Hokay, I'm going to let this chapter loose. Nobody walk barefoot
in the kitchen....
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters from Ranma One
Half and Ah My Goddess. Hmmm. Rumiko Takahashi and Viz
and a whole bunch more have dibs on Ranma et al, Fujishima
Kousuke and Animeigo takes credit for associating Urd of Norse
mythology with kawaii features and a computer engineering degree,
Cinderella is an old fairy tale, which leaves me with Hainoko.
Not to worry, since I don't figure on making any money off this,
anyway. No gerbils were harmed in the writing of this fanfic
(who said that first?). Caution: Loose canon.
ASHES - A Cinderella Story
Chapter Two
If Wishes were Pigs
Take precious thread and weave it true
Crimson sheer and silken blue
Let us swing and let us sway
Chapter Two is on its way.
RYOGA:
-begin help screen-
Wording of the wish is extremely important. However, the
subject may sometimes have difficulty expressing a specific
heart's desire, either because the exact specifications are
not known, the subject may have subconscious barriers to
admitting a desire for the end object, or the environment in
which the subject exists forces them to alter their request in
an unforeseen manner. It is important that you look in the
heart of the person making the request as well as looking to
the express wording. (from: A Few of the Basic Rules for the
Temporary Fairy Godmother)
He was trying to get to heaven, trying to straighten out the
mess. While this was his intent, of course, being Ryoga, he
wound up far away from where he had intended to go. He was in
Japan, which - although it has been reputedly described as next
door to heaven, was not the destination he was seeking. Trying
for the next best choice, he grabbed the nearest passerby and
demanded, "Where is the Tendo dojo?"
"Hey, no need to get anxious, Ryoga," said Hiroshi. "We're going
by there. It's only a few blocks straight ahead."
"Do you want a lead rope?" grinned Daisuke.
"No!"
"Just offering," said Daisuke, turning back to Hiroshi. "I still
say athletes get more babes."
"That's just publicity, paid for by the sponsors. For me, a rock
star is the way to go. I'd like to have a better voice and more
talent than the greatest rock star alive. Part of the time, that
is. I'd want to be able to go home and chill out with the rest of
you ordinary people the rest of the time."
"Hah!" snorted Daisuke. "You wish!"
"Yeah," Hiroshi said dreamily, "I wish."
Ryoga cast his eyes about uneasily, walking with his feet planted
firmly on the pavement. After a block of these cautious steps, he
asked Hiroshi, "So, who is the world's greatest rock star?"
"I dunno," Hiroshi tried to think. "There are so many."
"There's Rock Cliff," Daisuke supplied.
"Don't make me puke! The only reason we're going to this concert
is for the chick fallout when he starts putting gerbils in his
mouth!"
"I thought we decided that was lame."
"Better lame than alone, I say."
"Hey, Ryoga!" Ranma greeted them as they entered the dojo yard,
"Where'd you go this morning? That was a smooth exit! Hi, guys!
What brings you around here?"
"Murphlasdfgarstn," mumbled Ryoga helpfully.
"We're going to the benefit and we wanted to see if you had
changed your mind about going...as yourself. Really. We have
tickets."
Daisuke blurted, "I didn't mean to make you angry! Honest!"
"Sorry, guys," Ranma shook his head. "I heard about Rock Cliff.
Them things just ain't my cup of tea. Too loud."
"I thought martial artists were supposed to be able to endure any
amount of pain."
"Nope. Why don't you get Ryoga to go with you?"
"Hey, would you, Ryoga-kun? We have an extra ticket. Hate to
see it go to waste."
"Sorry," mumbled Ryoga. "I have to get a drink of water." He
preceded them into the house.
"Think about it!" Hiroshi called after him, "It's not often you
get to see that kind of talent!"
"Thank the gods," muttered Ranma. "You guys want a drink? I
think Kasumi has tea ready. 'Scuse me, I been sweatin'. I gotta
take a bath."
THE TENDO HOUSE:
Soun yawned and stretched, keeping an eye on the shoji board and
a certain panda, which also yawned and stretched while keeping an
eye on him.
Nabiki sat down quickly as the boys walked in, moving her
backpack to one side. Something clanked underneath and she
glanced about to see if the noise had been heard.
"Daddy, have you seen the comics section of the paper?" she said,
"Oh, hi, Ryoga-kun."
"Ummmh," Ryoga scratched the back of his head. "I wanted to tell
Akane something. Do you know where she is?"
