Nihao!
The warm weather (FINALLY!!!!) has stirred the ideas up again. Please, reading the c&cs� for these is almost as fun as writing them.
Jusenkyo Guide
The office of Jusenkyo Productions. Ok, ok, it�s really the JTSU Computer Lab at the University of Nevada, Reno, but you knew that already ne?
The letter had arrived written in crayon on the back of a place mat from McDonalds.
�So who�s it from Washu?� Nene asked, looking up from reading who got the Chicken Ball Awards.
�JG,� The 20,000 year old genus replied.
�And?� Skuld asked.
�And what?�
�What does he say?!� the pint sized goddess demanded.
Washu cleared her throat and started to read.
�Dear Nene, Washu, and Skuld,� it began, �I hope this finds you well. I�m enjoying my stay in this nice resort, although I keep on wondering why they but mattresses on the walls. I�ve decided that I want to come back home so I�ve bribed Ryoko to give me a ride home.�
�So THAT�S it!� Washu exclamed.
�What�s it?� Nene wanted to know.
�Ryoko�s been gloating lately that she�s going to be doing a lemon with Tenchi.�
�You�ll never believe who�ve I�ve met in here, God, Napoleon, and some guy who claims that he�s immortal. Oh well, I�ll be home soon and in the mean time, here�s something else for you three to read.
JG�
�Well what is it?� Skuld wanted to know.
Washu sighed, �Here we go again,� she said and showed the story to her fellow goddesses.
Jusenkyo Productions Proudly Presents
A Bubblegum Crisis Fan Fiction
Insane In the Membrane 2: The Insanity Returns!
(Bubblegum Crisis is not owned by me, although if the owners ever read this, they might say that they don�t own it as well.)
�There once was a new doctor at an insane asylum who went out to visit the inmates one morning. He stopped by one bed and asked, �Who are you?�
�I�m Napoleon,� the man answered.
�And how do you know this?� the doctor asked.
�God told me,� he said.
From the other side of the room came a deep voice that said, �I did not!��
Commander Pavel Chekov who for some reason was disguised as a cop on Babylon 5
The Imp of the Perverse was bored, this was a BAD thing. When the Imp was bored, things happened that shouldn�t have. After playing with Ikari Gendou for a while, the Imp decided to move on to a New World. Searching around it found something that looked like fun, an old sheet of music. Seating itself at the Harpsichord of Discord it began to play. The song was entitled Bubblegum Crisis.
Priss and Leon
Priss pounded on the heavy metal door sending hollow booming sounds around the chamber.
"Face it Priss, they can�t hear us," her companion sighed.
Priss turned to face him, "I�m not going to be trapped, and I�m especially not going to be trapped in here with you."
Leon rolled his eyes, "Look, I�m not going to do anything," he protested.
Priss�s expression told him clearly that she didn�t believe him.
Leon got up from where he was sitting and moved towards her, "Until either the AD Police or your friends find us we�re trapped here. We might as well just sit down and relax."
"Well it�s your fault we�re trapped in here," Priss shot back.
"I did not plan for a boomer attack tonight," Leon replied with some heat.
He went back to the other side of the room and slid to the ground, remembering a night that was one disaster after another.
Leon had decided to confront Priss about her being in the Knight Sabers, he figured that they best way to do that was to lure her out with the promise of a free steak dinner. He was right on the verge of telling her that he knew when a boomer crashed into the restaurant.
The rest was kind of a blur, he seemed to remember calling for ADP backup on his pager watch, then standing with Priss firing rounds into the mechanical monster with no effect. He did remember them both running out of bullets and running to the back of the restaurant and hiding in the meat locker. After that the noises that he heard told him that the ADP had gotten there along with the Knight Sabers. A few explosions latter blocked the door trapping him with Priss. It wasn�t an unpleasant prospect on the surface, but Priss didn�t share that feeling.
Leon sighed, it was going to be a long night.
A few hours later���.
After running through all the songs that Priss knew, she and Leon had started into the old, old, classic, �99 Bottles of Sake on the Wall� in a effort to keep warm.
