Brian Randall wrote:

    Sorry about taking so long to get to you on this -- was going to
take care of it yesterday, but something happened.

No prob. Been a bad week for lots of people for obvious reasons.

Avenging
Chapter 7
Honey, I Shrunk Kasumi

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    Snipped teaser stuff, since I C&Ced it already. :p

I remember it well.

"Wow, this place is something else." Kyosuke Kasuga whistled in awe, as

his

eyes took in every piece of fantastic equipment that filled the
cathedral-sized chamber of the secret sub-level of the local branch of
Hydra's headquarters they had been ordered to go to.

    That is a lot of sentence.

    A lot of exposition, too... maybe break that into two sentences?

Broke it at awe. Could porbably rework it better, but nothing is coming to
mind at the moment.

such things in their agents. Pocket protectors simply weren't

intimidating.

And besides, everyone knew all the nerds joined the Advanced Idea

Mechanics.

Hydra agents were supposed to be better than that. They were strong. They
were dangerous. They could pick up chicks.

    Some days.

    If it was dark.

    And said 'chicks' were drunk.

Heh. True. It's sort of one of the lies men tell themselves.

attachment. Both uniforms marked them as part of the 'super agent' branch

of

Hydra, which everyone just called the 'Super Villain Squad.'

    I feel that this is the perfect setup for a one-liner, but whatever
that one-liner is, it escapes me. Dang.

No worries. You can't hit them all. :)

in an iron grip. He supposed it was one of the advantages of being the

boss

of your own terrorist organization, you could tele-commute whenever you

felt

like it.

    Repetition of mysterious is intentional?

Nope. Got rid of the second.

it was better than some of the other choices. You should have seen what

some

of those idiots in the promotions section came up with. There were ones

like

Headlok, Mind-Wave, Think Tank, and the absolute worst, Brain Guy. I

think

Mentallo was the least bad of the choices. It's not too bad." Kyosuke
shrugged.

    No quotation around the other names?

Didn't think I needed it.

"The Fixer! Can you believe that? I sound like a cheap television repair
man. It is a totally inappropriate name for field operations. I mean,

what's

someone going to do if I go charging in and shouting, 'You'd better give

up,

or the Fixer's going to fix you'? Please, they'll think I'm there to

neuter

their pets."

    Actually, it's not that bad...

    They could have called him something much worse.

    Mr. Gizmo, for example. :p

Heh. Gizmo was the name of a tech oriented dwarf in the Fearsome Five, but
that was DC, and you know how they are. :)

equipment doing all sorts of unpleasant things with a wide array of

advanced

weapons to the good guys."

    Kyosuke: But... you can't actually _do_ anything with that
equipment, can you?

    Hiroshi: Well, no, actually...

Oh, he can do  quite a bit with it actually. You'll see in the second half
of the chapter.

"High level telepath. I can read minds, and attack people with mental
blasts. I have telekinesis as well, but I don't use it much. It gives me

a

splitting headache whenever I use it."

    Hiroshi: Man, high level telepathy must suck if you had to ask me
all the questions that you just did.

    Kyosuke: I hate you...

Nah. It's just that people get real annoyed if you read their mind without
their permission.

"Yes, but it doesn't really help all that much. Besides, super-villains
can't chug aspirin in the middle of fight. Someone could beat me up while

I

was trying to get the goddamn stupid childproof caps off. Usually I just
suffer when I use it and down half a bottle when I get back to base."

    Why change from tylenol to asprin all of the sudden? :p

My bad. All aspirin now.

    And you do know that over-use of asprin can lead to tinninitis
(ringing in the ears when exposed to asprin -- I have it), right?

Didn't know. However he doesn't use it that much.

"I know, I'm not," Hiroshi admitted. "It all goes back to my college

days.

There was this girl there named Marie. She was the most beautiful and

nicest

girl I had ever met. Once she crashed into me, smashing those oh so

perfect

breasts into my face, I fell for her instantly. But I knew she couldn't

feel

the same way about me."

    I've seen this anime...

Boku No Marie/My Dear Marie (now rereleased as Metal Wing Angel or
something) I admit to really liking it myself. Odd considering the story is
a bit cliche and I don't care for the artwork. Execution and characters were
done so well though that it's actually one of my faves. Keep hoping to find
the time to watch it, but I have plenty of new anime to watch at the moment.

with their secretaries behind her back, since they're rich and handsome

and

every good-looking golddigger is gunning for them, just waiting for the
moment when he gets tired of his wife and gets a divorce? Why would she
choose me when she could have all that?" Hiroshi's shoulder slumped in
defeat.

    Hehe...

Sad thing is, it's not that far from the truth.

"No. I pretty much resigned myself to her remaining beyond my reach. So
instead I made a robot version of her. She's identical in every way,

except

her hair color is pink and her breasts are just a touch bigger. Her
personality is a little different, but she's still sweet and caring and
actually likes to talk to me. We even spend quality time doing things
together."

    Heh. In the anime, I thought that the robot had a smaller chest.

Hmm. Could be. I remember one wasn't as big as the other.  What happens when
you haven't seen something in about 3 years.

