Losing Identity
Thom Keehn
zinyadel@hotmail.com


Exclusive rights to all Ranma1/2 characters and places belong to
Rumiko Takahashi and are used herein without permission.  This
material is not to be used for commercial gain or in any other way
that is profitable.

This is a short piece about Tsubasa, concerning what happened to him
after the whole Dating Duel mess.  It's actually a long single scene
which probably borderlines on a lime fic but I wouldn't consider
this a lemon due to the manner in which they go about doing things.

The stories of both the Cas series and Wedding Aftermaths are on my
homepage in formatted text files.

http://ravenhale.anifics.com/fiction.html

-----

<Tsubasa glides her fingers across your flat stomach, tips barely
touching the skin.>

<Ibuki moans at your gentle touch.>

Tsubasa leaned towards the computer screen, excitement running
through his veins.  In all the years he had been online, he had
never dared go so far.  Now here he was after knowing Ibuki for only
three weeks, about to take the final plunge into the cyber world.

<Tsubasa presses her lips in a ghostly kiss upon yours, slipping her
hand slowly into your panties.>

Tsubasa shakes his head, before squeezing his eyes shut and hiding
his face in his hands.  "I can't believe I'm doing this," Tsubasa
mutters to the screen.

It had been more than a year since his embarrassing defeat at
Konatsu's hands.  He had taken a huge blow to his pride, gone
against everything moral within himself, all for Ukyou's sake.  And
what hurt the most was she hadn't even give a damn.

Despite all that, he refused to let her go.  His parents had forced
him back home, a place he hated more than anything else.  They had
forced him back into the all-boys high school, a place that he had
no friends and really didn't care to find any.  Online, the world
inside, was the only place where he could find something that
resembled peace.

Overcoming the feeling of embarrassment, Tsubasa looked back to the
screen.

<Ibuki reaches up to pull you into a kiss, thrusting her hips
forward at your touch.>

Tsubasa shivered at the text.  He wanted to do this right and he had
a fairly good idea on how to do it after reading many 'stories'
online.  He knew what kind of effect he wanted: realness.   He
scorned the idea of fantasy or impossibility to seep into his dance
with Ibuki here.  To him, that would only belittle the efforts of
getting to know Ibuki thus far.

<Tsubasa parts her lips, kissing and touching her tongue against
your lips.>

He hid his face in his hands again.  'Chicken!' his thoughts
screamed at him and he could only nod in agreement.  But he felt he
had to type something to stall a little and gather his composure.
He knew Ibuki would feel worried about his idle during this personal
moment.

There was a pounding at his door, immediately dispelling his
nervousness about what he was doing.

"What?" he shouted, annoyed at the interruption.

"I'm coming in," a girl's voice declared from outside the room.  The
door opened and a short, redheaded girl stepped inside, dressed in
a green tank top and denim shorts.

Tsubasa groaned in frustration.  He wished he had the foresight to
lock the door, but things had gone a bit differently today.  Usually
he politely avoided Ibuki's advances, but for whatever reason, he
had decided to go along with it today.

Tsubasa sighed, brushing a lock of hair aside.  "What do you want,
Kiten?" he demanded.

Kiten smiled, amusement in her greenish-hazel eyes.  "Just visiting
my rival and seeing if he's had any more luck in his mailings than I
have," she returned nonchalantly.

Tsubasa shook his head.  He lacked the heart to admit that he had
not been sending love letters to Ukyou for quite some time now, nor
did he want to listen to Kiten gloating about it once he did.

Tsubasa regarded Kiten with a bit of envy.  She was not exactly any
man's dream as far as looks went.  She was small breasted, short but
curly haired and quite a tomboy too.  Still Tsubasa considered Kiten
to have an advantage over him as Ukyou didn't outright condemn
Kiten's affections.

And that was not even the end of it.  Kiten was also a student of
the Kuonji's patriarch and her parents lacked the hatred for the
Kuonji's like his mother did.  When Ukyou had given up on Ranma and
returned to Osaka, his love had even taken refuge with the Kakuheki
family instead of her own.  He knew his Ukyou would never have
considered him for a similar extension of hospitality.

