  I started guiltily as I
realized that my mind had wandered from the conversation.  What were
they talking about now?  I looked at Ranma, who sat with a stunned
expression on his face.  Everyone, even Nabiki was listening to Ryoga
with the same expression on there face.  Ryoga continued "We were in
a bathroom on the bullet train to Tokyo, the conducter was pounding on
the door for us to open the door, and at least two dozen people were
milling about trying to find out what was going on.  Now remember, our
clothes were still in the station at Kobe, and we were moving away from
them at over 200 kilometers an hour..."  Still talking about embarrassing
sexual situations, apparantly.  But this one was a doozy.  I have to admit,
after listening to his story, it beats Ranma and my wedding experience
any day.  Geez, at least we didn't get arrested!  No wonder they were
gone so long.  Wow.

No one spoke up after Ryoga's story about him and Akari.  No one had a
more embarrassing experience.  I doubt anyone could.  

We sat around in silence for a while.  After all, what catching up was
there to do.  Everyone still lived in the same neighborhood, everyone
knew what everyone else was up to.  Why did we have this reunion
anyway.  Not a very bright idea.  Though the food was good and it gave
us all an excuse to go out and take a break from our everyday lives,
break up the monotony a bit.  I suppose it did serve that purpose, so
maybe it wasn't all bad.  It probably would have been better if we had
seen people we hadn't seen for a while, but well, I guess that's water
under the bridge.  After we finished eating, we all get up and left for
home.  

After we separated from the others, Ranma said "Wow, and I thought
we had it bad at our wedding.  I'd rather go through that every day than
go through what Ryoga and Akari did once."

I nodded, but in a playful mood, I upped the ante.  "Yeah, I'd even rather
do it without the benefit of the closet door.  Everyone just staring at us."

He smiled.  Not to be outdone, he said "Sure.  I mean, I'd even rather do it
in a big stadium, with thousands of people cheering us on!"

I laughed and said "Why stop there?  Why not televise it live around the
world?"

He grinned maliciously.  "Well, I'm sure, with your sister's help, we could
arrange that!"  We both fell to giggling as we walked on through the night.

END

*********************************************

Boy, I must be ill.  As I said, I don't know where that one came from. 
Bizarre thoughts that occur to you, eh?  Maybe I should have eaten
dinner last night instead of pretzels and See's candy.   I will note that I
went to my own high school reunion less than a month ago, though
nobody had stories as interesting as the ones Akane relates (though Jeff
Tarango, who made a name for himself at Wimbledon a few years ago,
some of you may recall, was there.  I had a chemistry class with him. 
He's much nicer in person than he otherwise appeared then, I should
note).  Well, tell me what you think.  Thanks in advance.