Ignition
by Ewen "Blackbird" Cluney
Episode 3:
The Madman's Race -- Express Your True Feelings On The Road
Toasty: Kenji's toaster in girl form. Toasty is short, with
medium-length black hair. She wears a sleeveless silver shirt and
black bloomers, plus black sneakers, and has a working toaster
embedded in her back.
Kyosuke: Kenji and Kimiko's older brother, Kyosuke is a wannabe
rock star. He's been tacitly disowned by his parents, and rarely
shows up for any reason other than to mooch as a result of having
spent too much money on musical equipment. He has long (dyed) red
hair, and wears a leather jacket, tanktop, and black jeans, plus
knee-high boots. He's also rarely without his guitar.
Keiichi: A street racer and Kaoru's best friend. Keiichi is of
average height and wears a T-shirt, jeans, and a jacket.
Kaoru: A street racer; Kaoru is tall and has short, spiky hair.
He wears black jeans and a white T-shirt.
Takashi: Kaoru's nemesis -- a skilled street racer with a well-
tuned Skyline GT-R. Has shoulder-length hair and wears bluejeans
and a sweatshirt.
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[Kenji drives a bit recklessly down the street.]
Nokia: Kenji-sama...
Car: [disconcerted] <Honk...>
Kenji: When we get to the house I want you two to stay put. This
is something I have to deal with by myself.
[Cut to the Civic screeching to a halt in front of the house.
With the keyring in hand, Kenji irately strides over to the door.
As he reaches for the doorknob the door opens to reveal Kyosuke,
who immediately grins and gives Kenji a big hug. He gets a punch
to the jaw for his efforts.]
Kyosuke: [rubbing his jaw] Hmm... Not bad little bro!
Kenji: Don't give me that! What the hell are you doing here?!
Kyosuke: What? Why so hostile? Can't I drop in to visit my family
now and then?
Kenji: Usually you can't, and when you do you usually get people
to start throwing things.
Kyosuke: Well, I'm glad I can liven things up a bit. ... Say--
[snatches the keyring out of Kenji's hands] It looks like someone
got a new car!
Kenji: GIVE. THAT. BACK. NOW.
Kyosuke: [holding the remote] You know, these things have a
pretty long range; I bet I could unlock your doors from in here.
Kimiko: Um, oniisan--
[Kyosuke points the remote towards the window and presses the
button. The toaster is engulfed in a red glow. While Kyosuke is
looking on in awe, Kenji snatches the keyring back. When the glow
fades, Toasty stands there, looking confused.]
Kyosuke: Wow. You sure haven't lost your touch little bro.
Toasty: Um...
Kenji: <SIGH> I'm Asakawa Kenji; as I recall I bought you at the
department store three years ago. Name?
Toasty: I'm Toasty! ^_^
Kyosuke: Your toaster turned into a girl?
Kimiko: Oh, not just the t--MMMMRPH!
Kenji: [covering Kimiko's mouth] As usual you've already managed
to cause trouble for me.
Toasty: [dreamily] Kenji... sama...
[The doorbell rings; Kyosuke answers it to see Civiko and Nokia.]
Nokia: Is Kenji-sama in?
Kyosuke: [shock] ...
Civiko: [walking in] There he is! What's wrong?
Nokia: Look, there's another one! ^_^
Toasty: Hi! My name is Toasty. ^_^
Civiko: I'm Civiko. ^_^
Nokia: And I'm Nokia. ^_^
Kenji: [muttering] The car, then the cell phone, and now the
_toaster_.
Toasty: Does anyone want some toast?
Kimiko: Um... no thanks.
Toasty: Aw. How about some nice hot english muffins?
Kenji: ...
Toasty: [starting to get desperte] Okay... How about pop tarts?
... Waffles? ... I can do crumpets if you turn the heat down...
Or... there's these neat toaster pastries they make -- I can do
those too.
Kimiko: Um...
Toasty: Flapjacks?
Kenji: No.
Toasty: [starting to panic] Um... uh... [to Kenji,
conspiratorially] I know; you want a bagel, right?
