Since my original comments were apparently ambagious, I'll
attempt to clarify. (This should be the end of it.
I really don't have anything further to add in terms
of "Atomic Kid" and using narrative to show characterization.
IF anyone feels the need to further the discussion, please
PRIVATE E-mail. Do NOT post to the FFML)
In MY opinion ONLY:
Narrative (those parts of the story NOT dialogue) action/reaction,
tone of voice, sight, sound, taste smell, body language . . . EMOTION, all of the hundreds of little things that paint a picture of characters and situations IMPLY a characters personality traits.
In "Atomic Kid" I found the characterizations ambiguous
at best. I made specific remarks about what I perceived
as a particularly egregious error in fire-arms handling - -
NOT simply because it was an error - - but because IMO
is very sharply showed a personality trait, yet the overall
story left Ranma's personalty ambiguous. I find this
very unsatisfying.
Now, I'll try to specifically address your comments:
An Accidental Discharge (AD) is simply an accident with a firearm. Certainly the use of alcohol(or any intoxicant) significantly increases the chances of an accident. But the inference that ONLY the alcohol impaired, children or fools have AD's could be considered inaccurate. A few
minutes search on GOOGLE show a plethora of incidents among adult civilians, police and military. (Though in the military some AD's are classified as "Friendly Fire".) I've included a few minor examples at the end.
I will freely admit that my statement:
"There isn't a single person on this planet who handles firearms that hasn't had at least one accidental discharge." was not strictly accurate. It was in fact, hyperbole. BUT, I stand by the underlying theme that, with sufficient use of ANY mechanical device, the chances of an accident
will reach nearly 100% over time. Perhaps you have never had an AD. Perhaps you've never been in a automobile accident or had a grease fire in you kitchen either. The fact that you have never been involved in an event does NOT affect your chances of being involved in the future. Certainly,
alcohol, carelessness, ignorance or immaturity can greatly increase the odd of an accident. That is beyond dispute. However while training, vigilance, sobriety, etc. decrease the chances of any sort of accident, they do NOT reduce the odds to zero. And, in terms of this story, the odds of an accident are _increased_ by the overt actions of the character.
Please keep in mind, that while my specific comments address "firearms", the underlying theme of using narrative to imply/describe character traits holds true whether firearms, high steel work, mountain climbing, stock car racing , wizardry, flower arranging or anything else is involved.
There is, or should be, an underlying logic regarding a characters actions, which should reflect their personality.
Regarding "Atomic Kid" and firearms:
General firearms safety rules - -
1) ALL guns are ALWAYS loaded
2)NEVER point the muzzle at anything you are unwilling to destroy
3)NEVER touch the trigger until you are ready to discharge the weapon
4)Always know what is downrange of your target (in case of over penetration or a miss)
- - were violated in this story.
Upon first reading, I was strongly reminded of an incident involving a policeman with a shotgun, holding a suspect. The policeman had his finger on the trigger and the muzzle resting against the suspect. The policeman was 'bumped', the weapon discharged - - the resulting blast blew off the
suspects hands, destroyed his jaw and tongue, evacuated his eyeballs from the sockets and blew out his ear drums, leaving the suspect blind, deaf, unable to speak and handless. Plus some associated brain damage. His family sued the policeman and the department and won a multimillion dollar judgement. Mechanically the shotgun was determined to be in working order.
The accidental discharge was due to improper handling/tactics on the part of the officer in a manner almost exactly like that of Ranma in "Atomic Kid".
I know of NO training facility that would allow the use of a firearm in the manner shown in this story. If Akane had flinched, if Ranma had sneezed, if there had been an earth tremor . . .the pistol could have discharged, killing or at least severely injuring Akane. At that range, even if the bullet missed, in such close proximity muzzle-blast could have destroyed one side of her face or at least severely injured her eyes/ears. Training Firearms, with the look and feel of functioning weapons, but incapable of chambering a live round, are always used to prevent accidents.
In this story, Ranma acted in a criminally careless manner. As I stated in my original post, if the author is attempting to show that Ranma is:
1)Ignorant
2)Criminally careless
3)Psychopathic (that is, uncaring about anyone but himself) then this is appropriate, though IMO the characterization needed to be developed a little more.
The statements - -
"many pistols still won't fire, as they have a safety that prevents discharge unless the trigger is pulled." and "The weapon works as it's supposed to, because the trigger gets pulled with a round in the chamber."
- - may be true, especially since it's qualified with "many". However:
1) Just because the trigger is pulled, doesn't mean it wasn't an accident, as those statement seem to imply. An Accidental Discharge is ANY discharge that was NOT intended, regardless of the mechanical functioning of the weapon or any safety device. An AD simply means that the weapon
(or weapon system) was activated at a time, place or target NOT intended by the operator(s), whether or not the mechanical systems are functioning perfectly.
2)Anything built by human beings is subject to failure, no matter how remote the possibility. There are instances of firearms, fresh from the factory, discharging accidentally due to a mechanical defect. Certainly the incident is low, but the fact that the chance is remote, does not
justify pressing the muzzle of a pistol to anyone's throat on the _assumption_ it will not go off.
