And here's episode 14 of Mikado Ichiban. Barring any major
spelling/grammar/continuity errors people find, this is the final version.
-------------
[A small, neat office room, adorned with only a wooden desk, a few
chairs, and some papers on said desk. Sitting behind the desk is a
young, black-haired man, wearing the school uniform. The other chairs
are set in a semi-circle along the other side of the desk, and a
half-dozen other students are sitting down, waiting patiently.]
Boy behind the desk: I suppose you know why I've called you all here?
Boy #1: Not hard to guess, Suiko. It's nearing the end of the year,
after all..
Suiko: [Nodding] And you all know what that means, right?
[The students all nod back.]
Boy #2: A time for remembering things...
Boy #3: [Morosely] To study for exams...
Girl #1: And a time... For the student council election!
Suiko: [Smiling pleasantly] Exactly! Which brings up one important
thing..
Boy #2: And that is...?
Suiko: [Pulls out a sun fan from... somewhere...] How to get
re-elected, naturally!
Boy #3: That shouldn't be hard. We did a good job this time around,
didn't we?
Girl #2: It might not be as easy as you think..
[All the other students turn to look at the girl curiously.]
Girl #2: Sources tell me that Mikado's already been nominated...
[Collected groans. No one looks particularly pleased, except Suiko, who
has yet to lose his smile.]
Suiko: Just another hill to climb over folks! We can do this! [Suiko
beams on, while everyone else tries to look positive.] {By hook
or crook...}
------------------------------------------------------------------
[scene fades to black, theme music starts playing.]
[An series of images flash (to the drum beat of the theme song) on the
screen: first one of Mikado, then one of Azusa, followed by a group
picture of Phrank, Josie, Mikami, and Ryuuken. It flashes one more
time, showing a picture of Mikado being hounded by some fans as Chance
looks on in the background. It is replaced with a slow pan of Kolkhoz
High School, the sun sparkling in the background. Mikado skates by,
graceful and calm as a horde of females follow him. Josie is cheering
in the background, while Phank is sitting down, looking at her
wistfully. The scene changes to an ice rink, where Mikado and Azusa are
fighting against a large group of people. Noticeable characters are
Ranma, Ryuuken, Kazue, and Wakai. Azusa breaks off from the fight to
pick up a coin that was dropped on the ice, and all of the skaters
descend upon Mikado. This scene ends, and the camera opens on Mikado
posing. Azusa jumps onscreen, hugging on to him tightly. The animation
stops with Mikado trying to get away from Azusa, who is pulling at the
tie he is wearing. The music stops, and the screen fades to black.]
------------------------------------------------------------------
Mikado Ichiban: Zembun Otoko!
Episode 14: You've got my vote!
[Mikado's home room class, and the regular party is in full swing. The
teacher is asleep, Mikado is flirting with the women surrounding his
desk, and Josie is keeping a sharp eye on Phrank, who's eye occasionally
strays... but not for long. The door slides open, and Kureena Mitsuka
strides into the room. She scans the room, and makes a bee-line for
Mikado's desk.]
Kureena: Mikado.. Mikado Sanzenin! [Pushing through the throngs of
women, she manages to shove a microphone into Mikado's
face.] Mr. Sanzenin! Rumor has it that you've been nominated
for student council president by an unprecedented 20% of the
student population! What are your reactions?
Mikado: [Blinking under the verbal assault.] Student council
president... [His face goes white] As in, politics? [He
shudders a bit, as he quickly gets up.] Please excuse me for
a moment...
[Mikado is out of the room just about as fast as you can blink. Josie
and Phrank watch him go with some measure of curiosity.]
Josie: Think we should follow him?
Phrank: We always do... [Shrugs] Why stop now?
[They chase after Mikado, and Kureena is following close behind.]
Kureena: President Sanzenin! What's your opinion on the cafeteria
issue?
-=-
[In the men's washroom, Mikado is standing shakily. He looks a little
disturbed as he brushes his hair back, examining his reflection.]
Mikado: Me? President? The mere word 'politics' [Shudder] sends me into
convulsions...
Phrank: I guess that means you'll decline?
[Mikado turns around quickly, to see Phrank leaning against the wall
beside the door.]
Phrank: [Grins] Can't say I blame you. All that organization, the
meetings.. It'd be boring, that's for sure.
Mikado: It's not just that, It's the entire idea of... politics
[Shudder]... Such a horrible thing. Almost as frightening as m...
ma... mar.. m... [Straightens himself up] The 'M' word.
Phrank: The 'M' word?
Mikado: [stammering] Never mind!
Phrank: [Blinks] Uh, right. Anyways, it's not like it's a problem...
All you have to do is decline to run. You can't be FORCED into
the position...
Mikado: [Nodding, relief showing on his face] That's true...
Phrank: So all you have to do is tell the people who nominated you, why
you won't be running... [He claps Mikado on the shoulder, and
walks out of the bathroom, a grin firmly set on his face.]
[Mikado stands there for a few moments. He crosses his arms, and purses
his lips.]
Mikado: Feh. The great Sanzenin fears no man...
[With a look of supreme confidence, Mikado stides out of the bathroom.
Moments later, the entirety of the Mikado Sanzenin Fan Club (tm) have
assebled around him.]
Fan #1: Oh Mikado, isn't it so wonderful?
Fan #2: We all nominated you! You'll win for sure!!
Kureena: Mr. President! Do you have anything to say now?
[Mikado stands there, a morose look on his face, whilst getting mobbed by
his adoring fans.]
Mikado: {My fans, on the other hand...}
-=-
[Cut to the Kolkhoz hallways, just after the first class has ended.]
Boy 1: Hey, did you hear the news, Mikado's been nominated for school
president...
Boy 2: Great, just what we need, Mikado, having political power as
well as physical..
Boy 3: I can imagine the school rules -he'd- come up with..
[In another pocket of the hallway..]
Girl 1: Can you imagine it? Mikado as our school president!
Girl 2: He can give me orders ANY day...
