Remember the little teaser I posted up about two months ago? I had finally
decided to write out the whole story and now, I'm posting to the FFML.
Please, please give C&Cs as I'm really keen to make my fic better in all
aspects. =) Many thanks to Rhionae who was willing to pre-read my fics. Thanks! 

Siew Lee 
[wsiewlee@tm.net.my]

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True Feelings 

A Dragonball Z fanfic by Siew Lee 

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It was eight o'clock in the morning. Rays of sunshine peered 
over the ebony windowsill, extending its warm touch on a human 
figure. Or maybe not quite human. The figure's lavender hair was 
wildly spread out on a green pillow, bed sheets and blankets were 
thrown all about messily. 

Suddenly, the phone began ringing. 

Trunks hated to get up to answer phones while he was trying to 
sleep. In an effort to muffle to the constant annoying noise, the 
figure on the bed threw a pillow at the phone on the bedside table. 

Perfect throw! The phone immediately stopped ringing. The 
figure heaved a sigh of relief and resumed sleeping again... Besides, 
who would be so crazy to call in the early morning? 

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[Trunks' story] 

I sat on a cliff overlooking the aqua-blue ocean ahead of me. 
The sea breeze was blowing very hard, and very cold too. The sky was 
blue as cornflowers with little white clouds dotting the entire sky. 
Maybe it was getting a bit dark. Clouds had begun to form dark 
shadows and the sky was changing into a reddish hue. The bright 
orange ball of sun was setting slowly past the horizon, marking the 
end of the day. The sun's rays blazed fiercely against the calm 
waters, yet I sat there, hardly moving at all. 

I was 29 years old --- so depressing. Thirties was coming soon 
yet I hardly had time to enjoy life. No time to enjoy life? Others 
may think that I was joking, but I was not. Maybe back during my 
schooldays, I had tasted what was really a true life. I was a 
notorious playboy and spoilt teenager, always using my poor friend 
Goten for my own purpose. I had thought that the world would never 
fall on me, as I was the son of a Saiyajin prince and my mother was 
the CEO of Capsule Corp. But that time, I was wrong; I admitted it. 

Almost laughing out aloud, I lay back on the soft grass 
languidly. Time really passed quickly, I was so old and grown up now. 
Maybe I should find a life partner; but my responsibility at the 
Capsule Corp. didn't allow it. I diverted my thoughts to Goten. He 
was the son of a lowly Saiyajin warrior, as my father had always 
said; but I tended to forget that when I was playing together with 
him, or just simply talking to him. Even Goten now had a wife, and I 
didn't. Sometimes when I saw him laughing or talking with his wife, I 
almost felt pangs of jealousy within me. By looks, I was definitely 
better looking; by brains, I was also definitely the winner! 

Forget about Goten, once he was married, he didn't even visit 
me more than twice. My mother was the CEO of Capsule Corp, a genius. 
I had always wondered to myself how did my mother had become 
attracted by my father. Their nature and ways of life were so 
adverse, so different, so contrasting. Yet, they got along well. My 
mother was so hardworking, always so absorbed by new inventions, but 
my father was too obsessed with strength and power. He was always off 
for some type of training. I sighed melancholically, maybe opposites 
attract. 

Uncle Goku was so easy going and funny at times. I had really 
felt the warmth and caring attitude that he possessed, instead of my 
father, who seemed so cold and detached from the rest. I still 
trained a lot, but not with my father anymore as I felt that perhaps  
I was better off training by myself. Deep down inside, I loved him. I 
knew he felt the same for me too; but he would never ever tell that
to anybody, not even to me. 

Slowly, I blinked open my eyes. It was getting quite late, I 
ought to go back home right now, or my mother will grumble and nag on 
me. On the other hand... it wouldn't hurt to break the rules once in 
a while. An evil grin lit up on my face; I would spend the night 
here. It was so cooling and relaxing... 

I closed my eyes once again and resumed my reminiscences of my 
childhood. Yeah, it was full of fun, and full of danger. I could 
still feel the familiar rush of excitement every time I was to face 
any danger together with Goten. The chilling sensation of fusion 
dance... Wow ho! That was amusing. 

