Enjoy, people. C&C.
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^_- I L L M E T B Y S T A R L I G H T ^_-
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By Mike Loader and Susan Doenime
Chapter 1 - Here's Ranma.
"The gods have two jars,
>From one they take good, the other evil, and so make men
Some have more of one than of the other
Of such are humankind."
- Theses
"Can a great waterway be turned from it's course, or indeed
blocked, by a single pebble? Only if it's a Goddamned river.
But, call it God, Fate, random chance, or what you will; it
displays a wonderful and horrifying talent for moving worlds
with a grain of sand."
- John Wells
"Zwei Seelen wohnen ach! in meiner Brust..."
- Goethe
There are, as has been repeatedly and rather monotonously
stated, many universes.
This is, on the whole, a good thing for authors. When the
ideas are coming short, they can whip out the old parallel
universe/alternate history chestnut. They even get to give
wise and mystical-sounding introductions, which are fun to
write and go over real well with audiences.
It is, however, not such a good thing for the story's
characters. This is because it's boring to write about a
alternate universe where everything is actually _better_ than
the "Normal" one.
Ask any of these characters their favorite line from
Shakespeare, and they will invariably return the grim old
couplet from Lear:
"Like flies to wanton boys are we to the gods;
They kill us for their sport."
Thankfully, most of them are blissfully unaware of being
fictional, as are you.
In many universes exists a individual known as Saotome
Ranma.
This is the tale of one of them.
^_-
Tendo Soun was a happy man.
A short while ago, he had received a postcard from his old
friend, Saotome Genma. It was short, concise, and very much to
the point.
"Bringing Ranma from China."
Soun had long hoped that the families of his and his oldest
friend would blend. Now, it seemed, his dream was to come
true. The only problem, as he saw it, was surviving his
daughters' reactions.
Kasumi, bless her, would accept it dutifully.
Nabiki would find a way to make money off it.
Akane would hit something repeatedly, probably him.
Luckily, Anything-Goes taught a simple, addictive way of
defending oneself from trouble. "If no-one knows, everyone is
happy. When knowing is necessary, strike swiftly."
He would wait until the last moment to tell his daughters.
Preferably until he was not the only moving target in the room.
^_-
They arrived a few hours later.
Soun recognized his old friend immediately. True, he was
somewhat stouter...and balder...but Genma was still Genma.
The person accompanying him had to be Ranma. Strange...
neither Genma nor Nodoka had red hair And the facial
features...
The facial features....
"This is Ranma?" asked an incredulous Nabiki.
Soun's mind realized that something was wrong, but was
having trouble figuring out what.
Nabiki poked Ranma in the chest.
Ranma looked at Nabiki.
Nabiki gazed back, and slowly stepped away.
The chest....
It occurred to Soun that Ranma was a girl.
Soun did the intelligent thing and fainted.
Kasumi smiled sweetly. "You must be Mister Saotome. Did
you have a nice trip?"
Genma, taken aback, nodded. "We had a calm sea." He bent
down to lift his old friend to his feet. "Um, should I take your
father up to his room?"
"Oh, would you?" Kasumi burbled. "Daddy gets overwrought
at times..."
Nabiki was still staring at Ranma like a bird at a snake. The
redhead stared back, her expression unreadable.
Akane felt a wave of relief wash over her. Apparantly she
wouldn't have to kill her father after all. And this new girl
might be fun...
She cleared her throat. "Hi. I'm Tendo Akane."
The girl turned her gaze from Nabiki. "Saotome Ranma."
"Would you like to join me in the dojo?"
Ranma glanced at her father, who was slinging Soun over his
shoulders to carry upstairs. "Sure."
Akane leading, the two walked off.
"What a nice girl," Kasumi commented.
Nabiki stared at her older sister. "Right," she muttered.
^_-
The dojo was a simple but serene building, combining beauty
and function.
"So, do you do Kempo?" Akane asked brightly. Probably not,
she thought.
To her surprise, Ranma gave a short nod.
"Would you like to have a match?"
Something moved in Ranma's eyes. "I'd like that."
Akane smiled happily. Finally, someone who shared her
interests! And living in the same house! She dropped into a
fighting stance, expecting the other girl to do the same.
Ranma just stood there, though, an odd little smile playing
across her face.
Better go easy, Akane thought. At least until she had a better
idea of Ranma's ability.
Shouting a loud kiai, Akane lunged forward, aiming an easily-
read punch at Ranma's midsection...
A flicker in the eyes....
