For Every Action Part 15
David Johnston, rgorman@telusplanet.net
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"No! Never! Not on your life!"
"You're bein' kinda negative," reproached Ranma as Akane poured the hot
water over her head, becoming a girl once again.
"It's perverted! Totally perverted! It's just the most
totally...absolutely...utterly-"
Ranma handed Akane's "female" clothes over as he warned, "You want your
family to hear? They're right past that wall you know." He turned his
back so she could change.
Instantly Akane's voice dropped to a fierce whisper. "-perverted idea
you've ever had! Worse than when you told Ryoga you loved him and you
wanted to marry him! My own sister! And don't you dare peek!"
"Pfeh. Like I'd-" Ranma stopped himself, not wanting to get
sidetracked. " You won't have to actually go out with her you know. I
got a brilliant plan."
"Ranma, you wouldn't know a brilliant plan if one tapdanced in front
you, singing 'brilliant plans are here again' and keeping time with a
hammer on yieeee!" She bashed reflexively, knocking the small
black-clad form away.
Happosai cheerfully bounced off a wall and landed on his feet as he
commented, "Not bad, not bad. I think your reflexes are improving,
Akane-chan. But you forgot something." He held up the blouse he'd
snatched from her hand.
"Get lost, freak," Ranma snarled as Akane, red-faced, snatched up the
shirt she'd borrowed from him and quickly slipped it back on. "Don't
you have nothin' better to do?"
"Surely you don't think that a pretty girl in Nerima can say 'pervert'
three times and not have me hear," the dirty old man boasted. "Now tell
me, just what was it that you were suggesting to Akane? Can I watch?"
"None 'a your business."
"Oh I'm making it my business, boy," Happosai's playful tone turned cold
and demanding as he reached into his bag of swag. "Tell me what I want
to know, or you'll get...this!" Dramatically he brandished a gun.
Ranma snorted. "Yeah right. I'm so scared." He crossed his arms
contemptuously.
Appalled, Akane watched as Happosai leveled the weapon. She could see
the glint of steely intent in Happosai's eyes. Her nerve snapped, and
she gave Ranma a hard shove, propelling him face first into a wall just
as Happosai's finger tightened on the trigger...
"Akane? What have I done?" Happosai said in a shocked whisper. "This
is...horrible. I never meant... Ranma! This is your fault!" He
shifted his aim and pulled the trigger again and again.
Ranma ignored the squirts of water as he turned on Akane. "What were
you thinking? If that had been a real gun you'd be dead, now!"
Akane's tenor voice answered defensively, "Well, excuuuse me for trying
to save your life, Mr. Ungrateful!"
"Didn't you think I knew what I was doing? Unlike some people, I can
tell the difference between a toy and the real thing."
"It was dark!"
Happosai dropped the water-pistol and began to cry. "My Ranma-chan, my
Akane-chan...how is this possible? Who would do such a horrible thing,
depriving an old man of the greatest joys in his life?"
Ranma looked at him for a moment, then answered, "Guy calling himself
"Mizu" switched the curse around."
"Fear not children! I, Happosai, Grandmaster of the Anything Goes
School of Martial Arts will avenge you and restore the way things should
be."
"Whatever."
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