Black Rose, Blue Thunder:
An Altered Destiny

By: Dreiser

-Four-


	"What do you mean Kasumi slept in?" Soun asked. "She never 
sleeps in! Is she sick? That's it isn't it? My baby is sick!" He 
immediately burst into tears as Nabiki watched him in certain 
exasperation.

	Across from Soun and still playing shogi Genma said 
carelessly, "She didn't cook dinner last night either."

	Reading this out of the corner of his eye Soun began sobbing 
louder as he cried, "He's right! Kasumi never misses cooking a meal! 
She is sick!"

	Sighing at this Nabiki said, "She's not sick Daddy. I swear. 
She's just sleeping in that's all. Kasumi does so much for us that we 
can allow her that, can't we?"

	"Yeah Dad," Akane chimed in happily as she walked into the 
room holding a tray full of a strange gooey substance that was 
somehow burnt and reeking of toxins. "Let Kasumi sleep in. Besides, 
I've cooked enough food for all of us!"

	At this Soun began wailing again and Nabiki let loose a heavy 
sigh. She rose to her feet and said, "Try to calm Daddy down Akane. 
I'm going to go check on Kasumi."

	Walking upstairs she wondered what became of her business 
partners. Ranma and Kodachi hadn't returned ever since the antics of 
the naked girl who was otherwise known as Perfume. Still mulling over 
this, Nabiki paused at the door to Kasumi's bedroom.

	Knocking on the door, Nabiki said, "Oneechan? Are you 
feeling okay?"

	When she got no response Nabiki hesitantly opened the door 
but when she got it halfway open she froze in clear shock. She then 
slowly backed out of the doorway and mechanically walked down the 
hall to stand at the top of the stairs. Once she'd done this, Nabiki 
proceeded to release a scream at the top of her lungs.

	In seconds, her father was in front of her wearing a worried 
expression. Walking lazily behind him was Genma who appeared 
vaguely curious about her yelling.

	"What is it?!" asked Soun in a rush. "Is something wrong 
Nabiki?! Where's Kasumi?!"

	Unable to give a response, Nabiki simply turned to point at the 
open door to Kasumi's bedroom. Dashing down the hallway in a rush, 
the dojo occupants piled in front of the door to take it a sight that 
caused all their eyes to go wide.

	Lying on the bed entwined in an embrace were the forms of 
Kasumi and Perfume. The blanket covered their bodies so it was hard 
to tell whether they were naked or not but the scene itself was 
incriminating. The Enforcer slowly popped open one sapphire eye and 
reluctantly she untangled herself from Kasumi to stare at the group.

	"What you do here?" asked Perfume blearily. She moved into 
a sitting position and the sheet fell to reveal a crumpled robe.

	The group found themselves much like Nabiki in their loss of 
speech. They simply stared at the Enforcer who was perplexed about 
their reactions.

	After a long silence, Nabiki recovered from her shock and 
pushed past the group to stalk into the room. "What have you done to 
Kasumi?! You... you... molester!" she shouted.

	"Molester?" Perfume blinked in confusion. "What you talking 
about? Kasumi is Airen. Supposed to sleep with."

	The middle Tendo sister was twitching in rage when suddenly 
the onset of loud sobbing was heard and she didn't have to turn around 
to know who it was. Soun was clinging helplessly to the door frame as 
he wailed, "Kasumi! My baby's been deflowered!"

	Behind him a nonchalant Genma shrugged and said, "It had to 
happen eventually."

	Just as Soun set about strangling Genma for saying that a 
puzzled Akane stuck her head into the room and said, "What're you all 
doing in here? You haven't even tried some of my special breakfast 
yet." Following their stares she focused on the bed and the figure of 
Perfume. "Hi again!" said Akane cheerfully. "It looks like you're 
recovered."

	It was then that Kasumi finally woke up and on seeing the 
group gathered in her bedroom she pulled the sheets closer to her 
body. With wide eyes she realized the position that she had just been 
caught in and what everyone must be thinking. Realizing all this, 
Kasumi could say only one thing about the situation.

	"Oh my."

---

	"Nine hundred and fifty thousand yen," Ranma counted as he 
sifted through the large wad of money in his hand. "Not too bad for a 
few hours of work."

	"How right you are my dearest," said Kodachi while hooking 
her arm in his. "What shall we be doing with our earnings? Perhaps use 
it to allay our resident stalker?"

	"Maybe," mused Ranma. He looked up into the air as he 
stuffed the money into his pocket. "But only if she won't get off our 
backs. I don't like the idea of giving money away for no reason."

	"A most apt point," murmured Kodachi. "I agree that we 
should only make retribution if she continues to act in a violent manner 
towards us. It serves no real purpose to allow her to upset the Tendos 
on our behalf. Don't you agree about that, Ranma darling?"

	"Yeah," Ranma said slowly. "The last thing we want is for 
Tendo-san to kick us out. Especially when we're getting so close to 
figuring everything out."

	"That reminds me," said Kodachi as she looked at him with 
hopeful violet eyes. "Did you have any luck in locating my brother's 
family services caseworker?"

	"It's the funniest thing," said Ranma. "The guy said that Kuno 
got adopted by some British lady and only a month afterwards they 
just disappeared without a trace." Cobalt eyes met Kodachi's gaze and 
he continued, "I know that nothing bad happened to him because he 
was fine when I met him back in middle school but this is just weird. I 
can't figure who this lady is or what she has to do with Kuno."

