Randomness below. Snippage throughout.
[...]
Onna-Tenchi Muyou!
10YEN-RANMA: That means Girl-Tenchi, for those of you who don't
know Japanese. It shouldn't come as a surprise to those of
you who read Dave's stuff. He's fixated on girls...
RANMA-SAMA: And what's wrong with being fixated on girls?
10YEN-RANMA: Geez, you know what I mean. [eyes lookalike warily]
Say, which part of Accidental Goddess are you from?
RANMA-SAMA: Part four. And what's that supposed to mean?
10YEN-RANMA: You sound like you're a little further along your
journey of "self-exploration" as a woman. [smirk]
RANMA-SAMA: Wh- What?!? YOU'RE the one
doing the "self-exploration", Miss Ten Yen!
10YEN-RANMA: HEY! *I* wasn't the one doing the exploring!!!
A Tenchi Muyou! Ryou-ou-ki FanFiction
By
D.F. Roeder
LIME WARNING. There is an almost-reference to a sexual act in this
work. ~_^
10YEN-RANMA: "Almost-reference to a sexual act?"
I'm getting a bad sense of deja-vu, here... [twitch]
RANMA-SAMA: I think that's because this is a repost.
10YEN-RANMA: Uh, yeah, that's it! [blush]
----- Acknowledgments -----
Thanks go to T.H. Tiger, Andrew Norris, and Vince Seifert for
prereading and discussion. My further thanks to Vince Seifert for
his comments and suggestions all along the way and for being an
all-around, Swiss Army fanfic knife. ^_^
Thanks to Bert Miller for sticking to his Washuu guns. :)
RANMA-10YEN: And after this C&C, we're
sure to be on the list! Nya HA Ha ha!
RANMA-SAMA: This is C&C?
----- Disclaimers -----
Tenchi Muyou! Ryo-Ohki and its characters are the property of
Kajishima Masaki and AIC/Pioneer LDC. This work of fanfiction is for
free entertainment purposes only - no compensation has been or will
be received.
sp: Ryou-ou-ki
10YEN-RANMA: Be consistent in your use of extra Us.
RANMA-SAMA: What, there's more than one Dave? [freaks out]
10YEN-RANMA: ...
====================
Chapter 1 - Nyanniichuan Muyou! (No Need for Spring of Drowned
Girl!)
====================
10YEN-RANMA: Run away! Flee now, Tenchi, or
you'll join us in the ranks of the damned.
RANMA-SAMA: Actually, I'm blessed. [grins]
10YEN-RANMA: You keep telling yourself that,
little Miss Fertility Goddess.
RANMA-SAMA: I'll "fertilize" you, if you don't shut up...
10YEN-RANMA: [shuts up]
[...]
Hakubi Washuu, the self-proclaimed Number One Genius Scientist of
the Universe, glanced at the file heading and winced. "All-Purpose
Cultural Day Planner, Universal Edition... Bleah."
10YEN-RANMA: Does Washuu ever use her last name--
RANMA-SAMA: [interrupts] Family name.
10YEN-RANMA: Whatever. [rolls eyes] Use "Hakubi" in the OAVs?
Whenever I see this name, I get a little confused.
RANMA-SAMA: [mutters] Yeah, like THAT'S hard. [smirk]
10YEN-RANMA: For some reason, I keep thinking Ranma crossover...
[10YEN-RANMA's IMAGINATION, filled with bright
colors but low definition. Think crayon drawings.]
WASHUU: Hi, I'm Hibiki Washuu, and this is my daughter, Ryoko!
RYOGA: My name is RyoGA. I'm your SON!
WASHUU: Whoops. Easily fixed. [makes scissor motions with fingers]
RYOGA: "Fixed?" [squeaks in fear]
[Fade to blackness, just after the mechanical
arms seize Ryoga. 10YEN-RANMA has fallen asleep]
RANMA-SAMA: What I think he's trying to
suggest is dropping the "Hakubi".
[...]
In one of innumerable simulated alien environments, Washuu sat
perched on the limb of something resembling a tree, watching little
creatures scurry around.
10YEN-RANMA: Monkey! Monkey-girl!
[Zap]
RANMA-SAMA: [looking at 10YEN-RANMA] What happened to you?
10YEN-RANMA: Ribbit
10YEN-RANMA: I guess you don't want to annoy OAV Washu, either...
suggest: one of an innumerable
or: one of her innumerable
[...]
Hanging upside down from little suction cups on her toes, she
watched the Masu inside their new tank. The ovoid creatures
desultorily floated around, unconsciously mimicking the higher brain
of the observer.
suggest: floated around desultorily
maybe: languidly
(Did you mean to emphasize Washuu's random,
jerky behavior, or her boredom?)
RANMA-SAMA: I'd suggest a smaller word, actually...
10YEN-RANMA: Ribbit.
RANMA-SAMA: [thinks] No, that doesn't work, either.
[...]
Washuu swam with a herd of dolphins, but even that didn't seem to
lift her mood.
10YEN-RANMA: [restored by her alternate "sister"]
Is a group of dolphins called a herd? Just checking.
RANMA-SAMA: And now, thanks to the Advent of the Goddess--
10YEN-RANMA: [blinks in confusion]
RANMA-SAMA: Me, stupid. You can now see a scene
originally cut from this story! [evil grin]
[WASHUU timidly approaches TENCHI's door]
WASHUU: Tenchi?
TENCHI: Yes, Lil' Wahhhh. [mouth hangs open]
WASHUU: [*not* little] Oh, you can just can me Washuu.
TENCHI: [gulps and nods]
WASHUU: I'm wondering if you can... [presses against TENCHI]
Help me with something. [traces circles on his chest.]
TENCHI: O- Okay.... [sweating]
WASHUU: I've lost my spare change, and I'm hoping that you--
[10YEN-RANMA rips scene appart]
10YEN-RANMA: Right! No more of that!!!
[...]
"ARGH!!!" She threw her arms into the air, quickly slid off the
cushion, making it bounce in midair, and walked towards the door.
"When all else fails, find some people! Interact! ... Brother, I'm
really desperate..."
10YEN-RANMA: [in bubble-headed Galaxy Police officer voice]
Miss Washuu?
RANMA-RANMA: [in Universe's Greatest Mad Scientist voice] No.
[...]
"Ahhh. Just as I thought," Tenchi whispered. The house was empty. He
indulged himself in the pleasurable remembrance of how the Masaki
residence had come by its calm.
[Appearances-Tenchi scenes deleted, to protect our more
sensitive viewers, who know that TENCHI would never do a
thing like that. At least not with a chainsaw, since he
has a perfectly good set of Wings of the Light Hawk.]
Early that morning, Aeka and Ryouko had made some kind of screwy bet
with Mihoshi and Sasami (he hadn't actually been present for it),
and the Pirate/Princess duo had promptly lost. The worst part was
that the losers had forgotten to set the terms of the bet *before*
they'd lost.
OSCIR: This all sounds vaguely familiar...