"It's because I need a lot of money, and quick. I ran out of it while
building Marie. She runs fine, except for the tiny problem with shielding
for her radioactive core."

    Heh.

Just a minor glitch, really.

"She doesn't have any. She leaks radiation like a Russian nuclear power
plant. I can't spend more than five minutes with her, or I'd be glowing

in

the dark."

    Hehe...

Thought it might be a cute line.

Kyosuke's eyes widened. "How did you get a radioactive power core, on

your

own, before you joined Hydra? Did you steal it from a government

facility?"

    Hiroshi: By removing the radioactive elements from common household
smoke-detectors.

    http://www.findarticles.com/m1111/n1782_v297/21281407/p1/article.jhtml

Close.

"No. I got it by scraping off the glow-in-the-dark material on those

watches

Greenpeace handed out while they were on campus protesting environmental
degradation."

"I sense a twisted bit of irony there."

    Heh.

Actually the basis for the idea was from an Old Bloom County strip. One
person actually remembered it, amazingly enough.

that moment. Her name was Madoka. I should have told her how I felt, but

I

was too awestruck to speak, and I didn't want to scare her off with that
kind of wild talk. We had a brief discussion about the number of steps

that

were there, and, after mentally tampering with her mind so she agreed

that

the number I counted was correct, she left. I thought I would never see

her

again."

    KoR. Which I haven't seen. :p

I'm halfway through the series. IMO, it's okay, but dated. You know how it
ends from the first episiode. Tale's as cliche as you can get, and though
the characters are okay, they don't really inspire me either. Same thing
with the episodes, they don't draw me in much. It's enjoyable enough to
watch once, but I'd never rewatch it. Of course, for all my gripes, MI is
one of my favorite anime/mangas, and the stories are similar from a romantic
aspect. Don't ask me why one really works for me and the other is only
so-so. Probably just personal taste.

pools of brown, and I knew there was a good woman worth loving underneath

a

rough exterior. It was true love that had touched my heart. I knew this

was

the one woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with."

    Fate and Destiny: Uh... no, we were busy elsewhere.

    ;)

Capitalization was intentional in light of what you've been writing. ^_^

"The woman I loved with all my heart was a lesbian!" Kyosuke continued

on,

failing to note Hiroshi's speechless state. "That's why I joined Hydra. I
want them to boost my mental powers so I can control everyone on Earth.

Then

I'm going to wipe out the immoral disease of lesbianism by removing it

from

every mind on the planet."

    Well, was sympathetic until that part.

He is a bad guy.

he really thought of someone willing to change his whole life because he
mistakenly hit on a dyke. Hiroshi made a mental note to start wearing

some

kind of psionic shielding, just in case Kyosuke decided he was a lesbian
trapped in a man's body or something and tried wiping his brain out.

    This is giving me very decidedly odd NYJ

New York Jets?

flashbacks. Hiroshi and Bob

could be brothers.

Not sure what NYJ is.

Both youths looked at each other in surprise. Neither had met their

supreme

commander before, but that was not the kind of response either had

expected.

Most Hydra sub-commanders had a tendency to flog those members who did

not

repeat the mantra correctly and enthusiastically.

    The beatings will continue until morale improves.

Yep.

In response to the interruption, the Imperial Hydra flicked a switch. The
gushing became a sporadic dance of pain as Mentallo found the metal floor
plate under his feet suddenly electrified. He continued hopping from one
foot to the next for several seconds until the power was turned off.

    Weeeeeell...

    Cartoon physics, I guess. :p

Oh yes. Comic Book physics allow one to suspend nearly an infinite amount of
disbelief. You're going to have to get used to it here.

you will employ the device in the field. The Fixer will function as your
bodyguard, on the off-hand chance something goes wrong."

    A loser with a giant head? I'm going to _have_ to go back and read
the previous chapters.

MODOK's not seen in previous chapters. This is just a passing reference to
him. Have no intention of introducing him.

Once again the current was turned off. As the pain subsided, Mentallo
decided to keep his mouth shut from now on. He'd just have his new,
technologically oriented friend redesign the thing so it didn't look

quite

so ridiculous, and in the meantime he would mind blank everyone so they
didn't remember they had seen him in it.

    Heh.

One of the advantages to being a telepath.

Again the Imperial Hydra spoke. "I warn you, there is a limit of twenty
square kilometers on the device, so don't get too excited over it. Still,
that should be enough to cover one ward of the Tokyo district. Your

target

will be Nerima."

    Oh, right. _That_'ll work.

Well, here Nerima hasn't been that odd until lately. Now things are going to
get real interesting fast.

"Yeah. And speaking of feet, do you think you can whip me up a set of
insulated boots? I have this bad feeling I'm going to be putting them to
good use."

    At least the fixer gets to do something, though he looks like a much
more non-combat villain than anything else.

As long as he's armed, he's a threat. More versitile than a lot of villains,
and once he joined the T-Bolts as Techno, actually started to win some of
his fights.

needed to cook in the oven for another hour before it was ready. Akane

would

be home by then, and the entire family and guests would dine together.