Kenji: It's five in the afternoon and I already ate.
Toasty: But... <sniffle> But... If you don't want anything
then...
Kimiko: Kenji...
Kenji: What?
Kimiko: Do something! She's gonna--!
[Toasty starts crying.]
Toasty: WAAAAAAAAAH! All I can do is toast things and he doesn't
want ANY! What good am I? WAAAAAAAAAH!
Kenji: <sigh> Toasty--
Toasty: [sullenly] <sniffle> What?
Kenji: Look, just because I don't want any toast now doesn't mean
I don't want any at all.
Toasty: Wha...?
Kimiko: Th-that's right! Kenji ALWAYS has toast with his
breakfast! He DID buy you with his own money you know.
Toasty: R-really?
[Kenji sighs and nods. Toasty smiles and throws her arms around
Kenji.]
Toasty: I'll make it however you want, every day, forever and
ever! I can even put butter on for you now!
Kenji: <sigh> Strawberry jelly. On Fridays.
Toasty: Okay! I can hardly wait until tomorrow morning! ^_^
[Kenji frowns as Toasty rubs the top of her head against his
chest, smiling contentedly. Civiko is trying valiantly to contain
her jealousy, Nokia seems pleased, and Kyosuke is in shock.]
Kyosuke: Okay... One question -- one that usually people ask ME.
What in the blue hell is going on?
[Wipe right to everyone sitting in the living room. Civiko and
Toasty are on either side of Kenji.]
Kyosuke: ...And you weren't gonna' tell me _anything_.
Kenji: Of course not. I know better than that now.
Kyosuke: [to Kimiko] Since when did he become Captain Sarcastic?
Kimiko: Since he broke up with his girlfriend.
Kyosuke: Ah. Well, that's how it goes. Love and war and all that.
Kenji: Easy for you to say.
Kyosuke: It's really depessing to see you like this you know; you
used to have a certain something that girls liked.
Kenji: Is it that hard to understand that I don't want that right
now?
Kyosuke: It wouldn't bother me so much if you didn't have three
women throwing themselves at your feet.
Kenji: Believe me, it wasn't my idea.
Nokia: So... Kyosuke-san, what brings you here?
Kyosuke: [grins] Well, I was in the neighborhood and I thought
I'd visit my family.
Kimiko: You told me you were planning to stay for a week.
Kenji: What was it this time? An amplifier? A _microphone_?
Civiko: What do you mean?
Kenji: He usually only visits after he's spent too much money on
music stuff; we have a wannabe rock star in the family.
Kyosuke: As it happens, I'm well on my way; Mister Piss now only
needs a new bass player to be complete, and I now have _this_!
[With a flourish he opens his guitar case, donning a metallic
blue flying V guitar with a flaming skull emblazoned on it. He
immediately starts playing some chords.]
Kenji: [rolls eyes] Keep practicing. But use headphones while
you're here at least.
Kyosuke: Then I can stay?
Kenji: If I said no would it deter you in the least?
Kyosuke: Welllll... no.
Kenji: Then you can sleep in the guest room, though if you take
anything out of the fridge that guitar goes to the pawn shop to
pay for it.
Kyosuke: Can you believe this? My own little bro' is treating me
like some weirdo who just walked in off the street.
Kenji: That's because-- ... I want to say it, but it's too easy.
Nokia: Well, at least the house will be more lively. ^_^
Kimiko: That's an interesting way to put it... ^_^;
Kyosuke: Hey! Don't be so down! The K-Team is back together!
Civiko: "K-Team"?
Kyosuke: Kimiko, Kenji, and of course Kyosuke! Reunited at long
last! So! What's for dinner guys?
Kimiko: I was gonna' make some curry; looks like I'll have to
make a lot... Do the... girls need to eat?
Civiko: Hm? I still have three quarters of a tank of gas; I feel
fine.
Nokia: My battery has an 87% charge.
Toasty: I'm fine, but would you like some toast to go with the
curry?
[Silence.]
