Yes, he was preoccupied with worrying about Asuka, too. Shinji's not a cold-hearted bastard like his...well, like how some people think his father is. That's why he barely noticed this new odd thing.

[(a little yellow mouse hops in)
WH: Kya! How cute! (picks it up) What's your name little guy?
Mouse: Pika-CHU!
WH: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (faints and Pikachu leaves)
Ela: You'd think of all the times he saw it over there in forms of keychains, notebooks, and what not, he would have figured it out.]

Kaji stopped abruptly, blinking. He stared at Shinji, then ran the preceding conversation over in his mind, this time allowing the words actually to register. He scratched his head sheepishly, giving Shinji an embarassed grin. "Sorry. I forgot you grew a spine."
Shinji glared.

[WH: (after recovering from Pikachu) Looks like someone hasn't been reading their script.]

The older man coughed uncomfortably, and tried not to look at the boy in the eyes. "Right. Sorry. You'd best get on your wa...huh?"
*stompstompstompSTOMPSTOMPSTOMP*

[Ela: Since when did this become a Godzilla crossover?]

"It's Rei-chan! And--"
"She's carrying an N2! Get down!"
*BOOOOOOM*

[WH: Didn't the same thing happen in Episode 1?]

------------------------------------------------

Momentary chaos: the shaking of Tokyo-3, the falling down of personnel, the scrambling back to stations.
"Report, Hyuuga!"

[Ela: (as Huyyga) The washer's off balance!]

"EVA is damaged but largely intact...audio connection established with the entry plug."
"Thank you, Aoba. Rei! Rei, can you hear me? Are you there?"
"...uhh...."
"Rei!"
"...I've fallen, and I can't get up."
And the bridge shook once again, but this time due to a collective facefault.

[(Both fall over)]

Once she picked herself up from the ground, Maya glanced at her monitor and called out, "The Third Child has swiped his card for entry--he's on his way!"
"Let me pilot!"
All eyes turned to find Shinji standing below the bridge, panting for breath. He was looking slightly pale still, but other signs of his prior illness seemed to have been burned away by the fury in his eyes.

[WH: (as TV announcer) With Ikariall, you can rage away your sickness in a matter of minutes!]

"What are you doing here, Shinji?"
"SHUTUP! Shutupshutupshutup! I don't feel like getting into a stupid philosophical discussion right now, Father, just get me into Unit 01! There's an ass I need to kick! REI GOT HURT!" And with that, Shinji tore
off toward the cages at great speed, leaving the bridge crew to gape.

[(WH, Ela, and the rest of Warhammer's Paranoid fleet applaud Shinji.)
WH: YA!! WOHOOO!! SHINJI-SAMA! SAIKYO! KAKOI!
Ela: (still applauding) We get the idea.]

A figure staggered in through the corridor from which Shinji had entered. "Yes, he _has_ grown a spine, hasn't he?" wheezed a tired-looking Kaji. "But damn...how the hell did he get so fast?"

[WH: He used a cut-scene!]

The eyes watching Shinji now swiveled to stare at Kaji.
"...what? Stop looking at me like that. Yeah, so I've been 'fired', but you expect me to stay outside, away from the Geofront, and get trod on and then blown up? I mean, if _that_ can happen to some watermelons, what about my head?"

[Ela: I refuse to answer that.]

------------------------------------------------

Two EVAs down, one not functional, the other one just out of the cage to intercept the Angel. Things did not look good. They looked downright ugly.

[WH: (holds up a mirror and smiles) I know. (the mirror shatters) *sigh* Of course.]

In fact, Gendou presently found himself looking face to face at Zeruel. It had broken through all the protective layers of the Geofront and smashed its way into Central Dogma. With great violence, deafening noise, and fearsome power, the Angel of Might had come. And now, in scene of stark silence and a tension level that might be imaginable but not really describable, the Commander of NERV was engaging in a staredown with one of the most powerful adversaries in all of NERV's history. He couldn't falter now; after getting bawled out by his son--Shinji, of all people! --he really needed to save face.

[Ela: Well, he had to because, as it is, you'd just laugh at it.]

Bits of debris fell down around the bridge. Neither budged.

The alert sirens cut in and out abruptly as power systems were frantically being repaired by the utilities. Neither budged.
"Comma-" began Maya, but was shushed by Ritsuko. Neither budged.

Balthasar started singing (well, trying to sing) a bawdy drinking song after taking in data from a corrupted disk. Neither budged, although Misato and Kaji instinctively joined in for a few bars before correcting
themselves and looking around in puzzlement.

