David Johnston <rgorman@telusplanet.net> wrote:

Overall, very good. Nice to see an IC Nodoka. The story did seem a
little thin on descriptions; I had trouble picturing what was going on
in some of the scenes.

There were missing end quote marks in a couple of paragraphs. Oh, and:

"Get offa me, Kodachi," Akira wearily ordered.  Any 
lingering hint of arousal at close contact with a nubile
female body was by far overshadowed by embarassment and
frustration.  Kodachi had apparently been spying on the
tenth form from a tree at the edge of the athletic field,
and she'd jumped onto his back as soon as he'd landed.
Her gifts as a contortionist

Looks like an editing mistake here. This paragraph sort of stops
abruptly. Don't you hate it when that


Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics