Okay... I thought I might as well throw my two cents in... ::takes a deep
breath:: here goes... (forgive me if parts of this start sounding corny):

Well, for starters, I'm (fairly) new to this list, and I joined 'cause I
really love to read, and I thought it would be good to improve my own writing,
and frankly, I really think it has.  I've got more ideas for fanfics then I've
ever had, and more people are saying that my writing is getting better and
better.  

My dream was to have my name up there with the 'big' fanfic writers -- Lurker,
Kleppe, SKJAM!, Lawson, and many, many others -- and when I found the web page
for the FFML, I was ecstatic.  I joined, and was at first overwhelmed with the
amount of mail that poured in.  I found many good fanfics, and was pleased to
find that many of my favorite authors were on this ML.  I eagerly awaited more
fics, and sat diligently through spam after spam after spam.  

After a while, I got up what little courage I had, and posted my newest fic,
which I found to be the best I had written so far.  I patiently waited for the
C&C to roll in -- I had seen many other fics get tons of C&C with only the
slightest mention for it, and I had begged and pleaded for it.  If I remember
correctly, my total number of responses was around 5.  I was a little miffed
at first, but then was pleased with it (hey, it meant at least *someone* had
read my stuff).  One incredibly nice and wonderful guy gave me C&C and
accepted to be my co-writer when I generously offered (okay, I demanded) it to
him.  Later, another person responded to it, and ripped my fic to pieces.  I
was completely crushed.  Luckily, my savior/co-writer defended me and
reestablished a little of my pride (^.^*).  Awhile later, I forgot my savior's
e-mail (;_;) and retreated into the depths of the ML, waiting for a topic that
I could try and respond to.  

I found many fics that I probably would have C&C'ed, but I was afraid that
nobody would really take a 14-year old no-name seriously, so I dug myself
deeper.  Many topics were way over my head, and I felt even more out of place.
Fics passed, and I greedily took any helpful hints on writing.  I continued
writing, very proud of my works, but still too afraid to post, after seeing so
much hostility to writers.  I begged for my savior (Freemage-sama) to come
back in contact with me so I could try to work up my courage again, but was
greeted with silence.  

I don't really know the reason why I wrote this; maybe I just wanted to be
recognized.  Maybe I wanted to tell people not to be so harsh on some people.
It's okay if you hated a fic, but don't scream at the writers.  How am I, a
14-year old freshman girl with high school crashing down on her s'posed to
compete fics with people like Kleppe and Lurker and Lawson?  My fic that I
posted was my pride and joy; one person killed it down with a single glance.
He later said he didn't mean to, that he *did* enjoy the fic, he just was
commenting on it.  Those comments killed my meager little ego.  All I'm saying
is please be nice with your C&C.  You can't all expect for us to be perfect
writers.  People join this ML to become better; shooting down their dreams
isn't a good way to do that.

........

Whew!!!  That was tiring!!  I'm not very good at writing serious stuff... it's
too boring.  >�  If you're reading this, that means you didn't delete this
mail and you actually sat through my whole rant.  Good for you!!!!  (Wow...
people are actually reading my stuff!!!  This is soooo cool!!!  *-*)  Ja ne!
~An-chan