My yearly piece of mildy grumpy, semi-helpful C&C.

Good side: The writing's fairly tight; no terrible stylistic mistakes.
Fairly good job showing us the scene, and running through events.

Bad side:

   1. This plot (Ranma and Ryouga fight, Ryouga rapes Ranma, Ryouga flees,
    Ranma/Ryouga's kid shows up for revenge) has been done before. A lot.
    In fact, it's been done so often that Nick Liefker parodied it in
    Black Lemonade.

   2. Despite the fact that it's been done before, the premise is riddled
    with flaws. First: after the first few volumes, Ranma and Ryouga
    Settle down into a friendly rivalry. Second: you have Ryouga beat
    Ranma 'fairly' (no new technique, etc) which isn't terribly likely.
    Third: even assuming Ryouga is scummy enough to rape someone, he's
    repeatedly shown disgust at the thought of intimate contact with
    Ranma, to the point of fleeing screaming in disgust after she kisses
    him. Fourth: Ranma would hunt him down himself, not wait seventeen
    years for his kid to grow up. Fifth: Sorry, but I find it hard to
    believe that a 16 year old girl is stronger than a 33 year old Ryouga.

   3. Why does everyone seeking to avenge their father wear a black cloak?
    Is it a fashion statement?

- Mike Loader
===/\=====+==================================================================
  /  \    l  "For, look you, there is humour in all things, and the truest
 / () \   l   philosophy is that which teaches us to find it and make the
/      \  l   most of it." - Jack Point, _The Yeomen of the Guard_
--------  l                    mike@thekeep.org
==========+==================================================================
Fnord.