"She's in the kitchen, getting psyched up to cook supper," Nabiki
spoke with hooded eyes. "Be afraid. Be very afraid."
They heard Ranma's female voice crying from the bathroom, "What
is it with this hot water? It's broke again!"
"That's too bad, Ranma!" Nabiki called, "The repairman should be
here tomorrow." [Unless I can divert him, somehow.]
"Why does this always have to happen? I wish this darn thing
would stay fixed for awhile!"
[Why does it happen? Oh, I don't know. Let me count the ways -
Camera full of film, check. Verbal commission for pictures,
check. Heating element removed, check.] "Don't have any idea,
Ranma! You'll just have to make do for tonight!" She listened
to the griping, grinned, and turned to Ryoga. "How about you? I
know where to get a GPS receiver, cheap."
"Thanks. I had one," Ryoga got his bearings and launched himself
toward the kitchen. "Funny," he paused to say, "I didn't know
computers had suicide hot lines...."
Suddenly Nabiki grabbed the table to steady herself and asked,
"Was that an earthquake I just felt?"
"May have been," Soun said, glancing around unconcernedly while
keeping one eye on the board.
"Hey!" came Ranma's male voice again, "It's working now!"
Nabiki snapped to full alert. "It's _what_?" She picked up the
wrench and heater element. "Something is strange, here!"
In the kitchen, Ryoga had suddenly become tongue-tied.
"Uh...Akane...."
"Yes, Ryoga?"
"Akane...I want you to know that if there is ever anything you
want...just wish for it, I will get it for you. Anything. Isn't
there something you wish for, more than anything in the world?"
"Oh, Ryoga...yes," Akane's eyes misted. She brushed a hand over
the picture of the Tendo family at an earlier, happier time. Her
father had taken it out earlier and had been mooning over it.
"Errr...." Ryoga halted. Surely she was not going to wish for
THAT. "Maybe I should have said...." He did not want to know if
it was possible to bring back Akane's mother, especially if she
appeared as a ghost. Not to mention the fact that such a
powerful wish would give a certain demoness his location. He
shuddered. He did not want to face the wraith again.
"But I would not bring her back, and take her from her peace,"
Akane sighed. She did not notice the relief on Ryoga's face.
"I swear, Akane!" cried Ryoga, "If there is anything you want,
all you have to do is wish!"
"Ryoga," Akane reached up to touch his cheek. "You are such a
thoughtful and considerate friend. Thank you for caring."
Ryoga staggered off, torn between delirious joy at her touch and
unfathomable depression because she still did not understand how
deeply he loved her. A splash and P-Chan was in her lap. As
P-Chan, Ryoga could be close to Akane and grant her every wish.
Thus, he was there when Ranma provoked her.
"I'm not saying that the last miso soup you made was quite as bad
as turpentine..." Ranma managed to insert his foot in his mouth
and talk at the same time.
"Ranma! You never say anything good about my cooking!"
P-Chan sprang to alertness. Now, if she became angry enough, she
would wish Ranma away, far away!
"Yeah, that soup was good, like rancid yak butter tastes good.
At least someone can eat yak butter!"
Akane shoved to her feet, dumping P-Chan onto the floor. "You
never give me a chance! I wish...."
YES! The little black pig quivered with excitement. Yes! This
was it!
"I wish...I wish...." Akane nearly fell over the bouncing,
frantic pig. "P-Chan, be careful! Now, what was I saying?"
The little black pig backed away, trying to quiver unnoticed as
he strained to project his thoughts, [_Say it! Say it!_]
"I wish for once I could cook a really good meal! That would
show you! That would show all of you!"
No one noticed the shuddering vibration except the little pig,
who was moping toward the bathroom with tears in his eyes.
"In fact, that is what I am going to do right now! You just
wait!" Akane slammed off into the kitchen to make good on her
word. She did.
Akane cooked a great meal. It was beautiful. It was fabulous.
And...no one ate it. No one of the immediate household, that is.
Daisuke ate some cabbage turnovers and persimmon dumplings, but
the meal looked and smelled so delicious that he could not
resist. He thought that the few bites he could eat, before the
food was wrenched from his grasp, tasted great.
So did the traveling troupe of mimes who found a feast spread
hastily out on the sidewalk out of Akane's sight. The mimes ate
and ate and left rubbing their tummies and making signs of
contentment to indicate their pleasure, but being mimes they
could not say out loud how good the food was.