I played around with thoughts and memories... Of all a sudden, 
I thought of Pan, Gohan's daughter. She had grown into a lovely and 
vibrant flower after all these years. Yeah, she was a sweet girl, 
always that polite and cheerful. In fact, I felt a strange feeling 
whenever I was with her, weird. I had never experienced emotions like 
that when I was dating other girls. Nah, she wasn't the correct girl 
for me. She wasn't wild enough... Maybe she could be wild... Who 
knows? I daydreamed on... Outrageous fantasies with *her*. 

Nearly noiselessly, I could sense someone was walking towards 
me... At last, that figure sat down beside me... I guess it was just 
Goten anyway... But I was wrong...

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[Through a mother's eyes] 

	"Trunks?" I called out. The boy, now a man, was sitting on a 
tuft of grass overlooking the sea. Time passed so quickly, the boy 
had grown so well and fast that I could barely recognize him 
nowadays. I knew he would sit here whenever he had any problems with 
life, though I seriously doubt that he ever had any. 

	"Trunks?" I called out again. This time, he turned back his 
head and looked at me. He looked a little shocked, but he quickly 
regained his composure. Maybe he wasn't expecting anybody, or maybe 
he was expecting me to be someone else, judging from that shocked 
look on his face. 

	"Yes, mom," he replied me as I went ahead and sat down next to 
him. He looked a little sad, but a little happy at the same time. 

	"It's been a long time since I last talked to you privately," I 
began. 

	"Yeah, so why are you here, okaasan?" asked Trunks curiously. I
nearly laughed out loud at my son's question. 

	"Well, it doesn't hurt for me leave my work and spend some time 
with my dearest son, right?" I said with pure cheerfulness. I stopped 
laughing when I noticed that Trunks didn't look *that* happy... 

	"Trunks, tell me the truth, what is on your mind nowadays?" I 
asked, knowing that he wouldn't tell me anything; but he needed to be 
persuaded. Vegita also acted this way and I would have to talk him 
into telling me his worries. The Prince of Saiyajin didn't have 
'predicaments', as Vegita phrased it. A wry smile crossed my face as 
I thought of this strange feature that both father and son possessed. 

	"I know my son won't be sitting here if nothing has happened," 
I continued, knowing that he would eventually succumb to my 
persuasion. 

	"Well, it is just that I can't seem to understand this adverse 
world. Things are so different when you are out to face life alone," 
sighed Trunks...  

	"I understand. I, also, have traveled along this path before." 
A smile crossed my face as I said that. Memories of Goku and I 
finding Dragonballs... The Red Ribbon saga and escapade... Tenkaichi 
Budokai where Goku fought with Piccolo to emerge as a world 
champion... Those were just reminiscences of the past. 

	"Um... mom, do you mind telling me how you ended up with dad?" 
asked Trunks cautiously, and gulped when he finished asking. 

	"Why? Why do you want to know?" I asked curiously. It wasn't 
quite like Trunks to ask such questions. 

	"Well, I just want to know... Mom, don't you know that your 
character and dad's don't really match?" replied Trunks, providing 
his explanation. Yeah, maybe that question had intrigued him for many 
years until now. 

	"Hm... Let me see... I don't really know how to phrase it but 
we just got together. Simply together," I answered my son. He raised 
a quizzical eyebrow, and that time I knew that he wouldn't be 
satisfied with such a plain answer. 

	I paused for a while, letting the wind whip my hair a little 
before smoothing it again. "Well, you father was a Saiyajin prince 
and he practically had an ego the size of this universe... To you, he 
may seem cold and detached, but he really cared for our family..." 

	Trunks nodded attentively as I explained slowly... It was not 
easy to summarize a story, a life that expanded over such a long 
period of time... I began talking again. "Trunks, how old are you 
now?" I asked suddenly, as something in reality had struck me. 

	"29," answered Trunks, his voice showing a slight twinge of 
resentment. Of all, why resentment? Most probably he felt that he had
wasted too much precious time over useless activities. Only a mother 
could see that; only I could see through what Trunks was actually 
thinking. 

	"You are grown up now, even your sister, Bra-chan, is in her 
teens. All this time, I have aged..." I said plaintively... 29 
years... "Time flowed past us so fast, not stopping for us to catch 
up at all. It has been more than 29 years when I first met your 
father. Yeah, he was an arrogant man at first, but as time went by, 
he changed. He may be a little softer nowadays, but he is still the 
Saiyajin Prince who I fell in love with..." 

	"How? Dad was a little strict to me, but overall I still think 
he is a terrific dad," interrupted Trunks, seeming as though hordes 
of questions were hounding him. 

