Hello. Here (at last!) is part 2 of Hikari.
Please comment, this is DEFINITELY a rough draft that
needs a lot of work. But also, please enjoy!
Raye
=====
raye_j@yahoo.com
http://members.xoom.com/Raye01
Everyone is a philosopher.
Some people just get paid.
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Hikari
Part 2
by Raye Johnsen (raye_j@yahoo.com)
Events in this part may be difficult to understand if the reader
is unfamiliar with Part 1 of Hikari. Part 1 may be found at
http://members.xoom.com/Raye01/hikari.html
*******
Yu Yu Hakusho is copyright The Original Author, Jump Comics and
the producers of the anime. I have no rights and make no claim
to any.
*******
I stood in emptiness.
There wasn't anything. No sound, no light, no breeze, no
*nothing*.
"Faithless."
I whirled, trying to find the source of the sound.
"You faithless monster. You abandoned me."
Kurama stood in front of me, his back turned towards me.
I shook my head. "No, I didn't... I died..."
He turned towards me, keeping his face down. "You left me."
"I didn't want to! I died!" I yelled at him. "I didn't have
a choice!"
His face lifted, and I stared at the ravaged face. What
could grieve him so, draw such painful lines in his eyes?
"You did this to me," he whispered. "You abandoned me."
As if a searchlight above him winked out, he vanished.
Suddenly released, I ran towards where he'd been, and clutched...
air. Nothing but air.
"Did he lie?"
I stiffened. I knew that voice.
"Did I leave him?"
I looked up at my own face, into my crimson eyes.
"Come back," I whispered. This was wrong. I couldn't be
there. I was here, I was me; *I* was Hiei.
"No," I whispered, terribly aware I was a four year old
ningen.
My former self looked at me, implacably. I don't know why
some people (read: That Idiot) always said I appeared to be
emotionless; I am as given as any other to laughter and tears.
My emotions are easily read - I just don't grin at any little
amusement and I don't frown at a minor disappointment. And right
now, I was upset.
Well, that made two of me.
"Did he lie?" I asked myself again.
"No," I whispered, shaking my head in denial. This wasn't
happening. I wrapped my child's arms around my child's body. "No,
no, no..."
"He's right."
"No," I denied again. "NO!"
I sat up sharply, flinging back the covers on my bed.
"Hikari-chan?" Okaasan questioned me gently, taking my hand.
"Are you all right?" Otousan asked me softly from the other
side of my bed.
I was in bed, I was in my family's home, I was Hino Hikari
and I was almost four years old. I flung myself into Okaasan's
arms and let myself cry.
Some people might think that's a great concession on my
part, because I didn't trust many people in my last life, but
Okaasans and Otousans don't betray you. None that I've ever
known, that is.
My first Okaasama and Otousama had loved each other. This
would not be a big thing here in Ningenkai, but in Makai, Fire
Demons and Ice Maidens do not associate, much less fall in love.
But they did.
When the other Ice Maidens found out about Otousama and
Okaasama, they killed Otousama. They would have killed Okaasama
too, but she was with child, and they didn't want to execute the
innocent Ice Maiden she was carrying. So they waited until she
was brought to bed - with my sister and I.
I've often pictured it in my mind. Okaasama, barely able to
stand, still weak from giving birth less than an hour before,
holding me tightly, held at the edge of the cliff they flung
Otousama from. She straightens against the wind, defiant against
the icy blizzard, cradles me closer, and steps off as they prod
her, curling around me as we fall, shielding my body from the
rocks, so that I survive, even though she doesn't...
It probably didn't happen that way. But I have to believe
in something and I choose to believe my youkai parents loved me.
There are worse things to believe in.
My parents in this life, too, love each other dearly.
They're abstracted with the rest of the world, but all of the
heroes in Okaasan's manga are swordsmen who resemble Otousan to
some degree, and Otousan idolizes Okaasan. They both treasure me,
and I know just how lucky I am.
As I clung to Okaasan, I could feel the worried looks they
were trading. This was the fifth night in a row I'd woken up
screaming.
Otousan stood up and left my bedroom quietly while Okaasan
tried to soothe me. I'd stopped sobbing and was now hiccuping
occasionally as she cradled me.
"Hikari-chan," Otousan's voice was warm with suppressed
excitement. "Look at this."
I lifted my head from Okaasan's shoulder to look at what
Otousan was holding out towards me. It was a giant blue-purple
stuffed bird that wasn't like any bird I'd ever seen, but if I
had to identify it, I'd say it was a penguin.
Hesitantly, I took the toy. It may have *looked* odd, but
it was very well made. It felt warm to the touch, and was even
covered in soft, short feathers.
"You can hold this at night and as you sleep, it will chase
the bad dreams away," Otousan told me quietly as I examined the
stuffed bird.
"Thank you, Otousan," I told him, trying to be calm. "It's
beautiful."
"What will you call it?" Okaasan asked me.
I've never been very good at originality. "Pen-chan?" I
ventured.
Okaasan smiled at Otousan, and they both stood and quietly
left as I examined Pen-chan. There was something about him that
I felt I knew.
It was much the same way as I knew he was a 'he' and 'Pen-
chan' was close but not *quite* right. I knew I knew Pen-chan.
Hesitantly, I gently hugged Pen-chan. Otousan had been right
- I *did* feel more safe. Holding him, I drifted into a much more
peaceful sleep.
******
"She's got a *very* tight grip," Yuusuke said, wincing.
Kurama grinned. "*You're* the one who said she'd recognise
a silver fox, Yuusuke. I was perfectly willing to volunteer."
"Stop it, Kurama-san," Keiko scolded him. Turning her
attention to her husband, she asked, "*Is* it so very bad?"
Yuusuke sighed, leaning back into the couch. "No, but she's
very upset and it's kinda uncomfortable."
The young woman who sat on the other couch sat up.
"Urameshi-san, *is* Hiei-san all right? Really?"
"Don't worry, Yukina-san," the redheaded man sitting beside
her said. "Your brother is very strong." He grimaced. "I know."
"She's drifting off to sleep. She had a nightmare, but she's
calmed down now. Puu says she's suspicious but trusting."
Kurama nodded. "Hiei," he commented knowingly.
"And her name is 'Hikari'."
The final member of the group drew back on her cigarette.
"Appropriate."
Yukina looked at her sister-in-law. "What do you mean,
Shizuru-san?"
Shizuru smiled. "'Hikari' means 'light'. I can't help
thinking that she seems to have taken the opportunity for a
second chance - a life filled with light."