Toasty: ...nevermind...
[Wipe left to the Asakawa siblings sitting around the kitchen
table, each with a plate of curry rice. Civiko is sitting next to
Kenji, resting her head on her folded arms and watching Kenji
(she idly slides her head back and forth, rolling the steering
wheel on her head), Nokia is sitting opposite everyone else,
reading the phone book, and Toasty is trying to perch on the
counter in the spot where the toaster was.]
Kyosuke: Itadakimasu!
Kenji & Kimiko: Itadakimasu.
[Kenji and Kimiko are about to start eating, when suddenly
Kyoduke starts scarfing down the curry.]
Kimiko: Oniisan...
Kyosuke: [pauses, clenching his fist, on the verge of tears]
It's... it's... DELICIOUS!!!!!!!!!
Kenji: He hasn't changed--
Kimiko: --the slightest bit.
Kenji & Kimiko: <sigh>
[Wipe right to all of them watching TV; Civiko sits nervously
next to Kenji on the couch, Kimiko sits on the floor, Kyosuke is
lounging on the easy chair, Nokia is sitting on the floor still
reading the phonebook, and Toasty is standing behind the couch
apprehensively.]
Civiko: Um... Kenji-sama...?
Kanji: Hm?
Civiko: I... I... wanted to say...
Kenji: Wha?
Civiko: I'm... r-really sorry about before and I'll try to be
good from now on, and I was wondering if--
Toasty: Excuse me, but would you like some cinnamon toast to eat
while you watch the movie?
Kenji: <sigh> Toasty, if you want to make yourself useful at 8pm,
please try to find a way to do it that doesn't involve grilled
bread products.
Toasty: B-but...
Kenji: I'm sure you can think of something.
Toasty: O-okay.
[Toasty hurries into the kitchen.]
Kenji: [to Civiko] What were you saying?
Civiko: N-nothing! I... I should go park.
[Civiko nervously gets up and leaves.]
Kenji: Oh... kay...
Kimiko: Baka-niisan.
Kenji: Hm?
Kimiko: Oh, NOTHING!
[Cut to Civiko standing in the driveway. She wipes tears out of
her eyes.]
Civiko: Kenji-sama... Why don't you understand...?
[Civiko sits down, and slowly starts to glow red and turn back
into a car. A few moments later, a compact car pulls up and two
guys step out.]
Keiichi: Are you sure this is really a good idea?
Kaoru: What are you talking about? This is for the pride of the
Black Thunders!
Keiichi: Yeah, but... stealing a car?
Kaoru: But nothing! This is an EG6 -- exactly what I need. It
looks practically new and we're just going to borrow it for one
night!
Keiichi: <sigh> Whatever you say.
[They start advancing on the Civic. Cut to Kenji walking up the
stairs to his bed; he stops for a moment to listen. Cut to
Kyosuke standing next to Toasty in the kitchen.]
Kyosuke: It's okay; he doesn't appreciate you, but *I*
understand.
Toasty: What do you--?
[Kyosuke takes hold of Toasty's hands, leaning closer to her.
Toasty blushes.]
Kyosuke: I *love* toast.
Toasty: R-really?
Kyosuke: [leaning closer still] Oh yes. Baby.
Kenji: What exactly are you doing?
[Kyosuke blinks, and turns around to see an irate Kenji standing
there.]
Kyosuke: Little bro! You're still up? Don't you have to be out
the door early tomorrow?
Kenji: Kyosuke, I don't know what you're doing, but it looks like
you're trying to seduce my *toaster*.
Kyosuke: Well... What's so wrong about that?
Kenji: I don't even know where to begin.
Toasty: Kenji-sama... I'm *so* sorry...
Kenji: Not your fault.
Kyosuke: What's this? I thought you wanted to avoid women, and
now you're trying to protect Toasty-chan's honor?
Kenji: What are you--
Kyosuke: But if you want me to stay away from Toasty then maybe I
should go after Civiko instead.
Kenji: Kyosu--
Kyosuke: Open your eyes, my brother! Are you really so blind that
you can't see how she was looking at you?!