A few more hours��..
Leon was becoming quite impressed with Priss�s martial arts abilities.
Still some more hours��
If you put a man and a woman in a locked room for a while, you know what might happen after a few days. Do the same to a pair that actually likes one another, and it happens in an hour or two. In Priss�s and Leon�s case it was more like six hours. Not that Leon wasn�t willing, but Priss had to be stubborn about it. But in the end, tight quarters, a cold room, and Leon actually not trying to hit on her every few seconds brought her over as well.
In the stillness of the locker, some gasps and giggling where heard then a rather particular sound.
�Tink, tink, tink," followed by, �snap!� and a shattering sound as if someone had dropped a glass plate on the floor.
This was followed by Leon�s anguished scream, "It�s broken!"
And Priss�s, "Wow, I didn�t know that cold could do THAT to it."
The Imp tickled the ivory.
It�s That Time of the Month:
It was the Knight Sabers traditional after the battle gathering in Sylia�s penthouse along with the traditional after the battle fight between Nene, Priss, and Linna. Shouts of �Little Miss Cyberpunk�, �Ape Woman�, and �Money Crazed Witch� echoed from one end to another in the small room. None of the combatants noticed the silent member getting redder and redder finally she had enough.
�SHUT UP!!!!!!! JUST SHUT UP ALL OF YOU! You have no idea just how tired I am of you all fighting and bickering all the time. I gather you together, give you a chance at something and all you ever do is complain, complain, COMPLAIN!!!!!!� With that she stormed out of the room.
Priss looked at the other two, �Uh, who�s turn was it to watch for that?�
�I think it was mine,� Linna said, �Sorry.�
Nene just shook her head, �I�m going to be glad when this week�s over. Who�d have ever thought that Sylia would have PMS?�
(Um, as a friend of mine is threading me will all kinds of bodily harm, I apologize to any females that I may have offended.)
The Imp paused for a second, snickered, and played on�
Almost There!:
Quincey was NOT a happy camper. Growling to himself he once more looked at the note that arrived that morning. It read,
To: The Chairman of GENOM ltd.
From: TCI
Re: World Domination
Sir,
It has come to our attention that you plan to use your company to take over the world. We at TCI feel that if GENOM did this it would disrupt our business. Therefore, we ask that you please do not go ahead with your plan. Failure to do so will result in your cable being cut.
Thank you,
TCI Cable
�We were so close,� Quincey murmured to himself.
The Imp thundered on its keyboard�
What The�?:
Inspectors Leon McNichol and Daley Wong sat down at their usual booth in the ADP cafateria next to the window and ordered coffee. After they checked it for spoons, knives, acid, and made sure that it wasn't going to get up and walk away, Daley began to review their latest case.
Leon immediately fazed out on what ever was said. Instead, he looked out the window and tried to remember if Priss was singing anywhere tonight. It was a nice day with very little smog.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, a storm cloud formed. Lighting flashed and the thunder rumbled, shaking the ADP building. After only a minute, it was gone.
"What ...?" Daley was interrupted by the strangest sight he had seen in resent memory, which was quite strange considering the company he kept.
A very short, old man wearing underwear on his head ran up the side of the building carrying a sack filled with lingerie. "What a haul! What a haul!" he yelled gleefully.
He was followed by the Knight Sabers, the white one taking aim and yelling, "Those are mine! You haven't paid for them yet!"
The four Knight Sabers were followed by a strange group. A red headed pig-tail girl in men's clothing, a black haired girl waving a mallet, a baby black pig with a yellow and black tiger striped bandanna, a pair of ice skaters still wearing their skates, a woman in a leotard waving a dance ribbon and throwing black roses, a young man waving a wooden katana, another woman waving a giant spatula, a kitten, a duck wearing glasses, an old woman with large eyes, long white hair and a gnarled stick, a giant panda, a man with a mustache carrying a girl riding piggy back punching figures into a calculator, a young man with fogged up glasses carrying a woman with a kind face and beautiful hair, and lastly boy with melted candles on both sides of his head riding a winged bull.
"Come back here you ol' pervert!"
