This one's a little different for me, it isn't a darkfic. 
I don't think it's a darkfic. It is possible that Shampoo learns more than 
Cologne thought she was teaching.  And in spite of the (working) title, it is 
*not* a lemon.  I'm far too old to do lemons.  C & C please?  
	Thanks be to Takahashi Rumiko-sama for her unmatchable characters.  
Thanks also be to the Icine.  We have not forgotten.


The base language of this story is Chinese.  The symbols <...> mark Japanese.  
Please remember that whatever Shampoo's skills in Japanese, Chinese is her 
native language.  


	                         BEDTIME STORY
			
				S h a z o r n

Ranma grumbled under his breath as Akane followed Nabiki's lead and ordered 
the most expensive dish on the menu.  

	"<A real gentleman pays up without complaining when he loses a bet,>"
Nabiki smiled sweetly.  "<It isn't something you learn, it's just inbred 
through your roots.>"

        "<I guess I just ain't got no real roots,>" Ranma remarked sadly.  
"<Me 'n' Pop've just always been wandering.>"  He stared out of the sparklingly 
clean window of the Nekohanten.  Nabiki and Akane looked at him.

        "<Haven't you?>"  Nabiki asked.  "<I would have thought you would have 
counted the house your mother lives in.>"

        "<Not really,>" Ranma responded.  "<Uh, Pops bought that house just 
before I was born.  Don't even remember much about it.>"

        "<Oh,>" Nabiki was curious.  "<He had money to buy a house in those 
days?>"

        Ranma reddened and averted his eyes.  "<Uh, Mom's dowry,>" he mumbled.

        "<We Tendos have real roots,>" Akane said smugly. "<Our great 
grandparents owned our property.>"

        "<That not so long ago,>" Shampoo grinned at her from the counter.  
"<Forreal root, our Amazon village go all the way back.>"

        "<All the way back to where?>" Akane sniffed.  

        "<To the beginning,>" Mousse confirmed as he placed their orders on 
the table before them.  "<It has been there for centuries, perhaps even 
millennia.  No one knows when it first began.>"

Cologne, listening from the kitchen door, nodded to herself.

That night, after the restaurant was spotless and declared passible by Cologne,
Shampoo watched impassively as her great-grandmother splashed Mousse with cold 
water and put him in his cage for the night.  Shampoo accepted Cologne's 
explanation, it was cheaper to feed a duck than a human, but still the young 
girl painstakingly made sure Mousse's water bowl and food tray were filled 
with fresh supplies before she went to her room.  
	
	"Good night, Mu-Mu-chan," she said.  Mousse quacked sadly after her.

Shampoo had finished her evening oblations, changed into her rather revealing 
nightwear (well, it was *possible* her husband might drop by) and was sitting 
on the edge of her bed brushing out her hair when the knock came at the door.  
Cologne's voice called her name, and on receiving an answer, Cologne slid back 
the door and came in.

	"I heard the conversation this evening, about roots and origins," the 
old woman pulled a chair around and sat down facing Shampoo.  "There are things 
you should know about your own culture and its history.  It is time you 
learned."
	
Shampoo smiled as she snuggled under the cover, preparing to listen.  She 
enjoyed hearing tales of her people.

	"First off, we have not always been Amazons, properly at the beginning 
of the story we were no more than a matriarchy.  Do you understand the 
difference?"  Cologne looked hard at her great-daughter.  Shampoo looked 
puzzled and shook her head.

	"Perhaps two thousand years ago or more, there were many tribes of us.  
We occupied much of what is now central China.  Each tribe was governed by a 
council of wise women which generally acted as advisor to its most influential 
and respected member.  That member was known as the Head Woman of her village."

	"Oh, politics," Shampoo was clearly bored.  She had been hoping for an 
exciting story.

	"To understand what is, you must understand what was," Cologne looked 
sternly at her.  Shampoo nodded, accepting her fate.

	"There was one village which had an additional structure.  In addition 
to its council and Head Woman, there was a very special person.  We called her 
the Queen, and she had for her council of advisors the Head Women of all of the 
tribes.  At the time of this story, the Queen's name was Shan Pu."

Shampoo's eyes went wide with this, her interest in the story picking up 
instantly.  

	"Shan Pu?  Like me??"

