Hi

Thanks for this comments and suggestion

I'll try to answer them...

Interesting premise...
 
A few things that I just DON'T get, though...
 
Another dude with a curse...? 

Not really, then again maybe so...I've tried to make his "perfectness" as
Eric McGinnis has said as his woe...

Shampoo and Ukyou seem to accept this a little too easily.

The letter? yeah I know...OOC, not really.  I just want them to mature
enough.

Shampoo accepts Mousse much too easily.

I don't know if I should stereotype...

Cologne doesn't have a Devious Plan to get Ranma back?

Well so far she's hasn't been successful...if you have one, tell me.

Why doesn't Soun want Akane to go to China?

Hmm...I thought of more negative points than positive.

You put something like [blinks] or [smiles] on every 
  line...You don't have to.

Maybe, I try to cut down...but some like the detail, some not. :-)

Shampoo, Ukyou and Akane become friends??

Nope, just trying to do the best of things. 

Ranma wants a cure...instead of, say, research, he decides to 
   walk through China?

I think it built up to that decision.

And where'd he get the money to go to China, anyhow?

Such details are...I felt unimportant, if you think otherwise I'll try to
fit it in the plot.

Why does Akane want to go to China?  To be with Ranma?  <How 
    would they find each other>

Well, one is Shampoo.  And since she's got lot of time at hand.
To find each other...well if you know were someone is going...the best
place to look is obvious..probably another reason for hesitation for her
father.

Neither Ukyou nor Nodoka seem like the fainting type.

My mistake, coz this fic is a prelude I'm building for a previous pic which
I have to rewrite. I've had 
little time to prepare the events.

Nabiki seems too emotional and not at all manipulative.

Her favorite subject is not around, anyway.  Again, I felt they need to
grow a little.
  

[looks out the window and sees a small black pig landing on 
the wing of the plane][blink] P-chan! 

Kicked from China to Japan?

Unbelievable, ne?
  

Cologne: [smiles] <I can see that you've improved a lot, grand nephew.>

 
Nephew??  I had thought that you had stated (repeatedly) that 
Cream was female...

Oops...I guess that's a boo-boo. Thanks for pointing it out.

While you've got quite a few good ideas, the characterization 
seem a bit too loose, and the writing doesn't quite seem to 
flow correctly...

Hai, writing sucks when your trying to do a prelude...your limited to the
events that
has to happen with a latter fic.

Terrence Marks
Remember-Jesus is your friend.
normal@grove.ufl.edu