[(Both roll on the floor laughing)]

Were this a Western, a tumbleweed would have, well, tumbled past, at this time. Just to make a point.

[WH: (adds the creepy whistle)]

Zeruel began to make a sort of growling noise, and its arms started to ripple slightly. Some of the bridge bunnies started to whimper, but Gendou didn't flinch, not even slightly.

[Ela: You know... I think Gendou has a chance to win, despite the fact that Zeruel's 'eyes' aren't really eyes... I think.]

Instead, the Commander tilted his head slightly, such that his glasses caught the light in a classic anime Lenses Flash. Zeruel cringed, almost imperceptibly, but it was there. Even if the tape on the glasses somewhat ruined the effect.

[(Both fall over)]

Then, quite a number of things happened at the same time, more or less.
Zeruel snapped one of its arms straight at the Commander, faster than a human could adequately react. Right behind him was the rest of the bridge.
Maya screamed and glomped onto Ritsuko, which should please certain fanboys. Ritsuko merely turned very pale; the other folks on the bridge started shouting, dove for the floor, or in Makoto's case, started whining quietly for Mommy.

[WH: (pushes a stopwatch button) All within .9876 seconds!]

Unit 01 crashed into the scene, smacking aside the extending toilet- paper arm before it could reach the rest of the bridge crew, and bodyslammed the Angel backward, away from the bridge into the more open
area of the Geofront.

[(More of WH's Paranoids, watching the fight, cheer for Shinji.)]

And Gendou, who could have died a stoic death while watching the Angel dispassionately, had his ass saved by the fact that the tape had finally given out, and he was scrabbling for his glasses on the ground while the razor-sharp arm merely parted his hair nicely as it whizzed right past him.
Somewhere, in the land of Gendou-haters, there was much weeping and the gnashing of teeth. But that is somebody else's problem.

[WH: I've seen that phrase in the Book of Mormon a lot, but where in the Old or New Testaments is that one?] Note: This is an actual question.

"Shinji! Be careful!" yelled Misato. Not that it was really necessary, though; Shinji was doing quite a good job. Driven by lovestruck adolescent wrath, the giant purple robot was bringing the ruckus on Zeruel.

[(WH's Paranoids continue to cheer.)]

After flinging the Angel away from the bridge, EVA-01 immediately sprang forward, launching itself into a flying tackle at its midsection. Both crashed to the ground, the Unit on top.
"He's angry," whispered Maya, staring at the battle in frightened fascination.

[WH: Ya think so?]

"I would imagine so. Could you let go of me, Maya? It's just a little bit uncomfortable when you squeeze me there," said Ritsuko.
Maya blushed, and relinquished her deathgrip on the Doctor's bicep.

[Ela: (as Ritsuko) Ahh, now I can't use this arm for a while, but who cares?]

Shinji started to beat on the Angel with both fists, but was thrown away by an unexpected energy blast. Zeruel immediately rose to an upright position, and shot its arm toward the EVA--but Shinji had landed his mecha on its feet with an impressive backflip, and was prepared.

[WH: See? He was prepared.]

The robot's right hand stretched forward, fingers slightly curled, to intercept the arm; the EVA caught the thin streamer, wound it around the wrist a couple times with fast twist of the forearm, and yanked hard. That sent the Angel hurtling forward, straight into the left fist of Unit 01.
"Good fight," mumbled Fuyutsuki.
"Stop hogging the popcorn," said Gendou.

[Ela: Programs! Get yer programs here!]

This was followed up with a knee to the crotch, or what passed for a crotch between those stubby leg-buds on Zeruel; every male watching crossed his legs upon viewing that. Zeruel shuddered at the impact; though
it didn't have jewels to speak of , that hit did do visible damage-- the kneeblade cut deeply into the Angel. Unit 01 now beat its fist on the core on Zeruel's chest a few times, before palming Zeruel's beak and attempting to give the word 'defacing' a more literal meaning with a mighty pull.

[WH: (as Zeruel) Owie, owie, owie!]

It seemed like such a pity, then, that the backup power gave out at this moment. EVA-01 slumped backwards; Zeruel's face snapped back into place like a rubber band, no doubt to the Angel's vast relief. After taking a second to steady itself, Zeruel retaliated against the helpless robot, first flinging it onto its back, repeatedly targeting Unit 01's torso with its free arm.

[WH: (as Zeruel again, with a wimpy voice) Take that you meanie!]

"What the hell happened?" shouted Misato at the bridge bunnies.
Aoba cursed, and then yelled back, "The power cord must have gotten cut when the Angel blasted the EVA earlier!"
"And no one noticed?"
"Well, did you?"
Misato muttered something, and flipped a switch. "Shinji! Can you hear--" she drew back, grimacing at the flood of swear words that poured out of the commlink. "Geez." She paused. "We're screwed, aren't we?"

