I thought this was great. I read that the MG was a bit OOC for
any MG. I think that person should go watch some more anime.  I've seen a
few MG anime with sadistic characters like that in them. Hyperdolls,
Iczelion, just to name a few.

Uhm...Hyperdolls and Iczelion are not Mahou Shoujo. Far from it.

While admittedly they weren't  quite that

bad, I could easily imagine the existence of such an evil little girl.
I especially liked the bunny. I never understood how those cute
fuzzy critters always escaped death long enough to hang around for the
final battle in those shows. It also had a Monty Python esque quality.
Besides, give them an angst ridden Samuri type and a sexy female
thief who isn't really dependant to the team. [mabey for reconosance
missions, selling them info?] on the team. [This little cliff hanger
would be a prime location to introduce him/her.] and you've got a
somewhat sadistic version of  the cast of Lupin III killing magical
girls. I like that.
Great fic.
And an original at that. Don't see many  of those anymore on the
list...

I gave it props for being original and being a good write, the OOC of it all
was the biggest problem. Regardless of the writer's feelings, that's making
an entire genre OOC..Something I've never seen