	 Forming a thoughtful expression, Kodachi said, "It seems that 
my brother has found a generous benefactor to care for him. How very 
fortuitous."

	"For him or us?" asked Ranma with a sly smile.

	"For both, of course," replied Kodachi as she matched his 
smile before giving him a soft kiss on the lips.

	When she pulled away, Ranma's smile widened as he repeated 
smoothly, "Of course."

---

	"My little girl is a lesbian!" Soun bawled.

	"So she likes to eat fish," remarked Genma who was soon 
being strangled again by an enraged Soun.

	Before Soun could do any real damage to the other man 
Nabiki gave a sigh and rose to her feet then in a casual movement she 
dumped a bucket of cold water on them. The reaction was immediate, 
Soun calmed down and Genma morphed into a big fat flying pig.

	While Perfume began snickering at Genma's cursed form 
Kasumi looked to the shivering Soun.

	"Father," said Kasumi with a pained expression. She fingered 
her crumpled dress that she had slept in. "I do wish that you wouldn't 
say things like that. I've already told you that we didn't do anything."

	"Airen," said Perfume as she ripped her eyes away from 
Genma pig. The Enforcer had abandoned the terrycloth robe from 
earlier and was wearing one of Akane's spare volleyball uniforms. 
"Why he so upset?"

	Scowling at this question Nabiki interrupted her older sister 
and said, "Maybe he's upset because he caught you in bed with my 
Oneechan! You... you... evil seductress!"

	"I think they make a nice couple," said Akane as she smiled 
widely. She turned to Perfume and continued, "I also think that having 
Amazons for in laws would be cool!"

	"Much thanks," said Perfume to the smiling Akane.

	"No prob," Akane called. She left the sitting room to return 
shortly with a kettle of hot water. Pouring it on Genma pig's head she 
said, "It's a good thing that we had this sitting on the stove, huh 
Ojisama Saotome?"

	While the steam evaporated to reveal his human form Genma 
straightened his glasses and said, "Thank you Akane."

	"No prob," repeated Akane in chipper tones as she left the 
sitting room for the kitchen again.

	"Now," said Genma in solemn tones as he looked to Soun. "I 
think you should stop making such a big fuss out of this Tendo. We've 
dealt with Amazons before so stop acting like this sort of thing is new 
to you. And just look at the situation I have with my wives."

	As Soun considered his words Nabiki looked at Genma 
suspiciously. "Wives?" she asked. "What are you talking about?"

	Wearing a definite smirk Genma folded his arms across his 
chest and said, "Just the details of my personal life." Nabiki narrowed 
her eyes at this reply and Genma turned his attention back to Soun. 
"So," he began. "You calmed down about this yet?"

	"Yes," said Soun in grating tones of annoyance. "I was never 
that upset. It was just that seeing my little girl like that was..." He 
trailed off as he focused his gaze on Kasumi and Perfume. There was a 
long moment of tension as Soun gave Perfume a hard stare. Then 
suddenly, he slammed his hands down on the table. "I must know 
now! Will you vow to always treat my Kasumi well?!"

	"Yes," said Perfume with a short nod. "I give you my solemn 
vow to always treat Kasumi well. If I don't I'll let you kill me," she 
finished in grave tones.

	"Excuse me?" said Kasumi in disbelief as she watched this odd 
pact being made between her father and Perfume.

	Before she could say anything more on the matter Soun broke 
out into a wide smile and quickly leapt across the table to pull Perfume 
into a hug. "Then welcome to the family!" he exclaimed happily.

	"Yeah!" Akane cheered as she mimicked her father and began 
to hug the Amazon Enforcer also. "Welcome!"

	At this display, Nabiki scowled and Kasumi watched with 
wide eyes as her new Airen started to turn purple from the lack of 
oxygen caused by the multiple hugs. Nabiki was about to comment 
when a soft voice said, "Nabchan."

	Nabiki moved her hazel gaze towards the voice and saw 
Ranma's head hanging upside down outside of the sitting room. He 
gave a silent gesture towards the roof before his head disappeared.

	She had just risen to her feet when Perfume finally succeeded 
in freeing herself from the confines of the Tendo group hug. Standing 
up, Perfume produced her double bladed axes and brushed past 
Nabiki to stand on the porch. With a swift leap she vanished from sight 
then seconds later the figure of Ranma came bounding down from the 
roof with Kodachi hot on his heels. Trailing after them was Perfume 
with the same deadly intent as day before.

	"Demon thieves!" Perfume shouted as she pursued the couple. 
"You not escape!"

	"Well this is fun," said Nabiki in dry tones. "It looks like your 
little wife is trying to kill Ranma and Dachi again."

	Kasumi observed the pursuit with wide eyes before she 
cleared her throat and said what could be construed as harsh tones for 
her, "Perfume! Stop it right now!"

	Immediately, the Amazon Enforcer froze in her tracks and 
seeing their opportunity for escape, Ranma and Kodachi disappeared 
from the premises once again. Perfume scowled at this and walked 
towards Kasumi with a dark expression on her pretty features.

	"This best be important, Airen," said Perfume.