[...] The younger
Juraian princess knew she'd never have a chance like this again --
well, anytime soon, anyway -- and had every intention of
capitalizing on it. Nice, sweet, and generous she may be, but to get
the whole picture of the person, one had to include mild
deviousness,
SASAMI: I'm working on a naughty split
personality, but I can't get it right. [pout]
MISAO: I'm sure you'll figure it out, Sasami. [secretive smile]
a sometimes opportunistic sense of humor, and -- more
importantly at the moment -- a willingness to make a certain pair
pay up.
RANMA-SAMA: "she might have been" You shouldn't use the
present tense, right? [thinks] Although it does sound
like she's not nice anymore...
MISAO: [happy] You did it, Sasami!
Suggest putting this into a separate paragraph with an example.
"Nice, sweet and generous as she may have been, this was the
same girl who... She had an opportunistic..."
Sasami and Mihoshi emerged from the kitchen with glowing smiles, and
Aeka and Ryouko started sweating many, very large drops. They
huddled uncharacteristically close together for comfort, temporarily
forgetting their rivalry.
RYOUKO: Ojou-sama!
AEKA: OHO HO HO HO!!!
10YEN-RANMA: You you PLEASE stop messing
with people's sexual orientation?!?
RANMA-SAMA: Hey, it's my job.
10YEN-RANMA: Just don't even think of using that mojo on me or
I'll... (um) [licks lips] H- Hey! stopit!
RANMA-SAMA: [blushes] Sorry. I still have
problems turning it off.
10YEN-RANMA: No such problems turning me on... [sweat]
"Aeka-oneesama. Ryouko-oneechan," Sasami pontificated. "Mihoshi and
I, as winners, have decided on what we want."
MIHOSHI: Tenchi.
SASAMI: Yes. We'll share him, and you can have each other.
[...]
"--then," Sasami continued without acknowledging her sister, "you
will take us to Okayama Fun World for the afternoon."
o/~ Okayama Fun World... Okayama Fun World...
Where amusement never stops and only 10k yen a pop! o/~
Aeka and Ryouko sagged, while Mihoshi jumped up and down in delight.
<All those screaming kids,> Ryouko thought. <All that money,> Aeka
added.
RANMA-SAMA: Would Ayeka really think of the money? I'm
sure it's never been a problem for her in the past.
"THEN, you two will take us to Chez Paul for dinner--"
"FRENCH?!?!" Aeka screamed. Ryouko wasn't listening; she was still
entertaining visions of a miniature horde on a sugar high.
WASHUU: In order to help Mihoshi enjoy the amusement park
[thinks] (so she'll stay there and out of my hair as
long as possible) [speaks] I've used my age-reduction
ray to turn her back into a child. She's a little
hyper, so be careful.
MIHOSHI: Wai! Wai! Wai! Wai! Wai! Wai! Wai! Wai!
[runs in circles, arms held out like plan wings]
I wanna fly! Fly, Ryo-chan! [grabs Ryoko's ear-tails]
RYOKO: help.
"And FINALLY, to the movie of our choice, with lots and lots of
sodas, popcorn, candy, and whatever else we want." Sasami's posture
brooked no dispute. Unfortunately, dispute was at the center of
everything Aeka.
pl: soda
(Would you say "lots of waters"?)
AYEKA: That's a lie! I don't dispute
things just for the sake of dispute!
"No! Uh-uh! That's too much, Sasami! No bet worth's that much--"
"The OTHER option," Sasami interrupted, with a hard glint in her
eye, "is for you and Ryouko to do our chores, in addition to your
own, for one month. Also, you will cook all meals and taste-test
each others cooking before serving."
AYEKA: That's not fair! She doesn't HAVE a sense of taste!
RYOKO: Hah! [grins]
AYEKA: I mean, LOOK at that dress. It's SO last millennium!
[...]
Tenchi snickered as the memory ended with Aeka whispering to Ryouko,
"How much money do you have?" and Ryouko amazingly pulling out empty
pockets where there had previously been no pockets.
RYOKO: No problem. There's a bank on the way.
AYEKA: You have an account?
RYOKO: Huh? What's an "account"?
AYEKA: ...
[...]
"Ranma 1/2: my favorite! Saffron and Phoenix Mountain, here I come."
Tenchi became instantly lost in a world of super-powered martial
artists and the villains that plague them.
TENCHI: I'm sorry, but I can't buy this at all.
ME read Ranma 1/2? Puh-LEASE!
10YEN-RANMA: [indignant] Hey!
TENCHI: I mean, why would I read it? A guy plagued with
multiple female admirers? Powerful fighting techniques
and enemies? Heck, I got all that!
10YEN-RANMA: [thinking] Ah yes, but soon you too will
know the horror of MALE admirers.
TENCHI: I guess I'd find it funny if Ranma had it worse than
me, but he doesn't! Female admirers? Take your pick!
Villains? I've got Kagato. Fighting techniques? I've
got kendo and the Light Hawk Wings.
10YEN-RANMA: Kendo? Is that a joke? That's not a real
martial art!
TENCHI: I could kick YOUR butt!
RANMA-SAMA: [smiling] It's so cute how you two fight.
[tilts head in thought] You know, you'd make a cute couple.
10YEN-RANMA and TENCHI: ...
[...]
Washuu walked out of the 'utility closet' and looked around. She
strode into the dining room. No one. She peeked into the kitchen,
expecting to at least see Sasami.
gram: expecting to see at least Sasami
(Don't split infinitives.)
10YEN-RANMA: Yeah, leave those splitting point techniques to Ryoga.
"Moshi, moshi?" Empty. "Damn, where is everyone? I've got to get out
of the lab more often. Should've checked my monitors, too."
Suggest putting the first sentence in the last paragraph,
since empty refers to the kitchen, which is only mentioned
in the previous paragraph.
[...]
"Might as well take a catnap."
10YEN-RANMA: [twitch]
Quiet as a mouse and lost in thought,
RANMA-SAMA: Cat? Mouse? Is this what they mean by mixed metaphor?
she climbed the two flights of stairs to where carrot pillows invite
weary scientists to snooze. Washuu immediately brightened when she
saw Tenchi laid out and reading with his back to her. She softly
padded up behind him.
10YEN-RANMA: Man, his danger sense is WEAK.
GENMA: No doubt his fool sensei never threw him
out the window first thing in the morning.
KASTSUHIKO: [crying] It's true! I've failed my grandson!
"TENCHI-DONO!!"
"YAAAAHHH!!!" The manga went flying, and Tenchi rolled off the
carrot pillow, clutching his heart with his right hand.
RANMA-SAMA: [becomming interested] And his left hand?
10YEN-RANMA: [inches away from RANMA-SAMA]
*HUFF HUFF PUFF* "WAAAshuu-chan! Don't DO that!!" *HUFF PUFF*
Washuu was rolling on the floor, howling in laughter. Disgruntled,
Tenchi retrieved his manga and sat back down on the pillow. Washuu's
laughter slowly wound down, and she climbed up onto the next pillow
over.
RANMA-SAMA: [grinning] "That's not a pillow!"
10YEN-RANMA: He's not a girl yet, idiot.
TENCHI: "Yet?" What does that mean?
10YEN-RANMA: Uh, nothing. Nothing.
"Heh, do you, heh heh, mind if I join you? Heh."
MECHA-MINISTER: I now pronounce you man and wife.
