And moving on to more C+Cing:

Excellent! Gladja did!

After a long day of being dead, meeting deceased friends,
enemies, and ancestors he had no clue about, and then literally
fighting for his life through the fiery depths of hell,

Hell,

Got it.

Darien

Shields thought a bit of relaxation was in order.

Foolish Tux-Boy. If you wanted to relax, you should have stayed dead.

Some people never learn, really.

"STAY DOWN!!!" ^_^

A few hours later, a bony finger prodded him awake. "Unnnhhh!
Quit poking my eye...quit...stop..."

Heh.

Another section adapted from another's suggestion. ^_^

AWAKEN. I AM COME.

"Not in a lemon,' Darian muttered.

You know, I tried for several minutes, but I can't quite grasp
that joke, and similar things have happened a few times before.
Oh well.

"It's completely suffocating!!!"

EXACTLY. BREATHE DEEPLY. DO YOU FEEL ASPHYXIATED YET? NO, I
CAN SEE YOU'RE NOT.

Heh. Very cute.

Yet ANOTHER adaptation. ^_^

"I'm not ready to die again just yet!"

Death started pacing around.

KIDS THESE DAYS...

Darian: What are you complaining about? My soul is thousands of years old
and I've died before. Then I was Re-In-Car-Nate-Ed. Same thing as
resurrecting. Now go away and let me sleep.

I think I can use that one.

	KIDS THESE DAYS... THEY NEVER KNOW HOW TO RESPECT AUTHORITY.
ALWAYS TRYING TO RESIST. THERE'S YOU AND, OH YES, THERE'S THIS
OBNOXIOUS KNIGHT THAT'S BEEN GIVING ME TROUBLE FOR AGES. I'LL HAVE
HIM, YOU KNOW. MAKE NO MISTAKE. IN THE END, ALL MUST ANSWER TO ME.

	"What are you complaining about?" Darien shot back. "My soul's
thousands of years old and I've died before. Then I was Re-In-Car-
Nate-Ed. Same thing as resurrecting. Now go away and let me sleep."

	EH? Death's low voice rattled the windows and broke a couple
of glasses in the kitchen. WHAT WAS THAT?

	"Um, yeah," Darien added uncertainly as he watched the shards
skid across the floor. "I said I'm alive now. I went through Hell to
get my life back and I think I've earned it, and I'd appreciate not
being killed again anytime soon--"

It works. ^_^

The receiver nearly broke when the college student slammed
it back down on the hook. "I signed up with one company and the
rest are already hounding me!"

That's the way it works. I accidentily click on one !#$% pop up on Asian
porn site, and you wouldn't believe the amount of unintelligible spam I

get.

Mind you, the picture make it clear what they're offering, but still...

Funny how the weird foreign sites have the dozens of popups and the
funky java viruses that ensure that the windows won't close, even with
specific "CTRL-ALT-DELETE" and close program instructions.

No matter what you're looking for, you're likely to stumble across
it at one point or another. Popups are EVIL. Whoever invented them
should be... Well, I can't invent a proper punishment. And I just
finished reading Dante's "Inferno."

A moment later, the phone started ringing again. Darien picked
it up and shouted, "WHAT?!"

The Imfamous Split-Screen Phone Conversation(tm) came back,
and on the other side was the familiar friendly face of Kasumi
Incognito. "Oh my! Were you sleeping?"

Darian: At some point.

Hmm...

	The Imfamous Split-Screen Phone Conversation(tm) came back,
and on the other side was the familiar friendly face of Kasumi
Incognito. "Oh my! Were you sleeping?"

	"Huh?!" Darien yelped in surprise. "Um, er, hi! Terra's mom,
right? Yes, at some point, I think, but I've already gotten up. Why
is everyone calling this early?"

It kinda works. ^_^

"I've just got an unwelcome guest," Darien replied, glaring
at Death, who shrugged, obviously not considering the remark worth
commenting upon until finally muttering a bit to himself.

NO ONE EVER INVITES ME.

Not true. There are always suicides. :P

Good point, good point...

	NO ONE EVER INVITES ME, EXCEPT DURING FINALS' WEEK AND ECONOMIC
DOWNTURNS. I AM SO UNAPPRECIATED. HERE I AM, SHUFFLING YOU OFF THE
MORTAL COIL, GETTING RID OF ALL THAT PAIN AND SUFFERING, AND ALL YOU
UNGRATEFUL MORTALS CAN'T EVEN TAKE THE TIME TO INVITE ME IN FOR TEA
AND BAGLES! WHEN AM I GOING TO BE APPRECIATED?! WHEN?! WHEN'S IT
GOING TO BE _MY_ TIME?!

Or... does it still need work?