	"Oh it is," said Kasumi in soft tones that somehow held a hint 
of steel. "Perfume," she began slowly. "You will stop attacking Ranma 
and Kodachi. They are guests of my family and as such you should 
treat them with respect."

	"Stop?" Perfume repeated incredulously. "They is demon 
thieves. Is my sacred duty to--"

	"Destroy them, yes I know," said Kasumi. She paused to 
produce the booklet of Amazon law from the folds of her dress. "That 
may be true but I'm your Airen. I was the one who defeated you in 
battle and that means I'm the dominant partner in this relationship. 
Which also means that you have to do what I tell you to. And I'm 
telling you to leave Ranma and Kodachi alone. If you don't I'll have 
to..." She trailed off with a thoughtful expression. Finally Kasumi 
settled on saying in ominous tones, "Punish you."

	With that, Kasumi turned on her heel and left a stunned 
Perfume standing in the sitting room. Akane crossed to the Enforcer's 
side and patted her on the shoulder.
	
	"Oneechan's pretty strict at times," offered Akane in 
sympathetic tones. While Perfume's sapphire eyes went wide in certain 
distress at this comment, Akane exclaimed, "It's time for school! I can't 
be late, not today!"

	"Strict," said Perfume dimly as Akane dashed out of the room 
with a stronger dose of her usual frenzy of energy.

	Shaking her head, Nabiki walked out of the room and said to 
herself, "Welcome to the family and good luck."

---

	"She was eating breakfast with them," murmured Kodachi in 
thoughtful tones. "How very... odd."

	"Odd? That's damn weird," said Ranma with a snort.

	The pair had made a quick run to escape from the Tendo dojo 
and were already halfway towards Furinkan. It would be the first time 
since they'd enrolled that they would be early for class. They always 
left in time for class but lately the crowd of their admirers, which was 
compounded by the fact that they walked to school with Akane, 
caused them some problems. That was simply because of the time that 
it took for them to maneuver through the crowd.

	Maneuver through the crowd and try to retain the clothes on 
their backs. Somehow they always seemed to lose bits of their clothes. 
Well, not lose. More like bits of their clothes always seemed to be torn 
from their bodies.

	Yes, that was definitely a more apt description. It was lucky 
for Ranma and Kodachi they didn't have any issues with their body 
persona or nudity. Very lucky indeed.

	"I'm sure that they had a good reason for welcoming her into 
their home," said Kodachi.

	"Yeah," Ranma replied as he shoved his hands into the 
pockets of his pants. "But what could it be?"

	Kodachi was about to reply when her violet eyes focused 
ahead on the Furinkan High front lawn. She froze in place and 
observing her behavior, a curious Ranma followed her gaze. He could 
only blink at what he saw.

	A totally empty lawn.

	No one was there. Not a single student. Not even a school 
security guard. Nobody. It was so empty that there might as well have 
been a tumbleweed crossing the lawn to signify just how empty it was.

	"This day is getting odder by the moment," remarked Kodachi 
as she inclined her raven head to one side.

	Giving a silent nod, Ranma echoed, "Yeah."

	The couple was still standing at the entrance to the school 
when seconds later, a strong wind kicked up and Akane went rushing 
past them. Her ponytail flying in the wind, Kodachi stared at the large 
dust cloud that had been left in Akane's wake and said, "Odd."

	"Very," said Ranma.

---

	Perfume was unhappy.

	She didn't enjoy being yelled at. Especially by her new Airen. 
And especially for only doing her duty as the Enforcer of Joketsuzoku. 
Why couldn't Kasumi understand that and let her kill the demon 
thieves already?

	Forming a grimace, Perfume considered killing the demon 
thieves against Kasumi's orders but thought better of it. Akane had 
said that Kasumi had a tendency to be strict and there was the 
ominous way that her Airen had said the word punish.

	Punish. The word echoed in Perfume's mind and she shivered 
at the thought. Yes, she'd obey her Airen's orders.

	For now.

	"Perfume," called Kasumi as she walked out of the kitchen 
wiping her hands on her apron. "I need to buy a few things. Would you 
like to go shopping with me?"

	Her sapphire eyes scanned Kasumi's features and finding 
nothing but kindness there, Perfume replied, "Yes. I like that, Airen."

	"Good," murmured Kasumi with a smile.

---

	Furinkan High was frozen with fear. It was the most horrifying 
time of year. It was the time that everyone dreaded coming about. It 
was the time of the apocalypse.

	It was time for the home economics midterm.

	On this one day more than ninety percent of the students called 
in sick and it was nearly impossible to get enough substitutes for all of 
the teacher absences. Because of the tendency for missing students 
and teachers, the few who did show up for school were all placed in 
the same room.

	All in all, there were fifteen people in the home economics 
class. Twelve of them wore anxious expressions, two of them just 
looked confused, and one of them had a wide smile gracing her pretty 
features.

	"I don't get it," said Ranma as he looked at Nabiki. "What's 
the big deal about Akane cooking some food? That don't sound so 
scary to me."

	"You haven't eaten it," Nabiki whispered her hazel eyes 
darkening with a grim light.

	"I'm sure this is all an exaggeration," said Kodachi. "How bad 
could Akane-chan's cooking possibly be?"

	That was when a knock sounded on the classroom door and a 
man, or what looked like a man, walked into the room wearing a 
yellow biohazard suit and holding a huge metal briefcase of sorts. The 
man looked at his clipboard then glanced up and waved at the class.