UNLESS the original intent is to destroy the target!
Why is this important?
1)There are a great many people on FFML (and the Internet) of all ages and levels of experience. No matter how remote the chance, I would hate for anyone to think that this scene represented safe or acceptable firearms handling procedure. (It may sound silly, but far too many people get their ideas about such things only from books, TV and movies.) It is NOT acceptable. A firearm is DEADLY FORCE! Unless you can justify the use
of deadly force, a firearm is not appropriate. Pressing the muzzle of a firearm to someone's throat needs that sort of justification. That is . . .IF you had pulled the trigger, would it have been
justified? (I hardly think so in a training session) If you can't justify use of deadly force, you have no business producing a firearm.
2)Story Telling:
In "Atomic Kid" Ranma and Akane are sparing in the doujou. To end the match Ranma produces a pistol.
>From the story - -
" . . .poke her in the throat with the barrel of a very large handgun."
Now, IMO, this is an example of using narrative to support characterization.
However, I was unsure what characterization the author intended. This single incident had the following:
1)Grossly improper use of firearm/violation of common safety rules
2)Unjustified escalation to deadly force during a practice match. (Mike Tyson only bit off an ear, after all, and look at how much trouble he got into.)
>From this alone, Ranma's characterization could be supported as:
A] Egotistical/Selfish - - flourishing or brandishing a firearm ( or other deadly weapon. A fireball or 'chi' blast in a fantasy story would be similar) simply to show off/ bolster self-esteem without regard to possible consequences. This sort of behavior is often found among young male animals (during developmental periods when their testosterone levels are highest). Among some human cultures it is sometimes associated with "fast cars" or 'dare devil' stunts or 'rites of passage' such
as single handed killing of dangerous animals.
B] Gross ignorance or mental defect: Ranma is completely unaware of what firearms can do or is too stupid to understand the consequences.
C] Psychopathic personality: Ranma, in common with Ted Bundy, Charles Manson, et al, simply does not CARE. Due to child-hood trauma, congenital defect, or some other reason, Ranma is completely uncaring of human life.
Now, from my reading of the story, I was unsure which, if ANY, of these characterizations the author intended. It was this ambiguity that bothered me.
Is Ranma a "bad guy"?
Is he an "anti hero"?
Is he a "tough guy'?
A psychopath?
Or is he simply a complete idiot?
Let me reiterate: In terms of story telling, certain actions by a character indicate certain personality traits.
For example, if a character is obsessed/repelled by 'belly buttons' to the extent that he has cut out his own belly button with a pocket knife. AND, he keeps a jar full of belly buttons he's removed from other people . . .this leads the reader to suspect this character my have some
unresolved issues. It least 'paints' a very vivid picture and leads the reader to suspect how the character will react in certain situations.
IF, a character loves fine wine, swing bands and ballroom dancing, the reader will draw certain conclusions about his or her personality.
The author should NOT arbitrarily violate these characterizations.
The character with the jar full of belly buttons, should not (without some
sort of justification) suddenly abandon taking belly buttons, under circumstances previously shown to be prime belly-button-taking conditions.
Nor should the wine lover, suddenly quaff a bottle of Thunderbird. It works
int he opposite direction. Certain actions, imply certain character traits.
These are simplistic examples, but I hope illustrative.
In "Atomic Kid" I was never able to form a picture of the characters and their personality. My comments were directed toward what I perceived as a problem in narrative and characterization.
As stated in my 'disclaimer', these are only my opinions regarding story telling. I try to provide my opinion and the reasons for my comments.
The author should disregard any suggestions s/he is uncomfortable with.
Regarding Accidental Discharges, firearms safety and tactical use of firearms, I will refer the reader or author to the following:
Accidental Discharge
NYPD/death:
http://www.villagevoice.com/issues/0122/noel.php
Civilian/ injury:
http://www.thestranger.com/2000-09-14/police_beat.html
DEA/suspect/death:
http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/081600/met_3811587.html
Police Officer/Police Officer/death:
http://www.service.com/PAW/morgue/news/1994_May_27.NOCHARGE.html
Navy/Phalanx cannon:
http://www.gulflink.osd.mil/du/du_tabf.htm
KOFOR US soldier/death of child:
http://www.hqusareur.army.mil/nurevision%20files/htmlinks/Press_Releases/2K/July/20000710-2.
htm
BOOKS:
Tactics for Criminal Patrol by Charles Remsberg
ISBN: 0-935878-12-2
Police Defensive Handgun use and Encounter Tactics by Bran A. Felter
ISBN:0-89303-798-2
Armed and Dangerous. A Writers Guide to Weapons by Michael Newton
(part of "The Howdunit Series". They also have books covering
Crime Scene Investigation, Forensic Pathology, Poisons, etc.)
The Ayoob Files: The Book by Massad Ayoob
ISBN: 0936279168
Stress Fire and Stress Fire II by Massad Ayoob
ISBN: 0-936279-03-6/ ISBN: 0-936279-11-7
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