You may now kiss the World's Greatest Scientist.
WASHUU: [blushing] I'm so happy...
TENCHI: [frantic] I didn't mean in holy matrimony!
[...]
"Thanks, Tenchi! I needed a good laugh."
"I would say 'anytime', but..."
TENCHI: ...You might take me literally.
"Heh, that's all right. Sorry if I scared you... too much." Washuu
broke into a wide and crooked smirk. "What're ya doin', anyway?"
Tenchi shrugged. "Just reading."
"Let me see." Tenchi handed her the manga, and she studied the
cover. "Ranma 1/2? What a strange title."
suggest: strange title. Is it any good?"
(Otherwise...)
"Actually, it's hilarious."
(...This sounds really weird.)
RANMA-SAMA: What's so funny about the title Ranma Nibunnoichi?
TENCHI: [waving arms] I meant the book! The book is funny.
RANMA-SAMA: Are you saying my life is a
joke to you? Divine Retribution! [ZAP!]
TENCHI: [smolders]
ATARU: I feel a chill down my spine.
CHERRY: Most ominous.
TENCHI: [stars in eyes, bulge in pants] Oh, Ranma-sama...!
RANMA-SAMA: Oops, wrong juice.
ATARU: Now I REALLY feel a chill!
LUM: Ooh, can you show me how to do that?
ATARU: !!!
"Oh? What's it about?"
"It's a really *long* story, but in a nutshell, it's about this
martial artist with a curse. The curse turns him into a girl
whenever he's splashed with cold water. He turns back with warm or
hot water. He's also engaged to the kami know how many women,
GENMA: TWO! It's just two! Why must
everyone think the worst of me?!?
ANIME-GENMA: [sympathetic] I have no idea.
all
arranged by his father (who's also cursed, but he turns into a giant
panda). He, Ranma that is, also has women who aren't engaged to him
chasing him around."
10YEN-RANMA: You forgot the part about how the guys that hate
boy-type Ranma fall in love with my girl-type body.
RANMA-SAMA: Thanks to a certain mercenary, money-grabbing
sister who sells pictures of your hot body.
10YEN-RANMA: Don't remind me.
RANMA-SAMA: Although you liked the "money-grabbing" part.
[wink wink nudge nudge]
10YEN-RANMA: I'm going to have to kill you, now.
"Sound familiar?" Washuu quipped.
suggest: "Sounds familiar."
(This doesn't feel like a question.)
[...]
Washuu studied the girl on the cover again. "So... Ranma can change
his sex with just the application of the right temperature of water?
Interesting..."
Tenchi bigsweated. "Uhhh, what do you mean by that?"
WASHU: Do you really want to hear the answer, Tenchi? :)
Washuu blinked and looked at Tenchi. A devilish smile grew on her
face. "Changing sexes sounds like fun. Does he completely change?
Inside and out?"
10YEN-RANMA: Lie! Lie, you fool!
Tenchi's nervousness went up another notch. "Yeah, I, er, believe
so. Why?" His voice cracked on the last word.
10YEN-RANMA: No! Now she's gonna make sure your girl-type body
is pumped full of horomones, messing with your head. You'll
be a girly pervert, like this Ranma. [points at companion]
RANMA-SAMA: ExCUSE me? WHO'S the pervert. *I* didn't
ask for my problem, Little Miss Vending Machine!
[Scenes of violence omitted]
She abruptly changed the subject. "By the way, Tenchi-dono.
WASHU: On a COMPLETELY unrelated subject...
I could
really *use* you in the lab for a little while. *Nooo* one's home. I
still haven't gotten that sam--"
"AAAH! HAHAHA! Look at the time! HAHA! I promised Ryou-ou-ki some
carrots today, HAHA! So..." Tenchi hopped up onto his feet and was
running in place.
You're using *asterisks* and CAPS for emphasis.
You might want to be more consistent.
10YEN-RANMA: Bah, consistency is for the simple-minded!
RANMA-SAMA: Just the answer I would have expected from you. :j
"Ne, Tenchi! It'll only take a *minute*! I'll put on a different
outfit for you." She winked at him.
10YEN-RANMA: And here come's the nurse's outfit.
RANMA-SAMA: The question is: is it for Washuu... or Tenchi? ^_^
Tenchi waved his hands in front of the scientist.
[goosh]
TENCHI: Aheh...
WASHU: That's the spirit!
"NOOOO, don't put
yourself out-- ERRR, I didn't... Don't take that the wrong way!!
AAAAH! Gotta go! See ya!" Tenchi set a personal best getting to the
carrot fields.
RANMA-SAMA: Tenchi is showing some small
level of self-preservation, I see.
10YEN-RANMA: Would you call that Out Of Characer behavior?
RANMA-SAMA: Nah. More like giving Tenchi a fighting chance.
DAVE: Or at least the illusion of a fighting chance. ^_^
Washuu snickered as she watched Tenchi tear out of the house. "He's
so much fun to tease." She picked up the discarded manga, looking at
RANMA-SAMA: suggest "so much fun to grease" ;)
10YEN-RANMA: ...
the girl on the cover. "A *complete* sex change with every splash.
Sounds like an interesting diversion. Just what I needed to chase
away the blues: a redhead. Can't beat 'em!"
AKANE: It's true. I've tried tables, mallets, shinais,
fists, and feet, but none of them keep a redhead down.
[...]
"Cover page? No. Page 1? No. Page 2? No. Page... The girl with the
wings is really built, but no..." Washuu continued through the text,
until...
KODACHI: OHO HO HO HO! She should scan me.
I am the most beautiful of all.
SHAMPOO: Shampoo is most sexy-type girl!
KODACHI: That's "most sexed", dear. [cruel smile]
SHAMPOO: You calling Shampoo Lady of Night?
KODACHI: No, *I* am a Lady of the Night. You're a slut.
SHAMPOO: Ooh! Shampoo kill!
KODACHI: OHO HO HO HO!
ASUZA: Asuza thinks she's the cutest...
"Yes!" She touched one of the characters on the holographically
displayed manga page, and the figure became highlighted in bright
blue. "Load all instances of this character, extrapolate to three
dimensions, average, and display." The machine complied.
RANMA-SAMA: Obviously, she must have scanned ME.
AKANE: It doesn't say. She could have scanned me.
RANMA-SAMA: You? HA! She's looking for someone who's BUILT.
AKANE: RrranMA!
RANMA: [cowering] Eep.
AYEKA: Wh- What are you doing?!?
AZAKA: Help!
[Pan back to see a handle crudely attached to
AZAKA, whom she is weilding as a mallet.]
[...]
"Better. Hmmm." She tweaked the model's dimensions a little more,
drawing on her own knowledge of human standards of beauty. "There!
Hey, that's not too bad! Those need to be augmented, though." She
tweaked slightly more.
RANMA-SAMA: Glossing over Washu's toe-fetish was probably a good
idea. You don't want to alarm too many of your readers.
[...]
"Hair, hair, hair." One of her crab-leg forelocks waved in front of
her eye. "Red! Is there any other color? Take a little of that
displaced mass, don't send it to the pocket dimension, yes, yes."
10YEN-RANMA: I was so sure it was going to be green.