	"Hey everybody," the man said in muffled tones. "Looks like 
it's that time of year again." He paused to look at Akane who was 
putting on her apron as the home economics teacher watched her with 
a wary expression. 

	Akane turned around and broke into a wide smile. 
"Hasamato!" she exclaimed. "I didn't know you'd be here! Are the 
Furinkan High ghosts back again?"

	"Yeah, well, some hauntings never go away you know," said 
Hasamato as he gave a muffled laugh that was altogether anxious. 
"These darn ghosts. So what are you cooking this time, Akane-chan?"

	"Ramen," said Akane with a wide smile. She paused to form a 
troubled expression. "You don't think that it might be possessed by 
demons like my other meals, do you?"

	"You can never be too careful," Hasamato said solemnly. 
"That's why they called me. To make sure that you're safe, Akane-
chan. Now you just go on and cook."

	"Okay, Hasamato!" said Akane brightly before she turned 
back to her home economics teacher.

	"Possessed ramen?" Kodachi asked softly.

	"Shh," hissed Hasamato in muffled tones. He leaned down to 
face her and said, "That's the cover story we've been using for the past 
two years. Unless you want to be the one to tell Akane-chan the truth 
about her cooking."

	At this statement Kodachi and Ranma exchanged a wary look 
and Hasamato said, "That's what I thought." He then took a seat at the 
table across from them. When he sat down he put the metal briefcase 
he held on the floor and it caused an echoing thud throughout the 
classroom. Hasamato looked at Nabiki and smiled through the plastic 
mask and said, "How're you doing Nabiki? It's been awhile."

	"I'm good," said Nabiki with a smile. She leaned down to peer 
at the briefcase. "So that's your advanced metal alloy container, huh? 
Are you sure that this one won't melt like the old one did? We can't 
have a repeat of the curry disaster."

	"I'm positive," Hasamato assured. He paused to slap the 
briefcase and said, "This baby has held up under nuclear radiation 
testing. We think it can handle Akane-chan's cooking."

	Hearing this comment, Ranma and Kodachi paled.

---

	"Nerima?" asked Tatewaki with wide eyes. "My sister has 
journeyed to Nerima?"

	"According to this letter from Perfume," Cologne replied. "Is 
there something particularly important about that district in Tokyo?"

	Snapping out of his dazed state Tatewaki offered an 
apologetic smile. "It is the location of our former dwellings," he said 
earnestly. "The ancestral home of my deceased mother. The illustrious 
Kuno Mansion."

	"Nerima, huh?" said Ryoga thoughtfully. "My house is around 
that area."

	"Nerima is that way," said Shampoo. She looked up from the 
large map of Japan she was holding and pointed off into the distance. 
"If hurry can be there soon."

	"Then let's be off," said Tatewaki strongly. "We can't allow 
Perfume to complete her mission!" Suddenly he leapt into the air and 
began running on the rooftops on his way towards Nerima.

	Shampoo watched his departure and shook her head as she 
murmured, "Perfume not be so easily stopped. It take much to keep 
her from completing mission."

	But seconds later she was racing after him with Ryoga running 
at her side. Wearing a secret smile Cologne chuckled to herself before 
she followed after her young companions on their way to Nerima.

---

	Forming a face of annoyance, Perfume rubbed her nose and 
wished that it would stop itching. She found it quite bothersome to feel 
as if she was going to sneeze but then not do it. It was almost like her 
body was toying with her.

	With a sigh, she rocked back on her heels and watched with 
attentive sapphire eyes as Kasumi scanned the contents of the shelf 
with expertise. Quietly walking towards Kasumi's side, Perfume 
asked, "This what you do?"

	"What?" asked Kasumi in pleasant tones as she turned to look 
at Perfume. She smiled at the Enforcer then said, "I'm sorry, I didn't 
hear what you said. What was that?"

	"This what you do?" repeated Perfume. "Airen is care taker of 
family, yes? This what you do each day?"

	"Most of the time," Kasumi acknowledged. "The family needs 
to eat so I buy their food."

	"And Kasumi cook food also," continued Perfume. "And 
Kasumi clean house, and Kasumi take care of all other things in house 
no one else want do."

	"Of course," said Kasumi as if it were impossible for anyone to 
assume otherwise.

	Scowling at this, Perfume shoved her hands into her pockets 
and grumbled, "Is not right. Airen of Enforcer should not do such 
things." Looking up with fierce sapphire eyes she said, "You is 
powerful figure in tribe now. This mean is able to have life of choosing. 
Not one of servant. You should go back home to tribe with me, then 
all be well."

	"Perfume," said Kasumi softly. She smiled as she put the box 
of cereal in the basket that she held. "It isn't like that at all. I do all this 
because it makes me happy."

	"How that possible? You doing their work," Perfume said as 
she eyed Kasumi with clear skepticism.

	"Oh my," Kasumi sighed. "I don't know how exactly to explain 
this..." She was silent for a long while before her eyes lit up and she 
said, "Nothing makes me happier than helping others and making them 
happy. And by caring for my family I see that in them every day. Do 
you understand?"

	Studying Kasumi closely, Perfume folded her arms over her 
chest and said gruffly, "Understand but not like it. To care for others 
make Kasumi happy. This is good but at same time it keep you from 
having life of own."