    Now, wouldn't a good cook time it so that everything finished
cooking at once? :p

    Unless the vegetables are meant to be served cold, in which case I'm
wrong.

Heh. Just needed in excuse to get her out of the house and want to go back
shortly. This was the first thing that came to mind.

dressed in the tuxedo last night. He was a centimeter taller and a good

bit

larger than her. The impressive physique he boasted was one she had seen

on

very few men, older or otherwise, and helped to mask his true age. He

just

didn't appear all that much younger than her, at least physically.

    Kasumi: No... he's not the marriagable type. A torrid affair could
be fun, though.

Sextacular Kasumi might think that perhaps, but her primary complaint about
younger men is that they're too inexperienced. :)

Sensing Kasumi would not be turned from her course of action, Akane

finally

relented and informed her sister that Tofu was in back. As Kasumi left

the

room, Akane got up and retrieved her jacket, schoolbooks, and cane.

Exiting

the building, she knew that as good as her mood had been before, now it

was

just as dark. A feeling made twice as bad since she had been so happy
before.

    Cane?

    I wonder just how much I'm missing here... :p

A lot. You really will need to read the first chapter to get a grip on
things.

Looking away from the schematics, Tofu Ono finished connecting the last
circuit board with the final stabilizer. Satisfied the connection would
hold, he did a quick run through. The diagnostic system showed everything
was operational and functioning at one hundred percent efficiency.

    Awww... poor unknown electronic device. We hardly knew ye.

It has not served its one true purpose yet. Once it does, then its open
season.

him. But fascination overcame apprehension, and he continued working on

the

theories behind the shrinking until discovering exactly how the gas

worked.

He then spent all of his time, money, and energy into converting the
accessibility of Pym Particles into machine form and permanently

irradiating

his cells with it, thereby eliminating the need to walk around

continuously

with a pack of gas canisters.

    Wait... okay. The title gives it away. I should have seen it coming.
_<

Yep. Other's wanted to see the 'Attack of the 50' Kasumi' but it was not
meant to be.

There was a curious note in the papers. Henry mentioned that after his
adventures in the anthill, he considered creating a device to control

ants

instead of perfecting the machine. However the need to be able to use Pym
Particles reliably had overridden this odd desire. Tofu had to admit it

was

for the best. What could one do with an army of ants at his beck and

call?

Raid picnics?

    Pym Particles -- Pym particles (?)

Think they were capitalized since they were a specific form of particle, but
I could be wrong.

play some hoops. It suddenly occurred to him that he could substitute
Betty-chan's head for the basketball. Betty-chan was always ready to lend

a

helping body part to the cause. She was a good personal assistant that

way.

    Heh...

^_^

enough to cover her chest and bottom. Hoping it was more than just a

fluke,

Kasumi went for a larger piece of cloth. This time it was a little harder
due to the amount of material she was tearing, but it too unexpectedly

gave

way to her strength with only a minimum of resistance.

    If she retains her mass, but not her density... wouldn't she fall
through the floor?

It's not mass retention, since anyone can pick her up. However inexplicably
she retains full size strength. More comic book physics.

least not in the way it should have. As impossible as it seemed, it felt
natural, as though it had always been a part of her. The fear drifted

away

with that realization.

    Ooooo... Okay, my original guess was correct.

Yep.

Being able to look down at the world below, living a life without the
boundaries that pressed in on her at every side, was a sort of freedom

she

would bask in and never give up. She swore that as she did a cartwheel in
mid-air, never

    Whoops. Looks like something got cut off here.

Just a period.

conservative course close to the ground. All that remained of the

mysterious

wave of pain was a sort of scratchy feeling inside her head, similar to

the

leftover remnants of a hangover several hours old, just a tiny bit of
queasiness that was surely drifting away.

    skill -- skull (?) She could be psychic, I don't know. :p

Nope. It was supposed to be skull

glances in the first and second story windows of those who did not keep
their drapes closed. Some part of her knew this was wrong, but the voice

of

caution was drowned out by the newfound liberation flight had bestowed

upon

her.

    Hehehe...

Kasumi the 'naughty girl'. She mentions she's been naughty once before in
the second half of the chapter, though she got talked into it by a friend.

believe. It seemed the unexpected silence covering the neighborhood had
something to do with the inactivity of the residents in its confines.

    Boredom... in Nerima...

    The mind boggles, Mr. Sommer. The mind boggles.

Well, it's going to know that  the plague of heroes is upon them. ^_^

Instinctively Kasumi flew low, next to the wall of a building, as she
approached the corner where the sound was fast approaching. It would

provide

cover for her, even if she did not realize that was why she flew so close

to

the ground. She paused only a moment before turning the corner and was
confronted with a most unexpected scene.

    Kasumi: A cliffhanger! I never saw it coming!

Heh.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    Seriously, though, I liked it quite a bit. I'll have to read the
earlier chapters, now. :p

That will help a lot. Not as much material as you would think. Most of the
chapters are between 50-100 instead of 100+, which usually happens to me.

Thanks for the comments. They are greatly appreciated.

D.B. Sommer


	     .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'