In the end, Kiten and himself were still in the same boat.  Despite
Ukyou spending an entire year with Kiten and attending the same all
girl's high, Ukyou had returned to Nerima over the summer and had
opted to spend the last year of high school with Ranma.  Tsubasa did
not know all the details, but he suspected Ranma was to blame.

He regarded her, standing in the doorway in her unusual attire,
though it had more to do with her accessories than her actual
clothing.  She had a peculiar way of wearing her hair and she, for
whatever reason, had a fake human-sized cat's tail affixed to the
back of her shirt.  Her curly red hair was pulled up at the top with
two triangular clips that made it look awkwardly like cat's ears.
In all honesty, Tsubasa thought it looked quite stupid.

Kiten crossed her thin, but visibly strong arms across her chest and
cocked her head aside.  "Aren't you going to say something?" she
asked.

"Yea," Tsubasa answered.  "Get out.  I'm busy."

With that said, he turned back to the screen.

<Ibuki darts her tongue into your mouth, kissing back passionately.>

Tsubasa licked his lips absently.  'God, I wish somebody would
actually do that,' he silently prayed.

"You do realize you look terrible," Kiten commented, coming over to
his side.  "Your hair is a disaster and you're not really dressed to
go anywhere."

Tsubasa shrugged absently.  He was not planning on going anywhere,
so a faded white t-shirt and boxers with flowers and butterflies
scattered about in the design were perfectly comfortable for him.
"I'm not allowed to 'dress' up in the house according to my mother,"
he explained.  "I'm allowing her the victory for the day."

<Tsubasa kisses back, pressing against you, slipping her fingers
slowly down the folds of your sex.>

Tsubasa ears turned a shade of crimson as he typed the words and hit
enter.  "Besides, I ran out of eyeliner," he added, trying to keep
his unwanted guest's attention elsewhere.

Kiten chuckled.  "I swear you put on make-up better than I do," she
declared, resting a hand on his shoulder.  "Why don't you get
dressed or something?  It's not polite to be so unclothed around a
lady."

Tsubasa snorted, rolling his eyes.  "It's not like I wanted you to
come in," he complained.  "Why don't you go somewhere where you're
wanted for a change."

"I don't feel like being at home," Kiten returned curtly.

"Go bother your boyfriend," Tsubasa suggested.

"Fujiiro has homework.  Told me to get lost when I tried to tear him
away from it," Kiten replied amiably.

"Go vandalize something with your friends," Tsubasa ordered, running
out of ideas.

"Gyosha went with his dad on a business trip this weekend and Kosite
somehow got himself grounded.  Trust me, you're the only person I
have reason to bother right now," Kiten said with a smirk.

"What about Ken?" Tsubasa asked, turning his attention back to the
screen.

<Ibuki moans into your mouth, rising to your touch as your fingers
explore her pussy.>

Tsubasa blushed at the text.

"Ken?  I have nothing to do with that brute outside of my team,"
Kiten declared firmly.  "He's Gyosha's buddy mostly."

Tsubasa was actually a bit thankful for the distraction as it helped
him keep focus on the task at hand.

<Tsubasa rubs her fingers softly in small circles about your clit,
breaking the kiss to lower her head and kiss softly at your neck.>

Tsubasa hit the enter key and blushed at his own boldness.  'God, I
am such a pervert,' he thought.

"What the hell are you typing?" Kiten demanded, gawking at the
screen.

Tsubasa looked up, a mixture of emotions racing through him.  He
felt desire, anger, and embarrassment towards his unwanted
companion.  He latched onto the one he was most familiar with
concerning her.

"Could you please leave?  I'm trying to do something here," he
stated angrily.

"You're having sex online in English with a girl!" Kiten cried out.

Tsubasa cringed, looking nervously at the open door.  That was
definitely not something he wanted his parents hearing.

"Lower your voice and lock the door if you're going to pester me,"
Tsubasa hissed.

