From: "Ragun Paul Moody" <Kichigai@tds.net>
$Oh, hey cool! A GSC fanfic! And it's a good one! That deserves special
attention!
Thank you. :-)
All comments my opinon, heavy snippage throughout. Feel free to take
offense, but keep in mind it's all in jest.
You don't know me well enough to offend. :-)
Back in the Saddle
<snip>
$Ah, Ducati. Proof that neither the Americans nor the Japanese know what
the hell they're doing with motorcycles. And yes, 200 is realistic. For
one rider. Adding a passenger to _any_ motorcycle reduces the maximum
speed
considerably.
I do realizea that - but the manga typically has Rally driving 120+ on
American roads. If Sonoda can stretch the boundaries of realistic speed,
then so can I! LOL
Rally grinned and shifted her grip. ^�You bet! Ride ^�em Cowboy!^�
$Not till the lemon scene at the end.
That's one of them, yes. LOL
<snip>
^�Exactly.^� Rally locked her feet under the chair and pushed back to lean
against the wall. She had changed into a crop top and shorts, but she
$Not panties? Aww, cutting back on the fanservice, are we?
Yes. My heart's just not in it, really...I find it, well, rather
embarrassing. I mean, what loser ass 40-year old virgin really
*likes*
fanservice?
*g*
<snip>
^�Hey darlin^�. I thought it was time to see your spread.^� She looked
$Hey, darlin'. I know, I know, it's not how it's said, I just call them
as
the damn english teachers forced me to.
That's the third, you missed one. LOL
$She's drunk enough to giggle, but she's still driving? Bad call.
Rally does LOTS of things I wouldn't suggest...
$Paper? Odd. I'm familiar with the plastic glock 9s you can find
occasionally, they'll fire a few rounds if you wait long enough for the
barrel to cool before fireing again. But paper? Okay...
Call it a cheesy plot complication. :-)
$Whether or not Rally likes it or not remains to be seen.
<rim shot>
$Ah. American beer. I see.
"Drinking American beer is like making love in a canoe. It's fucking close
to water." A real quite from a train station in Bath, England. I laughed for
hours.
As it happens, I find beer revolting...all of it.
$_Except_! when that time could involve shooting and presonal risk.
Anyone that's been alive as long as CB would know that. I've got to
disagree, here, even considering the loss of blood.
Picky bastard, aren't you? LOL
$Boy, Cowboy must have really worked her over last night.
Didn't, that's the problem. I look like that too, when my wife...well...
forget that. LOL
$Rally tied up in a ribbon. Yeah, I bet she would be interested.
I bet. :-)
^�Yea!^� May enthused. She leaned forward and put her arms around Ken^�s
$Yeah! (I think, you may have ment that.)
Um no..."yeah" is usually pronounced with the long vowel - the schwa "e",
whereas "yea" is usually pronounced "yay:
$Keaton: I knew it, I'm surrounded by assholes...
You bet.
$I thought she didn't like sausage?
<rim shot> That one was plain bad.
$Heh. Cute. Long: I've only got one bullet left, and it's got your name
on it.
Well, one has to do SOMETHING when filling in gigantic plot holes!
$But she's a- nevermind.
Don't be a loser...girls get hard too. I'll give you a hint - in more than
one place. :-)
$Her bellybutton?
Uh, no...
It was nothing like a good day at the range. There was no way that this
sensation could be replicated.
$Although there _is_ a thriving industry that trys...
Yes, that would be a Minnie May story, wouldn't it? LOL
Panting with raw desire, she kept Cowboy
where she was until she was sated.
$Greedy ain't she.
And why not?
$Damn, mine would have too! Did you know that it's _highly_ illegal to
mail a gun around?
Yes. Swords too, but it's done.
$But not with two people! ...sorry. I get carried away.
I understand entirely...but it stays for purposes of cheesy storyline. :-)
It is, by all accounts, *the* bike to die on.
;-)
$Yeah. Twitch the throttle and slam into a wall at mach three.
LMAO! That's about right. :-)
$Many pistols have that capability. Not all, but many.
My mistake - the site I was using for my gun info (and, I believe, the GSC
manga,) made it seem like an exclusivity. I will change that. Thanks.
Yes, I am perfectly aware that there are HUGE GAPING plot holes...there
are in the manga too. I stand on precedent. :-)
$Yeah, I quite liked this. It read much like the manga and anime did.
Thanks you! That's the highest compliment I could receive. I was frustrated
that most of the GSC fic...and ALL the lemons read so badly, so OOC, as if
they had never read one issue or seen an episode.
$Hear hear! Whooo! And that, folks, its what I look for when I want to
read a lemon. Particularly yuri. Without setup, it just doesn't work.
Writing is a lot like sex. Well, no, not really, but I'm making a metaphor
here so leave me alone.
No actually, you're right. At least, IMHO.
Ahem. Without adequate, quality foreplay, the
climax can really suck. In fact, it's the foreplay I really like.
Ditto.
Speaking
of which, more of that could be shown here, (The lemon foreplay, not the
setup.) but overall I have no complaints.
I agree - I got tired of writing. :-)
In fact, I thank god that this
was of such high quality. I don't think I could have handled that many k
of
constant errors to correct. Now, I know I missed one, but I couldn't find
it the second go around. Hope this helps, and I'd be happy to see some
other work too.
Thanks again, for all your time and comments!
Thanks for the entertainment.
It's my great pleasure. :-)
Cheers,
Erica
AniLesboCon 2001 - "For real women who like their women...animated."
http://www.shoujoai.com/~anilesbocon
"World Shaking" Fanfic -
http://www.worldshaking.net
The Fanfic Revolution -
http://come.to/hauthor
Because fanfic does not have to suck
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