| Venus sat stood watching the monstrosity walk away while Mars yelled at
and

sat or stood, it can't be both. Also Mars yelled at IT I assume.

| The Senshi of Fire jerked as her name was called, glaring at the man she
had

   I don't think senshi, or fire should be capitalized here. It's a
description, not a proper name as such.


   I just got the copy of the corrected version, so I will continue
my C&C from it.

--
Druid
druid@bigplanet.com

Where there is love, there is life.

"You don't need a reason to help people."
   Zidane, Final Fantasy IX




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