"Tis a bitter sweet moment that hath hence forth come to me
delete "hence forth"
this very day." Kuno started as he stepped out from around his
favorite tree. "For this day, I shall end your enslavement of
Akane and the pig-tailed girl finally freeing them from your ill
comma after "girl"
begotten ways," Kuno boasted.
What's the bitter part?
"Be forewarned, Dark Sorcerer, I have come to learn the
secret that binds your magic."
comma splice
From a distance, a figure watched as the fight progressed.
Yuota wasn't sure why he told Kuno to try shouting his sisters
shouting Hiromi's name
to his full speed or strength. 'Probably always practiced that
alone anyway.' Ranma considered as he could.
Makes no sense.
"I know your kind, and your all no good!"
you're all no good!
"Fine, then we don't have a problem do we!" Yuota shouted,
getting really nervous seeing Ranma big father staring at him in
a disapproving manner.
Ranma's
"I have awaited this day for 6 years. Will you help me or
not."
question mark
"He denied any feeling for my sister too, shortly before."
he trailed off.
shortly before..." He trailed off.
"Come on guys," Yuota called as he grabbed his coat from the
closet. "We need to go pay a visit to the local low lifes."
to the local low-life's
"They where torturing cats. Over thirty in all. Most had
died from starvation of the cold before the animal shelter could
were torturing cats.
or the cold
(And it isn't very likely that cats would die of the cold unless it
was parka weather.)
"It is very late, can this wait until morning." Kasumi
Comma splice. Missing question mark.
"This can't wait. I have to know what happened when he
trained Ranma in the Cat fist."
Cat Fist
"This is Yuota." Genma only nodded his acknowledgement.
'What is it with Saotome's and names' Nabiki thought. "Yuota
Saotomes
"How .," Genma felt his throat dry up. "How is your sister."
His voice almost bounce up two octaves.
"How-"
girl, there was some hope. But Ranma was hard headed and needed
some pushing to see things the way they had to be.
hard-headed
already been engaged to one of Tendou's daughters, so he could
really take her along anyway. Besides the road is no place for a
"couldn't"
"Ranma had become weak." He said at least. His eyes focusing
weak," he said at last, his eyes focusing
on events that he had truly regretted, even as he made the same
mistakes over and over.
our head for the winter, even if the walls where drafty." He had
were drafty
topless bar. And if his dear sweet wife ever found out.
found out-
Akane couldn't decide weither to be moved by such a thing,
or to go ballistic. He certainly didn't care that much about her!
whether
"That doesn't make since!" Yuota said shaking his head.
sense
Genma sighed. "You don't understand. It wasn't suppose to
supposed
"I was acting like a cat." Ranma said incredulously. Looking
over at his father, looking for some explanation.
Remember, Ranma is afraid of cats.
Hiromi, however, was not a marital artist, and thus, in that
"martial"
"That's right. In the next town, we went to. That's where we
meat her," Genma answered while pulling his gi back on, after
Meat her? Now that IS dark.
years. As she force a whole big enough to jump through Nabiki
called out.
forced a hole
I don't particularly like the attempt to go back to life as usual at
the end of the story.