I have NO idea where this fic came from, please enjoy or delete at your
own descretion. Comments are welcome though grammer checking is probably
NOT nessicary. Anyone wishing I continue in this peculiar endevor please
be willing to toss me a few ideas. Any fic writer who wants his name
removed from my sister's commentary (this is an accurate portrayal of a
few of her thoughts) let me know. Anyone who wants to be added or that I
forgot (this fic was written in the space of an hour on little or no
sleep) please feel free to beat me and demand I place you accordingly.

	
	OtakuNXS presents...

		Pretty Spammy!!!

	The door creaked slightly as the young girl's head appeared through the
crack. A quick scan of the room revealed it to be devoid of human life.
Still this WAS Keener's room and therefore not to be taken lightly.
Perhaps there was no human life, but the ferocious tribes of man-eating
gecko's and wild chibi anime characters warred with each other
continually. A never ending struggle for attention and territroy beneath
black, forbiding mountain ranges of dirty laundry. 

	Sensing a presence, his big chest began to rumble slighlty. A strange
music, reminsent of seventies funk came from it's darkened lid. The
force of over two-hundred hentai manga and doushinji casting an erie
blue light through the chest's surface cracks, illuminating various
posters of the Goddess, Ryoko. On a nearby coach, a box of Animayhem
crackled and poped as various conflicting realities moaned under the
stress of being so close together and a un-finished fic howled
meancingly in the distance.

	Clutching her Tamagotchi to her chest for strength, the girl moved
carefully into the room, stocially ignoring the in-joke as an SD
Kusanagi wrestled with a monster of folded paper. A pack of rabid black
piglets, eyes aglow with an evil red light, eyed her hungrily. Finally
making her way to the computer, the girl sat down and caught her breath.
The un-finished fic sniffed her questioningly and loped off to join the
rest of his brethern. His low moaning howl said that THE master hadn't
returned, but a second and more confident howl stated that A master had
come. 

	She sighed in relief, as long as she had the support of THAT pack, no
harm would come to her. The various denziens took the moment to
acknowledge the newcomer and went about their buisness. "Honestly, you'd
think they'd recognize his own sister!" Looking down to her LCD friend,
she sighed, "At least you understand me."

	<beep! beep!> "I'm hungry, feed me! I'm hungry feed me!"

	"Your right Tama-home, there's not much time till he returns, I'd
better hurry if I wanna see what's up in fic-land." With that death and
glory spirit, Keener's sister fired up the old computer and connected
with the world of angst, spoofs, and self insertion. One day I'll be old
enough for Dark fics and Lemons too, she thought. 

	"Let's see, twenty four test messages asking if the list is up, thirty
responses to Keener's Important message..." She controlled the urge to
shiver, she had seen her brother on those dark nights and didn't like
the look in his eyes, "which I'll bet he'll try to answer everyone of
them, with or without sleep. Hmmmmmm, the continuing epic of Dynamic
reality versus Empirical Fact between Wyrm and Keener...BORING! Another
sick fic from Fcasper, WHICH my brother won't let me read. Awwwww, look
at all the guys who are leaving...Andrew Huang and Martin Pay, that's
sad, isn't it Tama-home?"

	<Beep! Beep!> "I'm Hungry, Feed Me, NOW! I'm Hungry, Feed Me, NOW!"

	"Your right, they'll be back. Let's see, new fics from Nickolas F.
Toledo and Time Runner, which he MUST C&C, and about twenty others that
get put in the haven't read files. Heh, I bet Keener's jealous. He can't
even finish that stupid suicide fic. Gary Kleepes got new fics to
review, I don't think my brother's gonna get much sleep tonight. Nothing
from JD though, I wonder what's up with him? And here's the word from
the Revengers, humph, how much longer till he makes a showing in that
project? I agree with Washu, they need someone to lend a hand, right
Tama-home?"

	<BEEP! BEEP!> "I'M HUNGRY, FEED ME OR DIE! I'M HUNGRY FEED ME OR DIE!

	"Your right I guess, no sense him makig a move till he knows exactly
what's going on. You know, I'm a bit surprised, I haven't seen hardly
any Spam. No Idea posts, no Question posts, granted you have the usual
'Is this thing on?' posts but I..." The young girls eyes slowly slid to
an unread mail from someone named Tybalt. 

	Slowly and with slightly moistening eyes, she read. "But-but, no.
Thi-this can't be happening. A moderator? With a Spam vendetta? NO! The
people of the FFML shall NOT starve and chip their teeth on pertinant
posts. They shall EAT of the mana of the Gecko-Kami!" With a defiant
gleam in her eyes, the young girl stood up majestically as a theme song
began its overture.

	"I can't forgive this! For the honor of the little black pigs who give
their lives to the meat grinder, to every beast that does crawlth upon
the feild and also end up in the can, I shall punish you! Pretty
Pathetic Plot Manipulation Factory Recall!" 
	
	The theme song (Spam by Weird Al) reached a feverous pitch as strands
of geletionous meat by-products swirled about her and her little
Tamagotchi too! When it was all over, she stood there in a slighlty
greasy fuku, with meat dumplings on either side of her head. Her
Tamagotchi had morphed into a massive chunck of unpalatable meat with
huge eyes and a gem of hardened ham embedded in it's forehead. They were
Pretty Spammy and her familiar, the Meat Mokona!

	<Blorp! Blorp!> "That's it, I'm getting my own damned food! That's it
I'm getting my own damned food!" Hopping...errrr Blorping away, the meat
gone bad went out the door and headed downstairs to the refrirator.

	"That's right, Meat Mokona, you stay out of harms way. I've got to
handle this alone! The sound of meat and grease bubbles poping flew from
the glowing hands of our heroine as her fingers danced over the keys." 

	She wrote questions and puzzlers, whyfores and befuddlers. 

	She wrote Ideas and Igotitz, erukas and herewhatitz. 
	
	Dodging the flames, she was on a mission, while downstairs her pet was
exploring the kitchen. 

	And in FFMLville they say, Tybalts waistline grew three sizes that day. 

	Exhusated and drained, the young girl was pooped, while downstairs the
Meat Mokona started Blorping, "My cage needs to be scooped!"

	Meanwhile, Keener walked though the front door of the house, mumbling
without a single rhyme. "Stupid Fu-kun, what do you mean I can't base my
Changeling Troll on Piccolo?" Still muttering, the tired hack author
walked wearily up the stairs. A near run in with one of his sisters made
him scowl. "Watch where your going."

	"Sorry Keener, got go check on Tama-home." The young girl spun around
her brother who couldn't help but wonder where the Spam Burger smell was
coming from. Sighing he walked on into his room and flipped on the
computer.

	Meanwhile Tybalt had already posted, a note to the Spammer to tell him
he was toasted. The post was quite clear and the reader got the gist.
"My God!" said Keener, "I've been booted off the list!"