	"Well, you haven't seen the softer side of him. He may look and 
act stern and impossible to talk with, but deep inside he still has 
feelings. Okay, maybe you wouldn't know how he feels and perceives 
things in him, but I know. I know that he has thoughts of his own..." 
I replied to my son. 

	I paused for a moment, thinking of what to say next. "Trunks, 
you are not young now. Got anybody you like?" I asked him. Intuition 
came to me in a rush. I finally understood what Trunks was worrying 
about. I knew that my son was a playboy... Perhaps he even slept 
around with girls, but I could sense that he was just fooling around. 

	Maybe he should settle down sometime soon... As I expected, a 
reddish hue began showing up on Trunks' cheeks. I smiled a secret 
smile. My son was in love! I should coax him to tell out the girl he 
wanted. 

	"Trunks, tell me the truth. Who is the girl?" I persuaded him. 

	"Um... No... Nobody," answered Trunks slowly. I guess he didn't 
want me poking into his personal business. 

	"Well, I think that it would be the best if you would tell me 
who that girl is. Maybe I could help you to get her," I offered, 
pondering if he would oblige. 

	"Okaasan, what if the girl's a lot younger than I am?" asked 
Trunks, his face turning an even brighter shade of red. 

	"Well, most important of all is the special love both of you 
shared. If you have decided to choose that girl, your father and I
won't stop you. Besides, it *is* your life, right?" I explained, 
my mouth curving into a soft smile. Yeah, Vegita and I shared that 
feeling. "What's the problem anyway?" 

	"Um... ah... She doesn't know what I feel towards her... In a 
way, she is unaware of me..." confessed Trunks, his expression 
turning gloomy. 

	"Then you should tell her the truth if you want a chance!" I 
exclaimed, surprised that my son would ever face such a problem. He 
was always very bold and daring in everything he did. Human beings 
faced predicaments. Saiyajins did too, and my son is a half Saiyajin. 

	"Thank you, okaasan. I think I know what to do now," said 
Trunks enthusiastically. His face was showing hope and faith in 
things. 

	"Are you coming home tonight?" I asked him, expecting the 
answer to be 'no'. 

	Trunks just smiled and shook his head. 

	I smiled at him back and walked away. He knew he had to do and 
I must give him time. 

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[Trunks' thoughts] 

	Maybe okaasan was right. I should face the reality like a true 
man. I should tell her, but what if she rejected me? I knew I won't 
be able to accept that easily, as I couldn't face my own ego... 

	There were a lot of things to think about lately, but this 
matter had long indulged itself in bothering me. In a way, it was 
reminding me to think about it, solve it... Pan was still young. 
Merely a teenage girl, but she was intelligent and brilliant for a 
girl of her age. Her thinking was mature, more like an adult, based 
on my experience through talks and discussions with her. I liked how 
she carried herself. 

	But there was still one more question that lay unresolved. 
Would she be able to accept me? I didn't dare to contemplate it any 
longer. The risk was simply too high... Perhaps she had her own sweetheart. 

	I sighed plaintively, life was so short and wonderful... but it 
wasn't complete without someone you truly loved to shared with. Maybe 
okassan was right. I should tell her the truth. It was no use sighing 
and dreaming about her the whole day, whereas she was totally unaware 
of what I felt towards her. Yes, I shall tell her. 

	Dusk set in... I was there, pondering the phrasing of words 
tomorrow. Tomorrow, it would be. I was set to disclose this secret of 
mine. Yes... it would no longer be a secret. 

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[Pan's dreams] 

	"Trunks..." I murmured in my dreams. His name was so 
enchanting, something like a magic spell. I sighed dreamily. His 
facial features were so cute... so gentle... I sat up straight in my 
bed. 16 years old... I was sixteen... I still couldn't believe that I 
had finally graduated from Junior High. 

	No... He was too old for me, but maybe not... I was sick of 
thinking of him day and night. I must stop thinking of him, but that 
was impossible. My mind wouldn't listen to my own commands... 

	*He is too old for me... He is too old for me...* I kept 
telling myself endlessly. I really didn't know what to do now. He 
probably had a girlfriend by now, judging from his background, 
personality and looks. It would be a miracle if girls didn't swoon 
over him once he was out of his office. 