Ryoga appeared shortly after, said, "Hellogoodbye," and left
towing Hiroshi and Daisuke. Daisuke was glad enough to leave, as
he could not figure out why everyone was regarding him with such
pity.
"Someone stacked our dinner dishes out on the sidewalk," said
Kasumi. "Now, why would anyone do that?"
Akane glared at everyone and received guilty looks in return.
Kasumi held one of the dishes up to the light. "It has been
licked clean," she noted, "But there was no one there."
"Probably on their way to the emergency room," Ranma guessed.
Soun began to tune up the sprinklers. "Oh, the humanity!" he
cried.
"Will you guys stop that?" Akane cried, "At least Daisuke liked
it!"
"Yeah," sighed Ranma as he prepared to run, but not fast enough.
"I'm gonna miss him. Ow!"
HIROSHI:
-begin help screen-
Your response, upon hearing a request, should be to reaffirm
that the request is valid. This may take the form of a
question, such as, "Is that your desire?" or perhaps, "Do you
really want to wish for that?" or "Is that your final answer?"
The first few times you submit a request you may inadvertently
overlook this, since timing is critical. The system has
checks and balances to prevent blatantly wrong wishes from
becoming fulfilled, but it is possible for a properly
validated wish to accomplish something other than the desired
goal. In fact, this is the very nature of wish-giving, since
most people ask for something they don't really want since
they do not know, or will not admit to themselves, what is
needed. This is the Art of wish-giving, to provide what is
truly desired, even though it may not be what they thought
they wanted. (from: A Few of the Basic Rules for the
Temporary Fairy Godmother)
"Y'know," I said as I polished off the ice cream cone, "I have a
dream. I have always wanted to be a singer. Making money,
having fans. I sometimes wish I was a rock singer."
I noticed Ryoga grimacing. He did not appear to be happy to go
with us to the concert, but he went anyway. Maybe he did not
enjoy sneaking past the gate guards. I told him I was sorry the
tickets weren't any good. They were for next week, in Kyosho,
and Daisuke had not read them carefully. Two guesses where he
bought them. It was just as well that we got separated at the
gate. I saw him later, on the other side of the building, but by
then it was too late.
"What's wrong with wishing?" I asked, "It helps to pass the
time."
Ryoga appeared to be watching something outside my range of
vision. "Things have a way of coming true around me," he
whispered.
I stuck out my chin. "I wish...."
Ryoga covered his ears. "I don't want to hear it again!"
"...I wish...I want to be a rock singer! There! How's that for
a dumb wish? I ain't got the looks, and I ain't got the voice.
Plus, my parents would never let me out of the house."
The neon reflected eerily from Ryoga's eyes. "It didn't happen
before. Maybe it won't happen now," he said, and he seemed
to cheer up. "Hey! It doesn't happen every time!"
I found an open door behind the stage and we stole in. "We can
see the first part of the show from here," I said.
The show began, and we watched the opening act as a scrawny kid
stomped out on stage and began to warble.
"I can understand you wanting to sound better than that!" Ryoga
shuddered.
"He's just getting the audience warmed up," I shrugged. "Rock
Cliff is due up next! He's gross, but he can sing great!"
"And you want to be better," Ryoga sighed.
"I wish it with all my heart," I sighed. "Just for a little
while. Like I said, I wouldn't want to give up my regular life
for it, mind you."
As the scrawny kid left the stage, the announcer led a spattering
of applause and began a long rambling introduction for the next
act. Rock Cliff could not make it because of a bus breakdown.
In his place....
...Into his place on stage walked the most beautiful girl I had
ever seen, dressed in yellow and moving like a vision of heaven.
As the music rose, she performed a dance routine. As she sang
the first line, I shouted with excitement.
"Isn't she fabulous? Her name is Primrose. She is the
greatest!"
Ryoga fidgeted. "She's the greatest?" he repeated, as if in disbelief.
"She's the best, man!" Didn't he hear me?
"But that's a...."
"Yeah. Ain't she something?"
"The greatest looks?"
"She's a knockout!"
"The greatest voice?"
"Listen! Doesn't it send shivers down your spine?"
"You don't know how much," Ryoga shuddered. "And now it's too
late."
"Eh? What did you say?"
There was a steadily growing rumble which drowned out all
thought.
"I said...." Ryoga had to yell to make himself heard above the
din, "I said...."