RANMA-SAMA: You mean this fic isn't supposed to explain
the origin of Kiyone? [scratches head]
[...]
"Default internal structure in place. Now for some adjustments.
Hmmm. Increase that response 45%, that bit, um, 55%, and that 35%.
Increase number of terminal ganglion clusters to accommodate load
increase, yes, yes. Heighten stimulus to those centers when that
happens, increase somatic responses accordingly..." She paused and
snickered. "Somatic responses, indeed! Let's see, um, yes, yes,
yes..."
RANMA-SAMA: These are all Bad Things, by the way.
10YEN-RANMA: Yeah, we're not sure what they are,
but we know they're Bad. We're men! MEN, damnit!
RANMA-SAMA: Well, Tenchi IS kinda a wuss, but even
he doesn't deserve what's about to happen.
[...]
Washuu put the finishing touches on her work and crowed. "YES! This
was so much fun! I feel 837.15% better!" She gazed at the big red
button that would set everything in motion, and her face fell.
The big red button. The candy-like red button.
How could you NOT push it?!?
"Aw, nuts. I can't do that to him. It wouldn't be a very nice thing
to do [...]
WASHU: Katsuhiko, on the other hand...
[In the Shrine]
YOSHO: [byoing] Eep.
She typed in a file name: Onna-Tenchi. She paused and then grinned,
typing 'Muyou!' after it. She cackled aloud at her pun and leaned
back in her chair, jostling a piece of equipment behind her. She
heard a soft 'plop' and whipped her head around, a terrible feeling
gripping her. With a shout of "NO!" she spied Mihoshi's Galaxy
Police uniform hat sitting on the auxiliary control console. It had
apparently fallen from some precarious perch at about eye-level and
landed on the secondary big red button. Washuu's eye twitched, and
the surrounding machinery suddenly sprang to life.
YUKINOJO: Ah, a Mihoshi proxy. Even her uniforms are clumsy.
Although why she's leaving uniforms in Washu's lab...
MIHOSHI: [blushes]
WASHU: No! I won't have this innuendo!
This is how rumors get started! [frantic]
RANMA-SAMA: Don't worry, as the Goddess of Sex, I'll help you
overcome your fears and admit your love to Mihoshi...
[Scene closes on Washu's screams.]
A disembodied voice announced, "Transformation Process Engaged."
RANMA-SAMA: [twitching] It's horrible! Horrible! Changed into
a woman becuase of a computer error! There is no greater
tragedy in the world! [breaks down sobbing]
"AAACK!!" Washuu's fingers flew over her own console, trying to halt
the procedure. A holo-computer panel sprang up, and she read the
following line: "Interruption of process has an 86.7385% chance of
voiding test subject. Do you wish to cancel the process?"
Without even thinking about it, Washuu hit "NO". She put her face in
her hands and waited for the procedure to run its course.
10YEN-RANMA: Right, make it look like it's not her fault.
[bitter] Hell, we can't even blame it on Mihoshi; she
wasn't even there.
WASHU: Why do you need to blame it on anyone?
10YEN-RANMA: Well... It's gotta be someone's fault.
And for once I can't blame my Pop or the old goat.
RYOKO: I blame you, Ranma. It's always your fault.
10YEN-RANMA: Uh, that's a new look for you, Ryoga...
WASHU: Geez, take that headband out of your hair!
RYOKO: [whines] But it's all spiky!
[...]
Tenchi yawned as Ranma got splashed for the umpteenth time. <If he
wasn't so cute and sexy as a girl, this would've probably gotten old
by now. Thank Kamisama for fan service,> he thought.
RANMA-SAMA: He says "You're welcome." Oh, and "watch out."
[...]
As he reached the landing, a sudden, tingling warmth and a wave of
dizziness washed over him, and he grabbed the banister for support.
WASHU: It tingles, to let you know it's working!
TENCHI: This isn't shampoo we're talking about here!
[...]
Aeka reached him first, and Mihoshi was hot on her heels... for a
second. In order to negotiate a turn around a piece of furniture,
Mihoshi had crossed her right foot over her left, but didn't adjust
the path of her left foot when it moved forward. As a result, she
quickly found inertia and gravity propelling her to the horizontal.
Is there any furniture to negotiate between the front door and
the stairs? All I can recall is the depression for the shoes.
Maybe she could trip over that step?
She fanned her arms as she fell, and her giant theater soda went
flying. Everyone at the bottom of the stairs was drenched as they
watched Mihoshi hit the floor.
10YEN-RANMA: You'd think Ryoko would learn to phase out
so these things don't happen.
RANMA-SAMA: Washu's probably installed an auto-wash/dry
feature to Ryoko, anyway, so it doesn't matter if she
gets dirty.
"WAAAAHH!" Mihoshi began to bawl. Feeling suddenly strange again,
Tenchi leaned back against the stairs and closed his eyes as the
female cast sighed and helped the crying Galaxy Policewoman to her
feet. As a group they turned back to Tenchi and halted after one
step.
What, Mihoshi doesn't get to trip into Tenchi's
brand-new frontal cushioning system? ^_^;
[...]
Tenchi scrambled back up the stairway a short distance. "WHAT?!" he
screeched in a very high-pitched voice. "EEP!" His hands flew to the
mouth that strange voice had come from, but before he could
investigate further, he found himself staring at the business end of
Ryouko's sword.
RANMA-SAMA: Straight to the phallic imagery, I see. [nod nod]
10YEN-RANMA: Dave is a perv!
"What've you done with MY Tenchi?!?!" Ryouko demanded. "Fess' up,
ojouchan, before I stroke you with this!"
"Ryouko! I'm... EEP!" There was that voice, again.
RYOKO: Was that a burp? Good lord, she's eaten him
whole! I'll cut open her belly and set him free!
TENCHI: I am not a tauntaun!
"Look here, harridan! Where is Tenchi-sama?!" Aeka was crowding in,
and her logs were following.
RANMA-SAMA: So, energy sword, or hundreds of "log"s?
[arches eyebrow] Is Mihoshi the only one not
bristling with phallic symbols?
MIHOSHI: I don't need phallic symbols. I already
have someone I like... [blushes] Oh, my!
WASHU: [from lab] Help! Mishoshi's got me bound up in
my own mechanical arms. Please! She said she's coming
back with green hair dye!
While the princess and the pirate harangued the confused Tenchi,
Sasami had been looking at the TV, looking at Mihoshi's spilled
soda, looking at Tenchi, and back around and around. Mihoshi wasn't
entirely sure if what was going on was her fault or not.
KEI: Of course it's not your fault!
YURI: Yes, I'm sure the G.P. central computer
will clear you of any wrongdoing.
"Ryouko! Aeka-san! It's me, Tenchi! And what the hell is wrong with
my voice?!?!"
"Look, you. Tenchi's 100% man! You, obviously, are not!" Ryouko
reached down and strongly squeezed a large and well-formed breast.
suggest: and squeezed ... a large, well-formed
("Strongly squeezed" just doesn't read well. And I'm
not sure how much it adds over just plain squeezed.)
["Pulp" joke omitted for taste]
RANMA-SAMA: Why do they always squeeze the
breasts, first? [pout] Please don't do that.
