To reply, post publically or e-mail the author at hansholm@bredband.net
Enjoy!

The FFML Refugee List 

This has been described by one previous reader as
"thr most confusing and disturbing thing I have read in a while."

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; Rumiko Takahashi and co
does. I'm not making any money off this either.

THE REASON
 A Ranma fanfic (spamfic) by Hans Holm

"Do you want anything, son-in-law?", Cologne said. "Or did you just 
come here to glare at me?"
"Uh...Some kind of explanation would be nice...", Ranma began.
"Please, continue."
"I know you never liked Mousse, but...He died saving the Amazons!
You could at least acknowledge that he died a hero! But you refuse 
him even the least kind of burial rites!"
"You don't have a body."
"THERE IS NO BODY!"
"There is an old rule: Never assume someone's dead until you've
seen the body."
"But...we all saw him. One moment he was there, then a flash of light
and he was gone."
"Sigh. Come with me, son-in-law. I'll show you something, but I want 
an oath of silence on your part. You'll never tell anybody this. OK?"
"...OK."

She lead him into one of the cluttered backrooms.
"I need your help now. The thing I want to show you is in a small box,
somewhere behind all these boxes. Get them out of the way."
A few minutes later Cologne was opening the box in question. Ranma
couldn't help thinking that she seemed to have worked much to hard 
on making sure that box was kept shut. Especially since it only 
contained old photos.
"This one", Cologne said, handing him one of them.

It was a very old-looking photo of a young Chinese couple. The
girl looked vaguely familiar, and the way she was glomping onto the 
boy seemed very familiar...And the boy was _very_ familiar, even
without his glasses and robe.

"What?...How?..."
"I don't know. A few weeks after Happosai left, I found...the boy in 
the photo, unconscious and injured, near Jyusenkyo. I...We..."
"Let me guess. You nursed him back to health and fell in love."
"No need to be sarcastic. I tried every trick in the book to get him to
stay, but a few months after recovering he disappeared as suddenly as
he had appeared..."
"So all this time you've been punishing Mousse for dumping you."
"Well...I have a very good reason for keeping him from Shampoo."
"Jealo...Oh no! They're not...You didn't...That's gross!"
"What's gross about it. I didn't look like this when I was nineteen. 
Ask Happosai. I did say I used _every_ trick in the book."
"But...but...but..."
"If it's any relief to you, I'm not totally sure it was the Mousse you 
know. For one thing, he didn't turn into a duck."
"What do you mean 'the Mousse you know'? And what has this to do
with not giving him any burial rites?"
"Ever heard of something called alternate realities? My Mousse was
very similar to the one you know but not identical. It could because he
was older or because he was a different Mousse..."
"My head hurts..."
"And then there's his disappearance...after he recovered we spent a 
lot of time looking for an item he had lost near where I found him.
A few days after we found it, he said farewell and disappeared in a
flash of light that looked a lot like the one you talked about earlier."
"Uh...You've completely lost me now."
"I'm saying that it is possible that Mousse, or even several different
Mousses, is jumping between dimensions and realities trying to find
his way back here."
"Sounds more like a science fiction series to me. So your not going to
allow him any burial rites because you think he'll reappear. And he's 
actually Shampoo's great-grandfather."
"Yes."
"I think I'll go lie down now. My head hurts."
"Remember, you're sworn to silence."

The End.

Well...this was an elaboration on one of the possible reasons for
"Why do the Amazons keep Mousse around?"
I have a longer list of possible reasons, but I'm not sure if that's the kind
of thing that should be posted here (it is a, this far, rather unsuccessful
attempt to start a discussion on the matter). It has been posted elsewhere, though.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
                     desaix@sysnet.net
Sir Desaix, member # 116 of the Knights of the True Fiancee           
              anime  fanfics available at 
  http://www.geocities.com/zednik.geo/fanfics.htm

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