[Some laughing and giggling ensues, but one student nearby doesn't join
in...]
Hojo: {I do not like the sounds of this...}
[Hojo dashes off down the hallway, passing by another group of
students..]
Kazue: WHAT? Mikado as president? We'd never see the arena again!
SC member: Yeah, we're as good as doomed..
Kazue: Hmm.. Not quite yet. He has to get elected, still....
SC member: Oh no... You have a plan, don't you?
Kazue: Damn right I do!
[The SC member can be seen making a few prayers as Kazue's back is
turned.]
-=-
[Cut to one of the classrooms, where a teacher drones on to a largely
mentally numbed class. Near the back of the class, Hojo, Gato and
Makimura are talking in hushed tones.]
Hojo: I swear man, if Mikado becomes president, that's the end of any
chance with with women around here, period.
Makimura: Bummer.
Gato: Yeah, but we graduate in a few weeks. Who cares?
Hojo: It's the principle of it.. I mean, we can't let him take over.
Where's your pride in the future of your school?
Teacher: Perhaps, Mr. Hojo, your school spirit could be focused towards
some club, instead of interrupting my class?
[Hojo turns around, looking straight into the face of his teacher.]
Hojo: Heh. Uhh, hi. Water buckets?
Teacher: [Nodding] Water buckets.
-=-
[At the end of class, Chance walks out of the classroom, and over to
where Hojo is standing, still holding up the water buckets.]
Hojo: Heh. Few more weeks of this, and I'll be strong enough to just
take on Mikado..
Chance: Or graduated, take your pick. What was it you were worked up
about this time?
Hojo: Didn't you hear? Mikado's been nominated to run for student
council president. He's practically assured.. We've got to
do SOMETHING about it!
Chance: Hmm. Yes, we do...
Hojo: Then you'll help?
Chance: [Smiling] In my own little way.
-=-
[At Arc Nova, Chance's base of operations, Hudson and Ferro are intently
studying a computer screen.]
Hudson: A bit more...
Ferro: Come on...
[Cut to a close-up of the screen, where two digital fighters are duking
it out against each other.]
Ferro: Tiger slash! Yeah!
[The game flashes, as one of the combatants is knocked out. Hudson
smacks his keyboard in frustration.]
Hudson: Aw, one more hit and you would've been toast!
Drake: Hard at work gentlemen?
[Both Ferro and Hudson go stiff, and then leap out of their chairs.
They turn to face Drake, and salute.]
Ferro: Just indulging in a little.. Uhh...
Hudson: In-depth study of hand-to-hand combat, sir!
Ferro: Yeah, what he said. Sir.
Drake: [Shaking his head] At ease.
[The two relax a bit, Hudson grinning a bit goofily.]
Drake: We've got a mission for you boys.. Well, all of us, really. How
well do you recall your 'Election Rigging 101' class?
Ferro: Like it was yesterday, sir. [Hopefully] Do we get to set up
some new members to the Diet?
Drake: No, we're getting Mikado elected to student council.
[Ferro's face falls. To the floor.]
Ferro: Oh.
-=-
[Back at Kolkhoz High, where lunch break has just begun. Wakai Kodomo
is walking casually around campus, whistling a tune, and generally just
passing the time away. Things seem to be calm, until Kazue suddenly
appears right in front of Wakai, staring into his face.]
Wakai: Woah!
Kazue: We need to talk.
Wakai: About what?
Kazue: Why, your being nominated for student council president, of
course...
-=-
[Cut to the principal's office, where Principal Hajinai is slowly going
over some documents. There is a knock at his door.]
Hajinai: Come in.
[The door opens, and Suiko enters quickly.]
Hajinai: Ah, Jurrui Suiko! Just the man I wanted to see.
Suiko: I got here as quickly as I could, sir. What is it you wanted to
talk about?
Hajinai: It's about your re-election, Suiko. It doesn't seem to be as
assured as it was a few days ago, was it?
Suiko: Well no sir, I wasn't expecting..
Hajinai: No, you weren't expecting Mikado to enter the race, did you?
It's put a serious dent in my plans..
Suiko: You mean, 'our' plans, don't you?
Hajinai: I mean what I say. You're the one that owes ME a favour here.
I don't owe you anything.
Suiko: Yes sir..
Hajinai: [Pleasantly] Which isn't to say, once your debts to me are
cleared, you won't be paid handsomely!
Suiko: [Grinning savagely] It's why I'm here, sir.
Hajinai: Indeed it is. Well then, why don't we think of some ways to
neturalize this threat, then? It'd be far too unprofitable if
you lost..
-=-
[Cut to a small clearing on school grounds. Mikado is laying on the
ground, staring up into the sky. Phrank and Josie are seated nearby.]
Phrank: C'mon Mikado, what's so wrong with the idea? Just think about
it; more power!
Josie: You're a cinch to win anyways, you might as well get used to it..
Phrank: You could impose new rules! Install a 'kiss Phrank' day...
[Notices nasty glares from Josie's direction] Aheh,
nevermind..
Mikado: [Shakes his head] You don't seem to understand.. Politics go
against my moral principles..
Phrank: [Blinks] You have morals?
[Josie pokes Phrank, while Mikado simply grins.]
Mikado: Of course I do. They might, however, be a little above your
understanding..
Phrank: [Grins back] Oh yes, how could I EVER hope to be as wise as the
oh-so-honorable Sanzenin-sama?
[Mikado smirks, but only for a moment.]
Mikado: But I DO need to find a way out of this.. If only for the sake
of my fans.. Between skating -and- [Shudder] politics, how would
I ever find the time for them?
Josie: [Rolls her eyes] I'm sure you'd get by.
Mikado: [Ponders a bit more] It'll, ah... cut into my skating practice
time?
Josie: Not this excuse again...
-=-
[Cut to Koichi's office, where the coach is sitting meditatively at his
desk. Incense burns on his table, and Koichi looks very relaxed. He
might have even stayed this way, were his office door not open.]
Girl #1: Okay, hang it right over here...