"Are you sure there's nothing we can do for you?" Kasumi asked.

NO, IT'S TERMINAL.

Heh

^_^

IT HAS, ER, ITS PERKS, IF YOU MUST KNOW.

The horse, for one thing. Darned if I can remember it's name. Susan likes
him, though. :)

Binky! Who could forget Binky? ^_^

"Yes," Kasumi agreed with a nod, "would you care to drop by
in the morning, around seven? I could make pancakes

He should hold out for French Toast. :)

Good point. ^_^

	"Yes," Kasumi agreed with a nod, "would you care to drop by
in the morning, around seven? I could make pancakes and I'm sure
you'll have all sorts of interesting things to tell us."

	In the corner of Darien's range of vision, Death shook his
head. NO, I DOUBT YOU'LL HAVE TIME FOR THAT.

	"Or French Toast?" Terra suggested. "Mother is very good at
French Toast."

	"Uh, sure!" Darien replied in a sort of forced cheerfulness.
"I'd be glad to come over. See you in the morning."

Thanks for the suggestion. ^_^

WOULD YOU PROMISE NOT TO COME BACK AFTER THAT?

Darian: Nope. Some Necromancer might summon me. Or Usagi might bring me

back

with her Holy Grail or something.

Death: OH, THAT. I HATE THAT THING. I REALLY DO.

...

You can't come up with such a good line and expect me not to use it.

Wouldn't be propa' if I didn't. ^_^

	"Well, what?!"

	Death tilted his head at the man.

	WOULD YOU PROMISE NOT TO COME BACK AFTER THAT?

	"Nope. Some random necromancer might summon me. Or Serena
might bring me back with her Holy Grail or whatever it is she's
supposed to get later on."

	OH, THAT. THE GINZUISHOU. I HATE THAT THING. I REALLY DO. IT'S
ALMOST AS BAD AS THE DRAGONBALLS.

	"The Dragonballs?"

	Death idly waved a skeletal hand in his direction. NEVER YOU
MIND THAT. LET ME THINK ABOUT THIS.

	Darien lifted his eyes, his hopes returning at the lightening
of Death's overburdensome tone. "So, you see, I really can't
guarantee anything."

	Death snapped his fingers. It sounded like the clack of two
small billiard balls hitting each other. AHAH! I'VE GOT IT. YOU HAD
ALREADY BEEN BROUGHT BACK ONCE, CORRECT?

	"Yeah..."

	AND NOW YOU WANT ANOTHER UNINTERRUPTED CHANCE AT LIFE, YES?

	"That would be the general idea, yes."

	DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE NEED FOR YOUR EVENTUAL DEMISE?

	"Ah, not really, no."

	WELL, I DO. THEREFORE, I PROPOSE AN AGREEMENT. YOU WILL BE
ALLOWED TO LIVE, WITHOUT DYING, FOR A SORT OF LONGISH PERIOD OF
TIME WHERE YOU WILL PUT ALL YOUR AFFAIRS IN ORDER, AT WHICH POINT,
YOU WILL DIE AND STAY WHEREVER IT IS YOU GO AFTER THAT FOR ANOTHER
REASONABLE AMOUNT OF TIME.

	Darien blinked. "Sounds... fair."

	WILL YOU AGREE TO THIS?

	"Ummm..." Darien threw up his hands. "Uh, sure! I mean, I would
have lived a long, full life and everything. What more would there be
to do after that, right?"

	ARE YOU SURE?

	"Well, only if Arby's not still up there when I have to go."

	GOOD. I EXPECT YOU TO ABIDE BY THE TERMS OF THIS AGREEMENT IN
FORTY YEARS. WILL YOU?


Hmm... Think it fits, or does it need more spit n' polish?

MOST PEOPLE DON'T GET THIS SORT OF OFFER. I SUGGEST YOU TAKE
IT.

"I've had dreams and seen the future, though! I'm almost
completely convinced that I'm the Prince of the Earth, and I'm
supposed to live for thousands of years!"

YES, RATHER INCONVENIENT, THAT.

Darian: Just say 'And this too, shall pass,' and that should serve to
console you for the wait.

Could work...

	"I've had dreams and seen the future, though! I'm almost
completely convinced that I'm the Prince of the Earth, and I'm
supposed to live for thousands of years!"

	WE HAVE GOOD PSYCHIATRISTS IN THE AFTERLIFE. FREUD, IN
PARTICULAR, KNOWS A LOT ABOUT DREAMS.

	"Freud?! That guy thought using heroin was a good way to
quit smoking marijuana!"

	YES, RATHER INCONVENIENT, THAT.

	"I'm really supposed to be a prince, or a king in the future,
aren't I?"