"Ranma, no Baka!"
"Squeeeeellllll!"
"My wittle Charlotte!"
"Who should be the lucky girl that gets to have my lips grace hers?"
"Oh Ranma darling!"
"My Pig-tailed goddess!"
"Ranma, Honey!"
"Meeeeooooowwww!"
"Quack, quack, quack!"
"Just marry Shampoo, Son-in law!"
"Mumble, Mumble."
"Oh, my little girl!"
"If I can get the copy rights to this story, I might be able to pay for the damages..."
"K...K... Kasumui!"
"Oh, my!"
"Snort, Snort!"
"I have it figured out! If I recite the spell backwards, I can get us all back home!"
Leon and Daley sat there for a moment, not saying a word. Once again, storm clouds formed out of nowhere. The lighting hit the top of Genom towers (insert loud cheering through out the ADP building) and the thunder rocked Mega-Tokyo. After only a minute, the storm disappeared.
The Knight Sabers dropped past the window. The white one carried a torn sack filled with lingerie. The red Saber waved at the inspectors and the one in green gave a thumbs-up sign. The last one blew Leon a kiss.
Leon turned to Daley and asked, "Is today a Monday?"
The Imp danced on the keys�
Pink and the Boomer:
�Gee Brain, what are we going to do tonight?� the mentally challenged rodent asked.
�The same thing we do every night Pinky,� The Brain said, �Stand in line to take over the world! (Yup, they�re still in line)
A chorus composed of the Knight Sabers appears singing, �They�re Pinky, they�re Pinky and the Brain, and GENOM, and NERV, and Seele, and Largo, and�
The Imp held up its left hand, then its right, �Look ma, no hands!� It was playing with its toes�
Priss and Leon2:
�That pervert!� Priss screamed as she rushed into Sylia�s living room.
�What�s the matter Priss?� Nene, who was sitting on the couch, asked.
�I found a camera lens in my changing room again. That little pervert�s going to get it,� Priss declared.
Sylia smiled, �Not to worry, I set up his monitor with a little surprise.�
�Oh? What did you do?� Priss wanted to know.
Nene grinned evilly, �We set it up so that if he activates any of his taps, he�ll get sprayed with a black ink that won�t wash off.�
Priss grinned back.
Linna wandered in and asked, �Why are you all grinning like the cat that got into the cream?�
Sylia informed her just what they did.
�Great!� Linna exclaimed, �That�ll get him back for all the times he peeked at me. Oh, by the way Priss, I saw Leon�s car parked out front.�
Priss groaned.
Just then Mackie wandered into the room, his face was clean as a whistle.
�I thought you said he could wash it off,� Priss whispered to Nene.
�You can�t,� Nene whispered back, �We use it at the ADP to mark stolen boomer parts all the time.�
Mackie went over to Priss, �Leon wants to see you,� he said.
Priss groaned again, �Send him in.�
Leon came in, his face was black.
The Imp smiled, �I�ll leave the rest to your imagination,� it said�
The Name:
The whispering had begun late that year for her. It at first was just something in the back of her mind, thought noise, but lately it had grown to where she was able to make out words. It was worse every time she put on the hardsuit.
Nene was afraid that she was slowly losing her mind.
Talking with Sylia didn't help. Sylia just ran her through a complete physical and all that came from that was being told that she needed to go on a diet. Linna thought that what she needed was a boyfriend and had tried to hook her up with Mackie. Priss had decided to get her drunk that night, which led to some rather interesting times later on. The only upside was that now Mackie was wandering around with this stupid grin on his face and hadn't tried to take a picture for weeks.
But the whispering continued.
The suggestions were becoming harder and harder to block out. Nene spent all of her time now trying to keep from succumbing to the commands.
Finally, one dark night after a boomer attack, she fell.
Walking like a sleepwalker, Nene left her apartment and walked to the Lady's 633. The lights were off and the door was locked. Not a problem however, not when she had helped Sylia update the system.
Quickly she disarmed the system and crept into the building, heading for the secret entrance to where the Knight Sabers kept their hardsuits. In her mind, the whispering was growing more intense as the seconds past by.
