On Wed, 05 Jan 2000 21:34:53 -0330 Matthew Maddocks
<maddocks@roadrunner.nf.net> writes:
Well here comes part 27, with my usual twists and turns. I hope you
enjoy it, send C&C, and vote for me and my stories in the awards this
year!
Like I said before, the only real competition is "Children of an Elder
God"...seeing as there's like only one R1/2 darkfic out right now.
Now onto the story! *_* ...............
......................................................................................................
Chapter 27: Mind's Reflection.
God looked over the memo again, and again, and again, trying to
absorb the truth. Alice was dead, shot through the chest. And from the
scene, the detectives said the murder was done by Ryan Mares, whose
body was lying next to Alice's.
The fact that you call this deity-being 'God' implies that it IS the
definite creator of all, as opposed to just creator of humankind. It
might be a little late for a name-change, but it would be appreciated if
you worked that in(not that I'm offended or anything; I'm really starting
to lean towards nihilism at this point).
It was a weird coincidence though, that Alice was murdered while
going to inspect the Church. At least that's what the leader of the base
said. He said that not long before she was killed, she signed out,
giving
her reason as going to investigate the church.
This paragraph needs some commas here and there.
Maybe the church was involved, and Alice's previous concerns were
correct. Maybe in memory of her, he would send a team to investigate
the church. And then see what happens. Yes, that's what he would do. He
would send out a scout team, just to see what was going on. But not
only that, but to monitor the church's response. And to see what
happens............
The last sentence needs something added.
And another example of the name 'God' not being fitting, as you would
think that God was omniscient or something. Then again, this isn't the
New Testament version of God.
I sat down on his bed, thinking over recent events. It was late,
Whose bed?
very late, and Sarah had already left. She insisted she had to go,
something about paper work given to her by the church. Whatever the
paperwork was about, I didn't know, and didn't want to ask.
Hmm. Lying on bed after spending night with girl...you have to wonder
what went on after dinner...*_*
"Douglas."
I turned around, for that was where the voice came from. I knew the
voice well, it was Lilith, how could I forget the voice of the one who
damned me to so much pain? "Go away! Or I will kill you."
I'd have thought that Douglas would attack on sight by now.
Lilith came out of her shadows. She wore her usual white dress and
had her red chair arranged in the same way as usual, just going down.
chair? eh? The chair description doesn't make sense.
She had a look in her eyes, on of pity and fear. But there was also hope
mixed in there. Hope for what though?
"Douglas, I came here to talk. Nothing more. Do you want to talk?"
It only took me a second to respond. "No."
A full second?
Lilith sighed as she looked at me with her now pity filled eyes.
"Please. I don't want to leave here without talking to you first."
I thought again for a second, and this time came up with a
different response. "Speak."
So Lilith spoke. "I came here, to beg for your soul, to plea with
you."
"What a waste of time. I don't want my soul back! It was a
bothersome thing, something that caused me pain. Why would I want
pain?"
"Why? I may not have the answer, but do you? It is in there, and it
wants to be found. Do you want to look? Or do you want to hide. Try to
find the answer. And if you do not, then I will give up my life to
you."
Yeah, she's dead for sure.
And with that I abruptly fell into uncounscience.......
unconscious
I awoke in the swirling darkness of my mind. The lonely, dark place
where my mind exists. It is a place of cold discomfort now, a place of
evil. I have no soul to warm the cold of my mind.
The mind...is a dark and lonely place...
Then two people appeared in front of me, about three meters in front
of me. One stood on the right and one stood on the left. The one on
the right was the Messiah part of me, the first person I met within my
subcounscience. While the one on the left was Mondo, the darkness that
lay within me.
Messiah = superego
Mondo = id
AFAIK.
Mondo was the first to talk. "Hello, welcome back to your mind. It's
been a long time."
Then the Messiah spoke. "And it has been even longer since you
talked to me."
"What do you want with me?"
Mondo quickly responded. "We want you to make a choice. Whether or
not to have your soul back or not. This new plea by Lilith has brought
'or not' is redundant, omit.
your mind into unrest. Now is the time to settle everything, once and
for all."
I nodded. "So what happens now?"
The Messiah snapped his fingers and smiled. "This." And he
vanished, as did Mondo.
The ground, whatever it was, began to shake. I was losing my
balance, having trouble staying up. But not long after they started,
they stopped, and a large cylinder shot up through the ground.
It was tall, about six meters, and wide, about five by five
meters. I stood in the center of this glass cylinder, and my reflection
was
cast all over the cylinder wall. Hundreds of images of me, large and
small
were spread out all over it, each one with a different expression.
OK, this is bizarre. (Not "Mokona Directs Softcore" bizarre, but very
"Call of Cthulhu"-bizarre. That's a good thing.)
Then the voices came from the reflections. "I want my soul."
Then another voice. "I hate the soul!"
And another. "It gives my life meaning."
They continued. "It strips me of pleasure."
"It's a friend that keeps me warm."
"It's an enemy that betrays me."
"It bothers me."
"It helps me."
"I'm lost with it."
"I'm lost without it."
"Why do I have it in the first place?"
"Why not have it?"
"What are the answers?"
"To the questions?"
"What do we live for?"
"Why?"
"Why?"
"Why?"
"We are asking you, Douglas. Why live? Life hurts you, life makes
fun of you. And then in cruelness it kills you. So why?"
"We want to know why? It had boggled people for years. Many have
answers, that satisfy the few, and maybe the many. But do the masses
matter to you? Or does what you think? People tell you to have a soul,
not to have one. To help and hurt people. But what do you want? It's
easy to listen to someone else, and do as they say. But it's hard to
think for yourself and stand up for what you believe in. And if you
only do what others say, then you are dead. Therefore, you are not
alive.
So tell us, why do you live? What are you going to do with your life, or
lack there of?"
And I then woke up...........
There's no sign that he had an answer.
My eyes focused in on the scene above me, it was my bedroom in the
church headquarters. And I was lying on my bed. Lilith was looking over
me with concern in her eye. "Are you okay?"
The world was a blur to me, my mind was in unrest. I could feel
something tear through my mind, as though a battle was being waged
within my own soul, or lack of one. The darkness and the light
fighting within me, fighting to obtain control.
And with this battle came great pain, pain which I had to release.
And so I pulled the powers from within myself, the magic. The ability
to exert ones will onto other objects. And I threw it all out, as though
it would eliminate the pain.
Sounds very much like the 'Shishi Hokodan' technique.
And when it was released, it struck Lilith straight in the chest,
ripping a hole straight through. And her blood flew out onto my face
and hands and clothes. I felt the red liquid land on my skin, and felt
it
trickle down my body.
I knew it! Very eurohorror of you.
I watched as Lilith's body fell to the floor, and I finally
snapped.
My mind fell into pieces at the sight of her body, and so I left. I
quickly teleported myself away, unable to stand the pain..........
.............................................................................................
Well I've got to my classic character killing spree. I wondered
whether or not to kill her, but I finally decided to. And that is that.
Well, nothing ties up a plot like a heavy body count. Remember that,
Ranma fanfic writers.
So please send C&C! And Until next time! *_*..........
Being the only one to C&C this fic, I'm CCin it to the ML. That's it for
now.
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