Now that really rough draft of the chapter is finally complete (currently
120k, which probably means about 130K for a release, with the way I revise),
I finally have a chance to respond to some of the responses the teaser
generated.

Since people have been prodding me lately, I shall once again prove this
isn't dead yet. Mind you, this is just the teaser for the next chapter:

    Let's see if I can't be productive today...

You're always productive in my book. Unforunately JK, Mia, you, the Wildes,
and others have recently released stuff, which means the backlog has grown
impressively once again. *Grumble Grumble* Had it down to 210 messages about
3 weeks ago, and now its creeped back up to over 300.

Or R+C books at:
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org

And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at
http://s5.sexshare.com/~angcobra/dbsommer.html

    That's right, folks! DB Sommer Lite(TM)! Coming soon to a store near
you! ;)

I get around. Besides, I have a bad tendeny to have host sites need to
change their addresses from time to time. Not their fault, just that it pays
to have the stuff stored in one spot. People tend to let you know when your
site is down, and they're never particularly happy about that. :)

Mopping the sweat from her brow with a hand-embroidered silk

handkerchief,

Kodachi Kunou gave a satisfied smirk at her handiwork. Finally, it was
finished. It might have taken the better part of the last two days, but

the

results were what she had desired. The Iron Rose Mark II armor could now

fit

into the attach� case she had especially designed for it. True, the case

was

a bit large, actually it was three times the size of a normal attach�

case,

but it was necessary. The armor was just too bulky to fit in something
smaller, even with it having been redesigned to be collapsible, as it was
now.

    I trust all the repetition of 'hand' is intentional? :p

Nope. Cut the first 'hand-embroided' one to just embroidered.

    Kodachi: Just you wait, you red-haired hussy, Shiiko will be mine!
No, wait... wrong series.

True. Although you never know when an Ako character might be popping up.

The need to carry the armor around at all times was now a necessary evil.
Recent events, combined with what she had recently learned about the

stock

situation concerning Kunou Industries, clearly indicated that someone was
targeting her family's business for a takeover of the most hostile kind.

    Second line, repetition of 'recent'.

Got it.

It was also obvious that whoever was moving in for the takeover was

probably

behind the disappearances of both her father and brother. Neither would

have

parted with the company willingly anymore than Kodachi would have. With

any

of them at the helm, and with their controlling stock, a takeover would

be

nearly impossible. Without them, it would go smoothlessly and save the
person trying to buy the company billions of yen, at least. That was more
than enough motive for any ruthless person or corporation to have the

only

potential stumbling block eliminated, or at least try to eliminate them.

    Smoothlessly? You mean seamlessly? Flawlessly? I'm not sure that
flows...

Meant smoothly, actually.

outstanding debts and his bank account had the expected amount of money

in

it. There was no reason for him to try to kill her. Once the man had been
interrogated, it became obvious his mental condition was similar to

Ohama's.

He had fallen victim to some sort of brainwashing as well. And no leads

had

turned up on that clue to date either.

    Last sentence, commage? Not sure...

Probably. I'm going to add it.

close at hand. And the only way to do that was to conceal it. Enter her

new

attach� case. She was going to show it off to the world. Once people

became

used to her always walking around with it like it was surgically attached

to

her, no one would be suspicious that she and the Iron Rose were the same.

It

was a great plan.

    Except the entire, "taking off all her clothes and donning the armor
in public" thing, but she thought she could get used to that pretty
quickly...

Silly. That's what public phone booths are for: quick costume changes.

She closed the lid on the case. A mental note was made to make the helmet

a

little more collapsible, since she had to force the top shut. But now it
looked fine, except the large size of the case. She grabbed the handle

and

pulled it off the table it was resting on...

    Have you ever read 'Your Half'?

Nope. Who wrote it?

...And promptly screamed in pain as the case landed squarely on her foot,
the weight of the attach� being far too much for her to carry around.

    Thought so.

Same joke in there, eh?

As she hopped on one foot while trying to hold the other at the same

time,

Kodachi decided that was the final straw. She silently vowed she was
streamlining the armor the first decent chance she got, the additional

armor

the current version had be damned. In the meantime, she was going to have

to

modify the attach� case again. Maybe some wheels added to the bottom and

a

pull cord...

    Or better yet, someone to carry it around for her...

So, you think she needs in equivalent of Jim Rhodes or 'Happy' Hogan,' eh?
Perhaps Sasuke, as a future War Machine...

Nah. Even I'm not that evil. :)

    Repetition of armor? Additional defences, protection, shielding, etc?

Not sure what you mean. You think I need to add those in?

Daredevil craned his neck back to stare at this new impending menace that
was threatening the city. From the waist upwards, this strange newcomer

was

an imposing sight. Midnight blue armor covered his body like a medieval
knight hell-bent on some glorious crusade. The faceplate was not meant to

be

intimidating, with its flat surface and plain features, but that

unadorned

look was unsettling in some way to the onlookers, perhaps because it

lacked

character of any kind. The musculature of the armor wasn't exaggerated,

but

still appeared imposing due to its size and the obvious thickness. All
things considered, it was an impressive appearance that belayed a

mysterious

power that implied this man might be someone to be reckoned with.

    First and second instances of 'this' -- 'the' ? Not sure.