Girl #2: A little higher, don't you think?
[Koichi's mouth twitches.]
Girl #3: No, then no one'd see it!
Girl #1: I'm still not sure it's straight...
Koichi: [A dark mood crossing his face] {Can a man not work in peace
around here?} [Stands up, and goes to his door] What is it
you women think is so important as to disturb my meditations?
[In the hall outside his office, the three girls are setting up a giant
poster. It reads 'Mikado for president - He's the man!', and features a
picture of his face. Koichi's face hardens.]
Koichi: I see.. Never mind, ladies..
[Koichi turns back into his office, closing the door behind him.]
Koichi: {Blast it, that boy should learn to focus his
responsibilities...!}
-=-
[Cut back to the clearing. Mikado is now up to his feet, and about to
head off.]
Mikado: It's not an excuse this time; I really do need to prepare.
Phrank: Prepare? For what?
Mikado: Another election, of sorts.. Next week, before final exams,
Koichi intends to hold a competition to determine who will be
the club captain for the next year.
Phrank: Woah. Two guesses what Ryuuken's up to right now.
Mikado: [Nods] Exactly why I should be off.
[Mikado turns to go, but just at that moment, Kureena pops out of some
bushes.]
Kureena: President Sanzenin!
[Mikado leaps back, startled.]
Mikado: [Calming down] Can't you simply walk up to people?
Kureena: [Pushes right up against Mikado] President Sanzenin, what are
your thoughts on the role of the school newspaper?
Mikado: [Takes a step back] Will you stop calling me president?
Kureena: Will you answer the question, please?
[Kureena whips out a tape recorder, jamming it in Mikado's direction.
Moments later, it is plucked out of the air by a pair of hands.]
Chance: [Holding up the recorder] Mr. Sanzenin has no comment at this
time.
[Chance tosses the recorder back to Kureena]
Chance: You should know where to go for your questions..
Kureena: [Pouts] Well, you can't blame a reporter to try and get the
news first!
[Kureena walks off in a huff, leaving Mikado looking at Chance
strangely.]
Mikado: 'You know where to go'...?
Chance: Well, the press conference announcing your running for
president, naturally.
Mikado: [Goes white] You didn't...
Chance: Organize it for you? Of course I did. It's what I'm paid for,
right? Hudson's writing your speech, Ferro's working on the
lighting... I even got Drake to make some wicked campaign
posters...
Josie: [Cautiously] Chance... You -did- ask Mikado if he wanted to run
first, didn't you?
Chance: What? Well, if he didn't want to run, he wouldn't have been
nominated, right? [Silence] ....Right?
[Chance looks between the three faces in front of him, and starts to
frown.]
Chance: Oh. Boy.
------------------------------------------------------------------
[Ad break. A picture of an SD Mikado, running away from a giant ballot
box.]
[Fade in on a view of Earth from deep space.]
J. E. Jones: For the longest time, there has been one question people
have wanted an answer to.
[The camera zooms in, descending towards and then into the atmosphere,
flying past and through clouds.]
J. E. Jones: It is for that reason that September 15th, 1997 will be a
special day in history.
[Our POV zooms in on Japan.]
J. E. Jones: For it is the day...
[Just as an overhead view of Tokyo fills the screen, the scene shatters,
revealing a new scene: [Outside Ucchan's. Ukyou is keeping several
Wasps at bay with her combat spatula; others lie fallen all around. As
she hits a home run on one of the things the scene blips to...
[Somewhere in the Japanese countryside. A midsized military
installation is alive with activity. The camera follows a Blackhawk as
it alights upon one of several pads, then zooms in as its cabin door
slides open. Out of it, escorted by Ferro and Deitrich, steps Mikado.
[Nekohanten interior. Cologne is hopping about, dodging bursts from a
Trooper's gun as several Fighters mob Shampoo. As an enraged Mousse
leaps into that fray, the scene snaps to...
[Somewhere in Tokyo. Ryoga is facing off against a trio of Hulks. As
he looses a shishihokoudan at the closest one, the scene snaps again.
[Kuno estate grounds, where Chance and Kodachi are inflicting merry hell
upon their uninvited guests, as the still forms of Troopers and the odd
Hunter amply show; he with a ninja-to and an H&K MP5, she with her
trademark ribbon and clubs. The scene freezes as they double-team a
luckless Hunter.]
J. E. Jones: ...on which that question is answered.
[The scene fades to black, then the following fades in, centered
onscreen, identical in style to the titles on the game boxes:
M A R A T H O N 1 / 2
Enough Pfhorplay
Another project not brought to you by the YRN.
------------------------------------------------------------------
[Open to a small office; the same room where Suiko and his fellow
council members had met. This time, Suiko is the only one in the room.
He stands by a window, looking down on the school courtyard.]
Suiko: Sanzenin.. You will not disturb my plans. The position of
student council president is mine! It is from this position that
I will milk this school for all it's worth, and enter the 'real'
world a rich man!!
[Suiko breaks out into laughter. This isn't normal laughter, this is
the heartless, cold, insane kind of laughter that might make Kodachi
have a hard time sleeping at night. He continues to laugh for some
time, but stops immediately upon hearing a knock at the door. He coughs
into a hand, and puts a happy expression.]
Suiko: [Pleasantly] Come in.
[Kureena enters the room, tape recorder in hand, smiling eagerly.]
Kureena: I'm so happy you agreed to let me interview you, Mr. Suiko!
Suiko: It is my pleasure, Ms. Mitsuka. Please, won't you sit down?
Kureena: Certainly! [Sits down casually in a chair] So, I guess the
best way to start off, is to ask - why are you running for the
position of student council president?
Suiko: [Nodding] I can certainly agree that it's a good question. [Sits
down in his own chair, ponders for a few moments] Obviously, I'm
here because I want to make a difference. {To my bank account}
I think, from this position, I can help make this school a better
place..
Kureena: I see.. and would be the first thing you'd do, upon regaining
the position?