	Yes, we had many adventures together, but it was not sufficient 
to satisfy my hunger for his attention. I closed my eyes in the 
semidarkness with pain and sorrow. It was very agonizing to like 
someone from a distance but lack the courage to tell him. My heart 
was thumping and I could hear it. It was very silent in the night, 
but there was hundreds of thousands of voice yelling in me... I 
couldn't... I couldn't live on like a normal girl. 

	A wry smile touched my lips as I recalled all the wonderful 
moments we had together as we fought villains and Evil itself. I was 
the daughter of Son-Gohan, one of the strongest fighters in the 
universe, but who would have thought that I was so vulnerable inside? 
I was quite stuck up and spoilt as a child; in a way, Trunks and I 
shared the same weak points. I shook my head miserably, what was the 
use? He would never know what I felt towards him... 

	Time flowed without stopping... I needed to get back to Earth 
before it was too late. There was no use reminiscing of the past. I 
lived in the light of Present, not the shadow of Past... 

	Dawn had arisen. I knew that it would be a totally new 
beginning for me. 

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[Confessions] 

	Trunks woke up to the touch of the early morning air, birds 
chirping happily... like if there were no such things like worry 
and dilemmas in this whole wide world. Trunks was very depressed. 
Although he had thought of certain words to express himself to Son 
Pan, he was still feeling uncertain. Uncertain?! Trunks had nearly 
never faced such a thing as uncertainty. It was an alien and strange 
feeling to him... 

	*I have to tell her somehow, right? I can't just hide my love 
for you behind an invulnerable barrier, Pan... Trunks, oh Trunks... 
Have you forgotten what okaasan told you yesterday?* Trunks chided 
himself. This was no time for doubts and hesitation... 

	Trunks braced himself emotionally and launched himself into the 
air. With an exertion of ki, he blasted away into the sky of 
Chikyusei, leaving behind a trail of light and dust... 

***

	Trunks stood in front of the Son house. Gohan and Videl weren't 
at home at the moment because he could see that the gate was unlocked 
and the garage empty. Gohan probably had some severe case of anti-
capsules as he had always refused to encapsulate his car. According 
to Gohan, capsules spoiled cars. 

	Trunks raised a fist to knock the door, but he pulled back when 
he was about to knock. That dreaded feeling rose up once again... He 
was afraid... Afraid to see Pan... Afraid of not knowing her 
reactions... 

	Trunks stood by the door miserably, unable to make a firm 
decision. He couldn't turn back now as he had come this far. He was 
torn in two. He could not tell her straight to the face, but he 
could not bear the humiliation if Pan rejected him. Trunks just 
simply didn't know what to do at that moment... He was fervently 
hoping for some type of aid, an aid that could propel him to gather 
enough courage to knock on that door. Just to knock on the door. 

	But he didn't need to. 

	Trunks was just burying his face in his hands when the door 
suddenly opened... Trunks quickly looked up and saw that it was Pan. 
Trunks flashed her a suave smile and sweat formed in his palms. 

	"Hi Trunks... Are you looking for my uncle? He is over at 
grandpa's house now..." said Pan, her face showing slight signs of 
surprise. 

	"Um... ah... no... ah... actually..." began Trunks nervously. 
*Oh no... I must look like a wreck right now,* thought Trunks as more 
cold sweat began forming on his forehead. 

	"Come inside first!" invited Pan, moving aside so that the 
wooden door could open wider. 

	"Ah... Thanks..." said Trunks as he walked into the cool 
interior of the house. Gohan's house was big, yet cozy. The 
decorations were tastefully chosen and placed at the right spots. 
Trunks began to feel a lot more comfortable now as his self 
confidence was slowly building up again. 

	"Have a seat and wait for a moment," said Pan as she 
disappeared into the kitchen to get a drink. Minutes later, Pan 
emerged again with a glass of lemonade. 

	Pan gingerly set the glass on the table and looked at Trunks. 
Pan even smiled a little. 

	*C'mon, it's your chance, dummy!* yelled a voice inside 
Trunks' head. "Um... Pan, there's something I have been wanting to 
tell you for a very long time..." began Trunks slowly. 

"Yes?" 

*Oh my god... She just looked so sweet...* Trunks shook off 
that thought and began confessing. "It's about you..." said Trunks. 
He hesitated for a while before continuing. "It is just that I have  
always loved you from a distance. In other words, I love you," 
blurted out Trunks, his face growing red from embarrassment. 