	WELL, TECHNICALLY.

	"Good, it isn't a delusion," Darien whispered to himself
before adding, "So, I'll need a _lot_ more time than just forty
years!"

	Death raised a hand. HOLD ON. I HEAR DESTINY'S THINKING OF
TURNING IN HER RESIGNATION, SO I WOULDN'T REALLY COUNT ON IT AT THIS
POINT.

	"Hey, just say 'And this too, shall pass,' and that should
console you for the wait."

	I KNOW, I KNOW. STILL, THAT'S A BIT TOO LONG AND INSPECIFIC.
HOW ABOUT TWO HUNDRED?

Think that works...?

"I have to fulfill my Destiny! Three thousand seven hundred
years."

ONE THOUSAND YEARS AND NOT A DAY OVER.

"At least give me three thousand! The kingdom's supposed to
last forever!"

Death: NO, NOT FOREVER. THAT I CAN PERSONALLY ASSURE YOU.

Such a good line, especially in light of some "perfect"
futures that exist in some SM fanfics. ^_^

	ONE THOUSAND YEARS AND NOT A DAY OVER.

	"At least give me three thousand! The kingdom's supposed to
last forever!"

	NO, NOT FOREVER. THAT, I CAN PERSONALLY ASSURE YOU.

	"Please? I'm begging here!"

	ALL RIGHT. TWO THOUSAND AND YOU STOP YOUR SNIVELING.

^_^

AH, YES. HER. NOT LONG NOW, AND IT'LL BE ABOUT TIME. NOT EVEN
MOST GODS LIVE THAT LONG. TOO BAD, REALLY. EVEN AFTER SO LONG, SHE
WAS JUST BARELY GETTING INTERESTING.

Heh. But that won't be until the end of the series.

Oh, yes. I've got something quite fascinating planned. It sounds
silly when I explain it, but I know it'll all work out fine. =^_^=

It would take more than a thousand years and an artificial ice
age before the human race civilized itself sufficiently to the point
where they decided that mucking up the timeline wasn't just for world
heroes, villains, and Purple ArbyFish. For this reason, laws against
time travel had to be placed in order to keep Destiny from being
tampered with.

Ah, but if it can be tampered with, it's not really destiny.

Why have things like Guardians of Destiny and such?

It wasn't so much that lifestyles had degraded to the point
where everybody wanted to change them, nor was it the fact that the
people felt like rebelling against the delighfully

delightfully

Fixed it. Thanks.

In a cosmic way, Fate decided that anyone who fought against
their place in the grand scheme of things would be stopped,
preferrably in a painfully educating manner. The reason for this is
simple: if Destiny is toyed with too much, She might someday toss up
her arms, scream "Forget you all!" in frustration, and stalk away in
another direction, taking the Universe with Her.

Heh

And that's basically what happened. She'll send Urd an angry goodbye
rant via email next chapter. Just like some writers that have come
and gone. ^_^

(If anyone thinks I'm pointing at them, they're wrong. ...Besides,
if you said goodbye, what are you doing still hanging around here?
Eh? Eh?)

Certainly, he had his quirks, Sailor Pluto considered, like the
curse and a few other minor problems problems, but she was certain
she could change him, given time.

And hence the relationship is doomed for failure. Wanting to 'change' your
partner always leads to that. :)

Indeed! And people STILL fall for that old one.

Of course, Setsuna's still a bit scatter-brained from her recent ordeals
here. ^_^

Setsuna grabbed Ranma around the waist and pulled her
close. "Ranma and I are getting married!"

Mercury suddenly gasped and went pale. Her jaw fell open and
her eyes rolled back, then she clutched her chest and swooned into
the arms of her assistants. "M-married?! You and Set...su...na?"

Given they know Haruka and Michi, why is this such a shock?

Oh, no, they're not shocked because they think that sort of wedding
is going to take place.

They're shocked that Setsuna's actually getting married before
them! ^_^

wouldn't have been all that shocked!

A. Quite right. However, they were off chasing people who
weren't expecting the Senshi Inquisition.

Heheheh

Old gag hasn't died yet. Gotta milk it for all it's worth before
the universe blows up. ^_^

They actually halfway

got their introduction speech down. It went something like this:

Haruka: Nobody expects the Senshi Inquisition!
Michiru: Our three main weapons are...
Hotaru: Fear, surprise, a planet-destroying polearm, and an almost
fanatical devotion to the Queen!

If it hadn't been done before, it has been done now. I can rest in peace.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back, a long time a go, in a galaxy far, far
away, in chapter seven, there was a time...

And Zen actually let me use his avatar for that one. Ah, those were
the days! I could still surprise people back then. ^_^

"Oooh, I love your initiative! But no, we cannot. Centuries may
turn, delightfully ditzy dictatorships may raise, but bureacracy is
forever!"