Suiko: Hmm, another good question. I was thinking, actually, that the
Journalism Club could do with a bit more funding; something to
help those budding young reporters realize their dreams..
Kureena: [Wide-eyed] Really?
Suiko: Oh definately. It's very high on my agenda... Unlike certain
-other- candidates...
[Kureena sits back, a ponderous look on her face, while Suiko hides a
grin behind a hand.]
-=-
[Back in the clearing, Mikado has grabbed Chance by the shirt, and is
shaking him lightly.]
Mikado: I'm at wit's end here! Whatever gave you the idea I WANTED to
be a part of this?
Chance: [Removing Mikado's hands] Well, for one, I figured you'd be too
concerned about your fan's feelings to not run. If you haven't
noticed, your hordes are more excited than usual lately.
Mikado: But, I.... [Sighs] Hate it when you're right.
Chance: Besides which, just because you're accepting to run, [Looks
quickly over at Phrank] Doesn't necessarily mean you have to be
giving the speech.
[Mikado looks confused for a few moments, and then realization dawns on
his face. Both Mikado and Chance turn to Phrank.]
Phrank: [Looking rather nervous] What?
Chance: [Putting an arm around Phrank's shoulder] Say Phrank, -buddy-,
remeber the clause we put into that agreement about never
impersonating Mikado..?
[Chance walks off, taking Phrank with him, leaving Mikado and Josie
alone in the clearing.]
Josie: This doesn't mean he's going to take your place, does it?
Mikado: Actually, yes it does. [Smiles] Why don't you go cheer
'Mikado' on? I'm sure it could help..
Josie: I thought you didn't want to become president?
Mikado: I don't. [Sighs] But if I'm forced to run on account of
the wishes of my fans, I should maintain my record of never
having been defeated!
[Josie looks like she's abvout to say something, but thinks better of
it.]
Josie: [Shaking her head] I guess I better go cheer for 'you', then..
Mikado: [Bows] It would be greatly appreciated.
Josie: [Smirks] Of course. See you later, Mikado..
[Josie walks off in the direction Chance and Phrank left.]
Mikado: Meanwhile, I have an competition of real consequence to prepare
for..
[Mikado walks off in the direction of the ice rink.]
-=-
[Cut to the interior of the ice rink, where Ryuuken is practicing some
skating maneuvers. Ryuuken is sweating profusely. Watching him from
the sidelines is Hirotaka.]
Hirotaka: Ryuuken man, don't kill yourself. You've been doing those
power laps for an hour now..
Ryuuken: [Comes to a quick stop in front of Hirotaka] I'm preparing for
the team captain selection, if you don't mind.
Hirotaka: [Raises his hands to the air] Woah-ho, not trying to offend
you here, but don't you think you're taking this a little too
seriously?
Ryuuken: [Sneers] Better than I can say for that Sanzenin! While he
runs around for that school election, -I'll- be here practicing.
I deserve the team captain title.. And I'm going to PROVE it
in a weeks' time..
Hirotaka: [Shrugs] Whatever you like. [Gets up] Just don't overdo it,
'k? Captain or not, I like having a live Ryuuken around..
Ryuuken: [Smiles] You'll get both.
[Hirotaka shakes his head and walks off, while Ryuuken starts skating
again. Unseen by both is Koichi, who has been watching the events with
a stony expression on his face.]
Koichi: {Ryuuken has the drive... But not the love..} [Koichi looks to
the ceiling of the building with a pained expression on his
face.] {Sanzenin, don't make me make a decision like this..}
-=-
[Cut to the stands of the ice rinks. Mikado has just walked into the
arena, and sees Ryuuken already skating on the ice. He watches
for a few moments, and then turns to leave.]
Mikado: {If I skate in the open, people might catch on that I'm not actually
the one making that acceptance speech.. I only hope Koichi doesn't
get too worked up over this..}
[Mikado exits the rink, cut to the gates leaving the school grounds.
Mikado walks past them, pausing for a moment to look back at the school.]
Mikado: Hopefully this debacle doesn't last long..
-=-
[Cut to the school gymnasium, where a podium and speakers have been set up.
Students mill into the area, mostly females, and most of them being members
of Mikado's fan club. Chance and Phrank and behind a set of drapes, where
Chance is prepping Phrank for his speech. In front of the podium, Hudson
is talking to the cheerleading squad, which is all there, wearing 'Mikado
for 96-97!' t-shirts.]
Hudson: Okay, our strongest voter base is the Mikado fan club; we've already
got them lock, stock and barrel. What we need is to attract voters
from the rest of the school population. I'd like you girls to
perform outside the entrance to the gym, and try and get the
attention of the male voters.. [Excitably] Don't forget to show a
lot of skin!!
[Josie and a few of the other cheerleaders hammer him into the ground
simultaneously.]
Josie: We can do our job just -FINE- without your help.. Hmph, 'show some
skin'... Pervert.
[They exit through the main doors, and catcalls and whistling immediately
start up.]
Boy: Woo hoo!
Boy2: All right, baby!!
[Sounds of unimaginable violence can be heard, as well as many screams of
pain. Josie and the other cheerleaders storm back into the gym soon after.
Drake approaches them curiously.]
Drake: Why aren't you outside attracting more voters?
Josie: That portion of the student body, we can do without.
[Irregardless, some bruised and battered (and some not) male students start
milling into the room. Most of them leer at Josie and co. in their shirts
and short skirts. Josie does not look terribly impressed.]
Josie: They are SO depraved....
-=-
[Behind the drapes, Chance is finishing up going over Phrank's speech.]
Chance: Okay, and at the end, be sure to give them a big smile. Mikado
tells me that his 'loving fans adore it so much'...
Phrank: Uh, sure...
Chance: Okay, now.. Give me those glasses.
Phrank: What?
Chance: Can't very well go out there looking like Phrank, can you?
Phrank: I guess not, but...
[Chance reaches over, and grabs Phrank's glasses, and hands him a
copy of his speech.]
