I had some very interesting answers to the story seed I posted yesterday --
not only to my questions on etiquette, but also on the seed itself. And lo
and behold, it evolved!

The most pointed comments were on the general clunkiness of changing the
rules for one person only -- if only Ranma is truly honorable, he won't fit
in. And the way I wrote it, it did seem I went for the stereotypes.

Anyway, after reading DB Sommer's most helpful comments, (actually, him
telling me that as written, the whole thing was basically uninteresting), I
brainstormed. Apologies to Mr. Sommers, he gets this twice. There are a few
note at the end that didn't make it in his copy, though.


---------

Happosai is a really evil creep -- he poses as the panty-thief, but his
energy comes from draining women dry. Hinako is a failed attempt at making a
love-toy that he could drain as many times as he wanted - she's been chasing
him for longer than Genma and Soun have been alive. The reason he was sealed
in the cave was because Genma found him assaulting Soun's wife (sometime
after Akane's birth), though Happi doesn't know that yet, only that he was
disturbed. Genma never told Soun.

When Mrs. Tendo dies, Ranma and Akane are four. Genma knows immediately that
it's because of what Happi did, and is convinced he's coming back. So he
runs off with Ranma -- no notes, no pledge, he just vanishes in thin air to
train his successor. Of course, Genma has picked up a few seriously bad
habits from Happi, and he didn't have much common sense to begin with, and
so he turns to stealing and scamming to make his way, leading to the Ukyo
situation, and a lot of other, less serious, promises involving Ranma. No
other fianc�es, though.

In the mean time, Soun is out-depressing Ryoga, but since he lacks a
focus -- not knowing Happi is responsible -- the depression breaks him. He
cries himself to sleep for the next 10 years, and he's lost any enthusiasm
for anything. Kasumi, and later Nabiki, try to take up the slack, while
little Akane tries to cheer daddy up by learning the art, and getting him to
teach her, with moderate success.

Nodoka spends a year searching for her family, missing by one day the letter
that tells her the whole story. When she returns home, she too is fairly
broken, but she takes heart. I have no idea what else to do here.

When Ranma is nine, Genma finds the Neko-ken book, and tries it. The only
effect it has is making Ranma insanely ailurophobic -- no cat-state, no
claws, a total failure. In an honest effort to correct things, Genma visits
a temple, to get Ranma's mind patched up. In addition to mostly curing the
phobia -- he's still afraid, but paralyzingly so -- they teach him a fair
bit about honor. When they leave, Genma resumes his earlier pattern of
thievery and lies, which Ranma resents but suffers in silence.

Somewhere around this time, the Kuno family goes apeshit. I have no idea how
or why -- only that they need to be just as crazy as in canon. As the the
slapstick is eliminated, Kodachi will have to practice some other Art
(ideas), as will Ukyo (I'm thinking traditional ninjitsu -- no spatulas or
griddle-style arenas), and I have to figure out something else for the
principal.

Ranma enters a boys' school, and because of petty jealousy or some imaginary
slight, someone sics Ryoga on him by relating twisted verions of what Ranma
said concerning his directional curse. When all is said and done, Ryoga
considers Ranma his mortal enemy, and demands satisfaction. Ranma, not
knowing how serious the curse really is, accepts, and when the lost boy
hasn't shown up after three days, declares the match a forfeit, and heads
for...

...China, where Matriarch Nyu Kho Lon is doing almost the same to her great
granddaughter Nyu Shan Pu as Saotome Genma is doing to his son -- grooming
her to fight Happosai, and if she survives that, a position as Battle-leader
and maybe even Matriarch. Unlike in the Canon, Shan Pu is a real warrior --
by the time she encounters Ranma, she already knows the techniques Kho Lon
taught him and Ryoga in the Canon.

Likewise, Genma has pulled out all the stops -- sensing urgency, he's
unsealed the Secret Techniques. Ranma disapproves, but since his father is
in control, he learns them, as well as several other things that Genma
didn't like, but allowed after some convincing -- Kenjutsu, for instance. As
the trip is about to wind down, they visit Jusenkyo, with predicable
results. Ranma is not happy. There is no chase scene -- Ryoga manages to get
cursed on his own, by not watching where he's going.

At the village, Ranma is too distracted by the tournament and by conversing
with the guide to notice Genma assault the feast, and when he does, it's too
late -- Shan Pu is demanding satisfaction. Somehow or other, the whole
situation ends up with Genma being Shan Pu's bondservant, and Ranma having
to buy him -- Kho Lon insists that the pricetag includes Shan Pu carrying
Ranma's offspring. After Kho Lon extracts the reason for Ranma's training
from Genma, she decides to catch two birds with one stone -- she sends Shan
Pu along to Japan. Somewhere along the line, mutual attraction starts
forming.

Finally home, or almost, Genma drops the bomb that is the Tendo/Saotome
agreement. Ranma is not pleased -- they're almost in sight of the Dojo, he
had thought he was free to make other plans, and weren't they going _home_?
A slight, but expensive, detour is taken to make sure everyone is properly
clothed and groomed, and that a gift proper to the occasion has been
purchased. The story proper starts with the whole troop standing in front of
the Tendo-ke, waiting to be invited, while Genma complains about the rain.

Inside the house Soun is deleriously happy for the first time in forever,
and even though they don't agree with the cause, the Tendo daughters are
determined not to spoil his mood. Even so, the attitudes are pretty much
unchanged. Akane is still doing well in the morning fights, but due to
certain events in the past, it's not anger that fuels her, but panic. She's
mortally afraid of Kuno, since she _knows_ the maniac could beat her any day
of the week, and can't understand why he doesn't. Nabiki, the ice-queen, is
working 25 hours a day trying to keep the boys, and the rumormill, off
Akane's back, and keep the dojo above the redline at the same time. And
Kasumi is running on fumes -- her legendary patience is a facade, and it's
about to crack -- everyone knows it, but no one knows when or how.


-------------

With this, I've rebalanced the characters fairly severely.

Shan Pu is about as skilled as Ranma was in mid-manga -- after the Hiryuu
Shoten Ha. She's also less bimbo-like since she has no need of doing any
Ranma-chasing, and has better language skills.

Akane is almost to the level Ranma was in the first volume, but has no
confidence in her skills, as they've already failed her once. She's really
off her center, too, which hampers her.

Ryoga is a tough one -- literally and figuratively. I have a hard time
figuring out what to give him to offset the Secret Techniques, except the
Shi Shi Hokodan, so he can be a worthy rival. I'll probably have to invent
something. I also have no idea how or if I should resolve the conflict with
Ranma -- I haven't gotten that far.

Kuno is about one tenth as skilled as he boasts, and about half as skilled
as he believes, which is still a fair ways above Canon. He's also crazier
than in the canon, a regular Don Quixote, but more dangerous, to the point
of having drawn steel on a classmate for speaking to Akane. The rapidly
depleting Kuno fortune is the only thing keeping him out of the loony-bin.

Ranma is a hairy knot -- with the secret techniques, but not the Amazon
ones, he's probably just a little over Shan Pu's level. He's also got an
even worse tangle of women than in the Canon, given that his honor truly
binds him.

(The solution I see in front of me is Ranma married to a lesbian Ukyo for
honor, with Nabiki as their mistress, and Shan Pu as an adoptee of the
Saotome clan and mother of the heir through a one-time arrangement. How I'm
going to get all the way there is another story entirely...)


So. Does anyone wish to blast me for plagiarism, or have I managed to come
up with something that sounds original? :-)


SP



             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'