-poof-
I reached for him. Then I looked at the hand grasping Ryoga's
shirt, a slender female hand which was attached to a slender
female arm which was covered with a brilliant blue sleeve which
was attached to a thin blouse which was attached to...me. I
released him and in a calm, dignified voice, expressed my opinion
about the situation.
"Acckkkk!" I said.
"Hiroshi?" Ryoga asked. He was pointing at me, his forefinger
wavering in a sketchy circle.
"Ack!" I said, brightly, feeling my eyes expanding like dinner
plates, in alarm.
"Hiroshi? You're...."
"Ack!" I said again, feeling my chin bounce off the floor.
Three or four times.
"Oops..."
"Ack!" I repeated, for good measure. My breasts were jaunting
perkily. What distressed me was that I could _see_ my breasts.
I was no body builder. These were not pecs, built up from months
of hard labor on the rowing machine. These were _boobs_.
Female boobs. What was worse was that they were clearly visible
for the world to see, as well, through the almost sheer blue material
of the blouse, hindered only by strategically placed blue ribbons.
"Sorry...."
"Ack!" Sorry? He was sorry? If he was sorry, what was I? I
was...I was.... There was something awfully familiar about this,
but for once I was seeing it from the wrong perspective. Those
perky boobs, that slim waist swelling into thrilling hips, that
impossible, compelling, sultry voice - voice?
"I'm a girl?"
Nodnodnod.
"How?"
Ryoga actually seemed in pain. "This sort of thing has been
happening to me, lately," he said in an embarrassed voice.
"You? Whaddya mean, you? I'm the one it happened to!"
He scratched the back of his head and grinned sourly, "Wishes
have been coming true around me, but I can't talk about it. All
I can say is that I think it's something in my aura that triggers
it. Yeah. That seems safe enough."
"I didn't wish to be a _girl_!"
"You said you wanted to have more talent and look better than the
greatest rock star."
"But I meant a _guy_ rock star!"
"And then you said Primrose was the greatest."
[Arrgghh!!] "But I didn't mean - "
"Hey, you two!" a uniformed security guard shouted, "Get outta
here! This is a restricted area!" Several more guards joined
him. They were big, tough, and they carried nightsticks. It was
then that I did several things wrong.
I panicked, which was mistake #1.
I ran, which was mistake #2.
I followed Ryoga.
Mistake #3.
Strike three. I was out. On the stage. In front of millions
and millions of staring eyes. Well, hundreds of staring eyes -
that was bad enough. As a girl. Wearing - or almost not wearing
- a brilliant sparkling blue mini-dress with a lace stole, with
blue ribbons in strategic locations. Ryoga was nowhere in sight.
I mean, what's a guy to do, given the circumstances? Behind me,
the guards were preparing to rush the stage and grab me. They
only held off because they were checking to see if I was part of
the show.
So, I froze. For ages of seconds, we stared at each other, the
audience and I, and they began to make an ugly sound.
-Drool!-
I mean, _really_ ugly.
Then they began to chant, softly at first, until everyone was
calling, insisting, "Sing something! Sing something!"
Me? Sing? I could remove paint with my voice. Pops said he
would never need to buy sandpaper when he had me around. Stray
cats followed me around for inspiration. They wanted _me_ to
sing?
"Sing something! SING something!"
There once was a lady from Osaka...no, forget that....
[They're gonna kill me....]
So, I tried to sing. When I cleared my throat, a silence fell,
as deafening in its own way as the previous thundering demands.
I remembered hearing Mom humming a lullaby that morning. It was
nothing, just a pleasant melody she had sung to Hainoko when she
was a baby. So it wasn't a pop tune. It was the only thing I
could think of at the time.
"Hush, little baby...."
The audience loved it. They ate it up. The band took up the
melody and improvised, jazzed it up and blasted out a sax solo
when I stopped to catch my breath. There was a band? I didn't
know there was a band. Oh, yeah. The Primrose Path. Off-stage,
a girl in pale yellow stood watching me. She seemed as
awe-struck as the audience.
It was a simple lullaby, for kami's sake. You would have thought
it was the most inspirational, pulse-pounding, thrilling aria
ever recorded.
Maybe it was the way my new voice said, "Baby."
The sound of girls cheering and muttering enviously was only
drowned out by the sound of guys cheering and slobbering.
Overcome with passion, fans began to swarm the stage.
If they were overcome with passion, I was overcome with panic.
Girls with souvenir scissors. Guys with roses and amorous
gleams in their eyes. Again, I ran.