	"What?" whispered Kasumi as her eyes widened in shock. 
"What do you mean by that, Perfume?"

	"I mean what say," retorted Perfume. She gave a sharp gesture 
towards the shelf and said, "This duty you have which make you happy 
is trapping also! It no let you do what want, you lose your want in their 
wants! Is no good!"

	There was a long moment of silence as Kasumi contemplated 
these words and several frightened shoppers scurried past the strange 
couple. Perfume was scowling deeply and had her arms folded across 
her chest.

	"Perfume," said Kasumi slowly as she looked up at the 
Amazon Enforcer. "Would you tell me more... about how you do 
things back in your tribe?"

	Sapphire eyes widened in surprise then Perfume broke out into 
a wide smile as she said, "Of course, Airen."

	Maybe she did have a chance of winning Kasumi over. But the 
first thing she'd have to do was make sure that her Airen stopped 
coddling her family so much. If she broke the odd dependence Kasumi 
had for caring for them then she'd have more a chance to convince her 
Airen to leave this odd country so they could return home to the tribe.

	And that was something Perfume desperately wanted.

	After she killed the demon thieves, of course.

---

	"And my American style apple pie?" asked Akane with wide 
plaintive brown eyes.

	"Possessed also," Hasamato replied in solemn but still muffled 
tones. "You know how these American foods, are Akane-chan. 
They're just too decadent, they attract ghosts."

	Hasamato then picked up the charred pie that somehow was 
still bubbling over with blue goop with a pair of steel tongs before 
putting it in his metal briefcase with the rest of Akane's cooking 
projects. The rest of the room watched their interaction with wide eyes 
as they silently thanked the man that was saving them from having to 
eat what Akane had cooked.

	"His acting is impeccable," murmured Kodachi softly. "I almost 
believe as if the food were truly possessed. Has he ever considered 
doing into the field of entertainment?"

	"The Sun Never Sets," replied Nabiki lowly as she leaned 
towards the gymnast. "It's on the late afternoons. He plays the 
honorable, but always drunken, doctor Ozuma."

	"So he's not a hazmat worker then?" Ranma asked 
incredulously while he kept his eyes on Hasamato.

	Nabiki shook her head at this and said, "No. He used to but 
went freelance. The school hires him out to take care of Akane's 
cooking projects. I hear they pay him nicely."

	"I would think so," Kodachi said. She was giving Hasamato a 
look of admiration before she turned to Ranma and smirked. "What do 
you think, Ranma darling? Should we get you one of those suits?"

	 "Nah," said Ranma slowly. "They'd cover up my handsome 
figure and then where would I be?"

	Rolling her eyes at this comment, Nabiki watched as her 
younger sister morosely observed as the last of her cooking was 
placed in the metal briefcase. "We just don't have the heart to tell her 
that it's bad," said Nabiki. "At times I've tried but she gets this look... 
like you just kicked her puppy dog or something and then it's all over. 
That's why most of the students aren't here today. They see that look 
of hers and then they volunteer to eat her cooking. Last year Akane 
inadvertently caused most of our freshman class to be hospitalized for 
a semester. It wasn't pretty."
	 
	"Huh," said Ranma thoughtfully. He got a strange look in his 
eyes before he looked at Nabiki and wore his usual charming smile as 
he asked, "So what do we do now?"

	Looking at him with solemn eyes, Nabiki said, "We help with 
the clean up." Rising to her feet she slapped Ranma on the shoulder 
and said, "Lucky you, Saotome. You'll be able to wear that biohazard 
suit after all."

	Ranma's only response was to look miserable.

---

	"This is Nerima?" asked Ryoga blankly. He scratched his head 
and murmured, "It doesn't look all that bad to me. No fighting, no 
explosions. I wonder where all those rumors about it being worse than 
Tomobiki came from?	

	"I don't know what you're speaking of, Ryoga-kun," said 
Tatewaki. "Nerima is a fine district to live in and I recall it as being 
perfectly normal when I resided here as a child."

	Before Tatewaki could say anything more on the matter a 
truck with the words 'Akane-chan's Volunteer Biohazard Unit' written 
on the side of it went blazing past them on the road leaving them 
stunned in its wake.

	After a moment, Ryoga said, "What was it that you just said 
about Nerima being normal, Tachi?"

	Tatewaki gave a nervous laugh and Shampoo rolled her eyes 
at this before she found her attention drawn away by a couple walking 
past. The woman leading the two had an understated beauty about her 
with her long brown hair and warm tone of voice but she wasn't the 
one who had caught Shampoo's attention. Rather, it was the woman's 
companion whose face was completely covered the massive pile of 
bags that she was holding that intrigued Shampoo so.

	Intrigued Shampoo because of what exactly the woman 
carrying the bags was saying. And what was she saying?

	Well, she was saying a long line of very... descriptive and 
extensive vulgarities in Mandarin.

	And Shampoo knew of only one person that knew of so many 
vulgarities and would sound so happy while saying them.

	"Perfume!" shouted Shampoo as she silently prayed that she 
was right about this.

	The woman with the bags slowly turned around and said in 
muffled tones, "Shampoo? Is that you, Cousin?"

	Shampoo formed a wide smile as she watched Perfume lower 
the bags to reveal her face. She'd found Perfume and now they could 
help Tatewaki rescue his sister from receiving her sentence.

