Hey,
Just something that popped into my head. Thought
I'd share it with the world.
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Have you ever had one of those days? You know,
one where you shouldn't have even taken a breath let
alone thought about getting out of bed? I have. I've
been having one of those days everyday since I was old
enough to walk.
I wish I could tell you all how I feel. Old
before my time. So helpless, so damn helpless. All I
say, all I do, seems only to work against me. No
matter how hard I try.
My life spins around me, a whirling dervish of
confusion and chaos. I try to keep it under control
but the harder I try the more hectic it gets, the more
people I draw in. Dear God the people. Innocent people
I drug into all of this. People I've cursed, hurt,
caused suffering to. The lives I've destroyed. I'd
appologize but what good are words, compared to the
damage I've done what, good are they?
If I could take it all back I swear I would. I'd
give it all back to you, everything I've taken or cost
you. I'd give it all back and then some. If only I
could. I'd give anything to have a quiet, peacefull
life. One where there aren't any marrages arranged ,
without rivals, without craized, hairbrain schemes.
Just a nice ordinary life. Full of 9 to 5, little
league, board meetings, Golf. You know, all those
boring things everybody takes for granted. it's kind
of funny if you think about it. Somebody like me
dreaming about such ordinary, trivial things. I guess
what we hold close to our hearts varies from person to
person.
There's so much I wish I could start over.
Right from sqaure one. But we all know about whishes
don't we. They never really come true. I guess all I
can really do is say I'm sorry.
I am.
(Note found in Tendo family dojo next to body of Ranma
Saotome.)
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