Heartbreak

By: Dreiser


	The restaurant is empty when he enters. Our eyes meet and a 
silent understanding passes between us. While he may look different 
he is very much the same on the inside and we both know this. He sits 
down in front of the long counter and timidly rests his chin on the tops 
of his palms.
	A long sigh passes his lips before he speaks.
	"She's gone."
	I give a short nod as I start to prepare his food. Though she 
never knew it I often prepared food for him while she was off the 
premises. Though I didn't approve of his treatment of her I could 
understand his sense of adoration for her. It was a feeling that I 
definitely shared.
	In fact many of the feelings we had for Ukyo-sama were the 
same. We felt the same helplessness as when she rejected us time and 
time again to pursue Ranma. Then when he chose Akane over Ukyo 
we felt the same quiet rage at his rejection of such a wonderful 
person. And lastly when she left us to be with Shampoo of all people 
we felt the same sharp stabbing pain possess our hearts.
	Yes, I could understand him quite well. Just as well as he 
could in turn understand me. The two of us are peas in a pod. At 
times even I find the similarities frightening.
	I'm just thankful that due to my upbringing I'm far more 
restrained then he is in his romantic pursuits. I may be lovelorn but I'm 
not obsessive. At least I hope not.
	"She's the reason I started dressing like this."
	I look up and meet his gaze as he continues to talk in quiet 
tones. He seems only partially aware of my presence.
	"I don't think she realized that. I mean, I think she thought that 
I was a weird guy and nothing more. I guess that's true in a lot of 
ways. It's just that when I saw her that first day at school... it was like 
magic."
	Blue eyes lift in an appeal to me.
	"It was like in the movies... she was so pretty even disguised 
as a boy. I'd never seen anyone as bishonen as I am and I was so 
attracted to that. I also figured she was dressed that way because she 
was..."
	He trails off uncomfortably and I decide to show mercy on 
him. After all, I understand such mentality. Many think just the same 
about me and perhaps him as well.
	"I know. You thought she was a lesbian."
	"Yeah, that or bisexual. I wasn't really sure. Either way I 
figured she liked girls best so I decided that's what I would be to win 
her over. I mean, I was already using disguises almost all of the time 
because of my family's school of martial arts. If you can call it that..."
	"You can. My school is very much the same."
	For this he give a wry comment.
	"Yours is respected at least. I'm seen as a sideshow nuisance 
around these parts."
	I offer a sympathetic smile as I place the finishing toppings on 
his okonomiyaki and place it before him.
	"I wouldn't worry about it. Most of the people living in 
Nerima are seen that way at one time or another."
	He chuckles at this then delicately takes a bite of the 
okonomiyaki with his fork. Slowly and politely he chews it then 
swallows to offer me a wide smile.
	"It's good. Thank you."
	There's a lull of silence as he quietly eats and I feel drawn to 
voice the question floating in my mind.
	"You really thought that by dressing like a woman you'd be 
able to win her over?"
	Setting his fork down gently he meets my gaze and shrugs 
sheepishly then says.
	"I know it sounds stupid but that's what I really believed at the 
time. It's funny... when I got that picture of Ranma as a girl I was 
convinced I was right in my earlier assumptions and I almost gave up. 
Then I found out about his curse and that got hope brewing inside me 
all over again. I figured if he was a guy and she liked him maybe I 
stood a chance after all. Isn't a guy who turns into a girl almost equal 
to a guy who dresses like one?"
	He sighs and shakes his head.
	"She made it all too clear that she didn't want me and after 
awhile I understood that. I knew it was because she was in love with 
Ranma but then when he married Akane..."
	"The hope returned."
	Our eyes meet and he nods quietly.
	"You too, huh?"
	I sigh as I take his now empty plate and turn towards the sink 
to begin washing it.
	"Yes, me too. When Ranma married Akane I thought that it 
was the perfect chance to finally win Ukyo-sama over with the purity 
of my love for her. But for some reason she just couldn't see me as 
anything more than a friend."
	Another long silence passes before he breaks it to say in 
rather solemn tones.
	"It's the crossdressing. She doesn't like the crossdressing."