This time the guards were actually helping me, politely hustling
me out a side door so I could get away. The mob spotted me again
and was about to catch me when I rounded a corner.
-poof-
I was myself, again, plain old Hiroshi. I did not ask questions.
I was me! The mob rushed on past. No one paid any attention to
me, so intent were they on their pursuit.
I walked away, back stiff, my eyes held rigidly ahead, and
eventually managed to find Ryoga. He was reading the inscription
on his bracelet by the light of a streetlamp. A TV news crew
bustled past us, the anchorwoman peering into the shadows and
searching the shrubbery.
The news woman approached us, still searching. "Have you seen
that girl?" she asked.
"What girl?" I asked innocently.
"That singer in blue! She was magnificent! She was wonderful!
And no one knows who she is or where she went!"
"She disappeared like Cinderella," added the cameraman.
I glanced at Ryoga. He looked at me. "Haven't seen her!" we chorused.
"I have to interview her!" the news woman said, "She is the find
of the century! I'll pay you if you can get her name!"
This caught my attention. "Pay? How much?" Before she could
name a figure, Ryoga had grabbed me and dragged me away with him.
I lost track of him almost immediately.
I got home after midnight, but Pops was already asleep.
HIROSHI:
"Ah Wop Bop alubop Ah Lop Bam Boom!"
I loved the shower. The furo was great for soaking, but the
shower had acoustics. I could hold the scrub brush like a
microphone and really put my soul into the song.
Last night seemed like a nightmare. I had inventoried my assets
and determined that I was still a walking, talking male. And
singing, also, although that part never seemed to last long.
There were always interruptions.
"Hiroshi!"
I wiped the water out of my eyes and stuck my head outside the
curtain. "Yes, Mom?"
"Hiroshi, please hold it down. The neighbors are _complaining_."
"Aww, Mom! I can't sound THAT bad! And besides, the neighbors
left on vacation for a week."
"It is the neighbors beyond them. And the ones from across the
street. Hiroshi-chan? Please?"
"Awww...right." She simply did not appreciate good music. After
all, that was an American love song - a classic.
Mother was waiting with breakfast and a hug, which I tried
unsuccessfully to shrug off. She seemed tired when she said,
"You have _so many_ other qualities, Hiro-chan. You should work
on them."
"Okay, Mom," I sighed resignedly. Hainoko shoved in front of
me at the table. "Hey!" I complained, "That's my seat!"
Hainoko smirked at me, "You only want this seat because it is
closer to the rice bowl."
"Hainoko, give him his place," said Pops, engrossed in the
morning's sports news. Hainoko grudgingly scooted over.
"And, Hiroshi-kun, I want you to walk your little sister to
school, today," Mom said as she served the soup.
"Why? That's way out of my way!"
"Don't argue, please. She has no one to walk with, and I don't
want her on the streets _alone_."
"What's the matter, Insect?" I said to Hainoko, "Nobody like you
enough to walk with you?"
Hainoko blinked at me. "Yoriko had to go to her grandmothers for
a week. After all, it's just for a few days. Then the space
aliens will come along and take me away and you won't have to
worry about me."
"Space aliens would bring you back as soon as they heard you
whine, Rodent! Cry, cry, cry, cry!"
"Mom!"
"Don't tease her, Hiroshi."
"(Sigh) All right, Mom."
"Here, Hai-chan. I fixed lunch in your favorite panda-bear
bento, so you be sure and enjoy it." Mom paused as if to
rest, then handed it to her.
"I will, Mommy," Hainoko gave me a warning look as if to say,
'If my big brother doesn't spoil it somehow'.
"Are you okay, Mom?" I asked. Hainoko crowded close to support
Mom when she seemed about to fall over.
"I am fine, children. Just a cold. It's nothing" - dramatic
pause - "life-threatening. You go on to school, now."
Pop looked up from his paper, which he was reading between
commercials on the miniscule table TV. The Giants had a good
start on the season and he wanted to see the highlights before
leaving for work.
"Back by midnight," he decreed.
"Sure, Pop. Can I stop over for a snack, somewhere?"
"If you're back by midnight."
"Pop, everyone else gets to stay -"
"Midnight."
Pop's voice did not waver. He could repeat the same word, tone
by tone, timbre by timbre, decibel by decibel, all day long. "You
need your sleep to maintain your virility," he explained.
"Okay, Pop," I said as I left the door open and cleared the steps
in a bound, headed for Daisuke's.
"Hiroshi!"
"Yes, Mom?"