10YEN-RANMA: We've scretly replaced Ryoko with
Nabiki. Let's see if anyone notices...
"ITAAAIII!" Tenchi screamed. "That HURT! I don't know what your
prob... lem... is..." Tenchi stared at Ryouko's hand still resting
on the breast. "Ano... what ARE these?" He reached up and
tentatively squeezed the two objects sitting under his shirt. The
sensation he received was... unexpected. "AH! KAMISAMA!! What ARE
these?!?!"
Ryouko rolled her eyes. "They're TITS, you moron, as if you didn't
know--"
TENCHI: I didn't have them yesterday!
RYOKO: Quick bloomer.
"I know perfectly well what, erm, breasts are, thank you very much,
Ryouko! But why do *I* have them?!"
"Because you're a girl," Aeka said flatly.
"Hey! I'm a GUY, damn it!"
AYEKA: Oh, no. I'm not falling for THAT again! The
person with the wonderful purple hair CLAIMED she was
just cursed to have a girl's body, and knew how to break
the spell, but no matter how many times we had sex--
ALIELLE: This time for sure!
AYEKA: Oh, very well. Just just this one last time.
"ARGH!!!" Energy crackled all over Ryouko's body. "We're getting off
the subject!! WHERE. IS. TENCHI!!!"
Suggest you put a question mark in there somewhere.
"I'M. RIGHT. HERE, RYO--"
"COOOOLLLL!!!" Sasami had finally put all the pieces together,
TENCHI: Oh, good! Did you find my missing thing?
I really miss that thing. [pout]
[...]
The girls turned and stared at Tenchi, who was, at the moment,
feeling all over the strange body under her hands. A look of horror
grew on Tenchi's face.
TENCHI: I'm only a C-cup!
[...]
Tenchi looked at the breasts. <They're HUGE! Well... large, at
least.> Tenchi looked at the waspish waist, the flare of the hips,
the firm and well-shaped legs.
RANMA-SAMA: Time to start adjusting, Tenchi. "Tenchi looked
at *her* breasts... *her* waist... *her* legs."
"Oh, no. I'm... I'm..." Everyone leaned in. "I'm a GIRL!" The women
tipped the rest of the way over and face-faulted. Ryouko was the
first up, and she looked at the redhead in confusion.
"Te-Te-Tenchi?" Ryouko asked in an unsteady voice.
"Hai. It's me."
TENCHI: Mou... I must look a fright.
And my HAIR'S all messed up!
"How... how..."
10YEN-RANMA: Looks like we'll have to explain
the birds and the bees to this one.
RANMA-SAMA: Not to mention the manipulative
godlike beings... [grin]
10YEN-RANMA: I think you're getting into this
Goddess thing too much.
[...]
"Wait a second, Ryouko." Tenchi closed her eyes with a grimace and
slowly, ever so slowly reached her hand down to check...
Tenchi's eyes flew open. "WAAAAH! It's GONE!"
TENCHI: The only thing left is this slit! And this thing, here.
Ooh! Well that doesn't... Oh, my! Um... Maybe I won't miss
it too much. [excuses self] If you need me I'll be in the
bathroom...
Ryouko clapped her hands together twice and bowed, silently saying a
Shinto prayer.
RANMA-SAMA: Aku Ryo Tai San?
10YEN-RANMA: Ryoko?!?
RANMA-SAMA: Yeah, maybe not.
"I, for one, do not believe it!" Aeka voiced in her most regal tone.
"You will have to prove it... 'girl'!" Everyone scratched their
heads, but it was Mihoshi who came up with the answer. She leaned
over and whispered in Tenchi's ear, and Tenchi immediately
brightened.
TENCHI: Remember the time you, me, and Mihoshi had that three-way--?
AYEKA: [blushing madly] Alright! I believe you.
[...]
Tenchi pulled the Tenchiken from... somewhere, and the blade sprang
to life. Aeka wilted; Tenchi had provided the proof she'd wanted.
AYEKA: Didn't it used to be blue-tinged?
RYOKO: Yeah, that's more of a pink...
TENCHI: ...
[...]
At the unassuming door to Washuu's interdimensional laboratory, all
was quiet until the rumbling of many feet rose to a deafening roar,
but before anyone could pound on the innocent door, it opened.
Washuu looked out bleakly, clutching something in her hand.
WASHU: I'm sorry. [hangs head] I couldn't re-attach it.
GIRLS: Noooo!
[Yes, that includes Tenchi. ;) ]
[...]
Mihoshi started bawling, and Washuu immediately felt contrite.
"S-Sorry, Mihoshi-dono."
Washu calls Mihoshi -dono?
Tenchi jumped as Mihoshi gathered her up in a hug, easily picking
her up off the floor and mashing her face into a generous breast,
and started bawling at the top of Tenchi's head. "I'm so SORRY,
Tenchi! I can't do anything right! WAAAH!!"
Tenchi fanned her arms frantically, but the movement began to slow
as her body began to quiver.
"Uh... Mihoshi," Ryouko offered, "I think you need to, ah, let her
go."
suggest: let him go
(How quickly she forgets his gender...)
The Galaxy Policewoman instantly stopped bawling and peered at
Ryouko. "Whaaat?"
suggest: What?
(I don't really know why you've drawn it out.)
Ryouko pointed down to the limp Tenchi in Mihoshi's arms.
RANMA-SAMA: She's not limp! She's firm and well-bodied. :D
10YEN-RANMA: [stares in horror at mirror self] Wh- What?
RANMA-SAMA: I'm the Goddess of Sex.
I have to think of these things.
10YEN-RANMA: [thinking] Great, he's
finally gone off the deep end.
"EEK!" Mihoshi dropped Tenchi to her feet, and the brand-new girl
actually managed to stay upright, if a bit wobbly.
RANMA-SAMA: Give her some time to break in, and she'll be as
malleable as Mihoshi could want. ^o^
10YEN-RANMA: [covering ears] Shutup shutup shutup!
Mihoshi bent down to look her in the face. "I'm so sorry, Tenchi!"
"Noooo worries," Tenchi said slowly, slack jawed and eyes glazed
over. "I'm just peeeachy."
RANMA-SAMA: [raises eyebrows] And now the peach metaphor--
10YEN-RANMA: [left the room]
Mihoshi straightened and smiled, resisting the urge to squeeze the
redhead in another hug. "Thanks, Tenchi! I feel LOTS better now!"
RANMA-SAMA: Try before you buy.
Everyone face-faulted.
"So would I if I'd had that," Ryouko muttered from the floor.
punc: would I, if
suggest: if I'd done that,"
or: Ryouko muttered from the floor, glancing up at Tenchi.
Snapped out of her daze, Tenchi crawled to her feet and addressed
Washuu. "Can you fix this? Oh, of course you can, hahaha! You're the
Greatest Scientific Genius in the galaxy--"
10YEN-RANMA: Witness this fine application
of the Crouch of the White Tiger!
RANMA-SAMA: Quite impressive, from this
novice to the Anything Goes School!
"Universe," Washuu corrected with a glare.