"And you're pretending to be a girl?!" Kiten ventured in a loud
voice.

Tsubasa got out of the chair to his desk and bolted to the door.
Slamming it shut and locking it, he prayed to all that was holy that
his parents had not overheard Kiten's outbursts.  Breathing heavily,
he turned smoldering eyes on the unwanted guest, who was now sitting
in his chair scrolling through the text of the chat.

Tsubasa strode over to the chair, gritting his teeth.  "Get away
from the keyboard and you won't get hurt," he threatened.

Kiten snorted.  "You can't hurt me, Tsubasa," she said dismissively.
"I know how to disable an unskilled opponent from about any approach
upon me and I doubt you've been taking lessons."

Tsubasa growled in annoyance.  'Why the hell does everybody I know
have to be in martial arts one way or another?' he demanded.

"Hey, she just moaned and whimpered some more," Kiten said, pointing
to the next line of text.

"Get out of my chair," he ordered, coming up to the desk.  "You are
ruining this for me."

"Oh alright," Kiten sighed, relinquishing the chair.  "It's your own
fault for not having a bigger chair or two of them in your bedroom."

Tsubasa ignored her complaints, sitting down in his chair while
Kiten flopped onto his bed lazily.  He looked at the text, trying to
recapture the moment.

<Ibuki moans, leaning her head back, pushing her sex up into your
hand.>

Tsubasa pondered over the things he should do in response to that.
He didn't want to rush things but in reality he knew sex was reputed
to be a rash and hurried act despite the best planning, or at least
that's what he had gathered from sex psychology books he had browsed
through online.

Tsubasa shook his head, silently cursing his lack of experience to
actually compare what he was typing to reality.  Slightly
frustrated, he typed something and hoped it wouldn't get him in too
much trouble.

<Tsubasa moves her head about to kiss your neck in several places,
sucking gently at the flesh while continuing her gentle motions with
her fingers.>

"Now what's wrong?" Kiten demanded from the bed.

"Nothing," Tsubasa muttered, annoyed that she wouldn't just leave.

"What exactly are you hoping to accomplish in doing this?" Kiten
asked amiably.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Tsubasa shot back angrily.

"Are you doing this just to get off, cause I don't think you'll be
doing that with me here," Kiten ventured.  "At least I hope not."

Tsubasa flushed crimson.  "I am not doing that," he declared.  "Even
if you weren't here I'm not going to do that.  I'm exploring the
feminine mind, immersing myself in it to better understand girls."

"I doubt this will help you understand Ukyou.  You know if this girl
finds out you're a guy she's going to be pissed," Kiten added.

"She won't find out.  She'll dump me long before it comes to that,"
Tsubasa stated with a bit of sadness.

"Ah, a complete setup.  You trust people not to like you so you
build up a facade to justify your lies, the facade being that nobody
cares about either you or the person you pretend to be," Kiten
remarked cheerfully.  "With that attitude, I'm not the least bit
surprised in your failings with Ukyou."

"You insult me and my art," Tsubasa seethed.  "It is not a lie.  It
is who I am."

"You are a boy, pretending to be a girl," Kiten said accusatorily.

"I don't care," Tsubasa said, stressing every word.  He turned back
to the screen.  "I'm going to learn what it is to be a girl, even if
it kills me!"

<Ibuki whimpers, whispering in your ear, "Please, stop teasing.">

Tsubasa blushed all the way to his ears, a faint sensation of
wetness in his nostril.

Kiten leaned over his shoulder, staring at the screen.  She giggled
at the text before looking down.  "And Mr. Girl, how is that
learning to be a girl?" she demanded.

Tsubasa looked down and flushed, glancing about desperately looking
for something to cover up.  He grabbed a pillow off the floor and
stuffed it in his lap.

"Would you leave?" he demanded angrily.  "You're interrupting my
studies!"

"Face it, Tsubasa," Kiten drawled in his ear.  "You're a guy and
what you're doing online is not going to help you learn anything
about real girls."