I think it's okay as is. Sounds all right to me, anyway.

    "God, I wish he would wear pants."

Save for the fact his legs were stilts.

    Dang. Close, though. :p

Yep. :)

"The Stilt Man!"

    That sounds... usefull. I guess.

No. It's silly. One of the reasons he never made it far out of DD's book
save a few instances in the 70's when the total number of villains was
lower.

has frustrated me to the point that I have decided to embark on a life of
crime! Using my genius in the field of hydraulics, I devised these

massive

legs to enable me to get really tall and... hold on! I'm getting tired of
shouting!" The Stilt Man's hydraulic legs, which looked pretty much like

two

plain, thick columns with nothing in the way of feet, retracted downward

so

that he was only fifteen feet high instead of the previous ninety.

    Tripping could be bad, yes.

The legs did tend to be wide and powerful enough that he rarely fell, at
least later on. Got his first appearance recently and will read that. It's
probably the way DD defeated him the first time.

While his arms were out of sight behind his back, Daredevil flicked his
wrist and a crowbar fell from out of his voluminous robes and into his
hands. He made it appear he was listening with rapt attention while he

used

his body to shield the crowbar from view. He softly played it along the
ground until it caught in the opening he had spotted with his radar

sense.

"So, what you're telling me is, your sole superpower is the ability to

look

stupid on a pair of adjustable stilts."

    He must have very long arms.

No. The crowbar is long.

even get an attractive female thief with a cat motif that feels

helplessly

drawn to them even while she's in the middle of fighting them. That's

what I

want, but what do I get? Weenie race car drivers. Men in frog costumes

with

springs in their feet that have the ability to *gasp* jump. Overweight

guys

that have bad hair and can glide. An owl is not an intimidating creature

to

anything but a mouse, godamnit!"

    Comma before the *gasp* ?

Should there be? He's is saying 'gasp' to indicate how unintimdating the
ability to jump is. Perhaps I should get rid of the asteriks or something.
Want to make sure the effect is right.

Stilt Man's voice took on a sinister bent. At least as sinister as he

could

manage with two giant pylons as his legs. "That's easy. All I have to do

is

step on you with one of these 'stupid' hydraulic legs, which can press

ten

tons under optimal conditions. And these conditions are very optimal,
Darepancake" Stilt Man raised his foot and aimed it right at Daredevil's
stationary form, humming 'London Bridge is Falling Down' as it descended
towards his foe.

    Missing punctuation after 'Darepancake'.

Got it.

    Also, that ten tons of hydrualic force only works if Stilt Boy
weighs more than ten tons. That pressure's going to send him _up_, not
his target _down_. Maybe he's not as much of a hydraulic genius as he
thinks. :p

Hmm. He never had that problem before. Must be comic book physics in action.
:)

"Just like I knew you would," Daredevil sighed as he waited until the

last

moment to nimbly leap to the side. As he jumped, he pulled the crowbar
upward and yanked off the manhole cover he had been standing on like a

pop

top to a bottle of beer.

    Repetition of 'as'?

Cut the first.

Stilt Man had only an instant to allow the horror of what had just

happened

to wash over him as he watched his right leg disappear down the hole.

There

was no time to extend the errant limb to the bottom as his leg fell into

the

equivalent of a five foot gopher hole on a man not wearing stilts. His
downward motion was only arrested by his body hitting the pavement at the
edge of the hole. Or, to be more specific, his crotch hitting the

pavement

at the edge of the hole.

    Man. Sucks to be him.

Oui. I imagine all of the cool super villains used to beat him up when he
was in jail.

"Needed... more... armor... there," Stilt Man squeaked out as he remained
exactly where he was, tears streaming from his eyes.

    Needed or need? Wait.

    No, don't answer that. Ow. >_<

Heh.

Daredevil walked up to his opponent, twirling something that looked like

it

was from a UFO Catcher machine. "Give up, or do I show you the terrors of

my

new weapon, the 'testicular claw'?"

    Is 'UFO Catcher' a name brand? I always thought it was just the type
of machine...

I think you're right. I'm not going to capitalize catcher.

device of unimaginable horror. Superheroeing was easy. It was like a
courtroom. Have of the fight was won on actual ability, and the other

half

was won on delivering a good performance.

    Have -- half

Right.

As I said, this was just the teaser. Expect the real meat of the chapter

to

start after these two bits. Will post the rest once I get the time to

finish

it. Ideally that will be sometime later in the week, but we shall see.

    Yes. Yes we will, won't we? :p

Hehehehe. And we see that indeed, my prediction was horribly off. Will
probaby be next week I post the first half, depending on when the couple of
prereaders I have are done looking it over. Second half will hopefully not
be long after that.

BTW: The sad things is, Daredevil's early foes did tend to be
'unforgettables' like Leap Frog, Stilt Man, and the infamous original
'Hooters' of crime the Owl and his flunkies. And don't ask me about the
'Masked Matador' with his ability to use a red cape to make charging

people

miss him. ^_^

    I only remember one or two Daredevil comics, actually, and the one I
remember most clearly involved something about vietnam... which tells
you how clearly I remember it. -_-

I'm a Marvel freak. Don't remember everything, but I remember enough.

Thanks for the comments and the grammar tips.. Hope you enjoy the rest when
it comes out.

D.B. Sommer




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