True

Indeed!

"Heck no! I don't need THAT on my conscience."

I thought the Starlights changed sexes with a transformation. Wouldn't

think

that would surprise the cast either.

No, it wouldn't, really, but the timeline's gone loopy...

And they've just found out that Setsuna's getting married. Finding
out that she's actually getting married to a MAN would be even more
of a shock.

I mean, 5+ very beautiful girls/women that can't so much as get a
steady boyfriend... They'd get traumatized after a thousand years
of that. ^_^

Plus, I was in a weird mood when I sat down and found time to
write. Random plot elements to grease the wheels of creativity,
really...

Say... would you happen to have a better idea lying around that
I could use?

"That knight-guy merged with her and blew up the whole town!"
Venus cried. "It was horrible! We never recovered, and everybody
died." She paused. "Except for me. You know why?" Her shoulders
slumped. "But, but, but!!!"

Heh. Problem with temporal physics.

There has to be a breaking point for the timelines if you wind
'em too tight. ^_^

"Do you know what the 'End of the Universe' means?!?!"

IT MEANS I FINALLY GET TO RETIRE.

Only until the next Big Bang occurs. :)

Well, yes. There is that. ^_^

terminal for a nice cup of hot chocolate, the young goddess saw
something that made her spit her drink out in a fine spray all over
the screen and keyboard. Aloud, she read the words on the medium-
dark-blue screen. "General Protection Fault in TIMELINE32.DLL!?? WHO
WENT AND INSTALLED WINDOWS IN THE MAIN SERVER!?!?!?!?!!"

Isn't it always to blame?

It's not that Microsoft hasn't done a lot to spur on the development
of computing technology...

It's just that bugs are so... common in their stuff! ^_^

"Oye did!" Onto the keyboard hopped Arby the ArbyFish, who had
a little yellow halo above his head and a pair of cheesey plastic
wings strapped to his back. He grinned at the goddess, waved, and
exclaimed, "Oye'z ya new supa'voisa',

Scary, you are, Ben

I considered an introduction ceremony for Arby into the Fate
division, but I felt it'd be best if it were spontaneous. ^_^

Due to some weird protocol that had been instated a decade ago,

As a side note, that particular piece of ettiquette required
the Senshi uniform to be in the highest mode available to the wearer.
Fortunately for the temporally-displaced martial artist, she had not
discovered Super or Eternal Senshi levels, or the entire experience
would have been made all the more nerve-grinding by the addition of
more skirts, bigger ribbons, hair decorations, and, quite possibly,
fluffy, feathery wings.

True

Well, after a certain point, is it possible to elevate embarrassment
any further?

"No, do as you like there," the Queen replied, "but I just
won't let you two get married without proper wedding dresses."
She put her foot down loudly against the polished marble floor.

Of course

Much as I'd like to see 'em in wedding dresses together, I'll
leave that for someone else. That goes for the followup lemon
as well. ^_^

After staring at his computer screen nonstop for two months,
he came to an indecision. "Nah, anyone can get Ranma into a wedding
dress. I'll blow up the universe instead."

He pushed The Big, Red, Shiny "Erase History" Button.

Hehehehe.

I remember some comments made on the trailer I sent in a couple
of years ago. (My younger brother sent 'em to me while I was in
Mexico.) They still affect me. I just have to find the proper
way to apply them.

*BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!*BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!*

&&&[That, as they say, is that.]

Hope you liked it! If you did, please say so!

Cute work, but it felt like you tried to jam everything in at the end there.

Yup! I originally had the ending to be a lot longer, but it was long
enough as it was. Still, I'll be going back and revising the ENTIRE
series for a "Special Edition" (Read it again... for the first time!!!)
release of NETTG in a slightly more organized form, so hopefully it'll
all be more coherent after I fix it all up.

I STILL have to get back in the mood for writing that. Finishing up my
schoolwork would help...

Perhaps appropriate, depending on how you work the next volume. I'll look
forward to it.

Could take a while, but, like everything else, it depends what sorts of
moods I get into.

I'm _still_ thinking of making a challenge for Ranma and Setsuna in
Crystal Tokyo outtakes, but I have to come up with a proper, formal,
and coherent way to make it...

Thanks for the comments! They were helpful and I appreciate them.

----------------------
Benjamin A Oliver
boliver@U.Arizona.EDU
http://rakhal.com/florestica/ben-oliver/index.html

        "We are the Bored. Lower your shields and surrender your fics.
         We will add your standup and slapstick comedy to our own.
         Your humor will adapt to make us laugh.
         Resistance is and always has been: Futile."


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