	If it hadn't been delivered already.

	The only real question remaining in Shampoo's mind was this: 
Why was Perfume carrying that woman's groceries?

---

	"Nerima," said Mousse as she read a road sign for the first 
time in years without having to stand millimeters away from it. She 
pulled away and scratched the back of her long head of luxurious 
black hair while her face formed a most adorable look of 
contemplation. "Now why would Shampoo want to come here? It 
doesn't look all that special."

	Mousse was still considering this when she turned around to 
return to following after Shampoo only to find that she was surrounded 
by a mob of starry eyed guys.

	"Uhm... hello?" Mousse said in hesitant tones which only 
served to make her cuter. "Can I help you?"

	"Ah! She's just as cute as Akane-chan!" one of the guys in the 
mob shouted out.

	"Blasphemer!" another guy shouted. "No one can possibly be 
as cute as Akane-chan!"

	"Oh yeah?" the first guy replied. "Check her out!"

	There was a slight pause then the second and more skeptical 
guy said in awe, "No way! You're right, she is as cute as our beloved 
Akane-chan!"

	"Akane-chan?" Mousse echoed. "Who's Akane-chan?"

	"Ah! She doesn't know Akane-chan!" another guy shouted in 
tones of utter shock. "She must be new here!"

	"I wonder if she can cook better than Akane-chan?"

	"Everyone cooks better than Akane-chan!"

	"I say we worship her like Akane-chan!"

	"Yes, worship her!"

	"What's your favorite color?!"

	"And your astrological sign?!"

	"Don't forget about her blood type!"

	The mob's shouting got louder and louder as they continued to 
close in on an entirely shocked Mousse.

	"What?" squeaked Mousse as she backed away from the mob 
very nervously. "What're you talking about?"

	And that was when the mob descended upon her.

---

	"So you're Perfume's Airen," said Cologne as she gave 
Kasumi a close inspection with her eyes. "That would explain why she 
was hauling your groceries around for you."

	"Yes, it would," Kasumi said pleasantly. "I asked Perfume to 
help me with my shopping and she was very kind to do so. I take it 
that you're Perfume's Great Grandmother?"

	The group had all made their way back to the Tendo dojo and 
were gathered in the sitting room discussing current events that 
included Perfume's newly formed engagement.

	"Yes," Cologne said with a nod. "I am Cologne. Am I right in 
assuming that you were the one who managed to stop Perfume from 
fulfilling her mission here?"

	"You would," replied Kasumi. "You see, the people that you 
sent Perfume to kill are guests of my family and it wouldn't be polite to 
allow them to be killed."

	Quirking an eyebrow, Cologne said, "No. I suppose that it 
wouldn't." Looking to Perfume she continued, "You've made a most 
interesting choice in Airen, Perfume."

	"Why thank you," said Kasumi with a smile. She looked to 
Tatewaki and said, "But you don't look like an Amazon. May I ask 
why you're here?"

	"Eh? Me?" asked Tatewaki in distracted tones. "I am here with 
Ryoga-kun to..." He trailed off as he looked around the sitting room 
and said, "Where's Ryoga-kun?"

	"I think maybe he get lost again, Tatewaki," said Shampoo as 
she wore a weary expression. "We not watch him close enough and he 
wander away. Is that so?"

	Heaving a deep sigh, Tatewaki hung his head and said, "And 
just when we were getting so close." He then said strongly, "I best go 
and find him. I can't let him wander aimlessly while his family waits 
here."

	Tatewaki had just turned to exit the sitting room when he was 
stopped by the figures of Soun and Genma returning from their usual 
afternoon trip to the bar.

	"Saotome-san," breathed Tatewaki in shock.

	"Tatewaki," echoed Genma in equally shocked tones. There 
was a moment of silence before Genma grabbed him by the collar and 
asked hurriedly, "Is he here?! Is Ryoga here?!"

	"He was," stammered Tatewaki through the fierce shaking that 
Genma gave him. "But he got lost..."

	"Lost?!" Genma roared. He released Tatewaki and looked 
deflated as he fell to his knees. "Not again."

	Kneeling next to him, Tatewaki said softly, "I'm sorry 
Saotome-san. I'll promise to find him..."

	Soun observed this odd scene for a moment, before he looked 
to Cologne and his eyes went wide. "You," he said in low tones. 
"What are you doing here?"

	"I'm looking for the one called Kuno Kodachi and her traveling 
companions," said Cologne. "And I believe that you might know 
something about that, Soun?"

	"Do you mean Ranma and Genma?" Soun blinked. "What do 
you want with them?"

	"Ranma?" repeated Cologne as she formed a face of interest. 
"And who would that be?"

	Looking utterly confused, Soun said, "He's Genma's son. 
What do you want with him and Kodachi?"

	"Nothing much, Soun," said Cologne solemnly. "We merely 
wish to tell your resident couple of thieves that they've been sentenced 
for death."

---

	"Ugh, that smell," muttered Ranma as he shuddered. "Remind 
me to never seem helpful again, Dachi."

	"Surely, my dearest," Kodachi said with a smile.

	The couple were slowly making their way back to the Tendo 
dojo as school had been let out early. Actually, school hadn't been let 
out early... they had merely let themselves out. After attempting to help 
Hasamato clean up Akane's cooking for a good five minutes both 
Ranma and Kodachi had become all too disgusted with the effort and 
decided to flee the school.