Chance: Don't worry. Just read the speech, show them your pearly
whites, and we'll get you out of here. I don't think we
could keep up the charade of you as Mikado for the whole
campaign anyways.
Phrank: [squints at his speech] Uh, one problem with this
whole thing...
Chance: Hmm? What's that?
Phrank: Well, it never came up last time we did the 'switcheroo'..
but I can't actually -read- without my glasses.
Chance: Ah. I see. [Pause. Suddenly, Chance reaches out,
grabs Phrank by the shirt, and starts shaking him.] You
COULD have told me this -sooner-!!
Drake: [Pops his head through the drapes] Guys! The speech starts in
one min... [Notices that Chance is currently trying to
throttle Phrank] There isn't a problem... is there?
[Chance opens his mouth, but is cut off by a mike test up front.]
Josie: Okay folks, do you know what we're all here for?
Male students: [well, most of them] BABES!!!
[The sound of a million hammers falling....]
Male students: [Pained] And to hear Mikado speak...
Josie: [Continuing on happily] That's right! So lets give a big
welcome to our future school council president, current
skating champion, and all-around greatest guy in Kolkhoz,
Mikado Sanzenin!!!
Chance: [Lets go of Phrank, returning to a calm demeanor.] I HOPE you
memorized that speech... [GLARES at Phrank]
Phrank: [Looking only slightly nervous] Heh. I had a whole five minutes.
Of course I memorized all four pages...
[Phrank walks out through the drapes, to the cheers (some estatic, others
half-hearted) from the crowd. He has that certain winning-yet-nervous
smile on his face, and waves at the students.]
Phrank: {I KNEW I should've gotten contact lenses...}
[Phrank steps up to the microphone, taking over from Josie, who is
still trying to whip the crowd up into excitement. He pats Josie on
the back, who turns around and gives him a hug in return.]
Josie: [Kissing Phrank on the cheek.] Knock 'em dead, 'Mikado'!!
[Phrank just stands there a few moments, dazed, while Josie jumps down
from the podium. Finally, Phranks eyes come back into focus. He sets
the speech down on the podium, organizing and peering at them for a few
moments. He stands up straight, and sees Josie dancing around, waving
her pom-poms around. Phrank picks up his speech, and tosses it up into
the air. Pages flutter down around him as he starts speaking.]
Phrank: Fellow school members, I come to you for one reason, and
one reason only...
[Phrank's voice fades out, as we cut to the shocked faces of Hudson,
Drake and Chance, all now behind the screen.]
Drake: What is he doing?
Chance: That's not the speech you wrote, is it?
[Chance and co listen for a few moments, while Phrank continues
to speak]
Phrank: [Off-screen] No, I did not come here to read some pre-doctored
speech, I came here to tell you, simply and plainly, that I am
the man for you!
[Squeals and cheers can be heard, as Chance and go begin to look more
ponderous.]
Hudson: Nope, it isn't... But I think it might actually be better.
[Chance raises a curious eyebrow, as the camera switches back to the
rest of the gym.]
Phrank: ....And in summation, I am here for -you-, the students. I come
here today to announce my candidacy, for the glory of us all, for
the glory of Kolkhoz High!!
[Students leap to their feet, clapping and cheering. Josie has a bit of a
stunned expression for a while, but then joins in the cheers. Phrank has
a bit of a stunned expression on himself.]
Student: All right Mikado! He's the man! Who cares if my girlfriend dumped
me for him?
Student 2: He's so hunky! I'd vote for him any day!
[At the back of the gym, two people aren't cheering, nor do they look happy
at all. One of them is Suiko, and the other is another one of the female
members of the student council.]
Suiko: I'm afraid our opponent here has a good potential of possibly being a
problem.
Aide: I was afraid this might happen... If you don't win, I won't be part
of the student council, will I?
Suiko: The president does choose all the rest of the members.. There's no
guarantees. [Sighs, and then smiles brightly] But, that's only
one hill to climb over! At least there aren't any other competitors
to worry about!
[Suddenly, a microphone squeals, painfully, and dies. The students look
around for the source in confusion.]
Kazue: Not so fast!!
[All attention switches to the source of the voice, Kazue, who jumps on top
of the speaker system, holding the electric wires that kept the
mike systems operational.]
Kazue: I'm here to announce that there's a third option in this election!
[A sucession of scene changes, close-ups of every talking student's face.]
Phrank: [Looking confused] Huh?
Chance: [Frowning] Shut that kid up...
Josie: Another candidate?
[The camera cuts to Suiko and his aide. Suiko has an expression of pure
rage on his face, until his aide turns to face him. Immediately, he is
his happy self again.]
Aide: 'Only one mountain?'
Suiko: [Straining to keep a pleasant smile] Well, maybe two.. Still,
it's no problem.... {Dammit dammit dammit...}
[Cut back over to Kazue, who is pulling Wakai out from a corner.]
Kazue: Your future... president... and leader... of the Student Council..
[Whispers] Get OUT here...
Wakai: [Stuggling] I don't want to run!
Kazue: [Whipsering] We've got no... [Finally gets a good hold on him.]
choice...!
[Kazue finally drags Wakai up onto the speaker, who looks generally
resentful at being there.]
Kazue: [Proudly] Wakai Kodomo! [Silence from the crowds] Well guys, wouldn't
you want to vote for this kid?
[The students begin to murmur among themselves.. 'Who is that kid?'
'Isn't he a little young to be in high school?' 'He's not half as cute as
Mikado' 'He IS kinda cute, though...' Kazue watches them chatter among
themselves, at a loss for words.]
Wakai: [Whispering] Well, your plan sure worked well...
Kazue: [Narrowing his eyes] Shut up..
[At the back of the gym, Suiko's aide looks visibly relieved.]
Aide: Well, that candidate's just a joke. Nothing to worry about, right
Suiko?
[The aide takes a claser look at Suiko, who's trying desperately to
keep a happy expression on his face. His eyes and mouth begin to
twitch.]
