OOPS:
                        A Story of Self-Insertion
                                Gone Wrong

	My life was good.

	I mean, I'd managed to pull off the slickest trick of the year.  I'd
capitalized on the fact that I'd been cast through time and space to
Mega-Tokyo in the year 2033 by joining the Knight Sabres.  Exploiting my
knowledge of what had happened in the Bubblegum Crisis OAVs, I'd earned
Sylia's trust, Nene's admiration, and Priss' grudging respect.

	(I wasn't sure how Linna felt about me, 'cause she was just kinda
*there*, y'know?)

	Most importantly, I'd been able to influence events so that Priss
didn't have to kill Sylvie, and was able to save Anri from Largo in the
bargain.  I'd been so happy to watch the two androids go skipping off
together, hand-in-hand.

	Anyway, a few days later, I was watching the Fiftieth Anniversary
re-release of Blade Runner when I heard a knocking at my apartment door.  I
got up, checked, and saw that it was Priss.  She was smiling the same
seductive smile that she'd used on Mackie a few weeks earlier.  It set my
heart to racing, and I quickly opened the door.

	"Y'know," she said without preamble, "I've been thinking, and I just
realized ... Anri and Sylvie coming out okay ... that was your doing, wasn't
it?"

	I admitted that it was as I inwardly exulted.  At last, I would
achieve the dream of every BGC self-insertion author -- doin' the nasty with
Priss.

	She smiled again.  "I really owe you something for that, I think."

	I smiled back and said, "Okay, I'm ready."

	"Oh good," she said and belted me in the stomach.  I went down hard,
finally noticing the somewhat insane light in her eyes as she leapt on me
and started throttling me with her bare hands.

	"Why?" I gasped out.

	"Anri!  With Sylvie!" she shouted.  "Me!  *Alone*!  Now, you might
think I'd be happy for the woman I wanted a relationship with, now that
she's with someone else.  But guess what!  I'm *not* that selfless!  She's
shacked up with that little green-haired twit and IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" she
finally screamed.

	My life was good.

	Emphasis, was. 

                                 THE END

Author's Notes

	This is dedicated to Bert van Vliet.

	Ever notice that in self-insertion BGC fics, Priss and Sylvie were
only good friends?  I wonder why that is?

	Bubblegum Crisis was created by Toshimichi Suzuki and others, and
brought to North America by AnimEigo.  This story, while incorporating
elements of a motion picture held under copyright by others, is copyright
1996 of Chris Davies.

	Nobody Sue Me Okay?