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A Tale of Two Dragons
subject: [Star Ocean] [Self-insert]
(Or, are those two dragons sticking out of your back, or are you just happy to see me?)
A work of fiction by Trodamus (Trodamus@yahoo.com)
In cooperation with Dark Infinity productions (jollygerman@yahoo.com)
Star Ocean is mine. I paid a whole 45 bucks for it at EB.
Author's notes:.........
Chapter one: The union contract
"Dammit! I'm not even supposed to be here today!" I grumbled to myself, quoting a notable View
Askew production. Let me tell you, the last thing you should do when you work at Osco
is let them call you in on a Friday night, for which there is a simple reason: everyone else
called off, and they are down right desperate to have anyone work.
So I came in, figuring it would help smooth over the "Miracle Grow" incident. Not a very
smart idea, let me tell you. I now am wasting my once only night off at work, overloaded to
a fine point, and to top things off, I won't make it outta here on time.
The Bastard. Jim Smith, I mean. This guy is the worst shit to hit my fan, if my name aint Thomas
Dohm. Damn guy *hovers* around, checking over my work like I'm a newbie or something like that.
Not to mention that customers go to him about inane shit to complain about me.
Later in the night, I had to do a rather embarrassing task: fill the Douche on the shelf. Now,
if you do not know what that is, just let me tell you that it is very embarrassing and its for
women, okay? Embarrassing for them, and for me as well when I gotta stock the stuff. So this
lady approaches me, and is about to ask me a question right? Then she sees what I am doing.
She looks young, 'bout sixteen, and vaguely Asian at that. She had short hair, and is wearing
a yellow blouse and skirt combo. A raging blue battle aura flames up for a moment.
"PERVERT!!!!!!" Her scream causes me to get the buisness end of a mallet right in the face. I
flatten out on the floor, one box of the stuff still in my hand. She runs off to big ol' Jim
Smith, while I count the birdies flying around my head.
"Laying down on the job, eh TD? That is really unproffesional of you. Someday you'll need my
recommendation from this place, and what am I gonna tell them? 'Oh, yeah, he likes to sleep in
the middle of the aisle? Isn't that wierd, TD? How they spell aisle? Why all those letters and
no sound?" At this point I am wondering what I did in a past life to deserve this.
Nah, demons are usually somewhat smart. I see his gaze go towards the box of feminine
hygenery in my hand.
"Oh, I see how it is, eh Tom? Like lookin' at the pictures of the pretty ladies, is that it? Boy,
does that bring me back. I have been caught my hand in the cookie jar of young supple ladies,
myself. Maybe a bit too young.... but lets just say that story ended with the word "acquittal."
Back to work now, ya hear?"
Lousy jerk
"What was that?"
"Uh, wait, I said that out loud? I'm-"
"No, that sound in the parking lot. Go check it out, make sure one of our faithful customers
isn't getting a JS."
"JS, sir?" I asked of this unusual reference to his name.
"How did you know what I call it when I sneak up from behind and... nevermind. Just go
and check outside."
So now, I wander out to the parking lot, to check what the commotion is all about. I open
the door and am assaulted by the fresh night air, only a bit cooler than it was this afternoon.
The Jewl-Osco parking lot isn't very large as far as parking lots go, and is reasonably
well-lit. Scattered sporadically throughout the lot are the few remaining cars of associates
and customers.
I cautiously look around, hoping for a sign that says "Disturbance right here, sir." I did,
however, get the next best thing, which was a DID (damsel in distress) running right up to me,
tears in her eyes and visibly shaking. She goes up to me, tries to speak, but ends up pointing
to where a couple of lights are, and a strange glow is emminating from an unseen source.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Strange glow, huh? Maybe thats it....
I direct the distressed young lady to the store, hoping Jim can console her. Reaching for my
keys, I prepare myself to attack whatever may be out there. Now, let me tell you, I am no
laughing matter when it comes to physical stature. Kinda bulky, and sporting a minimal spare-
tire, I am exceptionally stronger than most would give me credit for. That, added to the
fact that I thought I knew martial arts from the volumes of manga and fanfiction I've read about
Ranma made me the most dangerous fool in Tinely Park that night. I head off to the area in
question, which happens to be out of sight behind a large glass-worker's van. As I approach,
the light behind it fades, and soon enough, its back to being a normal night out.