The kick took Akane in the stomach, throwing her back a few
feet.
Wincing, Akane regained her feet. Ranma stood where she had
been, slight smile still in place. Akane narrowed her eyes.
Ranma was good, it seemed, and didn't liked being patronized.
She could understand that; she hated it when males tried to
"go easy" on her because of her sex. Well, no more holding
back.
Moving into a graceful stance reminiscent of Taido, she
slowly advanced, moving in a complicated rhythm designed to
confuse the opponent. A few more steps, and...
Ranma went from stationary to blur in a heartbeat,
soundlessly springing for her like a jaguar from a branch. She
barely had time to move into a defensive kata before the other
girl crashed into her with terrifying force.
The kata was one of her best; a series of blinding sweeps and
thrusts calculated to fend off multiple attackers. It seemed as
much use against Ranma as a sand castle was against the
ocean. A punch smashed into her midsection, then a foot took
her in the shoulder, a block turned into a strike...
And then suddenly she was flying, the floor moving towards
her like a freight train.
Dimly, she stumbled to her feet, shaking her head to clear it.
Ranma wasn't just good, she was easily one of the best
martial artists Akane had ever seen. But she recognized the
form; Ranma used Anything-Goes, just like her. And Anything-
Goes, like all styles, had weaknesses.
She purposely stumbled, still trying to appear dazed. It was
clear that she'd only get one shot at this...
Akane went from staggering to charging in the blink of an
eye, running forward in a series of straight, powerful thrusts
she had developed to counter her father's techniques.
Anything-Goes taught cunning countermoves and attacks,
turning the elaborate katas and maneuvers of the opponent into
a trap. But it simply couldn't deal, at times, with a basic but
random pattern of applied force.
Ranma stood her ground, but for the first time seemed alert.
Akane pressed forward, and Ranma sprang....
...up and over the wall of Akane's fists...
...and then Akane felt hands along her throat, as Ranma
vaulted by overhead...
...and realized that if Ranma bore down, or twisted those
hands like so, her neck would snap...
...and she felt the tell-tale increase in pressure, and numbly
realized that that was exactly what Ranma was going to do...
...and then Ranma landed, and the hands slipped away. Akane
turned, feeling rather foolish for thinking that...
Their eyes met.
Ranma's held amusement on the surface, but under that was
something else, something less controlled. I could have, the
stare said. I could have, and I might have, and I didn't.
Akane kept herself perfectly composed. But there was fear in
her eyes, and the other girl knew it.
"Good match," Ranma said. Her smile was warm and friendly.
"You're really good," Akane came out with. "Did you learn
that in China?
"Yeah. I learned a lot of stuff in China." There was a hint of
bitterness there.
"What was it like?"
Ranma actually looked...uncomfortable? "We traveled a lot.
The old man kept us moving. Never stayed in one place. Never
settled down." The uncomfortable tone was moving towards
anger. Akane moved back unconsciously.
And then the anger was gone, replaced by the friendly smile
that almost touched the eyes. Almost.
"It'll be nice to live here for a while. Put down roots. Build
something. A home."
Akane's heart went out to her; life on the road couldn't have
been easy. The poor girl probably just needed a home, and a
family. The Tendos, she resolved firmly, would give that to
her. "Come on. I'll show you the rest of the house."
She strode out. Ranma hesitated and then followed, the half-
smile playing once again across her features.
^_-
After the brief tour, Ranma excused herself, saying that she
needed to bathe. Akane showed her the changing room, and
made her way to the front of the house. She'd have to show
Ranma around school as well...help her make new friends. She
would give Ranma a home, and a life...
"Akane. Can I talk to you for a second?"
Akane looked up, startled out of her reverie. Nabiki was
standing in front of the living room door, an unusually sober
expression on her normally irreverent face. "Sure, Oneechan.
What's up?"
Nabiki leaned forward. "Be very careful with Ranma. She's
dangerous."
Akane stared at her sister. "What do you mean?"
Nabiki twisted uncomfortably. "Look, sis, I'm good at reading
people. You know that." Akane nodded; that was certainly true.
"And everything about her is....wrong. Her eyes. There's
something dead or broken in there, and it scares the hell out of
me."
"She's had a hard life, Nabiki. All those years on the road..."
"No," Nabiki snapped. "It's more than that. Look, Akane..."
Akane felt her temper rise. "She's never had a family, Nabiki.
Or a home. Or a friend, I think. That's enough to make anyone a
little reserved."