Nene walked softly through the HQ until she came to the cold storage bank that held the hardsuits. She went to the one that held hers and opened the unit. A hiss and a cloud of white greeted her as the unit opened to reveal her red and pink suit.
Trembling with excitement, and scared as to what would happen, Nene Romanova, Knight Saber and AD Police officer, gave herself over utterly to the whispering in her mind.
With a low happy cry, Nene flung herself into the arms of her suit. She started to caress the suit murmuring to it, "Oh Oscar, did that mean old boomer hurt you?"
Nene continued to hug the suit, talking and petting it like one would a cat. Then she found a small dent in 'Oscar'.
Nene sat up, rage boiling through her veins. With a loud cry of, "MACKIE!!!!!!!" Nene went off to hunt down the Knight Sabers mechanic to weak revenge, and wreak him, for damaging her beloved 'Oscar'.
As the Lady's 633 woke to the sounds of Nene's angry yelling and Mackie's desperate retreat, the whispering stopped. Like other red headed policewomen before her, Nene had named her weapon of mass destruction.
The Imp did its version of Beethoven�s 5th�
Largo�s Back and There�s Goina Be Trouble. Hey La, Hey La, Largo�s Back!:
�Sylia,� Nene said in a bored tone, �Largo�s back.�
Sylia sighed, �Again? That�s the fifth time this month. Oh well, have everyone meet me here and suit up.�
A few hours later.
�At last Sylia Stingray, I have you!� Largo said, yet again.
Yawing, Sylia sliced him in half.
�It does not matter if you kill me! I will download myself into another body! I will have you Syila Stingray!� The dying Largo said, again.
Priss sighed, �Man, some people just won�t take no for an answer.�
�And now,� the Imp said, �The Grand Finale!�
Go Go, There Goes MegaTokyo�:
�Sylia!� Nene screamed over the phone line.
Sylia winced a bit then tried to calm the hysterical redhead down, �What�s wrong Nene?�
�Sylia, he�s back! He�s back!�
�Who? Who�s back?� Sylia asked, praying that it wasn�t Largo, again.
�Godzila!� Nene yelled, �He just came out of the water and is now heading towards GENOM tower.�
Sylia blinked a few times, �He�s heading for the tower?�
�Yes, ohmygod, ADP units say that he�s starting to rip it apart,� Nene reported, �Sylia, what should we do?�
Sylia thought about for a second, just a second, �Don�t worry about it.�
�Nani?�
�It�s GENOM�s problem, let them deal with it.�
And with that, Sylia Stingray went to bed, smiling.
The Imp stopped playing, he had run out of music. �Now what do,� it mused. A light bulb flashed over its head. Smiling, it pick up another sheet of music, this one was called Tenchi Muyo.
�And the beat goes on!� The Imp exclaimed, and began to play.
************************************************************************
Office of Jusenkyo Productions
The three goddesses looked at each other.
�I think that perhaps JG needs some more rest,� Washu said.
�Some place far away,� Nene added.
Skuld grinned, �We could send him somewhere nice and warm.�
�Like?� Washu asked.
�Tokyo3?� Skuld suggested.
�Perfect!� The other two exclaimed!
Authors Note: Ano� Does anyone know how to escape Asuka and pilot an EVA?
And the Beat Goes On�
---
Here sir we come to famous training ground of accursed springs
--------------------------------------------------------------
|Guide of the training grounds|Ranma 1/2, Tenchi Muyo, BGC, |
|of accursed springs, 8th |AMG, Tank Police, Gall Force, |
|Disciple of Eriond, and proud|YUA, GitS, ADP, Evangelion |
| member of the #SkAS# |Project A-ko, UY, VPM, BGC! |
|--------http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/6549 ----------------|
|Akane, Linna, Washu, Nene, |Nene showed Mackie just how |
|Skuld, Belldandy, Kiyone |much she knew. Winter Blossoms|
---------------------------Jusenkyo---------------------------
Get your FREE, private e-mail
account at http://www.mailcity.com