Tsubasa turned his head, his face merely inches from hers.  His eyes
were set with anger as he spoke, "Everyone online thinks I'm a girl.
Everyone.  I've sent them pictures, I've spoken in the voice rooms,
I've even got a damn calendar charted of when my time of the month
comes, which I allow to vary every now and then because I know its
not really that predictable of a thing."

"Tsubasa, that doesn't mean you understand girls," Kiten said
softly.  "You are a guy.  You will never understand girls."

"You don't believe that you are who you chose to be?" Tsubasa
demanded.  He turned abruptly and fired back a reply.  "That is the
very basis of my father's art: to become one through imitation.
Through meticulous study of all the details, I become anything I
desire."

<Tsubasa slips back up to kiss your lips, lowering his fingers down
to press two inside you.>

"Of course not," Kiten sighed.  "A man who kills can think himself a
god but that doesn't make him one.  He is a killer by everyone's
standards, standards that we need to keep order in the world."

"I have no issue with being condemned upon actions," Tsubasa
retorted, turning back to her.  "As you said, a killer kills, thus
making a choice to be a killer or in his mind a god.  But I made no
choice in being a guy.  I'm condemned for a crime I did not commit
and I'll be damned if I consent to being something I don't want to
be."

"What makes being a guy a crime?" Kiten asked with a frown.  "And
when did you not want to be a guy?  You realize the advantage you
have over me simply because you are the opposite gender?"

"I don't want to talk about that," Tsubasa declared, turning his
attention back to the computer.

<Ibuki gasps at your entry, thrusting her hips up to further impale
herself on your fingers.>

Tsubasa ogled the screen.  He glanced up to see a similar reaction
from Kiten.

"This is weird," Kiten commented, flushing.

"Nobody asked you to read it," Tsubasa grumbled.

"How well do you know this girl?" Kiten asked curiously.

"I've spoken with her about three weeks," Tsubasa admitted.  "Not
exactly one of my best friends online but she's nice and often hits
on me despite knowing I'm a girl."

"But you're not a girl," Kiten quipped.

"Shut up," Tsubasa shot back, annoyed.

<Tsubasa's fingers push in and out of you in a steady motion, her
palm pressing onto your sex firmly as she kisses you softly on the
lips, barely touching hers to yours.>

"Well, you certainly are detached from what you're typing," Kiten
noted, scratching the curled locks behind her ear nervously.

"Only because you're here," Tsubasa growled, turning on her.  "You
know how hard it is for me to type this emotional stuff with you
nagging me."

"Want me to help?" Kiten offered.

"As if you have any more experience than me," Tsubasa huffed.

"Not really, but I am a girl, you moron," Kiten drawled.  "Scoot
over."

"No, the chair can't fit two," Tsubasa declared.

Kiten pushed the chair back a little with him still in it, a
testament to her strength despite her looks.  She then took the
keyboard out of his hands and sat down on the pillow in his lap.

Tsubasa shifted uncomfortably at the added weight.  He was terribly
confused, annoyed and sickenly lusting for the girl in his lap.  "I
can't see the screen with you in the way," he complained.

"Want me to read it to you?" Kiten asked.

"No, I want you off my damn lap," Tsubasa said.

"You're just as bad as Fujiiro," Kiten noted.  "You all freak out at
the slightest touch of a girl.  That, my friend, is what makes you a
guy."

"Fine, stay in my lap then," Tsubasa huffed.  "I guess it's common
for girls to sit in other girls' laps."  Annoyed, he yanked her
stupid tail off the back of her shorts and tossed it aside.

"Hey!" Kiten protested.  "How would you like it if I just ripped off
something of yours?"

"It was making me uncomfortable!" Tsubasa shot back, annoyed.  "Just
tell me what she responded with."

"Here's what she did.  Ibuki gyrates her hips ... err nevermind,"
Kiten trailed off.  Kiten shifted in his lap a bit to the side,
exposing the screen so he could read for himself.

<Ibuki gyrates her hips, pumping faster, breathing hard.>

Tsubasa was thankful for the pillow.