"Please take Hainoko by her school."
Oh. Yeah. "Right, Mom. Sorry."
"Apologize to Hainoko. I am not the one offended."
I looked down at her. Apologize? Ewwww.
HAINOKO:
Bullies are not always boys, and they are not always from the
poorer neighborhoods. Hainoko desperately needed a friend. It
was not easy being a nobody in a school where the playground was
dominated by a two snobby bullies, even if those bullies were
girls.
The two sisters Deirdre and Deirdrum made Hainoko miserable,
taking her lunch and laughing when Hainoko cried, and then lying
about it when the playground supervisors came to see what was
wrong. They always made it seem like Hainoko had started the
fights, and her classmates always agreed with the snobs.
Hainoko needed a friend, and when she could not find one on the
playground she tried for the next best thing - an edge. She
became sneaky. In fact, Hainoko was so good at surviving that
there were days when she actually got to eat her own lunch. Not
that the bullies wanted her food. They only wanted to hurt and
humiliate someone, and Hainoko was handy. When they took the
food, they would throw it away, spoil it by spitting on it, or
pour dirt over the rice and fishcakes.
So, Hainoko spent her school days in a kind of living hell. The
only person who made it better was Yoriko, who had moved in next
door and walked to school with Hainoko. While the bullies would
pick on this neighbor girl also, they would not bother Hainoko
and Yoriko when they were together.
When Hainoko complained to her parents, she was disappointed.
Father was always too tired, or too busy, and he was
uncomfortable around schools. Mother never felt well enough to
go down to the school and talk to the principal, and Hiroshi -
well....
Hiroshi was a big brother. End of subject.
She stood at the gate, her bento clutched to her breast, not
wanting to cross the threshold into the war zone. Her
adversaries were in there, obscured by other children, but they
could find her as unerringly as sharks found distressed swimmers.
They could smell blood.
"What are you waiting for? Go on! I gotta get to school!"
Hiroshi encouraged her, in his own way.
Hainoko looked back at him, mutely pleading, but of course he
could not understand. He was a big boy. He never got in
trouble. He had a friend. With a sigh, she stepped through the
gate and awaited her doom. She felt, rather than saw, her
brother hurry away to his own schoolyard, where kids were nice to
one another. He never looked back. He did not see the ominous
shadows sliding up to her, nor hear the jeers as Deirdre and
Deirdrum found her bento and took it from her. He did not see
the bento flying over the fence to be crushed by a passing truck.
For Hainoko, it was just the start of another day.
HIROSHI:
I wanted to forget the events of the previous night. I wanted to
never hear of them again, but of course at school all the talk
was about the 'Cinderella Singer' who had popped up, sang a song,
then disappeared at the stroke of midnight.
That day at school was not quite normal. Oh, there were some
really weird Cinderella rumors, but I discounted them. What they
couldn't pin on me did not happen. What was unusual was when
Kodachi showed up. She looked awful. I mean she looks great,
especially when she dresses out for gym, but you could tell she
had been in a fight, and she had not won, and she was pissed.
We were eating lunch in the shade of the trees when black petals
began to fall about one side of the clearing. I was out of range, or
I would have been one of the first students who fell unconscious.
Ranma quickly grabbed Akane and carried her into the open, then
turned to face a whirlwind of razor-ribbons and gymnast's clubs.
"Stand aside, Dearest Ranma!" cried Kodachi. She was wearing her
combat leotard, which exposed the bruises on her thighs and legs.
"Do not protect this witch, Darling Ranma! She is not worthy!
She hides behind a mask to attack, and she leaves a common flower
as her calling card!"
Ranma blocked the missiles and cried, "Will ya lay off, Kodachi?
She's been with us all morning! There is no way she could have
attacked you!" Akane, who was fuming at Kodachi, looked at Ranma
in surprise, as if she expected him to add an insult. Her own
bruises from the day before had not faded.
He finally convinced her that Akane was innocent. The leotard
clad girl came closer, clasped Ranma and leaned her head against
his breast while she sobbed, "For you, Ranma-sama Dearest, I will
refrain from attacking this peasant!"
Then she leaped away, calling "But that cowardly masked girl,
whomever she is, shall feel my wrath! I will find her and show
her the revenge of the Kunos! HOHOHOHOHOHO!"
"Revenge of the Kunos?" I asked.
"If it's worse than bento-breath behind us, I don't wanna know."
"I heard that, Saotome!" Kuno growled, "Show some respect for
your sempai!"