	"Yes, child, like you."  Cologne smiled briefly.  "She was the last 
Queen, so we remember her name.  We remember her story and pass it on from 
generation to generation."  

	"What was she like, this Queen Shan Poo?"  Shampoo wheedled.

	"She was very wise and skilled," the old woman said, glancing at the 
girl.

	"I mean, was she beautiful?"  Shampoo asked.

	"Child, after a period of two thousand years, only the important 
details are remembered,"  Cologne chided.  "Still, she did marry and had a 
number of children.  So she must not have been too hard looking.  To answer 
your next question, yes, her husband comes into the story.  He was not a man 
of our people, but an outsider, so the marriage may well have been for love.  
His name was Zhongma, and he was a renown fighter."

	"So Zhongma beat Queen Shan Poo in a fight and they got married.  How 
lovely,"  Shampoo sighed.

	"Probably not.  We were a matrichal society then, not yet an Amazon 
one.  We were a peaceful culture, not devoted to fighting and arms.  Unless 
there is some overwhelming reason, matriachal cultures have quieter goals than 
those dominated by men.  So it is probably true that she was beautiful, he was 
handsome and that they married for love."  Cologne said thoughtfully.  "But he 
was an outsider and he was a fighter.  He practiced individual combat and 
taught his skills to their children."

	"Queen Shan Poo wasn't a fighter, then?"  Shampoo sounded disappointed.

	"There was an army to defend our borders.  Among her many other duties, 
the Queen commanded the army, consisting of especially trained men and women 
from all the villages.  The army was skilled at co-ordinated attack and 
defense, not individual combat.  So there was very little trouble with 
mauraders or invaders.  We didn't try to expand our borders or to enrich 
ourselves at other's expense, those are mens' goals.  The Queen was a master 
of strategy and tactics; her job demanded a warrier rather than a fighter,"  
Cologne explained.  

	"She was the last queen?  What happened?"  Shampoo asked.

	"Our country was bordered by a provence of the empire.  The governer of 
the provence had cast his eyes on our riches many times, but learned by 
experience that his army of individual fighters was no match in combat with an 
army that fought as a unit with skill and co-ordination.  So he turned to guile 
and treachery.  
	Zhongma was originally from this provence and returned there for visits 
to his relatives from time to time.  The governer threw parties in his honour, 
praising Zhongma as a man among men.  Wine flowed like water; there were 
competitions in individual combat which Zhongma always seemed to win.  He was 
feted as a great King,"  Cologne recited.

	"King?" Shampoo asked.

	"Hush, child, I am telling the story.  Of course not.  We didn't have a 
King.  He was only the Queen's consort and had no other standing among us. But 
he was a man and the praise went to his head.  The governer persuaded Zhongma 
to sign a paper 'binding our country and the empire in friendship'.  Zhongma 
was proud of what he considered a diplomatic coup and never so much as glanced 
at the paper he signed.  What it really said was that our country was bound to 
-given over to - the empire to do with as it liked."  Colone said grimly.

	Shampoo blinked her large eyes in surprise.

	"You may well imagine that when Zhongma returned and the Queen 
discovered what he had done, she was enraged.  She was so angry that, although 
what she did next was right, she didn't take proper precautions.  She and her 
eldest daughters, already being groomed for the succession, took a small 
escort and left immediately for the provencial capitol.  They appear to have 
left a much chastized Zhongma behind.  
	Now comes the most shameful part of the story.  When Queen Shan Poo and 
her escort reached the capital, she stormed in on the governer.  She told him 
in no uncertain words that the document was not valid, that Zhongma had no 
legal right to sign it.  She shredded her copy of the document and threw it in 
his face.
	The governer laughed.  He told her coldly that the document was signed 
by the chief male of the kingdom, which made it legal.  He told her she was a 
mere woman and had to learn her place.  Then he had the Queen and her daughters 
stripped of their clothing and whipped in public.  They were then frog-marched 
to the gates of the capitol and thrown out."

Shampoo's eyes were wide with horror in her pale face as she listened.