Suiko: Right! No problem at all... {For Mikado... But they could
conceivably put a dent into -my- voters..}
[Cut to Chance and co, who are all looking visibly relieved.]
Drake: Oh NO. The swimming club's offering a candidate...
Hudson: [Sniggering] Guess we better give up now!
Chance: [Arms crossed, he breaks into a grin.] Okay, maybe that
was a false alarm... [Ponders a few moments.] But wherever
Kazue goes, violence usually isn't that far behind...
-=-
[Ad break. A picture of an SD Mikado, running away from a giant ballot
box.]
[A still image from the top of Tokyo Tower, overlooking the north of Tokyo.]
Announcer: Tokyo. Long has this city been plagued by all sorts of disasters.
Be they natural or unnatural, the city is a constant source of dangers. It
needs a hero. Now, Tokyo has it's heroes, whether it wants them or not...
[Pan down a level, and Kuno Tatewaki, dressed in clothes that look like some
cross between kendo garb and tights, standing with his arms crossed, a wind
blowing across his hair.]
Kuno: Fear not, oh majestic city! I, the Stick, shall protect you!!
[The Stick leaps from his point on the tower, as lightning crashes in the
distance. He lands in a heap at the bottom of the tower, but is up
instantaneously.]
The Stick: [Laughs] The Stick cannot be brought down by mere gravity!
Physics, I laugh at thee!!
[The Stick whips out his stick, and rushes through a throng of people.]
Announcer: Protecting Tokyo from it's greatest threats...
The Stick: Ruffian! Unhand that fair maiden!!
Announcer: ..Or just people moving in on his territory.
Stupid Superhero Ideas, Inc. Presents...
THE STICK
coming to you never, by YRN
-=-
[The scene opens with an overhead view of a small ice rink. There are
no stands, just a simple exit to one side, and a rounded, window ceiling.
Mikado is on the ice, skating about without any cares, flowing
majestically as he glides about the ice. Suddenly, he does a forward
flip, and performs a series of rapid punches. He leaps into the air,
spinning at a dizzying rate. He lands, and stops spinning almost
instantaneously. He does a backflip, and performs a forward sweep.
Immediately afterwards, he pushes himself backwards on the ice,
and performs a solo 'dance of death'. Twenty seconds later, as
he's still performing the move, a beeping noise is heard. Mikado
blinks, and slows down his spinning. He stops, staring across
the rink at his pager, which is going off. He skates over to it,
and checks the message. With a startled expression, he rushes
outside, and then down a short path leading to his house.
Cut to Mikado leaping at a phone and dialing a number. After
two rings, the line picks up.]
Mikado: Hello, Chance? You called?
-=-
[The scene cuts to Chance, in one of the school hallways,
holding a black cell phone. Behind him, throngs of fans are
trying to get past Hudson, Drake and Ferro. Phrank can be seen
just dissapearing through a door at the end of the hallway.]
Chance: Phrank's done his job. the speech went over fairly
smoothly...
[Behind him, the Mikado fans have given up on trying to get
past the guards, and have all rushed down an alternate
hallway. Drake and Hudson go in pursuit, while Ferro
remains behind, watching Chance.]
Mikado: [Over the phone] So it went well?
Chance: Just one hitch, it might count as two... First,
Kazue announced that he's running that fellow club member
of his, Wakai Kodomo.
Mikado: Wakai is running...?
Chance: Key phrase: 'Kazue announced that he's running that fellow
club member of his'. Who, I should point out, does not seem
too pleased with the idea. [Mikado sighs near-imperceptibly]
That situation is being monitored. Anyway, you now have a
solid voter base - we owe Phrank one for that speech of his...
Mikado: 'His'?
Chance: Yes, his. Short form: you're here for your fellow students,
not to mention the glory of Kolkhoz High. Oh, on a
related note, Phrank is no longer helping us.
Mikado: What?!
Chance: Said something about being allergic to physical pain...
Anyways, you've got an interview scheduled for twenty
minutes from now. I really think you should get back to
the school.
Mikado: ....
Chance: Boss?
Mikado: [Sighs] Fine, fine, I'll be there...
[Mikado hangs up, and Chance puts away his phone. He looks over,
and notices that Ferro is still there, staring at him.]
Chance: Problem?
Ferro: Quite the opposite, really. I forgot to mention this
earlier, since you were so busy getting this shindig
prepared. Remember those files you wanted on that woman
in leotards who attacked you a while back?
Chance: When Hudson and I were scouting the Tendo residence. Yes?
Ferro: Just dug up some info, thought you might be interested..
[Ferro hands Chance some papers, and strides off in the direction
the Mikado fans went. Chance stands there, mulling over the
information.]
Chance: {Kodachi Kuno.. So that's her name..}
-=-
[Cut to the school entrance, where Mikado is looking around
cautiously, making sure no one can see him. Confident that
no one is around, he rushes into the school grounds, making a b-line
for the school arena.]
Kureena: [from off-screen] Ahem!
[Mikado freezes, and turns around, to see Kureena Mitsuka,
camcorder in hand, and holding a microphone out expectantly.]
Kureena: Mr. Sanzenin, would you care to comment on your position
regarding the school paper, now?
Mikado: [Realizes that there's no way out of this, he stands up
straight and confident.] My position on the school paper?
Hmm, well, I consider them to be an important group, bringing
vital information to the public...
Kureena: Yes, but what about giving them more funding?
Mikado: More funding? [Looks at the expensive-looking camcorder]
You aren't well supplied as is?
Kureena: Tha.. That's not the issue!
Mikado: The issue is, whether I'm willing to buy your votes?
[Kureena looks speechless. Mikado simply turns around, and
starts off once more for the arena.]
Mikado: Good day, Miss Mitsuka. I shall have to talk to you
further, once I've conferred with my people.
[Mikado walks off. Kureena continues to look a little baffled.
Finally she shakes off her shock, and clenches a fist.]
Kureena: He may be the best talent our school has produced..
But -no one- insults the integrity of Kureena Mitsuka,
and survives with an intact reputation!!
