KaraOhki wrote:

Comments welcome
karaohki@snet.net, or through the list thanks!

        I enjoyed it a lot... it was a good short fic, and Ryouga was fairly ooc.  I think he might have been more upset at being seen as he changed, and perhaps David might have been more confused about what had happened.
        After all, it's not every day a man turns into a pig.  ^_^ I somewhat expected Ryouga to get lost as David was using the phone, since "Walking away" tends to denote out of sight.
        I would also ask for a bit more of why Ranma was treating Ryouga more like a friend than a Rival.  We know they're "Friends" <Assumption>, but usually they don't show it so blatantly.
        But, other than that, good characterization... and splendidly done I might add.  It was a bit touching, in the end, when Ryouga decided he could have fun without Akane.  I can almost mentally picture him saying in his mind "Goodbye Akane...." and it being the last time.
        ^_^ Keep up the good work!

--
Sincerely....
Shimitsu Kaoru.
Lost "Dragon-Boy"
of Shimitsu-Ryuu.
Prince of Chaos.
"What makes a curse is simply the view, a blessing to some is a curse unto you, But acceptance can conquer that fear you hold high, through acceptance comes peace..... are you willing to try?"
   -Quote from Kaoru Shimitsu.
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