"What do you want to type back?" Kiten asked.

"Give me the keyboard and I'll type it myself," Tsubasa growled.

"Don't have the guts to say it aloud?" Kiten teased.

"No, I don't," Tsubasa admitted.  "I suppose most girls talk dirty."

"Are you insinuating that I'm not a girl?" Kiten queried, leaning
back into him and arching an eyebrow.

"I am saying your actions are hardly feminine," Tsubasa stated.  "I
can pass as a girl online but if you acted online like this, I doubt
you could."

"So," Kiten said with a shrug.  "What do I care what disembodied
voices think?  I'm not the one having sex online."

Tsubasa blushed.  "The point is that they are as much a part of
society as anything else," he said confidently.  "If you are going
to say I'm a guy, the only proof you have is my body, because
everything up here is a girl."  Tsubasa tapped his temple softly.

"Tsubasa, you're losing identity here," Kiten said with a soft
smile.  "There are some things you can't change and you have to know
that.  Ukyou will never be a guy no matter how much I wish she was."

Tsubasa blinked.  "So why do you keep pursuing her then?" he asked,
confused.

Kiten rolled her eyes.  "I'm working with what I've got," she
explained.  "Ukyou is a girl.  Ok, I can't change that but does that
mean I have to stop loving her.  Not really.  I'd think you'd
understand that, seeing as what you're doing online and how much you
claim to be a girl yet are still interested in deeper relationships
with them."

Tsubasa huffed in annoyance, "How can you claim to love Ukyou when
you have a boyfriend?"

Kiten shrugged.  "My parents would freak if they knew I was
interested in Ukyou," Kiten explained.  "Fujiiro knows that our
relationship is only for appearances."

"And he's content with that?" Tsubasa balked.

"I don't know and I don't really care," Kiten said nonchalantly.  "I
told him how it was a long time ago.  If he thinks sticking around
is going to change my mind, he can think that.  I guess I should
feel bad about that, but what am I supposed to do?  I can't let my
parents know about Ukyou, and if I dumped Fujiiro they'd expect me
to date another guy for certain."

Tsubasa blinked at the screen.

<Ibuki whimpers, "Please, fuck me.">

Tsubasa blushed again, starting to really dislike the position he
was in.

"Give me the keyboard or type something.  She's probably worried I'm
disconnected or something," Tsubasa sighed.

"Let's see if she likes this," Kiten quipped mischievously.

<Tsubasa lowers her head from your neck, trailing tender kisses down
your torso.>

"You don't even know what she's wearing," Tsubasa complained.
"You're going to screw everything up."

"How can she be wearing anything?  She's a disembodied voice from
some English speaking nation," Kiten called back with a shrug.

"Imagination of course," Tsubasa explained.  "We tell each other
what we're wearing to make it more real."

"Why would you want it to be real?" Kiten snorted, amused.

"So she can get off!" Tsubasa growled, trying to reach around Kiten
and grab the keyboard.

Kiten twisted aside in his lap, keeping the keyboard out of his
reach.  "Ah, the truth comes out at last," Kiten declared.  "The
goal is for this poor person behind the screen to pleasure
themselves."

Tsubasa flushed crimson.  "Just tell me what she responded with," he
sighed.

"Ibuki's hands press your head downwards, spreading her legs wider
as she guides your mouth down to her sex," Kiten read in a flat
voice.

Tsubasa blinked.  "I can't do that.  She still has her panties on,"
he protested.

"Seems she forgot," Kiten remarked cheerfully.

"This completely blows my attempts at reality," Tsubasa complained.

"You want me to tell her that?" Kiten quipped, turning her head and
smiling.

Tsubasa sighed.  "No, just do whatever.  Maybe I can recover the
mood," he said glumly.

"The mood hasn't been lost on her, which I thought was your goal,"
Kiten remarked playfully as her fingers tapped away.

Tsubasa looked at the screen over Kiten's arm.

