Subject: [FFML] [R1/2][shortfic]
From: DeAtHBoY9@aol.com
Date: 1/17/2000, 11:15 PM
To: ffml@fanfic.com

    By the time you all read this, I will be dead.  I know you don’t approve 
of my course of action, but it is what I wanted.  Please understand that.
    
    Why?  Why did I kill myself?  Well, I couldn’t take it anymore.  The 
woman I loved, the one person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, 
dead.  I cry.  Heh.  Me!  Crying!  I NEVER cry!  But here I am, crying for 
what I could never have.  Had I been more outgoing and much less nervous, I 
would have been able to tell her my feelings.  But, I couldn’t.  My father 
trained me in the martial arts, and when he did so he also trained me to 
bottle up my emotions.  “Emotions make you weak,” he’d always say.  Well, 
pop, that’s not true.  Lack of emotion makes you weak.  I hope you understand 
that now.

    Why did she have to die?  Saffron didn’t have to kill her!  I could have 
saved her!  But I was too late.  She died in my arms, yet still she eluded my 
grasp.  I will never forget the serene look on her face as I pronounced her 
dead, tears running down my face.  Hell, even Nabiki was crying.  I haven’t 
ever seen that happen before.  

    The funeral was the hardest for me.  When she was immortalized in the 
Tendo family shrine, I knew she’d never be back.  Until then I had harbored a 
faint hope that she was just pretending to get back at me for something I’d 
done before.  She was forever dead, and I wept.  I wept so fiercely that Mr. 
Tendo had to concede the ‘Eye Fountain’ award to me.  Heh.  I’m just trying 
to put a little humor into a bad situation.  I apologize if I come off as 
disrespectful.

    The night after the funeral, I decided to die.  I wrote this note, and I 
killed myself.  Heh.  It’s funny that I’m writing about something I’m doing 
right now in the past tense.  Anyway, I am now dead.  Forever gone.  And Gods 
willing, with Kasumi.  

    Ranma, thank you for trying to save her from Saffron, but he surprised 
you in your home as you slept.  I don’t blame you for anything.  Good luck 
with Akane. Everyone knows you love her.

    That’s all I wanted to say.

    
Dr. Ono Tofu


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