	When they had successfully done that, the couple began their 
way back to the dojo. Which was just what they were doing right 
now. Well, were doing until Ranma abruptly stopped walking causing 
Kodachi to stop also.

	"Ranma darling?" asked Kodachi in concern. "Is something the 
matter?"

	Not replying, Ranma kept his eyes focused ahead and 
following his gaze Kodachi saw that it lead to a boy wearing a huge 
backpack that had a red bamboo umbrella on the top of it. The boy 
stood alone in the middle of the street with a puzzled expression on his 
face. Ranma formed look of pure happiness as he ran towards the 
other boy and shouted, "Ryoga!"

	The boy turned around and upon seeing Ranma a huge smile 
crossed his features. "Ranma!" the boy shouted in return. Instantly he 
began running towards Ranma and when they met the two enveloped 
in a strong hug. It took them a minute to part but when they did they 
instantly began exchanging pleasantries.

	"What're you doing here Ryoga?" began Ranma in a rush of 
excitement. "I thought you were in Switzerland."

	"That was last month," replied Ryoga smiling. "I've been in 
China looking for you." He paused to smile wider as he said, "I'm sure 
glad that I found you! It seems like it's been forever!" He eyed Ranma 
then as he gave him a light punch on the shoulder. "You sure have 
grown runt." 

	"Runt?" Ranma scoffed. "Who're you calling a runt you 
blockhead? It doesn't matter that you're two months older than me 
now. I'm taller than you."

	"Whatever," dismissed Ryoga. "A year can do a lot to a 
person. So you had a growth spurt. Big deal."

	"A year," Ranma shook his head. "I can't believe it's been that 
long. I have a lot of stuff to tell you. But first I think there's someone 
here that you'll want to meet." He turned towards Kodachi who was 
observing them from a distance. "Dachi! C'mere! I have someone here 
that you'll wanna meet!" Ranma looked back to Ryoga and asked, "Is 
Kuno still traveling with you?"

	"Of course," said Ryoga in slight exasperation. "He's been 
trying to help me find you all this time. You already knew that. Why 
even ask--" Ryoga stopped talking when Kodachi reached them and 
he said softly, "You're Tachi's sister... you're Kodachi." He looked to 
Ranma and asked incredulously, "She's been with you all this time?"

	Ranma grinned as he gave a nod. "Yup! Kodachi's my 
girlfriend Ryoga. I've been helping her to find you and Kuno just like 
you've been helping him to find us."

	"Ranma darling," began Kodachi in tones that rang of quiet 
hope. "Then you mean that this is...?"

	"My brother Ryoga," Ranma affirmed. "And if he's here then 
Kuno must be nearby." His smile deepened as he looked into glowing 
violet eyes. "We finally found them. Our search is over."

	"Ranma darling..." breathed Kodachi loving tones.

	"Dachi..." echoed Ranma in turn.

	Ryoga watched the couple a moment before he decided to 
stop them before he got sick. Releasing a loud cough Ryoga woke the 
pair out of their daze. "So," he began. "How about the two of you help 
me find the Tendo dojo? I know that's where they went with Perfume. 
I was with them until I sorta got lost again," he said the last part 
sheepishly.

	"Perfume?" asked Ranma and Kodachi.

	"Yeah," said Ryoga. "That's the name of this Amazon warrior 
they sent to punish Kodachi and some other..." As he trailed off Ryoga 
gained a look of understanding. Wearing a deep frown he said, 
"Ranma! Did you steal something from their village?"

	Looking wounded, Ranma said, "Me? Would I do something 
like that?"

	"Ranma," growled Ryoga in warning tones.

	"Okay, okay," Ranma heaved a sigh. "We did some business 
with them that went bad. That's all."

	Ryoga groaned and rubbed his forehead. "I thought that 
Mother told you to stop doing that sort of thing!"

	"What she doesn't know won't hurt her," said Ranma easily. 
He gave Ryoga a slap on the back and started to walk in the direction 
of the Tendo dojo. "And I doubt that Mother will get angry. She 
knows all about Pop's rules of roughing it. We have to do and find 
everything on our own. That includes money for our supplies."

	"I guess so..." Ryoga said thoughtfully. "But I still don't think 
that Mother will like it."

	"Then Mom'll explain it to her," said Ranma with a shrug. 
"Don't worry so much bro. They forgive Pop each time he screws up 
so you know they're gonna forgive us."

	Ryoga was still mulling over this when they entered the 
grounds of the Tendo dojo. As the removed their shoes the sounds of 
loud sobbing met their ears. Wearing a wry expression Ranma said, 
"Sounds like Tendo-san is upset."

	Making no reply Kodachi walked past Ranma to the sitting 
room wearing a look of both anxiety and hope. Watching this with a 
face of concern Ranma quickly dashed after his girlfriend while Ryoga 
trailed behind them slowly.

	"Tendo," Ryoga said to himself. "I just know I've heard that 
name somewhere before."

---

	"Death!" shouted Soun through his tears. "What do you mean 
they're sentenced to death?! And what do you mean by calling Ranma 
and Kodachi a couple?! Ranma is supposed to marry one of my girls, 
it's been promised!"

	"Tatewaki," said Shampoo softly as she leaned in to whisper in 
his ear. "What he more upset over? Death sentence or fact demon 
thieves is a couple? Shampoo not know."