[Kimiko rushes into the room.]
Kimiko: Um, Kenji-niisan... Civiko was going to park outside,
right?
Kenji: Yeah...
Kimiko: Well...
[Cut to the four of them standing outside. Kenji reaches down and
picks up a scrap of paper.]
Kenji: "We needed to borrow your EG6 for the evening; it will be
returned to you by tomorrow. If you are a true car enthusiast you
will understand. Signed, Dangerous Kaoru of the Black Thunders."
[crumples up the paper and throws it on the ground] What the HELL
is going on?!
Kyosuke: [solemnly] Street racers.
Kenji: What?!
Kyosuke: The Black Thunders are a team of street racers; their
turf is in the hills east of here.
Toasty: Then Civiko...
Kyosuke: They'll try to use her for a race.
[Kenji scowls and takes off at a run. Cut to Kenji running along,
starting to tire, when Kyosuke pulls up alongside him in a beat
up old car with weird heavy metal stuff painted all over it.
Kimiko, Nokia, and Toasty are all riding in it too.]
Kyosuke: Come on little bro! We saved you a seat!
Kenji: ...
Kyosuke: Moshimoshi! I'm trying to HELP you! By the time you get
there on foot the race will probably be over with!
[Cut to Kenji sitting in Kyosuke's car as it speeds up a mountain
road. Cut to the Civic pulling up on the shoulder of the summit
of the mountain road. The headlights flicker and turn on. Keiichi
and Kaoru open the doors and step out.]
Kaoru: FINALLY the headlights turn on! What the hell's with this
car?
Civiko Voice Over: Wha... Where am I? What... WHAT HAPPENED? Oh
no! ... I've been stolen!
[Kaoru kicks the tire.]
Car: [plaintively] <honk...>
Civiko Voice Over: ow... But... Kenji-sama doesn't want me around
anyway. It's too late. Maybe these guys will be nice to me...
[Takashi walks up to Kaoru, posturing arrogantly.]
Takashi: You actually showed up early for once. Car trouble?
Kaoru: Don't be so cocky.
Takashi: You really think your EG6 can stand up to my 32? That
thing looks like you bought it yesterday! I bet it's stock!
Kaoru: I WILL win. For the pride of the Black Thunders!
[Kaoru's teammates give a collective cheer. In the distance a
pair of headlights can be seen. They all turn around to look.]
Keiichi: Who the hell could that be?
Kaoru: I don't know; the engine sounds like it's going to fall
apart any second.
[Kyosuke's car comes in fast, and does a sideways drift, coming
to a halt perpendiclar to the Civic and Takashi's Skyline GT-R,
blocking the starting line. The passenger side door swings open,
and Kenji steps out into the haze of headlights.]
Kaoru: Who the hell do you think you are?!
[Kenji strides up and punches Kaoru in the face. Kaoru falls back
against the car, and struggles for a moment to get up. Silence
reigns.]
Kenji: You're the one!
Kaoru: What the fuck are you talking about?
[Kenji reaches into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper.]
Kenji: This is MY car that you STOLE!
[Everyone around them starts murmuring.]
Takashi: Really? It's hard to believe "Dangerous Kaoru" would
stoop so low.
Kaoru: Oh, that's real RICH, coming from the guy who ran my
brother right off the ROAD in Yamanose!!!
Takashi: [shrugs] What can I say? I play to win.
Kaoru: So do I.
Kenji: Well, you aren't going to do it in MY car.
[Kenji looks around and realizes that the other Black Thunders
are assembling behind Kaoru.]
Keiichi: Um... I think you're better off just letting him do this
one race. I don't want you to get hurt.
[Kenji looks at Kaoru, then Takashi. Overlay the image of the
Civic being run off the road by the Skyline and going up in
flames.]
Kenji: NO WAY.
[The other door of Kyosuke's car opens, and Kyosuke steps out. A
hush falls over the crowd. Kyosuke walks up behind Kenji and
rests a hand on his shoulder.]