<Tsubasa lowers her head down, pausing at your wet>

"Um ... what do you want me to call it?" Kiten asked, her tone
betraying her embarrassed state.

"Whatever you'd call it," Tsubasa answered with a smirk.

<sex, spreading the folds with the fingers of her free hand.>

"This is so weird," Kiten said with a finality as she hit the enter
key.

"You're the one on my lap," Tsubasa pointed out.

"I meant having sex online, and in another language to boot," Kiten
commented, exasperated.  "Couldn't you at least done this with
somebody in the country?"

"I somehow don't think that would be as good an idea," Tsubasa
admitted.  "My excuses for not being able to visit are a lot
stronger if I'm out of country."

"You're such a coward," Kiten reprimanded him with a laugh.

Tsubasa shook his head and looked back to the screen.

<Ibuki presses her sex upward, eager for your tongue.>

Kiten started giggling.  "This is funny," she remarked.  "I might
try this at home sometime just for a laugh."

"Please keep serious about this," Tsubasa scolded her.  "This isn't
a joke to her or me."

"I guess so," Kiten sighed.  "If I didn't have to deal with the
awkwardness of typing back these lewd messages, I'd be rolling on
the floor by now."

"Well, give me the keyboard and roll on the floor for all I care,"
Tsubasa grunted.

"And miss my chance to go down a girl?  No way," Kiten quipped as
she tapped at the keys energetically.

<Tsubasa flicks her tongue out, dashing it against your sensitive>

"What the hell do they call it in English?" Kiten asked.

"'Clit', short for 'clitoris' I think," Tsubasa replied sagely.

"And how do you know all that?" Kiten asked with a grin.

Tsubasa flushed.  "I'm online... a lot," he weakly explained.

Kiten shrugged as she continued typing.

<clit, slipping another finger inside you.>

"I wonder if she really is pleasuring herself while doing this,"
Kiten remarked.

Tsubasa shrugged.  "It's kind of what I'm hoping," he admitted.

"Why?" Kiten asked.

"I don't know.  It would make me feel good about my performance," he
ventured.

"I'm not quite sure what she responded with," Kiten remarked,
shrugging towards the screen.

Tsubasa blinked.

<Ibuki shudders, crying out, "Oh, I'm cumming.">

Tsubasa analyzed the words again, growing more thankful for the
pillow as he guessed their meaning.

"I think she orgasmed," he admitted sheepishly.

"That's so cute," Kiten giggled.  "I thought it was a typing error."

"Type something back in response," Tsubasa ordered, slightly
annoyed.  "Afterplay is very important."

"Afterplay?" Kiten echoed, puzzled.

"You know, cuddling and stuff like that after sex," Tsubasa
explained.  "I read it somewhere that it is crucial to have that in
a sexual relationship."

"But this isn't a sexual relationship," Kiten remarked offhandedly.

"Oh, could you just pretend that it is?" Tsubasa grumbled.

Kiten shrugged, tapping away again.

<Tsubasa lifts herself up, removing her fingers before kissing you
softly on your lips.>

"Good enough?" Kiten quipped.

Tsubasa shrugged as they both watched the screen, awaiting a
response.

<"That was incredible">

"See, the moment of victory has arrived," Tsubasa declared happily.

"She could be saying that simply to placate your feelings," Kiten
offered with a smile.

"Give me the keyboard," Tsubasa demanded.  "I want to say something
back."

"No, I'll do it for you," Kiten stated firmly, typing away.

<"Thanks.  It was my first time.">

Tsubasa growled at the text.  "You are so lucky that I don't mind
you typing that," Tsubasa said with his teeth clenched.

<"Really?  That is outstanding.  Not every day I get a virgin.">

Both Kiten and Tsubasa blinked.

"Why the hell does that matter?" Kiten asked aloud.

<"Thanks... I think.">

"Don't start a fight with her," Tsubasa growled, trying to grab for
the keyboard again.

<"Do you want me to return the favor?">

"Are you in the mood to be pleasured, Tsubasa?" Kiten queried,
arching a brow as she glanced back at him, still holding the
keyboard out of his reach.

