Much better the second time around, but I do agree with Don about the 
conversation with the Vice Principal.  I liked that conversation as well and 
think it would be better to leave it in.  Also, it would give a point of 
reference for when Ranma mentions he already knows of Akane.  Without the 
conversation, that part seems a bit off.

Once, in gym class, one of the boys had taken a wrench to the exposed
hot water valve while Ranma was showering and tried to corner her. The
fallout had not been pretty. If Nodoka hadn't threatened to publically
press charges of attempted rape, Ranma, rather than the other boy,

would

have been expelled for the beating she had doled out.

[Oddly enough, I think you should use "beating he had doled out"
rather than "the beating she doled out". The reason for this being is >that 
as written, you seem to be saying that it was Nodoka who meted out 
punishment on the pervert, which is clearly not the case. Other fixes are 
possible and you might want to consider one or two of them. >The one I 
suggested is the simplest, not necessarily the most elegant. >Welcome to 
the troublesome job of handling pronouns in a Ranma1/2 story.]

Here's another fix that's a bit more complicated, but really just a 
rearrangement:

Ranma would have been expelled for the beating she had doled out, rather 
than the other boy, if Nodoka hadn't threatened to publically press charges 
of attempted rape.

Looking forward to more.

C-Ya ='P

Jon Osborne

Never mistake motion for action.
     -Ernest Hemingway

Confidence...translates into power.
     -Trisha Yearwood


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