Aaron E Nowack wrote:
On Mon, 01 Apr 2002 11:39:35 -0800 Brian Randall <brian@azurite.org>
writes:
"Are you prepared?"
Ranma: Actually, no. Can I take a rain check?
Saffron: No, but we're passing out these little Blue Reaver-symbol
books with the primary screenings!
"Yes," he whispered, as the two combatants faced one another
atop the arena that capped Phoenix Mountain.
The shadowy figure of Shang Tsung emerged from a nearby door and gestured
for the gongs to be struck. "Ranma vs. Saffron...Round 1: FIGHT!!!!!!"
Heh!
Eyes), Takada Yuuzou, and A.D.Vision (Bannou Bunka Nekomusume
Nuku-Nuku), and of course, Tatsuya Egawa (Goldenboy). The easel is
mine. That's all.
[Due to the internet have exceeded its humor quota for the day, this joke
has been randomly selected for deletion. We apologize for the
inconvenience. - The MGMT]
[Due to a conflict of interests, those responsible for responding to
C&C have been sacked. - The MGMT]
Saffron spread his wings, grinning, as the nascent red aura
about him thickened, vacillating like a candle in a stiff wind, but
building up higher with each second.
/me chews popcorn.
I can see the larger animation budget already.
Shhh! Down in front!
Ranma stood opposite him in a relaxed stance, wearing an easy
smirk. "Let's do this," he said, jerking his head at Saffron in a nod.
Saffron nodded, and inserted two quarters into the arcane, ancient
machine. "We will settle this in the way of my people... Dance Dance
Revolution!"
Dance Dance Revolutionary Girl Utena, playing the role of Sir or
Madam Not Appearing In This Fic.
Saffron returned the nod, leaning forward, and shooting across
the field of battle neatly too quickly for Herb's eyes to follow.
Herb: Man, was that attack ever neat!
"neatly" - "nearly"
Shoot. That's what you get for writing it all in one day. :p
The boy merely grinned, and vanished, to reappear behind the
emperor of the Phoenix people. "Not bad," he commented.
Saffron: Do you like fire? I'm full of it!
Ranma: Oh, you're full of it, alright.
Saffron (preening): So glad you agree.
Ranma's smile vanished, and he carefully asked, "You seem to be
losing, and yet, you are still smiling. Why is that?"
Saffron-Prime: Because I only seem to be losing.
Saffron-2: Because I'm a masochist!
Saffron-Python: *sings* Always look on the bright side of life...
*snicker*
Points for originality, evil-twin. :p
"Because I know something that you do not," Saffron explained,
crossing his arms over his chest.
"And what is that?"
"Unlike you, I've used only a _fraction_ of my true power!"
Saffron: Now, behold my unparreled ability!
Ranma: What was that?
Saffron: All rock in the vicinity has been turned into stone! Match
that!
Ranma: All bird-people in the vicinity are about to be turned into
hamburger. How's THAT work for you?
Saffron (pausing to consider): Well done, Ranma. Well done.
Ranma woke from the dream the same way he always did, but for
one significant difference.
This time, breathing hard, drenched with sweat, and staring
upward with unseeing eyes, he remembered them. Every aspect -- what had
once been hidden, suddenly made clear. And it made perfect sense, too.
Ranma: Soylent Green is made of PEOPLE!!!!!!
Chairman Kaga: But only people I don't like, which lends the treats
an undeniably savory bouquet.
With him gone, an errant breeze swept through the open window,
and the door he had not sealed, rustling a small pile of the manga --
Tenchi Muyo and Sailor Moon lying half-beneath the blanket he had tossed
aside, with the latest issue of DragonBall Z atop them.
Bravo! A classic ending! I laughed, I cried! See End of Elimination in
theters folks! You won't regret it!
You're only saying that because you sponsored it and want to cut
your losses. ;)
It was this, or 50-meter tall naked Tsunami clones and solid
white Juraian issue reavers attacking the Terrafront.
Ooh. Nifty...
*falls into deep trance*
Seemed to have the same effect on every other male I mentioned that
to....
Thanks for the feedback, evil twin!
Aaron Nowack (who realizes that by this point he probably won't be
writing an April Fool's day fic)
"Never let reality get in the way of a good hypothesis."
http://www.geocities.com/anowack/