Tsubasa blushed, his mind rolling that statement over in his head to
mean something more than what she probably meant.

Kiten shrugged at his hesitance.

<"Sure.">

Almost immediately a response blinked up.

<"Tell me how badly you want it.">

Both Tsubasa and Kiten blinked.  Kiten glanced over her shoulder
questioningly at him.

Tsubasa blinked again.  "Well, she's always been a bit direct," he
commented sheepishly.

"How badly do you want it?" Kiten echoed the screen.

"Uh... just type something," Tsubasa said, flushing.  "We both know
I'm not really going to be doing anything."

<"Badly.">

"Hope that works," Kiten quipped.

<"Do you want me to fuck you, little slut?">

Blink.  "What the hell," Kiten squeaked.

"Give me that," Tsubasa said, taking advantage of Kiten's surprise
to push her off his lap.  Kiten eeped and fell unceremoniously to
the floor.  He snatched the keyboard from the floor and typed a
quick response.

<"I'm sorry.  I don't think I read that right.">

The response appeared quickly.

<"Yes or no.">

Tsubasa paused.

<"Yes.">

Kiten got back up on her knees and placed her hands up on the desk,
blocking Tsubasa's view somewhat with her head.

"She's just a bit out of it after, you know," Tsubasa offered weakly
in Ibuki's defense.

"Heaven forbid I ever do this, if it'll give me an alter ego," Kiten
remarked.

"You're pretending to date a guy while chasing my Ukyou," Tsubasa
said.  "I'd say that is an alter ego in itself."

"Shut up."

<Ibuki rolls over on top of you and kisses your lips.>

"See, completely harmless," Tsubasa declared.  "We just misread
whatever she typed."

"Tsubasa," Kiten drawled.  "I can still see what she typed and
there's no mistaking what she said."

"It slipped," Tsubasa stated.  "She's probably lost in the moment."

"The only thing lost here is your mind," Kiten muttered.

Tsubasa grimaced at her as he typed his response.

<Tsubasa kisses back, closing her eyes and focusing only on the
contact between your lips and hers.>

"Aw, that's cute," Kiten drawled.  "Have you ever kissed anyone
before?"

Tsubasa blushed, angry and embarrassed.  "No," he admitted.

"If Fujiiro kissed me like that, you know without sending his hands
out in a seek and grope mission, I would probably like him more,"
Kiten commented offhandedly.

Tsubasa snorted.  "I'll keep that in mind if I ever kiss you," he
stated cynically.

<Ibuki reaches down with a hand to spread your pussy with her
fingers, stroking your sex till its sopping wet.>

"Hey!  Where'd the hell did my clothes go?" Tsubasa protested
loudly.  "I was fully dressed when I was going down on here."

Kiten shrugged, stifling laughter.  "Maybe they went the same place
her panties went," Kiten suggested.

Tsubasa grumbled as he typed a response.  "How the hell am I
supposed to 'enjoy' this if I can't picture it?" he complained,
striking the enter key.

<Tsubasa gasps at your unexpected touch, shuddering at your
attentions.>

"I guess that's a polite way to say, 'You surprised me'," Kiten
stated giggling.  "You're being too harsh on her.  Maybe she's not
as good as you are at this."

Tsubasa sighed.  "I suppose you're right," he agreed.  "But it's my
first time and from what she said she has done this before.  She
should know a little better.  Hell, this isn't even my home
language."

<Ibuki slips her cock deep into your wet pussy, inch by inch.>

Blink.  "What does that mean?" Kiten asked embarrassed.

Tsubasa, with great effort, managed to close his jaw.  "It's slang
for a man's...." Tsubasa started, anger welling up in the pit of his
stomach.  "What the fuck is this?"

<"What are you doing?">

"Where'd the hell did she get that?" Kiten asked, perplexed.

<"Fucking you like you wanted.">

Tsubasa gritted his teeth.  "I can't believe she did that," he
muttered.