	"A couple," seethed Tatewaki who was turning a deep shade 
of red while he clenched his hands into fists. "My sister and that 
scoundrel Saotome? A couple?! I'll kill him..."

	"Eh... never mind," Shampoo murmured then she took a visible 
step away from Tatewaki who was still seething.

	Heaving a deep sigh, Cologne said, "For heavens sake calm 
down Soun. You know me. Do you really think that I'd sentence them 
both to death when I had the chance to gain something from this 
entirely unpleasant situation?"

	"Gain something?" repeated Genma suspiciously. He stood up 
and said, "What are you up to, old woman?"

	"Your son stole from my tribe," Cologne stated in cold and 
steely tones. "He and Kodachi both must make reparations for that. I 
think pledging themselves to our greater good would do just that. 
Wouldn't you think?"

	"What're you talking about?" Genma growled.

	"I've always wanted a Saotome on the side of the Amazons," 
said Cologne as she formed a slow smile. "And when Comb failed to 
marry you I was disappointed, Genma. But now it seems I've been 
presented with a chance to make up for that. Your son will pledge 
loyalty to myself and my tribe. He will become one of us. He will 
become an Amazon."

	"Really? No one told me about that."

	The group all turned to see the figure of Ranma standing in the 
doorway with Ryoga at his side and right in front of them was the wide 
eyed figure of Kodachi whose eyes were focused on the sight of her 
older brother.

	"Tatewaki," whispered Kodachi.

	"Kodachi," echoed Tatewaki.

	In seconds the two were exchanging a fierce hug for an 
embrace that had been years in the making. When they finally parted 
after a few minutes, Tatewaki wore a face of utter joy as he said, "I've 
missed you greatly, my sister."

	"And I you, my brother," Kodachi replied tearfully.

	The quiet moment of family reunion shattered by the loud shout 
of Genma as he cried out, "Ryoga!"

	"Dad!!" shouted Ryoga, whose eyes lit up when he saw 
Genma. He immediately went running towards the older man and 
embraced him in a bone crushing hug. "I've missed you Dad! How 
have you been?!"

	"I'm okay," Genma wheezed. "But I'm having a little trouble 
breathing here, son."

	Giving a nervous laugh, Ryoga released Genma from his hold 
and rubbed the back of his head. "Sorry Dad," said Ryoga as he 
smiled.

	"It's okay boy," said Genma cheerfully. "Everything is going to 
be okay now that you're here."

	"Really?" asked Ryoga in confusion. "How come?"

	"Never mind that," Cologne interrupted. "We have business 
with young Ranma here." She hopped closer to Ranma and Kodachi 
on her staff and said, "You do realize that you're both under Amazon 
death orders, do you not?"

	"Yeah, we realized," Ranma snorted. "But in case you haven't 
noticed your girl hasn't been doing the best job. We're still alive and 
kicking. What about that?"

	"Indeed," murmured Cologne. "Perfume had failed in killing 
you both but that hardly matters as I'm here to tell her that the death 
order has been revoked."

	"Revoked?" Kodachi repeated.

	"Ah, Kuno-san," said Cologne as she looked to Kodachi. 
"You have your brother to thank for that. He kindly asked for my 
leniency and I have decided to give it. But only under some conditions 
of course."

	"Of course," said Ranma as his gaze narrowed. He tilted his 
head to one side and said, "What'd you want?"

	Her eyes gaining a dangerous gleam, Cologne said, "I want all 
of our tribal treasures back."

	There was a long pause before Ranma gave a short 
incredulous laugh and said, "You're kidding! Is that all?"

	"Hardly," Cologne pronounced dryly. "I also want you both to 
pledge your complete and utter loyalty to myself and my tribe. You 
two will become my newest apprentices and you will promise to never 
bring harm to Joketsuzoku again. You will fight for us and not against 
us." She paused to ask, "What do you say to that?"

	There was another long pause of utter silence as Ranma and 
Kodachi exchanged a silent look. Together, they both turned back to 
Cologne and said, "Deal."

	Their words were met with a loud crash as everyone with the 
exception of them and Cologne went toppling over on the floor.

	It seems that wasn't the answer everyone had expected.

To be continued... 

All characters in this fanfiction are from Ranma 1/2. This fanfic was 
inspired by the works of the goddess Rumiko Takahashi but the 
craziness behind it is purely my own. I'd like to thank Jim Robert 
Bader and my brother Patrick for listening to my goofy ideas. Also 
special thanks to Wade Tritschler for allowing me to be a part of his 
Altered Destinies project.

Send comments to: Dreiser1@ix.netcom.com

Chat with me on ICQ! My ICQ # is: 37674780 

Thanks to Red Death all my fanfics are archived at:
http://www.lvdi.net/~reddeath/dreiser.htm

For previous chapters of BRBT visit Altered Destinies at:
http://www.fortunecity.com/lavendar/attenborough/249/index.htm

Next up: Ranma and Kodachi... the newest Amazons?! That and 
Ryoga finds himself taking up family obligations.

"A sarcastic bitch is like a Barbra Streisand CD: It yields 
unpleasantness for all within hearing range."
-Lao Ma from the UberXena story I've Been To Pocatello, But I've 
Never Been To Me by Vivian Darkbloom-