"Yeah, yeah, sure. I just did."
HIROSHI:
I found Ryoga that night and later wished that I hadn't. I
dragged him home with me for a private conversation. I asked
him what had happened. Why had I been changed into a girl
and chased around like that? I got angry. I yelled at him,
and he took the abuse in the manner of a prize boar
ignoring a pesky fly. He merely shrugged and tried to avoid
talking about it, as if it were not real.
"I know it happened! You were there! You saw!" I was pulling at
my hair in frustration. "We were talking about wishing and I
said 'I want to be a rock star', and...."
-poof-
I went on in a decidedly softer, gentler voice, "...and now I am
again, and I didn't really want to be, and oh, Kami! I'm stuck
again. What if it is permanent? What am I going to do now?
Daisuke is coming over tonight! We were going to cruise the park
for chicks!"
There was a mirror by the door, and I used it, an action which I
instantly regretted. Looking at the blue diaphanous skirt and
tight waist coat I was wearing, I sighed. "Specially ones who
look just like this, darn it! I can't wear this in public! I
can see myself through it!" Myself. There was someone
standing in my place and she was a she, quite obviously,
and it was me, and I was going to start doing something
painful to that mirror very soon if I did not look away
from myself.
Ryoga was unhelpful. He was wearing one of those chain-link
bracelets with an inscribed plate. He kept reading the
inscription as if he could not remember what it said. "All I
know is that you have a recurring wish which requires a trigger
to make it work," he said. "Your trigger is...."
"I know! I know!" I blurted, "Saying the words 'I want to be a
rock star'!" I was unhappy. I was deeply depressed. Why did my
voice make me sound so thrilled to be alive that I could hug
everyone? Yeck. I did not _want_ to hug anyone.
He went on, "According to this, you will remain in your rock star
form for two hours, the average length of a rock performance.
You will quit turning into your other form, once you get what you
really wanted from the wish."
"This is not a rock star costume! This is a disgrace! This is
an embarrassment!"
He took a close look at me and turned abruptly away, staunching
his nose as he said, "Adyway, jewel be bag do dorbal affer doo
hours."
"I can't wait! I'll just have to find a way to undo it. I'll
say the words again! 'I want to be a rock star'! I don't want to
be a rock star! Star rock a be to want I! Hot water! Maybe
that will do it! No, it didn't! Cold water! I'll try that!
No, again! Dammit! Nothing does anything!"
"There is one gambit which might work, when Daisuke gets here,"
Ryoga said as he lifted his backpack.
"Anything! What?"
"I have learned of the Saotome ultimate secret technique, to be
used only in the face of total disaster."
"Great! What is it?"
"Run."
"Wouldn't that look great! A blue-eyed bimbo running through
down-town Nerima! Where the heck would I go?"
Ryoga shrugged. "That's your problem," he said, brushing his
hand of the entire matter.
"Waitaminute! You can't just walk off like this! This is partly
your fault, too, you know!"
"Quit pawing me!"
"Sorry. I was just carried away. I am about to be public
humiliated, and you grant wishes. Grant me this one wish!"
"No! No can do. And quit talking about it! Something bad will
happen!"
I wilted. "There has to be _something_ you can conjure up! Can't
you control it?"
Shrugging his backpack into place, Ryoga frowned. "The only way
I can explain it, something in my aura is conditioned to grant
wishes to some deserving, unselfish person. I don't get to
decide who that person is. And if I talk about it any more, we
are both going to regret it."
"I'll be deserving! I'll be unselfish!"
Ryouga paused, then asked, "What do you think of Akane?"
"What?"
"Do you think Akane is cute and deserving?"
"Are you off your rocker? Sure, I think Akane is cute, but...she
is also engaged to Ranma. I wouldn't want to spoil that!" [Not
and live to tell about it...if Ranma didn't kill me she would!]
"That's not what I was asking," Ryoga said, heading for the door.
"If you don't stay and at least try, I will start screaming!"
"Nani?" Ryoga paled and softly eased the door shut without
exiting.
"I said I would scream!"
He looked at me with a haunted gleam of fear in his eye. He
could handle charging rhinoceri, but he could not handle this.
He almost whimpered as he said, "But...but...isn't that sort
of...girlish?"
"Look at me, you blockhead! Do I look like a girl?"
"Uh...yeah."
"I AM a girl. Just like Ranma!"
Ryoga stiffened at the comparison, eyed me with sudden suspicion.