[Closer to the rink, Mikado is smoothing out his clothes, and
looking rather happy with himself.]
Mikado: I was FAR too good at that...
-=-
[In a small tree nearby, Phrank watches Mikado as he enters
the arena. He has a bit of a pained expression on his face.]
Phrank: [Touching his cheek absently] The first time she
kissed me, and it was when I was pretending to be
you. [Hugs his knees] Would she have done that if I
wasn't trying to be you at the time, Mikado..?
[Phrank sighs, and leans back on the tree branch.]
Phrank: Makes sense I guess; she's a cheerleader, and I'm
just a guy who isn't in any clubs. Maybe if she had
something to cheer -me- on in...
[Phrank gets a thoughtful look to his face, and jumps out
of the tree. He lands a little ungracefully, falling to
his hands and kness.]
Phrank: [Grins] Feh. Something that doesn't involve
heights.
-=-
[Cut to the skating rink entrance. Mikado steps out of his
change room, and finishes lacing up his skates. Before he
gets to the ice, he sees Koichi sitting in a chair near the
entrance doors.]
Koichi: [Turned away from Mikado] It's about time you showed
up.
Mikado: [Walks over and sits beside Koichi] My fans deemed
that I had other concerns to attend to.
Koichi: Your 'fans'... Mikado, did you ever consider that
you need them less than you need practice?
Mikado: Without them, I would not be nearly as well established
as I am..
Koichi: You mean wealthy. Sanzenin, those ridiculous females
that pander to you couldn't care less if you were a
chess player! Hormones guide them, not any respect for
skating.
Mikado: Nontheless, they are the ones that make our skating
program possible. Ticket sales to events are what keep
the classes afloat..
Koichi: It's sad to see.
Mikado: Hmm?
Koichi: Just how much Hajinai has affected your thinking. I
only wish I had been your first coach.
Mikado: You are certainly my best.
Koichi: Flattery doesn't become you, Sanzenin. I am not worried
about your talent, but your soul...
[Mikado doesn't seem to know how to react. The silence hangs in
the air for a few moments.]
Koichi: [Staring ahead to the ice] So, it's probably best
if you leave.
Mikado: [Startled] What?!
Koichi: If your fans mean so much to you, go to them. I
don't want to see you until the competition.
Mikado: But....
Koichi: -Go-.
[Mikado, still shaken, gets up and leaves. Koichi keeps on
staring ahead until he is gone. He then sighs, slumping
back into his chair.]
Koichi: {This is a decision you have to make yourself, Mikado..
I can only pray you make the right one...}
-=-
[Cut to a class room in Kolkhoz, emptied of desks. A banner
reads 'Mikado for Prez'. Chance, Hudson, Drake and Ferro
are the only people around, accessing computer info, and
organizing flyers, etc. Mikado walks in, still looking
at a loss for words. Chance sees Mikado, and walks up to
him.]
Chance: Good afternoon sir. Did you catch the interview?
Mikado: [Blankly] Ms. Mitsuka?
Chance: That'd be the one.
Mikado: I suppose you could say that.
Chance: [Looks curious, but doesn't say a thing] Anyways,
that's all that was really necessary. Guess you
might as well attend class while you're here.
Mikado: It might be an idea, at that..
[Mikado walks out of the room, Chance looking concerned
as he leaves.]
Chance: What's gotten into him...
-=-
[In Hajinai's office, Suiko is pacing around the room nervously,
while Hajinai sits in his chair ponderously.]
Hajinai: So, I would guess that your little news sabotage
didn't pan out as you expected?
Suiko: No, in fact it didn't. And then we've also got this
new candidate.
Hajinai: I'm sure he won't be that much of a problem..
Suiko: The only votes he could attract, are from people who
would have otherwise voted for me. Mikado's voters
are guaranteed to be a dedicated block.
Hajinai: [Nods] But of course, if Mikado was out of the
running, there'd be no problem, right?
Suiko: Yes, but that'd be...
Hajinai: Impossible? That's why you're in your bind, and
I'm the one that helped you. Now, I -do- have an
idea to get Mikado out of race. A rather blissfully
simple one, really.
Suiko: [With extreme dread] How much will it cost me?
Hajinai: You? Oh, nothing. As I've pointed out, you
are rather important to me.. Consider this one a
freebie!
Suiko: [Narrows his eyes] This situation makes you nervous,
doesn't it?
Hajinai: [Nods vigourously] Extremely. And I don't like
that. [Picks up a microphone for the school PA
system, and turns it on] Would Sanzenin Mikado please
report to the principal's office immediately?
-=-
[Mikado looks up at the PA system curiously, and gets
up from his desk. After being excused by the teacher,
he leaves the class and heads for the principal's
office.]
-=-
[At the campaign HQ, Hudson is listening to something
through a pair of headphones. He jumps up when the
PA system stops.]
Hudson: Woah... Boss!
[Chance turns around, a look of impatience on his
face.]
Chance: Yes?
Hudson: Remember how you said it'd be a good idea to keep
tabs on Suiko...?
-=-
[Mikado walks into Hajinai's office. Suiko is gone, and
Hajinai sits at his desk, with a casual smile.]
Mikado: You called..?
Hajinai: [Nodding] Yes, yes I did, Mikado. Sit down, I
wanted to talk to you about a few things.
Mikado: [Sitting down] Such as...?
Hajinai: This election. I was rather suprised to hear that
you were running.
Mikado: [Frowns] Well, my fans didn't exactly leave me with
much choice...
Hajinai: [Nods] Of course, of course.. You couldn't have them
think you were refuting them, could you?
Mikado: [A little confused] Well, of course not.. Principal, if
I may ask, why are you asking me these questions?
Hajinai: Mikado, Mikado, Mikado.. I ask, because it's a
school function. And goodness knows I like those to
run smoothly!
Mikado: [Dubiously] I guess so.
Hajinai: [Casually] And heavens, it just wouldn't be smooth
running if there were scheduling conflicts..
Mikado: Pardon?