YUME: [clears throat]
"Uh... yeah, heh, the universe." Tenchi scratched the back of her
head, making her breasts bounce... a lot. "Ow. That's
uncomfortable." Tenchi grabbed her jiggling breasts with splayed
fingers to stop them from moving. Aeka and Ryouko boggled, but
Tenchi didn't notice.
ATARU: Quite a handful for such a nice young lady.
Here, Miss, let me help you hold those...
"Um, about fixing this?" She hefted her mounds, and Ryouko fell over
while Aeka blushed and averted her gaze. Tenchi noticed this time
and, abashed, she let go of herself.
More jiggling. Repeat.
"Ryouko will loan you a bra, Tenchi-sama," Aeka said, still looking
away.
"I don't wear bras, Aeka," Ryouko smirked. "I'm naturally pert."
WASHU: [raises eyebrow]
RYOKO: Shut up!
[...]
"YOU CAN FIX IT, RIGHT?!" Tenchi screeched. Her nerves were
jangling, and she felt a little out of control.
SASAMI: But you've already been "fixed," big sister Tenchi!
TENCHI: ...
"Of course I can!" Washuu huffed, then deflated. "But it'll take me
a while. I didn't, er, rather, the simulation was run on the idea
that it be permanent, so I didn't leave myself a lot of outs, errr,
but hey! No problem! Just have to wait until I can figure out how?
Right? Right?"
Hmm. This part is kinda weak. There was no mention of the
permanancy during the simulation. Besides, Washu's got
zillions of scans of Tenchi.
What you need to do if find some way to kill her records
and/or short out her equipment. Maybe a cabbit's been
chewing the wires...?
[...]
Ryouko stepped forward and turned Washuu around, pushing her back
into her lab. "Well, get after it!"
suggest: get to it!
(I think that's what you mean.)
"Hey!" Washuu objected. "I'm hungry!"
RANMA-SAMA: Do you want breast or thigh meat?
10YEN-RANMA: Why won't you shut up?!?
[...]
Tenchi slumped over and trudged back to the living room. She fell
onto the couch, bemoaning her fate. "I'm not a man. I'm not a man.
I'm--"
KUNO: She is no man!
TENCHI: Gee, thanks.
KUNO: [pulls out victory fan] Therefore, I would DATE with you!
[...]
Tenchi sprang off the couch and gathered the blue-haired princess up
in her arms. "Arigatou, Sasami-chan. You SAVED me!" Tenchi gave her
a big smooch on the cheek, and then stopped.
"What did I do that for? I don't kiss people like that." She shakily
set Sasami back down.
TENCHI: I only kiss Ryo-Ohki like that!
RYO-OHKI: [blushes] Miya.
[...]
Sasami looked at Tenchi strangely, and then her eyes grew wide.
"Maybe it's the curse," she said solemnly. Everyone pondered this,
except Ryouko. She gave Tenchi an appraising look that had the new
redhead squirming.
SASAMI: Let's check. [walks behind Tenchi and pulls small tab
out from the back of her neck. She reads it.] Machine wash
cold. To preserve female horomones, do not place in dryer.
Do not fold.
TENCHI: I have a label? [little sweat]
SASAMI: Sure, Washu puts care-for instructions on all her things.
RYOKO: [to Ayeka, trying to sneak up behind her]
Don't even think about it!
[...]
"Well, that was different," Tenchi observed. "It's really weird when
you're paying attention." He pulled his now-black tresses around.
"And I kept the long hair. Weird."
suggest: pulled a long length of his black hair
(Has "tresses" ever been used to describe something masculine? ^_^)
Ryouko floated over. "Is it still gone?" She began to rub her hands
up and down his torso, gradually moving lower.
suggest: to slide her hands down his torso.
RANMA-SAMA: Rubbing her hands up and hand his torso just looks
weird. It looks likes she's trying to get rid of hypo-
thermia. Now, what she should have been rubbing was his
coc--
10YEN-RANMA: [weilding Shampoo's sword] You understand why I
have to kill you, right? The original you would have wanted
it this way, not turned into a horny girl.
RANMA-SAMA: [offended] Sex Goddess. [zap] As I'm
sure you're beginning to remember. [smile]
10YEN-RANMA: Crap. [pants, adjusts collar]
[...]
Ryouko and Aeka breathed in relief. Sasami and Mihoshi just looked.
"What? Is what back?" Mihoshi asked.
MIHOSHI: Let me see. [reaches for Tenchi's pants]
"ERRR, ME! Yeah, that's it! I'm back!" Tenchi laughed a little too
loudly. Sasami blushed as she finally figured out what they were
talking about.
"C'mon, Mihoshi-oneechan. I'll fix you a midnight snack," Sasami
offered.
"Yay! I was getting hungry, again."
MIHOSHI: [looks longingly at Tenchi's pants]
But I was already going to get something to eat...
[...]
Tenchi sighed. "What am I gonna DO? I've got school tomorrow!"
"Stay dry?" Aeka offered with a faint smile.
"In SWIM class?!"
AYEKA: I have a full-body latex suit you could use.
TENCHI: ...
AYEKA: That I, uh... Borrowed from a friend. [blush]
TENCHI: ...
AYEKA: The whip is mine, though.
[...]
"Aeka! How DARE you insinuate that I'd take advantage of Ten--"
"Take ADVANTAGE?! Then what do you call sneaking into her room at
all hours of the day and night?! Tender Loving Care?!"
This quote makes little sense in this context.
"Girls--"
"Ooo! Listen, Prissy Princess. I'm just letting Tenchi know that if
he needs anything--"
"I'm sure you'd GLADLY oblige, especially if it means relieving her
of her virtue!"
10YEN-RANMA: Sorry, man. You're already emasculated in
Ayeka's mind. She thinks of you as a girl now.
RANMA-SAMA: Of course, since she prefers girls...
AYEKA: I told you, the girl said she was a man!
ALIELLE: [whine] But Big Sister... [rub rub grope]
[...]
Sasami walked out of the kitchen carrying a tray. "I've got tea!"
ONNA-TENCHI: I've got 'A'..
Aeka went purple, and her power logs faded in around Ryouko and
Tenchi. One of the logs bumped the tray Sasami was carrying, and the
teakettle hit the rim of the tray and sloshed its contents all over
Tenchi. Everyone stopped to look.
Don't the logs simply hover in place? Suggest that
Sasami just didn't notice and bumped into a log.
"At least it was *warm* water," Tenchi quipped. Ryouko rubbed her
hand across his damp chest.
"I'll help dry you off, Tenchi," Ryouko said seductively. Aeka was
about to let loose again when Mihoshi came jogging out of the
kitchen.
AYEKA: Those aren't SPONGES you're rubbing against him, Ryoko!
"Thanks so much, Sasami, for replacing my soda-- URK!" Mihoshi
planted her face into one of Aeka's logs, and her arms stuck
straight out in front of her. Her new soda went flying... onto
Tenchi. Ryouko was now rubbing two large breasts instead of a
masculine chest.
RYOKO: Cn't... Brth! Bt... vr... cmfrtbl....
Tenchi's head slowly lolled back, and she started giving off little
grunts and groans of pleasure. Ryouko was still trying to take in
what had happened and why Tenchi was making such weird noises,
forgetting that she was still rubbing.
