Unrequited

By: Dreiser


	The sheets are cool and soft against my skin. I move on them 
and they wrinkle beneath me. Next to me I can feel as she shifts her 
weight on the bed.
	When I turn my head a pair of glittering eyes meet me. She 
forms that small smile of hers and I can't help but return it. The scent of 
roses fills my nostrils and when it does I notice several of them 
scattered on the bed.
	She notes my study of them and raises an eyebrow. "What?" 
she asks playfully. "You don't find it romantic?"
	"It's more extravagant than romantic."
	In a cat like movement she moves to lie on her back. She 
stretches her arms over her head and gazes at the ceiling. As she does 
this I study her features. In the early morning light they look much 
softer than I'm used to.
	Many would be surprised to see her like this. Gentle and 
open. For so long she has closed her heart off to any that would seek 
it all because of an unrequited love.
	I smile wryly at this. I've done just as much myself. It is just 
one of the many things that we have in common.
	The unrequited love that we share is what drew us together. 
We may not love the same person but we both know what it is to love 
and not have that love returned.
	She smiles slowly and her features turn angelic. I curl onto my 
side and move closer to her. Her fingers uncurl to gently touch my hair 
as she remains focused on the ceiling.
	"This is nice..." she begins quietly. "I feel peaceful."
	"Do you like feeling peaceful?"
	"Yes."
	Her head tilts to one side and we're gazing deeply into each 
others eyes. She continues to lazily play with my hair.
	"Don't you?"
	I slowly consider this. Do I like feeling peaceful? I've hardly 
ever experienced it so I'm not really sure. I try to remember the one 
time that I had felt peaceful and when I do my jaw tightens.
	"No... it makes me feel more dead than alive. I'd rather be 
fighting than be at peace."
	A weary sigh fills the air and she turns away from me to look 
at the ceiling again. Have I upset her? Just as I'm about to ask her this 
she then says.
	"I used to be angry too. Sometimes I still feel that anger inside 
me but lately it's gone away."
	"Why?"
	My quiet question echoes in the air and she pauses before 
turning to meet my gaze. Her eyes crinkle around the edges as she 
stops playing with my hair.
	"Because of you," she replies. "You make me feel at peace. 
You take that anger away."
	I can feel my body freeze and the air leave my lungs. Never 
did I expect to hear this from her. I'm not sure how to take it but I am 
sure that I've never felt so alive.
	She sighs again and looks at the ceiling as she says.
	"You're still angry. I wish that I could make you feel at peace 
as well. It doesn't seem fair somehow." She forms a wry smile and 
continues, "But when has life been fair?"
	Remaining silent I study her closely and my eyes are drawn to 
her exposed neckline. It's missing... it's gone... did she get rid of it? 
No, she would never get rid of it.
	"Juri..." Her green eyes lock on me and I continue hesitantly, 
"What happened to your locket?"
	"It's gone," she replies simply. "I have no need of it. With you 
at my side I no longer want her around my neck."
	I stare at her in confusion and she chuckles. Her touch is light 
and tender against my cheek.
	"That necklace was like my own personal hangman's noose. It 
locked me in subservience to her. Well, I'm sick of that role and I've 
changed it. I'm her equal now. No," she says firmly and her eyes 
sparkle. "I'm her superior."
	"You're her Sempai," I say with quiet humor.
	She looks at me with surprise before she chuckles. "Yes," she 
says as she curls my hair around her fingers. "You could say that's 
what I am." She smiles then adds, "I'm also your Sempai as well."
	There is a long moment of silence and she turns away to look 
at the ceiling. I watch her while I silently wonder just what is so 
interesting about that damn ceiling.
	"Nanami?"
	In her voice lies a question and it tugs at my heart because it is 
said with such aching innocence. I hadn't thought she had it in her but 
she does. We all have innocence hiding deep within us. Even if we try 
to destroy it, innocence will always survive.
	It's part of human nature I suppose.
	"Yes?"
	We're gazing deeply into each other's eyes and her hands rest 
beside my face. I slowly reach out to her and she smiles.
	"Do you still love him?"
	I ponder this carefully. Do I still love him? I've always loved 
him. Always. For so long he has been the center of my world just like 
she has been the center of hers. But do I still love him? After all that 
he's done do I still love him?
	"Yes."
	She squeezes her eyes shut and I clasp her hand tightly. 
"Please don't," I say in an soft order. "I love him but not like that. Not 
anymore. I swear it."
	Her eyes open and she looks up at the ceiling again. This time 
I follow her action and I note that nothing's there. Has she been 
counting the dots? Probably not.
	The two of us stare at the ceiling together and with the scent of 
roses wafting in the air I can feel myself relax. Slowly a sense of well 
being sets over me and I know exactly what she spoke of earlier.
	Right now, while I'm with her I finally feel loved.
	Loved and at peace.

-End-

Both characters in this fanfiction are from Revolutionary Girl Utena. I 
know what you're thinking. Juri and Nanami?! No I'm not trying to 
pair Juri up with every available female in the series. Actually, what 
caused this was a pondering about how their unrequited love in 
regards to Shiori and Touga is slightly similar. That and I saw this 
picture of the two of them in bed at the Yahoo Club: Shoujo Kakumei 
Utena. I linked to this club below so you can go to the picture gallery 
and see what inspired this madness. Now I'm off to pair Juri with 
someone else. How about Kozue? Or Wakaba? Hmm... 

Send comments to: Dreiser1@ix.netcom.com

Chat with me on ICQ! My ICQ # is: 37674780 

Thanks to Red Death all my fanfics are archived at:
http://www.lvdi.net/~reddeath/dreiser.htm

The Juri & Nanami pix that caused this is found at:
http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/shoujokakumeiutena

"I try to make the best of the situation before I finally go insane. Please 
don't say that we'll never find a way or tell me that all my love's been in 
vain."
-Eric Clapton-