Hajinai: Well, it's just one of those accidental things, you
see, but that little competition Koichi has lined up for
your club, it just happens to be the same time and day
of the student council voting...
Mikado: Meaning...?
Hajinai: Well, election rules stipulate that the winning
candidate must be there to accept his position. You
know, to symbolically show that he's serious in his will
to lead, and sacrifice other needs for it.
Mikado: [Blinks] And there's no way around that?
Hajinai: I'm afraid not.
Mikado: So essentially, I have to decide between running in this
election, or maintaining the skating club captaincy?
Hajinai: That about wraps it up.
Mikado: [Breathing a sigh of relief] Well, that solves a few
problems!
Hajinai: Hmm?
Mikado: With such a barrier, I could not continue in this
election at all. Principal, I officially ask to be
taken out of the running of this election!
[Mikado stands up, bows, and leaves the room.]
Hajinai: {That was almost too easy... there's no fun in it if they
don't squirm..} [Sits back in his chair, and grins]
Ahwell, got what I wanted!
-=-
[Mikado rushes down a hallway towards his 'campaign room', a
smirk firmly set on his face.]
Mikado: {Surely my fans will understand I could not run under
these conditions... I can withdraw from the election,
without loosing any honour. SUCH a pity...}
[Mikado starts whistling a tune as he turns down a corner.
Rushing up the hallway towards him are Ferro and Chance.]
Mikado: [Waves] Hello, men. It looks like you don't have to
worry about anything anymore.
Chance: We're too late?
Mikado: From stopping me from getting out of the election?
I'm happy to say, yes.
Ferro: Mikado, we found out some disturbing news..
Mikado: Whatever it is, it can wait..
[Mikado walks past them, and down another hall, striding
happily.]
Ferro: But..
[Chance grabs onto Ferro's arm.]
Chance: Leave it be.
Ferro: Sir?
Chance: He's already dropped. We can't release this info, or
Suiko will be forced to drop from the race as well,
leaving only Wakai as a candidate.
Ferro: ...Giving the Swimming Club control of the school
council.
Chance: Exactly.
Ferro: [Frowns, and leans against a wall. He rubs his temples.]
Man, this place isn't always as Mickey Mouse as it
looks...
Chance: Glad you're coming to see that, Lieutennant.
-=-
[Cut to the school's main office, where Mikado stands in front of
the PA system, talking into an open mike.]
Mikado: ...It is with deep regrets that I announce my
dropping from the election. I apologize to all those that
I may have led on...
[Cut to different parts of the school as Mikado makes his speech.
First to a half dozen assembled Swimming Club members. Kazue
looks up at the PA system in irritation.]
Kazue: What do you mean, you're dropping out? I just came up
with a plan to make you do that myself!
Wakai: [Breathing a sigh of relief] Thank goodness.
Kazue: [Turning around] Don't think this election is over for
you, Wakai...
-=-
Mikado: ...Could I but run, I would, to satisfy the wishes of
my fans. However, conflicts with my skating career deem
it impossible...
[Cut to Kureena Mitsuka, typing madly away at a computer.]
Kureena: Now, what would make a good title... 'Mikado Sanzenin:
Tales of the indecisive two-faced political wannabe'...
[Ponders] Or am I being a bit bitter...? [Gets back to
typing] Maybe I should make it a little nastier...
-=-
Mikado: ... I only found out about these conflicts recently, and I
had to make a descion. A very important decision. And I
realize...
[Hajinai and Suiko have glasses out, and are toasting to Mikado's
speech.]
Suiko: To Mikado's wise decision! Thanks for your help, sir.
Hajinai: I'll drink to that, Suiko...
[Both sip happily at their sake glasses.]
-=-
Mikado: ...My skating shall always come first, and I would not wish
to jeaprodize my position as captain. Indeed, it is a
position I consider more important than that of School Council
President...
[Koichi turns off his own PA system, a small smile on his face.]
Koichi: One small step Mikado. But will it be enough, and in
time...?
[Koichi looks out the back mirror of his office, which looks down
onto the skating rink. He watches, arms clasped behind his back,
as Ryuuken continues to skate across the ice..]
-=-
[Cut back to the school office. Josie has wandered in, a curious
look on her face.]
Mikado: A position I will leave in the competent hands of my
opponents, whichever of them may win. Thank you.
[Mikado puts the microphone down, and sees Josie approaching.]
Mikado: [Smiling] Yes, it's really me.
Josie: [Smiling back] I thought it'd have to be. Otherwise,
Chance would've cut you off by now.
Mikado: Too true.
Josie: [Looking a little uncertain] But to tell the truth,
I was kind of hoping you would be Phrank...
Mikado: Haven't you seen him?
Josie: [Shakes her head] Not since lunch...
Mikado: Odd, I wonder where he could be..?
[The two walk out of the office, and start checking througout
the school. They completely bypass the gym, which is unfortunate,
because inside is Phrank. He kneels towards a trio of students, who
are all dressed in drab grey kendo garb. They look to each other,
and then towards an older man, dressed in the same pants, but
shirtless. The man nods, and then the trio nods to each other.
They motion for Phrank to stand up, who complies in short order.
One of the students hands Phrank a shinai, which Phrank accepts
with a deep bow.]
------------------------------------------------------------------
(Cut to commercial. When the show comes back on, the credits roll.
Mikado is roller-blading along a road, images of all the other
characters from the show fading in and out from the image. Time
passes, and the sky slowly gets darker as he skates along. As the song
comes to a close, Mikado stops skating, and stares out across a bay,
moon reflecting off the water. The camera rises up, showing Mikado's
face as a constellation in the stars.)
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Mikado Ichiban: Zembun Otoko!
Episode 14: You've got my vote!
Written by: Eric Jones
Special Thanks: Arthur Edwards (Marathon 1/2)
William McDuff (the edits!)
Eric Jones
dbowie@unix.uvic.ca
ejones@butterfly.uvic.ca
http://kafka.uvic.ca/~ejones/