[Ela: Yep. Found out, Anno's been using illegal substances before writing EoE.]

A fatalistic silence spread over the entire bridge, as they continued to watch the 14th Angel return the favor on Unit 01, while listening to Shinji scream for his robot to move as well as cast aspersions on the
Angel's mother, whoever that might be.

[(A ten winged, female angel appears.)
Ela: (WH's) Original character theater presents: Kenal Awin, Mother of Angels.
Kenal: Zeruel! My baby!
WH: (snickers, but stops when Kenal casually whaps him over the head and leaves.) Some angels, I swear.]

Suddenly, Ritsuko sat up in her chair and blinked. She reached forward, flicked a switch on her own station, and yelled into the microphone-now hooked up to the loudspeaker system in the area.
"Hey! Yu--uhh, Unit 01! Zeruel said that your thighs look FAT!"

[WH: (as Unit-01) How? I've been working with the EVAs of Steel videos! So how come?]

The technicians boggled at Ritsuko, and even Zeruel faltered for a moment, seemingly confused.
"Yeah! And that your breasts are small, and your hips are nonexistent!"

[Ela: I think it would be a good time for Ritsuko to stop.]

Gendou and Fuyutsuki twitched slightly.
"Come on! Am I going to have to bring up your--"
Ritsuko was then compltely drowned out by a furious roar as EVA-01 suddenly sprang to life. Zeruel never stood a chance; it was bitchslapped into submission by a hand the size of a cargo truck, before getting
smacked down into the ground once more.

[WH: (as Zeruel again) WAA!! MOMMY!!]

"Sempai! We've lost contact with Shin...ji...the synch rate is above 100 percent--and it's still rising!"

[Ela: Is his Mojo rising?]

"It's just taken a tarp and tied it around its neck," reported Makoto.
"And now it's...oh, yuk."
"Mmmrglf," replied Maya, through the hand clapped over her mouth.
Misato simply stared for a few seconds, then weakly commented, "Well, I suppose Shinji was feeling a little peckish after having an empty stomach since last night."
Fuyutsuki quietly discarded the half-full popcorn tub, and would forever have second thoughts about raw fish.
Unit 01 paused to cover a burp in a rather genteel manner, wiped its fingers on the makeshift bib, then took another helping of Angel tartare, rumbling contentedly as it enjoyed a quiet repast.

[WH: (as cooking show host) Now make sure and bake your angel at 7500 degrees for half an hour, pull out of the oven, let cool, add a garnish, and you've got a wonderful meal!]

And off to the side, while everyone else was distracted....
"Doctor Akagi."
"Yes, Commander?"
"...cancel the dinner reservations for tonight."
"Right."
"And get me the number for the Eating Disorders Hotline. I suddenly feel like never eating again in my life...."
"Get in line, Commander."

[WH: (as TV announcer) It's now time for the Brutal Gourmet!]

***
To be continued....
***

Ever wonder how Zeruel managed to get to Tokyo-3 completely undetected until it actually struck? I sure did.

[Ela: I think it asked nicely.]

Yes, I realize this follows much of episode 20 in general events. I promise, the later Angel encounters will be more original. But I had to get Unit 01 its active S2 core. n.n;
Next part will deal with the result of 400% synchronization. That'll be fun, won't it?

[WH: (suddenly depressed) As if the most recent eps of EVA I saw weren't fun enough.]

Finally, as pointed out to me by someone I can't now recall (sorry!), the spelling for that one of the MAGI is "Balthasar". Whoops, silly me....

[Ela: Before you know it, a guy from the east is gonna be after you.]

Andrew Huang...Nerdboy@KawaiiMUCK; ICQ UIN: 30809640
http://www.hcs.harvard.edu/~alhuang/
Harvard Anime Society, President Emeritus
Ah. Now I know. Okay.

[WH: Why do those words sound familiar? Anyway, Tons of fun Huang-sensei. Now, what was I about to do... AH! I remember! I was going to conquer the world!
Ela: Even after Evanjellydonught?
WH: Well... I'll put it off for a while. But anyway, I got to get Sailors Mercury and Mars the rest of their scripts for Shara's Last Gift.
Ela: Oh yeah, your 'baddie' senshi. You know, I sometimes wonder what goes on in your head.
WH: It's not a pretty sight]


'Man who walks in front of car, gets tired. Man who stands behind car, get exhausted.'

-Warhammer (ICQ#: 72406436)

http://www.geocities.com/teknos.geo/

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