Finally getting to the other side of the van, I spot an odditty of sorts: two withered looking
reptiles, vaguely eel-ish in appearence. Crouching down, I place a hand on the left one, and
am surprised at how warm the supposedly dead body is. Pulling my hand away, I see it has some
sort of red residue on it, still eminating warmth. Touching the other one, I am again thoroughly
surprised, this time since the creature is cold, far colder than anything shuffled loose this
mortal coil should be. My hand is stained a sort of purple now, since the two substances have
mixed.
*hrrrshhhhhhhh* A sound echoes from behind me, causing me to whirl around, at once grabbing my
weapon, the keys to a '91 Ford van, as well as cursing myself as to get so caught up in what
is obviously just some roadkill. At the time, I was too startled to have noticed that the sound
echoed inside of my own head, not from an outside sound source.
I gape at the astounding lack of anything to cause such a noise. Damn! The one time I might
actually get to play hero in my life, and I get jerked-around by spooky sound-effects from
Beyond the screen! Suddenly, I am shoved, quite violently, to the ground, instantly quenching
my desire to taste parking-lot. I glance behind me just in time to see two spirits, one red,
the other blue, dive into my back, causing me no small amount of discomfort.
*I am so dead...* I think to myself, and then, nothing. Not nothing-ness, but no more pain,
nothing else from the... things I just saw. Rubbing my head, I stand up, and feel something
brush by my shoulder. Whirling around, I catch a sight of the blue lizard, but it escapes
my field of vision at the last moment. Twisting again, I fail to see the beast. Whats going on
here?
*Would you stop doing that, I already have a migrane from the transfer, and I don't need my new
host doing the hokey-pokey while I try to clear my head,* Says fiery voice, somehow, from
inside my head.
*Indeed, that course of action seems highly inappropriate and downright silly, so please abstain
from future "hokey-pokeys," says a calm, logical voice, once again, from inside my head.
I crane my neck, and am able to see two large lizards, similar to the ones from before, but
much larger and livlier. I reach back with my hands, and am able to tell that I have two
seperate entities growing out of my back.
I did what any red-blooded American does when faced with something like this.
I fainted.
Explanation
Having played Star Ocean: Second Story for a bit, and mulling over whether or not to consider
it a good game and why, I decided that the best character in it was Ashton. Why, you might ask?
Well, everyone else is just so... normal, even for an RPG menagerie (maybe not Precis). I feel
that characters should have outstanding differences in an RPG, at least to a point. ST:2S
only did this a bit, and was a bit slow on the development of its characters. Another game
that pisses me off like that is FF8: They all have the same job, same upbringing, etc!
That is what made FF7 so great, from Barret to Cait Sith, they all had distinct personalities
and backstories, while in FF8, they were all the same. Now, in ST:2S, Ashton sets himself apart
with Gyoro and Ururun, but the writers leave him with only a barrel joke during the PEs!
So, not wanting to just write a fic where they must save the world again, or where A falls for
B, I wanted to write myself into the universe.
So its a self-insertion. Sue me.
However, I would like to think that bringing it to the "real" world would make it better.
Any work of fiction (FF, Ranma, Tenchi) is so much cooler when they must react with real life
characters and events... so here I am, with two dragons growing out of my back.
I picture Gyoro(red) as hot-headed and emotional, with fire as his magical element.
I picture Ururun(blue) as calm and logical, with water/ice as his elements.
As for the cameo, if you don't know what it is, you probably aren't reading this.
As for my boss, no he is not like that, but you would still hate him if you met him. Should
anyone from Osco try to sue me for this, I can sue right back!! I got dirt on ya!!
As for the perspective(1st person) I apologize for going in and out of "diary" mode and
"experiencing it now" mode. I may switch to 3rd person limited(Uses he/she, but only focuses
on one character) or omniscent. Tell me which you prefer! E-Mail me!
Exceptionally witty responses, compliments or flames, will be posted on the next chapter! Cool!