"ACK!! Ryouko-san! WHAT are you DOING, you HENTAI?!?!" Aeka
screeched.
AYEKA: You said I was the only one for you!
[runs out of room, crying]
[...]
Tenchi forced her head up and gave Ryouko a disappointed look.
"Oh... huh?" Tenchi examined her body. "YAAAH! I'm a girl, again!
How did THAT happen?" <And I suddenly WANTED to be fondled!> "ARGH!"
"As to how it happened... guess," Aeka deadpanned.
Tenchi closed her eyes and nodded. "Mihoshi-san."
TENCHI: [hugs Mihoshi] Thank you! I don't
ever want to be an awful boy again!
MIHOSHI: Oh, my!
[...]
Hovering in the air a few feet away, Ryouko found herself having a
fast change of heart, sorry she'd sprung away like that. <Damn!> she
thought. <Why do I still feel like boinking him, even when he's a
girl? Hmmm, even though he's a she, it's still Tenchi. That's all
that matters.>
10YEN-RANMA: Actually, your circuits are just crossed. :j
Ryouko smiled serenely, knowing she could love him no
matter what. She floated back down into Tenchi's lap.
10YEN-RANMA: [cooing] Good girl! GOOD girl!
RYOKO: Hey! I'm not a dog!
UKYO: [spatulas Gary before he can repond]
"It doesn't matter to me what you look like, Tenchi. I'm still here
for you," Ryouko cooed.
RYOKO: Of course, we still have to find out what you taste like...
Tenchi trembled in desire. She *wanted* to be touched all of a
sudden, oh Kamisama, so much. "Ry-Ry-Ryouko. I-I think you'd
be-better le-let me up."
TENCHI: 'Cause I wanna be on top! [bounce]
[...]
"Aeka? What was *that* all about?" Ryouko asked after a few seconds,
looking at the crown princess like she was a stranger.
Aeka put her hand to her mouth. "I... I'm not sure. I was worried
that she might have, um, felt... violated?"
"WHAT?!?! SHE?!?!?!" Ryouko was beside herself, figuratively
speaking.
An important distinction, when Ryoko is concerned. :j
What is the "SHE" for? It suggests that Ryoko
feels she was the one who was violated.
Aeka put a hand to her forehead. "I find I have a headache. I do not
wish to speak of this any further. Good night!" She climbed the
stairs to her room.
RYOKO: [mewling] Ayeka, don't be that way. [paw paw]
AYEKA: No. You showed more attention to Tenchi than me.
[...]
In her lab, Washuu had been watching the proceedings, occasionally
falling off her cushion in gales of laughter, despite feeling guilty
over what had happened. At the moment, however, she had a
contemplative look on her face.
RANMA-SAMA: Yes, let's watch as his sense of masculinity is
eroded, to be replaced with the unstoppable urges from
the hormones coursing through her nubile body...
10YEN-RANMA: Is is getting hot in here? [adjusts collar]
[...]
"If I read Tenchi right, just now... hmmm. This little accident may
actually start a fire or two burning. At any rate, it could be fun;
Tenchi doesn't seem to be acting *too* oddly."
10YEN-RANMA: What, is she mad? He's *responding* to
female attention. That's totally odd for him.
TENCHI: What were you saying, Pot?
[...]
Shrugging, she went back to her researches on reversing a water
'curse'.
WASHU: I've now given you the *reverse* of a water curse.
Hot fire turns you into a girl, and cold fire turns you back!
TENCHI: ;_;
[...]
The alarm clock buzzed, and Tenchi, male this time, groped blindly
and shut it off.
CLOCK: Oh my! Your hand is cold!
TENCHI: Damn Washu and her "novelty" clock...
[...]
After taking care of certain morning necessities, he groggily filled
the wash pail with cold water and then sat down on the stool near
the furo, facing the door. He scrubbed himself down for a few
minutes, and he then dumped the pail over his head, rinsing the suds
off.
Does soap even work if you're not already wet? ^_^;
"BRRRRR!"
10YEN-RANMA: You're contractually obligated
to say "It's cold," now.
The door to the room opened, and Tenchi's father, Nobuyuki, stood
there with his mouth open.
"Ohayou, Oyaji." <Huh?> "EEP!!!" Tenchi clamped her hands over her
mouth and looked up at Nobuyuki.
10YEN-RANMA: Your MOUTH isn't what you need to cover...
Her father's jaw was now down to
his bellybutton, a thick string of drool hanging out of his mouth
and pooling on the tile. Tenchi noticed that she was sitting in a
very unfeminine position, legs spread and giving her father a rather
unrestricted view of her unmentionables.
NOBUYUKI: Actually, I wouldn't mind mentioning-- Urk!
"Grrr." Tenchi slammed her knees together in a sudden attack of
feminine modesty and scooped up a pail of warm water from the furo,
dumping it over her head. Nobuyuki promptly fainted, a circle of
skipping redheads over him.
NOBUYUKI: My son's a babe! Oh, how I've waited for this day.
TENCHI: Eh?!
NOBUYUKI: Now that you are mature, I can tell you the whole truth.
Whenever the members in our family get excited, they change sex.
TENCHI: EH!?
NOBUYUKI: The truth is... *I* am your mother!
WASHU: [walks in] It's the strangest thing. There's no way
Mihoshi's cap was heavy enough to push the button... I
don't know why you turned into a girl.
TENCHI: [passes out]
[...]
After several minutes, Nobuyuki came to and shifted into a sitting
position, his eyes blinking. "Tenchi, did you see a gorgeous, um,
very healthy, redheaded girl just a little bit ago?"
NOBUYUKI: And I mean *natural* redhead! [waggle eyebrows]
[...]
"Hentai. Your own son," Tenchi muttered.
NOBUYUKI: My son's a hentai? Oh, how I've waited for this day!
TENCHI: Eh?!
NOBUYUKI: Now that you are mature, I can tell you the whole truth--
TENCHI: Shutupshutupshutup!!!
[...]
Breakfast was an odd affair. Tenchi, raggedly shorn of his excess
locks, was more silent than usual, and only replied in grunts when
spoken to.
RANMA-SAMA: Getting in touch with his masculinity, I see.
10YEN-RANMA: I wish I could do that. [glares offscreen]
Instead of OTHER people touching IN my femininity!
NABIKI: [pouting] I didn't even get to keep the money.
Masaki Katsuhito, Tenchi's grandfather, appeared in the doorway,
wondering what all the commotion was about. Tenchi hung her head and
rose from the table, slowly backing up towards her grandfather.
"I'm going back to bed," Tenchi said.
TENCHI: [glaring] Alone.
KATSUHIKO: Aw...
[...]
"I just can't deal with school today." Tenchi turned around, and
Katsuhito enjoyed the rare sensation of two comfy breasts squishing
into his palms. He barely resisted the urge to squeeze.
KATSUHIKO: Ooh, C-cup!
[...]
Tenchi jumped back, crossing her arms over her chest. "JIICHAN!"
TENCHI: How did you know I like older men? [coo]
[...]
Katsuhito raised both eyebrows for half a second, and then he
resumed his normally inscrutable demeanor. He nodded his head and
hummed, and he turned and walked out of the dining area.
RANMA-SAMA: Only centuries of inscruability
training protected him from facefaulting.