	I turn around and question incredulously.
	"What did you say?"
	"I said it's the crossdressing. She never gave either of us a 
chance because of the crossdressing. It's strange but I think she has 
this double standard about it. You know, that it's all right for her to 
dress like a boy but it's not all right for us to dress like girls."
	His face is thoughtful as he rests his chin on the palms of his 
hands and muses to himself.
	"Yeah... it had to be the crossdressing."
	Completely dazed at this revelation I lean back against the 
sink and question dumbly.
	"But why...? Why would it matter so much?"
	At this he releases a weary sigh then replies.
	"I'm not really sure. We'd have to ask her to know for sure 
but I think that because of how she was raised Ukyo-sama has some 
issues about how men and women should act. She didn't want to 
dress like a boy, her father made her for the sake of their so called 
family honor. She had to resent that... I think us dressing like girls 
maybe reminded her of that so she rejected us unconsciously."
	There was a moment of pause before he smiled then said 
humorously.
	"Or maybe she just doesn't like guys in dresses."
	Numbly I move around the counter to sit next to him on a 
stool. Resting my head in my hands I murmur.
	"I can't believe that would be the reason she rejected me. 
Ukyo-sama is better than that..."
	"Can I ask you something?"
	"Of course."
	"If she told you that she could love you but only if you dressed 
like a man, would you do it? Would you be able to do that for her?"
	I blink at this question and stare at the shiny surface of the 
counter as I consider it. Dress like a man? Never in my entire 
existence have I done that... in fact the very idea of it makes my skin 
crawl. It's against everything I was taught since childhood and 
disobeys the rules of my clan.
	"No..." I reply quietly. "I don't think I could. Not even for 
her." Lifting my gaze I look to him. "And you?"
	"Two weeks ago? Yes. Right now? No. I think I've finally 
learned my lesson. Then again, you could probably tell that from the 
way I'm dressed."
	Returning his friendly smile I inspect the pinstriped suit that 
he's wearing and nod in approval. Straightening his collar I 
compliment him softly.
	"You look very handsome Tsubasa."
	"Thanks, Konatsu."
	He blushes slightly and coughs while rubbing the back of his 
head. I note for the first time that his hair is loose instead of in its usual 
ponytail. I wonder if I should do the same with my own hair now that 
Ukyo-sama's gone. It isn't like I have anyone to dress up for now.
	Ukyo-sama... gone. Gone with Shampoo. Somehow I just 
cannot get myself to accept that. It's like my mind is in a daze and I 
can't make it believe that she's really gone. I look to him and see he's 
gazing at me in concern. Perhaps he might be able to offer some idea 
or explanation.
	"Why... why do you think she left with her?"
	Meeting my gaze he replies earnestly.
	"I don't know. Maybe she was the first person who ever 
really listened to her. We might have loved her, adored her, but did 
we ever really listen to her?"
	"No," I say in quiet shame. "No. We never did."
	"And that's why she's with her."
	There is another lull of silence and our eyes lock again. His 
blue eyes are twinkling playfully and returning his smile I say along 
with him.
	"That and she doesn't like the crossdressing."
	 
-End-

Both characters in this fanfiction are from Ranma 1/2. This fanfiction 
was inspired by the works of the great goddess Rumiko Takahashi. 
This is part of the series of one shots I'm writing with the different 
character interactions after the wedding of Ranma and Akane. Like 
Shy, Obsession, and Desire this story was partially inspired by a song 
that, oddly, doesn't have much to do with the lighthearted theme 
running in this fic. Scroll down if you'd like to read the slightly solemn 
lyrics to the song. Oh! And I wasn't trying to hide Konatsu or 
Tsubasa's identities so please don't write me saying how easy it was 
to guess who they were. Thanks much.

Send comments to: Dreiser1@ix.netcom.com

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"All I really wanted was some of your time but instead you told me 
lies while someone else was on your mind. Why did you do that to 
me? Look what you did to me. I thought that you were someone who 
would do me right until you played with my emotions and made me 
cry. Why did you do that to me? Look what you did to me. This is the 
heartbreak hotel."
-Whitney Houston-