Vincent Seifert <seifertv@ccshp1.ccs.csus.edu> wrote:
As Ryoga tells it, after a long and untraceable passage
through the tunnels beneath Mount Phoenix (1), he entered a
For Ryoga, "untraceable" pretty much goes without saying. :)
{The shift between Ranma's child's (son or daughter? You appear to have
carefully avoided specifying :) voice and Ryoga's is effective.}
The gender of little Oscar? Well, you see....
Seriously, what struck me about this was that we don't really learn
anything at all about the kid, other that that he/she is the child of
Ranma and Akane. (And even that is uncertain; Ranma and Kima could've
had a quickie right before the former went off into battle. ^_^)
In particular, we don't know how Junior feels about Ranma and about what
he did in this story -- obviously it has some significance to Junior, or
he/she wouldn't be bothering to research it, but whether his/her
attitude is one of resentment, hero worship, mere family obligation, or
something else isn't revealed. I for one would be interested in knowing
-- in part because it'd give me at least some idea of how Ranma is
remembered and thought of after the events of WUE.
Of course, it's possible you (Alan, not Vince) are telling us something
by not telling us anything (or rather, not having Junior tell us
anything.)
(4) This perception might well have been entirely true from
Ryoga's point of view; in the same way that a sphere of enormous
size (such as our planet) appears flat to an observer, a circle
of enormous size (a great river, sourced by its own self) could
appear as a straight line to an observer unable to see the whole
of it.
{I think you can omit this note without harm, but perhaps it fits the
narrator's idea of what's proper.}
I didn't really find the explanation here convincing. Not that what he
says couldn't happen, but it doesn't seem to jibe with the way Ryoga
described it. Then again, maybe it's not supposed to. Maybe it means
that Junior is too much of a rationalist, or just that Ryoga is lousy at
geometry. :)
Anyhow. great stuff, definitely a series that'll go down as one of the
classics in fanfiction, and I won't even bug you about doing a sequel
again. :p
Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics.html