"Akane, restaurant tables are reserved. Ranma is a different
case. The sooner she's gone, the better I'll feel."
That was the last straw. "Nabiki, you can be a real bitch at
times. Just throw her back into the street, is that it? I'm
going to make her at home here, and you'd better do your share.
If I catch you bullying her..."
Nabiki gave a hollow laugh. "I'd as soon bully a viper. Fine, be
nice to her. Just.....be careful, okay?"
Akane smiled. "I will." A rivulet of sweat ran into her eyes,
she absently wiped it away. "And now, I think I'd better wash
up. I'm filthy."
"You do that."
Akane turned around and walked off to the bathroom. Her
sister watched her go, worry written across her face.
^_-
Akane was still fuming as she entered the changing room.
Nabiki was probably coming up with a way to take Ranma for
everything she was worth, and wanted Akane to stand aside.
Sometimes her sister almost sickened her.
As she removed her shirt, she noticed Ranma's clothing
folded over a chair. Hopefully she hadn't used at the hot water;
at the moment Akane wanted nothing more than a nice, hot
bath. Amazing how just a little warm water could get rid of
tension, stress, anger...
Opening the screen, she stepped into the bathroom. And froze.
A strange boy stood inside, wearing the same thing she was.
Which was nothing.
He stared at her. She stared back, her mouth moving silently.
After what seemed an eternity, the boy's surprised look
slowly changed into a leer. He moved forward a step.
Akane screamed and ran.
^_-
Kasumi looked up from her book to see her youngest sister
race past, keening like a banshee who had just been goosed..
"Is something wrong, Akane?"
"THERE'S A HENTAI IN THE BATHROOM!" was the reply.
Kasumi frowned. Well-ordered households weren't supposed
to have sexual deviants wandering around.
Akane raced back, this time armed with a katana. "I'LL KILL
HIM! I'LL SLICE IT OFF!"
Genma descended the stairs, a incredulous-looking Soun in
tow. "Happened already, has it?" he said, sounding resigned.
"Daddy! Mr. Saotome! There's a strange man, naked, in the
bathroom!"
The strange man in question picked this moment to walk in.
He seemed to have acquired clothing, Akane noted. Ranma's
clothing.
She leveled the katana towards him. "What have you done
with Ranma?!"
The boy laughed, sounding scornful and amused at the same
time. Akane's heart sank, he had probably done something
terrible to the poor girl. Her fingers tightened around the
blade's hilt, and she prepared to swing.
Something crashed into her, and she realized that it was the
boy. The katana was wrenched from her hands, and she was
flung back, to land in a sprawling heap on the sofa.
Her attacker spun the katana in a swift circle, and then
drove the point into the floor. Surveying the stunned room, he
gave them a sardonic grin. "I'm Saotome Ranma. Sorry about all
this."
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End Chapter One
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Susan: Now that was fun, wasn't it? Anyway, here we are, the
authors. Susan Doenime...
Mike: And Mike Loader. Anyway, this little piece came about
due to a conversation on ZerMUX. We were discussing a
charming little piece called, "It's 11:00"...
Susan: And boy, was it OOC! I mean, Lawson's latest was just
peanuts compared to how amazingly OOC this was. I mean, I
was just really...
Mike: I think they get the point. So Susan says, "It's like he's a
whole different Ranma!"
Susan: And Mike says, "Well, what kind of Ranma?" And I go,
"Not a nice one." And then it kinda hit us at the same time.
Mike: It was a great idea, but I didn't have the time. Besides, I
don't do darkfics.
Susan: Right. And Smoke and Mirrors is a..?
Mike: That ain't dark!
Susan: Uh-huh. Anyway, we decided to co-write. Which was
fun, until we hit the first big problem.
Mike: I still say it's Ryoga, not Ryouga.
Susan: Romanization, yup. We compromised, so you'll see some
names appearing with ou, and others with just o.
Mike: We decided to write to the same music. I'm one of the
few Pogues fans in North America...
Susan: And Kasumi's Guest was written to Paul Simon...
Mike: But we felt something a bit rougher was needed.
Susan: And so it came to pass that this was composed to
Queen. "Master of Your Destiny" (Gimme the Prize) was a
favorite for this. Wonder why.
Mike: And yes, there's a reason why Ranma is the way he is.
You'll find out.
Susan: Well, hope you liked the first chapter! C&C!
- Mike Loader
- Susan Doenime
Brisbane, U of Q
"I hit the streets / They watched me in the monitor..."