Someone wanted an ORIGINAL SI fanfic.

I don't think you get much more original than this...

A Likely Story!
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(OR: And now for something completely different!)

Japan, wonderful Japan... Here I was on my Summer holiday, spending a 
Month in Japan, soaking up the culture, the Sake, and the original 
Manga.

     My first port of call was Nerima, actually; I wanted to see if the 
place was anything like the depictions in the Manga.

     And before you say anything, I was just settling my own curiosity 
to see what on earth had inspired Ms. Takahashi to write such a surreal 
saga.

     Well, I checked into a hotel, and went for a walk. And something 
caught my eye, and my attention- partly because I was hungry.

     "Well, I'll be damned! There really IS a Nekohanten!" It was about 
lunchtime, and I thought it might be a good place for a meal.

     "Nihao!"

     I stopped, stunned, as I saw the Chinese girl who stood in front of 
me. "Heh. Cute. Very cute. I bet this is a big merchandising place, 
right? Dress up like that for the tourists?"

     She looked a bit confused. "What crazy Gaijin want?"

     "Yeah, yeah, stay in character. I'll have a deluxe pork ramen- and 
add some chili to it. I like it hot."

     "Shampoo have your meal in five minutes!" She scampered off. I was 
itching to convince myself that she definitely WAS an actress by 
chucking a cup of water over her. BUT... If she turned into a cat, I'd 
faint, and if she didn't, I'd get something heavy thrown at me. Anyways, 
I sat down at a booth by the window, and looked outside.

     "They really have gone to town on this, haven't they?" I thought as 
I realised that the restaurant across the street was actually an 
okonomiyaki-ya, and was called 'Ucchans'. 

     "Deluxe super-spicy pork ramen! Enjoy!"

     "Arigato. Ummm... could you get me a Coke?"

     "Hai!" She turned around. "MOUSSE! Get Gaijin a Coke!"

     I nearly blew the ramen over the table when I saw the guy who came 
out of the back. It _was_ Mousse. Damn, where do they get such good 
actors? This one had to be some kind of acrobat as well. I mean, to trip 
like that. Anyhow, I went to help him up.

     "Thank you, miss."

     "Actually, it's mister."

     "Oh?" He adjusted his glasses. "I beg your pardon. Hey... what time 
is it?"

     "Nearly three."

     "What? watch the shop opposite. The fun's about to begin!"

     What fun? I mused, as 'Mousse' got my Coke, and came to join me.
Then I saw. Firstly, a vending machine sprinted rounfd the corner, and 
into Ucchans. Then a blonde-haired girl came flying out the window, 
closely followed by a black-haired girl with a BIG spatula, and a 
diminunitive Ninja.

     "Something like this happens every day at about this time." 
'Mousse' was sitting across from me, watching the show.

     "I can imagine. Street theatre, for the tourists?"

     "What?"

     "You know. All part of the Ranma merchandising."

     "Merchandising? That's real!"

     "Okay, keep in character. But there is no way that that's real."

     "Of course it is! Why, I was there when Ranma first used the 
Hiryuu-shoten-ha in combat!"

     As if on cue (which I'm fairly certain it was) a pillar of light 
exploded about a mile away.

     Then a young man with a bokken fell to the ground in front of the 
Nekohanten.

     "Cute. Very cute." It was all I could say.

     "Cute? Nay, they are beauteous! The noble huntress Akane, and the 
Healthy, bouncy pig-tailed girl! Both shall be mine!"

     "Come on, Kunou," said 'Mousse', "Have some tea. You'll feel a lot 
better after that."

     They are REALLY good actors. But then Mousse pulled out a packet of 
Marlboros.

     "In the series, Mousse dousn't smoke, you know."

     "Yeah," he replied, "But that's because Takahashi-san didn't think 
it fitted. After all, the Manga had to set a good example for the 
kiddies."

     I stared at him in disbelief. "Now come on. At worst, the stories 
are only based on people she knew. They're NOT REAL!"

     "You don't believe me then?" A bunch of flowers flew out of his 
sleeve.

     "Big deal." I shrugged, and drew some playing cards from nowhere 
(seemingly).

     "I see there's not a lot that can convince you. COLOGNE!"

     Sure enough, a wizened old woman came pogoing out of the kitchen on 
a staff. "You called, Son-in law?"

     "I thought Ranma was meant to be Shampoo's husband!"

     "Ah, Takahashi twiddled real life again. I wand Mousse to be 
Shampoo's husband, and she doesn't agree."

     I finished my Ramen and stood up. "Well, how much do I owe you?"

     "Eight hundred yen."

     "There ya go." I tossed the cash to Cologne. "Look, it's been nice, 
but there's NO WAY you can convince me that all this is real. Next 
you'll be saying that that boy there really is Ranma Saotome!" I walked 
out the door, just as a pigtailled guy came in, with a short-haired 
girl. 

As I was walking away, I heard a *SPLASH* and a scream that sounded like 
"I'LL KILL YOU YOU OLD PERVERT!"

I kept on walking.

I'd seen enough street theatre for one day.

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