COLOGNE: You should try in from on top of a staff.
[...]
Everyone was downstairs. Tenchi had obviously elected to not spend
his day off from school in bed, and he was seated a little distance
away from the rest, in a position, the priest thought, to avoid
unnecessary dousings. He allowed one eyebrow to creep back up at the
long, luxuriant hair cascading down the back of Tenchi's chair.
<I'll loan him a hair tie.>
TENCHI: Uh... this is a scrunchie.
KATSUHIKO: But it makes you look so cute!
Standing quietly, Katsuhito turned his attention to the girls. His
gaze examined each of them and finally rested on Ryouko, who was
intent on the daytime drama unfolding on the television screen. He
allowed the corners of his mouth to turn up a little. As Tenchi
would occasionally look over at the others, he noticed that his
grandson's gaze would linger slightly longer on the space pirate.
TENCHI: [thinking] If I turn my back, she'll splash me and try
to crawl into my lap again. Better keep an eye on her.
[...]
<She'll be good for him, if I'm reading that correctly, albeit a
handful.> He sighed. <The fallout is not going to be pretty,
though.> He brooded on the elder of his two sisters as he climbed
the stone steps leading to his place of work.
AYEKA: B- But what about me?
KATSUHIKO: I'm sorry, Ayeka, but...
AYEKA: If he doesn't marry me, then you'll have to.
KATSUHIKO: ...
AYEKA: And you'll have to be prince, again.
KATSUHIKO: Now that I think of it, Tenchi's
man enough for more than one wife...
[...]
Tenchi was enjoying the relative quiet engendered by his, er, state
and was enjoying being able to watch television in peace.
TV: Yappa pa Yappa pa
TENCHI: Damn you! Damn you, Ranma!
[...]
"Errr... Tenchi-sama?" Aeka looked a little worried.
"Yeah?"
"Are you not going to change back?"
TENCHI: [gets up and gets hot water]
SASAMI: [grabs Tenchi's seat] Yes!
TENCHI: [walking back] Hey! My seat!
RYOKO: Yes, it's very nice. Now sit down
so we can watch the show.
suggest: Aren't you
[...]
Mihoshi had initially divided her attention between Tenchi and the
television, but as the drama picked up again, she was lost to the
program. During a steamy scene, Aeka turned and watched Tenchi for a
time. Tenchi began to feel a little uncomfortable and started to
fidget; she felt like Aeka was weighing her or something, as if
she'd forgotten who Tenchi was. The current scene on the TV ended,
and Aeka looked back at the screen. Now, it was Ryouko's turn to
stare.
RANMA-SAMA: It's uncanny how they time it so no more than
one of them is staring at Tenchi at a time...
If Tenchi had been uncomfortable before, she was now mentally
writhing under Ryouko's hot gaze. She could almost feel it caressing
her body, but the odd thing, Tenchi observed, was that it was
pleasant, in a tingly sort of way. She flicked a glance in the space
pirate's direction. Ryouko had one elbow on the arm of the couch,
and her hand was against her face as she studied the redhead, her
little finger bent and being chewed on.
RYOKO: Stop that, Ryo-Ohki!
RYO-OHKI: [gnawing] Miya?
Tenchi was almost sorry she'd looked. She absently rubbed her legs
together, feeling the rough cloth of her drawstring pants against
her soft skin. She was also feeling decidedly warm. Tenchi exerted
some self-control and focused her attention on the television. It
was another steamy scene... with two women. <Oh, great,> Tenchi
thought sourly.
GIRL: Mmm, Willow. [moan writhe] Redheads are the best.
TENCHI: [thinks] Don't look at anyone.
Just look straight ahead...
They were kissing passionately and slowly disrobing each other. The
lighting faded until only silhouettes could be seen. The taller
woman pulled the other's shirt down over her arms, and she kissed
the rise of Tenchi's bare bosom. Tenchi then began unbuttoning
Ryouko's shirt, but Ryouko then pushed Tenchi down onto the bed and
out of view of the camera. Without realizing it, Tenchi's
imagination had taken over, filling in for the missing visuals.
10YEN-RANMA: Uh, that probably should have been put sooner.
RYOKO: I don't have a problem with it where it is!
[...]
"AAAAAHHH!!!" Tenchi leapt to her feet, panting and staring at a
startled Ryouko. "Don't *LOOK* at me like *THAT*! Now I'm all
*HORNY*-- MMMRRFFF!!"
10YEN-RANMA: Is this the point when Washu gets her hand on a
copy of Urusei Yatsura and turns girl-type Tenchi into
an oni girl?
AYEKA: [frowning] Great, then we'd have a matched pair...
RYOKO: Here you go Mom. You know what to do!
[winks, slips a UY comic to Washu]
Tenchi had slapped her hands over her mouth... too late. Everyone
else was still confused at her outburst, but Tenchi's eyes bulged as
Ryouko slowly smiled in feline satisfaction.
RYOKO: [munching] That damn mouse won't keep me up anymore!
----
10YEN-RANMA: Well, this fic is largely arbitrary.
RANMA-SAMA: Not that that's a bad thing... ^_^
10YEN-RANMA: True, although it seems like it's being used to
setup Ryoko and Tenchi. Ryoko's all hot and bothered
by girl-type Tenchi, but for some reason, Ayeka has
forgotten she loves him, and suddenly thinks of him as
a sister.
RANMA-SAMA: Which is doubly odd, since she was prepared to
marry her brother. Wouldn't that make it a turn-on for
Ayeka?
10YEN-RANMA: [blushing] Ah, anyway, it makes the situation
a little hard to swallow.
RANMA-SAMA: You always did have trouble swallowing...
10YEN-RANMA: [sweatdrop] Uh, anyway, this seems much better
suited to be a fun fic, rather than resolving anyone's
relationships. I mean, it's not like any of MY problems
have even been solved. Wouldn't making Tenchi more
like me only escalate his problems?
RANMA-SAMA: Besides, Donny wants to see a nice big orgy
between all the cast members, not just Ryoko.
NOBUYUKI: Woohoo!
RANMA-SAMA: Not you.
NOBUYUKI: [poutiung] Aw...
10YEN-RANMA: Well, that's about it. Looking forward to the
next part!
RANMA-SAMA: Yeah, I want to change back into a guy so I stop
feeling these (um) urges...
10YEN-RANMA: I was talking about Onna-Tenchi Muyo.
RANMA-SAMA: Hey, he writes me, too! I can look forward to the
next part of Accidental Goddess. The longer it takes,
the longer I'm stuck as a girl!
10YEN-RANMA: You almost sound like your old self.
RANMA-SAMA: You know how it is. The horomones wax and wane.
10YEN-RANMA: Wax and wane? [scratches head] You mean come and go?
RANMA-SAMA: Emphasis on "come," I'm afraid.
10YEN-RANMA: [littlesweat] Thank God mine was just a oneshot.
US MINT: Anyone want to help us with our new gold one dollar
coin advertising campagn? Mr. Roeder?
10YEN-RANMA: ...
Doug
----
Douglas MacDougall "You were nicer when you were evil.
http://www.dougmacd.net Cuter, too. Definitely more sexy!"