Disclaimer at end.
Tubabuhda (Some-what) Unlimited
Presents a KG4FCA production:
Mallet-ious Intent
A 2-Pager, No-Brainer
The warm sun shone upon Kasumi's shoulders as she walked home from her
daily grocery shopping. She had stopped by Dr. Tofu's clinic intending to
return a book she had borrowed, but ended up spending an hour having tea.
"Oh my…" As she turned the corner, there lay an unconscious Ranma firmly
embedded in the sidewalk with two very large lumps protruding from the top of
his head.
Kasumi rushed over to help him up. As she gently rolled Ranma over onto
his back, she could see that his lips were moving. All she could make out as
she leaned down to listen was "Got to stop them…. Disaster imminent… must
run away…. NO, NOT THE HAMMERS!!!!!!!" With this last statement, Ranma
jumped out of the crater he had been laying in and ran towards the Tendo
Training Hall.
Kasumi stood and continued her way home, completely unfazed by Ranma's
dramatics. As she neared the front gates to her home, Ranma flew over the
fence accompanied by Akane's notorious "Ranma, you JERK!"
At that time, Genma and Soun came sneaking through the front gates, packs
on their backs and very frightened looks on thier faces. Seeing Kasumi just
a few steps away, both men fell to their knees weeping and wailing in joy.
"Thank the heavens, Kasumi's home" was the most prevalent phrase from her
father, and "please, stop Akane, they'll kill us all" was the mantra given by
Genma.
Kasumi smiled sweetly at the two martial artists, steeped around their
sob wracked bodies, and walked up to the front door of the house.
* Whump-splat * Whump-splat *
"What a curious sound" mused Kasumi as she removed her shoes.
* Whump-splat * Whump-splat *
"Kasumi, good your home." Nabiki was beside her sister quickly putting
her shoes on. "Listen, we had this comedian from America show up today at
school, and he saw Akane use her mallet on Kuno. He told Akane he'd teach
her how to cook. They're in the kitchen right now. I'll be back in a while,
I've got a meeting with Kuno: more pictures of his 'pigtailed goddess'"
* Whump-splat * Whump-splat *
Kasumi looked at her little sister. "I thought you said you'd quit
selling pictures to Kuno after he tried to sneak that counterfeit bill past
you the last time?"
* Whump-splat * Whump-splat *
"Well, I wouldn't have too if we weren't going to have to do so many
repairs." With that, Nabiki strolled out the front doors, stopping for a
second to shake her head in shame: Soun and P-Genma were still in the front
gates, but had begun to beg for food.
* Whump-splat * Whump-SPLAT *
Kasumi stood in the kitchen door, covered in an odd mixture of
watermelon, spaghetti, soy sauce, starch, whipped cream, shrimp and a few
other unidentifiable squashed items.
"Oh, hi Kasumi!" a very cheerful, mallet-weilding Akane beamed at her
older sister. She pointed towards a man with shaggy long brown hair, a
shaggy mustache, goggles and a big wooden mallet. "I'd like you to meet my
new cooking teacher from America, Mr. Gahlager!"
End (Thank Goodness!)
10-22-00
Disclaimer:
This was meant to be a bad pun: please don't flame me for my whimsy!
Naturally, all characters in this work belong to someone other than me, I'm
just messing with them for a cheap laugh! Characters from Ranma 1/2 are
property of Takihashi Rumiko, Gahlager is real, but I don't know who his
comedy and mallet are copyrighted through.