Date: Mon, 11 Nov 1996 03:05:27 +1100 (EST)
   From: David Bateson <major@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au>

   An interesting and thoughtful piece of work.

   The family reunion was masterfully handled.

Indeed, right down to Ranma's actions towards poor Kentaro.

   The solution to the problem... was difficult to swallow, but bearable for 
   the sake of the plot.

Are you referring to retrieving the kettle?  That was pretty obvious
given the state of the art in remote sensing and sufficient yen.

   The final ending...  contrived and artifical is the first reaction I had, 
   thinking about it I cannot really say why, but for me it totally lacks 
   impact and is simply the author using deux ex machina to make things come 
   out as he always intended them to.

I suppose "true love" could be read as a "deux ex machina" to some (1/2 :-)   

   Unfair of me... but stories are things of emotion, and this suceeds
   wildly in places only to fall flat at the end.

I suspect opinions are going to be widely varying about this.  For me
it all worked, to the very end (and given the premise, I'm somewhat
surprised).  The story had me caring very much about who Ranma ended
up with, and given that I didn't want it to be the ones who'd betrayed
him back when he got locked into female mode, the dramatic tension was
palpable---and this is very unusual for a fanfic.  

Given the setup, it hinges on your ability to believe Ranma would have
been able to re-program him/herself in the 3 years between the
stories, and that this, plus the betrayal, would have closed off the
Akane option.  At that point, it is believable Ranma would have chose
not to throw away what he/she had found with Kentaro, for experience
has taught Ranma some really hard lessons about love.

It had impact for me, and I'd say that means it has impact in general,
just not impact that everyone is going to be able to appreciate.

   Very Dissappointing.

Not to me.

   Date: Sun, 10 Nov 1996 11:15:21 -0600
   From: Richard Lawson <sterman@sprynet.com>

   David Bateson wrote:
   > The final ending...  contrived and artifical is the first reaction I had,
   > thinking about it I cannot really say why, 

   If you can ever say why, let me know.  I'd like to fix it.

So far, I've found very little I'd change in it (maybe more Kentaro
character development, but I'm not sure how to do that; we have to
accept the character on faith, and he's realistic enough (and fallible
enough, especially in this installement), that this is a reasonable of
demand of the author).  I'm not sure this is something subject to
fixing, rather, it might not be a story that all or most can
appreciate, at least at the current points in their lives.

Having been jilted by my fiance, I suspect I'm in a good position to
appreciate the story....

					- Harold