"You are not like Ranma," he declared. "I don't hate you...yet."
"Well, you are going to! How far are you going to get if I chase
you down the street accusing you of taking advantage of me?"
"Now...now...." Torn in two directions, Ryoga settled onto his
haunches and tried to reason with the boy-turned-girl. He would
have had more luck with Ranma. I was seething. Bubbling,
perkily seething.
"And furthermore...." I wanted to dump my whole life of misery
onto him. I wanted to let him know exactly what kind of trouble
he had caused. I never got the chance.
There was a sudden brightness as the door opened and someone
walked in. That someone stopped, stared, and cried out, "Woah!
You're here! This is great, and I beat Hiroshi to you! Boy, am
I lucky!"
"Daisuke? Oh, no!"
"How's about a date? Let's beat it before that joker Hiroshi gets
here."
I looked from Ryoga's confused frown to Daisuke's feverish grin
and I scowled, an expression which traveled with a knack worthy
of Ryoga's navigational skills until it became a calculating
smile as I accepted my fate.
"Of course!" I said, plastering all the sincerity I could muster
onto my face. I had to get a coat, a blanket, or anything to
cover up with. No way was I going out dressed as I was. "And
while you are buying me dinner, you can tell me about your
friend, Hiroshi."
"What friend, Hiroshi?" Daisuke drawled, wearing a sloppy, dazed
smile. If I didn't know him better, I would have called him an
oversexed, hormone-driven teenager with lust on the brain. As a
matter of fact, I did know him well enough to call him that.
"Say goodbye to Ryoga," I suggested, dragging Daisuke along
by the tie.
"Yeah, sure. Bai-bai, Rogy-kun."
"Hope you have money, sap," I muttered, drawing on one of Moms'
coats. It was about as fashionable as a tent. "This evening is
going to cost you plenty."
---------------
The evening was a mixed success. I had dined sumptuously and
extravagantly, with Daisuke footing the bill.
However.
I huddled in the booth with the edges of the tent drawn tight
around my neck. The heat was almost unbearable, but there was no
way I was going to allow any of these perverts a glimpse of what
lay underneath the canvas. Despite my best efforts, some of our
school chums had seen us, and they called Daisuke aside to talk
to him, as if I were not even there.
"Hey, check it out! Daisuke's got a date with Cinderella-chan!"
"Oh, no! Say it ain't so, man! She's not with him...he's with
her! He's a lapdog! Gotta be!"
"That's right! Daisuke! Is SHE really your date?"
Daisuke replied somberly, "She's my date."
"What's wrong with you? A knockout like that and you're
complaining? Man, I'd be caroling from the housetops!"
Daisuke turned his head to one side and hissed, "She likes girls,
understand? I take her to the park and she wants to watch other
chicks! Is that right? Am I in hell?"
"Oh, man, a lesbo! What a challenge!"
"He's right! A groovy chick like her needs some lovin' to see
the proper path! You wanta tag team?"
"Never mind," said Daisuke, aware of the growing swarm of guys
around his 'date'. "I'm gonna take her home. It's getting
late."
"You are so noble. Is it true...that she disappears at
midnight?"
"I dunno," Daisuke stopped to think, and he brightened, able to
focus on only one thing at a time. "Let's watch and see!"
"Hey, Cin-chan!" cried someone, "Wanna autograph my tongue?"
"I don't want to wait around. Let's go," I said to my 'date'.
Daisuke examined his depleted wallet and agreed. I was beginning
to feel sorry for him. He would have spent his entire savings,
beggared himself, even agreed to do chores to help pay for my
entertainment, and I was tricking him. I had seen a new side of
him that night. He was _scared_ around girls.
[Serves him right,] I thought. [But, I'm gonna owe him when this
is over. When. Oh, Kami, I hope it will be over, someday soon!]
TENDO HOUSE:
"Forgive me, Saotome, I have something to do. No time for a
match, right now," said Soun.
"Just as well," replied Genma. "I have some serious thinking to
do, myself." With that, he splashed into a panda and was soon
snoring beneath a tree near the koi pond.
"Where's Father?" Kasumi asked later.
"Out. I think he's upset for some reason," replied Nabiki. "He
has been mooning around all day."
"He keeps looking at our old family picture," Akane added.
"Oh, then he will be okay," Kasumi returned to the salad.
Nabiki exchanged glances with Akane, as if to say, 'How did she
decide that?'
James and the Bluejay
http://www.wanderway.com