Keiichi: [awed whisper] No way... That's... Madman Kyosuke! I
thought he retired six years ago!
Kyosuke: As always, there is a third option. My little brother
Kenji can drive in the race.
[The crowd starts murmuring before.]
Crowd: No wonder they called him the Madman! Why should that brat
get involved in this? Madman Kyosuke's little brother?! But then
if he's anywhere near as good as his older brother--!
Kenji: [irritated as hell, speaking quietly to Kyosuke] Heh. They
seem to know you.
Kyosuke: You never asked me what I was into before I discovered
music.
Kenji: You really are insane. I don't know how to race.
Kyosuke: You're my brother. It's in your blood.
Kenji: Don't give me that crap.
Kyosuke: Nokia said she can still work as a phone; take her with
you and I can talk you through it.
Kenji: Absolutely not. You are insane -- unfit to function in
normal human society.
Takashi: [laughs] I like this! [to Kenji] I accept your
challenge! What's your name?
Kyosuke: You can call him........ hmmm...... KENJI THE PHANTOM!
Takashi: I'm Takashi the Demon! An unknown challenger at the last
moment! I can't wait!
Kenji: Stop this. Now.
Kyosuke: It's much too late for that. There's a street racer's
pride to consider.
Kenji: I'm not a street racer; how can I have a street racer's
pride?
Kyosuke: You don't, but the thing is that when a street racer's
pride is injured too badly they tend to get rather violent.
Kenji: When this is over, I'm going to kill you. You know that,
right?
Kyosuke: [grins] Same old Kenji. Give 'em hell.
[Cut to Kenji sitting in the car, with Nokia in the passenger
seat. Kenji pulls away the wires Kaoru and Keiichi attached
earlier and puts the key in the ignition.]
Car: <honk?>
Kenji: It's me. [rolls eyes] I can't take my eyes off you for a
minute.
Car: <Honk...>
Kenji: Help me. Help me win this stupid race and show these
jackasses who's boss.
Car: <Honk!>
Kenji: [pats the dashboard] Good girl.
[Kenji starts the engine and pulls up alongside the Skyline, and
Keiichi stands inbetween them. Cut to Kyosuke idly strumming his
guitar as he leans against the side of his car (now more sensibly
parked), with Toasty and Kimiko standing next to him. She offers
him a slice of toast, which he takes and takes a bite out of.]
Toasty: Kyosuke-san, why'd you do it this way?
Kyosuke: Kenji-kun still doesn't understand his car. Whether or
not he wins or loses isn't the real contest here; if he can see
through all the metal and plastic and come to a new
understanding, he will have won a more important victory.
Kimiko: You're being melodramatic again.
Kyosuke: [grins] I'm seeing what's really in front of me.
[Cut to Kenji looking out through the windshield. Kenji holds up
his hands to begin the count.]
Keiichi: Ten!
[Kenji puts his hands in position on the wheel.]
Keiichi: Nine!
Nokia: Are you ready?
Keiichi: Eight!
Kenji: I think so.
Keiichi: Seven!
Nokia: Just remember, we're here for you.
Keiichi: Six!
Kenji: Thanks I guess.
Keiichi: Five!
Nokia: I mean it.
Keiichi: Four!
Nokia: Civiko and I...
Keiichi: Three!
Kenji: Huh?
Keiichi: Two!
Nokia: We were--
Keiichi: One!
[Kenji puts the pedal to the metal. Both cars speed out of their
starting places, flying past Keiichi. Cut to Kyosuke; he grins.]
Kyosuke: It's begun, little bro.
[Cut to a view of the Civic through the windshield. Fade to
black.]
------------------------------------------------------------------
Ewen "Blackbird" Cluney blackbird@blackbird.nu
Blackbird's Domain http://www.blackbird.nu/
The Official Thrash Home Page http://thrash.blackbird.nu/
Knight Kevlar of the Immortal Frog Silver Knight of Mihoshi
"Be nice to me; I might just develop
psychokinetic powers and destroy Tokyo!"
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