"Morpheus the Shaper" <milamber@mindspring.com> wrote:

The Other Breaking Point

By

Morpheus the Shaper

The other characters are handled reasonably, but Ranma seems extremely
OOC to me. I think you really need to address *why* he's taking such
drastic and uncharacteristic steps to try to resolve his situation, 

when

he was generally pretty much content to follow the path of least
resistance in the series.

I think that's the whole point of the story.  Ranma's had enough of 
taking the path of least resistance, and having nothing but a set of 
footprints on his back to show for it.  Ranma reached his emotional 
breaking point, hence the title.

The writing looks pretty good... but one thing: never let two different
speakers have dialog in the same paragraph. Always start a new one when
the person talking changes.

Now how many times have I heard that one? *cough, coughLurkercough*

Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics

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