	Pan blinked her eyes a few times and simply stared at Trunks. 

	"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." apologized Trunks hastily. 
How he phrased it must have scared her... "Pan, I want you to know... 
I can't keep this secret forever and it was tormenting me every 
waking moment of my life... No, it was even tormenting me when I 
dreamed..." explained Trunks quickly. 

	Pan suddenly laughed out loud. "Is this some kind of joke?" 

	Trunks was shocked, his lower jaw slowly dropped open. She 
actually thought that it was some kind of joke! "No! It isn't! 
Damnit! How do you want me to say it? I love you! I love you! I love 
you! Do you get it now?" As Trunks said that, he went over to Pan's 
side of the sofa and grabbed her hands. Trunks looked at Pan straight 
in the eye. 

	Trunks stopped for a moment to wait for Pan's reaction. Pan 
stopped smiling and tears began to well up at the corners of her 
charming eyes. A tear slowly rolled down her face and dropped onto
the back of Trunks' right hand. 

	"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" asked Pan with a catch in her 
voice. 

	"I was afraid that you might reject me..." explained Trunks, 
the ceiling fan blowing his lavender hair a little. "Do you love me?" 
asked Trunks seriously. 

	"Of course I do! I do! Don't you know that you have always been 
the center of my attention? Didn't you notice me looking at you 
before? Why didn't you tell me earlier? I won't be worrying day and 
night about you liking me or not!" wept Pan as she hugged Trunks who 
was kneeling in front of her. 

	"I'm sorry..." apologized Trunks and he hugged Pan back. 
"Sheesh, don't cry anymore. Isn't it better now? At least both of us 
know what we feel for each other..." Trunks then pulled out of Pan's 
embrace and wiped away her tears. 

	"Listen here, I will love you always and forever." After Trunks 
said that, he gave Pan a kiss a on the cheek. 

	Suddenly, the front door opened with a slight creak. 

	Trunks and Pan broke apart in shock and looked at the door. The 
door swung open with two voices floating over to them, one male 
another female. It was Gohan and Videl.... 

	"Oh no..." mumbled Pan softly. Trunks' face was a total mask of 
fear and shock while Pan's was of total fright. 

	"Eh... Trunks! Why are you here?" asked Gohan. Trunks at once 
heaved a sigh of relief, luckily he and Pan had been quick enough... 

	"Nothing... I was just looking to see if Goten was here," lied 
Trunks quickly. He knew better than to tell Gohan the truth, 
perfectly aware that Gohan would blow up if he were to know what 
Trunks and his dearest baby daughter had been doing just now. 

	"Pan, why are you crying?" asked Videl as she noticed the tear 
streak on Pan's face. 

	"Um... mom, Trunks was just telling me about the poor children 
living on the streets. They were so pitiful that I couldn't help 
shedding a few tears," answered Pan, following in Trunks' footsteps. 
Gohan and Videl nodded in agreement. *Yes! They believed us!* 
celebrated Trunks and Pan secretly. 

	"Ah... I've to go now..." said Trunks. 

	"Let me out you out," offered Pan as she led Trunks out of the 
house. 

	As soon as they were out of earshot, Pan and Trunks both heaved 
a huge sigh of relief. 

	"Whew! That was close..." said Trunks. 

	"Yeah, what would my parents think if they were to see us 
kissing like that?" laughed Pan as she unlatched the gate. 

	"I'll wait for you... Okay, I'll phone you tonight," smiled 
Trunks and gave her a peck on the cheek. 

	"Fine! See you tomorrow," waved Pan as Trunks walked down the 
lane. Pan smiled happily as she saw the man of her dreams walk away. 
This was about the most memorable time of her life... 

They were a perfect couple. 

***

	Both of them felt the same thing. A heavy burden was lifted 
from their shoulders. It was true feelings that led them this way, 
the correct way... Trunks and Pan wouldn't have known their emotional 
turmoil if they weren't honest with each other. Sometimes, destiny 
also needed to be given a small push... 

It would be a wonderful life filled with love and passion. 

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Copyright reserved 1998 by W. Siew Lee 

All standard Dragonball Z disclaimers apply to this fanfic. 

E-mail: Siew Lee [wsiewlee@tm.net.my] 
URL: http://members.xoom.com/hiei/dragon.htm 
UIN: #14025577 

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