	"The Queen returned home immediately.  Word had preceeded her and by 
the time she got back, her army was already in the process of gathering.  In 
the space of a very few days, it swept into the provence leaving a trail of 
destruction behind it.  The Queen used all her warrier skills.  She completely 
destroyed the governer's army and burnt the three largest cities, including 
the capitol, to the ground.  She did not find the governer, he had already 
departed to take a copy of the document to the emperor.  When she returned 
home, the provence behind her was an unpopulated wasteland,"  Cologne's voice 
was a monotone.  She motioned to Shampoo to remain silent.

	"The Queen knew what was to come.  This was only one provence of a 
large empire.  She immediately did two things.  She ordered a total 
mobilization of the country.  Men, women and children able to bear arms were 
all gathered.  Strong points were secured and food stored in them.  Attacks, 
defences and ambushes were planned.  The Queen had no illusions about her 
chances against the massed forces of the empire, but submission could not be 
endured.  
	The other thing she did was to prepare a hidden place far into the 
shunned mountains, where she sent the small children and those unable to fight. 
To guard them and to insure there would be someone in the future who would 
remember, she sent a special guard of women fighters who had been trained in 
combat techniques by Zhongma.  She appointed her youngest daughter, Kuh-lon, 
to be the captain of the guard and the Head Woman of the village.  To the 
guard, she gave particular instructions.  Whatever happened outside the 
mountains, the village must remain hidden.  If it were found, it must be 
defended to the death.  Thus all in the village were to devote themselves to 
developing fighting skills.  The village was to become, not just a matriarchal 
society, but an Amazon society.  This was our village.  These were the last 
orders of our Queen. Fight and breed fighters. We have obeyed them for two 
thousand years, and we have survived."

	"But - but the Queen, and the others?"  Shampoo asked.

	"Why, what do you think happened?"  Cologne smiled grimly.  "It was 
not an army that came, it was many armies.  The emperor was very angry at the 
loss of his provence.  What eventually happens if you kill ten, to find them 
replaced by a hundred?  If you kill a hundred, to find them replaced by a 
thousand?  It is said that Zhongma went berserk in defense of his Queen, and 
no man dared fight him until archers brought him down from a distance.  It is 
said that at the very end, the Queen and her daughters killed themselves by 
poison rather than be captured.  It is said that the empire was so weakened 
that when the mongols came down from the north, it too went down."

	"So the beginning of our village was the end of our splendor..."  
Shampoo sounded troubled.

	"Not so, child.  It was the continuation, even if on a greatly reduced 
scale, of our culture.  The only *real* change was the shift in emphasis from 
peacefulness to an Amazon aspect.  There have been two or three times since 
then that our ability in arms has led to the salvation of our way of life.  Of 
course, to be honest a knowledge of 'magic' helped, as did a superstitious 
dread of the curses nearby.  
	We have no fear of modern weapons either.  China ignores us, and if 
someone else were to try to use them on us, they would have China on their 
hands immediately.  We need only practice our arts and breed for strength."  
To Cologne, it was the telling argument.

	"Great-grandmother," Shampoo sounded even more troubled, "was Zhongma 
strong?"

	"The strongest, child,"  Cologne grinned suddenly.  "It is your duty 
as an Amazon to marry such a man and raise many strong children by him. Good 
night."

The old woman left the room, switching off the light behind her and closing 
the door.  

	"But it was Zhongma's pride that caused it all," Shampoo whispered to 
herself.  "Maybe macho pride is a weakness, not a strength.  Maybe real 
strength is supportative, not self willed."

Shampoo lay in her bed, staring thoughtfully into the dark for a long time.

	"Maybe I have not yet met my husband,"  Shampoo closed her eyes.



					Author's note:
  
	This is based on a story that really happened.  It was on the other 
side of the world from China, in 60 a.d.  The empire was Rome; the governer's 
name was Suetonius.  The burned cities were Canulodumum (Colchester), 
Verulamium and Londinium.  The matriarchy was the Iceni and the Queen's name 
was Boadicea.  
	The winner's side of the story may be found in Tacitus, "The Annals of 
Imperial Rome", in Chapter 12: Nero and his helpers.  I think Tacitus sounds a 
little embarassed by the story in spite of himself.
	Thanks to all who answered my question about the Chinese word for 
stallion.  I have gone with James Hung's suggestion of Zhong Ma for stud horse.
	

S h a z o r n
<rayburn@cc.umanitoba.ca>