<"If I wanted that I wouldn't have gone this far with you.  How the
hell do you suddenly have THAT?">

<"I've always had this.  You said you wanted it.">

Tsubasa balled his hands into fists.  He was aware that Kiten was
watching the exchange intently.

<"But you're a girl.  You can't have one of those.">

"Didn't I make that point earlier?" Kiten remarked offhandedly.

"Shut up," Tsubasa hissed.

<"I can do whatever I want.  This isn't real.">

Tsubasa sighed.

<"I don't want it that way.  I want a girl to do me as a girl.  You
don't need to change into a boy just for me.">

<"Oh, I'm not really a girl.">

"Fuck!" Tsubasa shouted.  "I can't believe this!  That is so wrong!"

"How is it any different from what you are doing?" Kiten asked,
arching an eyebrow.

"I would never do that to another girl," Tsubasa declared.  "I
wouldn't start acting like a man.  Ever.  If I wanted to be a man,
I'd say so upfront.  Not change whenever it suited me."

"Oh, so it's better to keep up lying then," Kiten ventured.

"Yes," Tsubasa hissed angrily.  "What he did was a blatant shot at
me."

<"I'm sorry if I offended you.">

<"Like hell you are!  You used me!">

<"You liked it though.">

"What a pompous ass!" Tsubasa growled.

<"Does it sound like I like it?  You'll be lucky if I ever speak to
you again.  And mark my word, everyone I know will soon know that
Ibuki is a little boy pretending to be a girl.">

"Aren't you the hypocrite," Kiten quipped.

"I am a girl!" Tsubasa declared, stressing each word.  "As far as he
knows, I am!  Don't you find that the least bit offensive?"

"I find it ironic," Kiten commented with a wry grin.

<"I'll simply get a different name.  Too bad you're being such a
bitch about it but if you can't deal with me being sorry, too bad.
I've been online too long to let a little virgin cry me into being a
saint for defiling them when they wanted it to be done.  My
suggestion to you is to grow up and get the fuck offline if you
can't deal with it.">

The message flashed on the screen, followed by an 'Ibuki
disconnected' message.

"That bastard," Tsubasa swore.

Kiten's lips moved as she read the final tirade.  She glanced over
to him.  "He can change his name easily, can't he?" she ventured.

Tsubasa seethed because he knew it was true.  There was little else
that could be done about it now.  "Yes," he admitted.  "He'll just
do it again.  And you have the gall to say I'm a guy when that's a
guy for you."

"Not all guys are like that," Kiten commented with a shrug.

"Enough of them are," Tsubasa shot back angrily.  "I go to an all
boys' high school in case you forgot.  I know damn well how most
boys act."

Kiten crossed her arms, looking at him with an annoyed expression.
"What?  You think all girls are angels?" she demanded.  "I got news
for you, Tsubasa.  We're as diverse as the flakes in a snowstorm."
She stood up, staring down at him in the chair.  "People are people.
You can't hate a gender simply because you think there's a trend."

"Easy for you to say," Tsubasa snorted.  "You're bisexual."

The slap across his face jerked his head aside and brought stinging
tears to his eyes.  He turned back at her snarling as he got up out
of the chair and moved to slap her back.  It didn't connect.  His
forearm was caught by her hand in a viselike grip.

"That was a cheap shot coming from a transvestite," Kiten growled as
she squeezed him arm.

Tsubasa winced but restrained the urge from slapping her with his
other hand.  "I'm sorry," he squeaked.

Her grip relaxed but didn't let go.  "I know you're upset about
Ibuki but don't take it out on me," Kiten sighed.  "Ibuki is right
in a small respect that you need to be aware of what you are getting
yourself into when you let people do that to you.  True if I knew
where he lived, I'd probably kick down his door, beat him senseless,
hog tie him to my formula one car and drag him for a couple miles at
max speed, but still he had a point."

Tsubasa smiled slightly at the list, sorely wishing it would be
done.  "I guess you're right," he agreed.  "While I use the net to
try to become more like the person I want to be, others are bound to
use it to fulfill their sick and childish dreams."

"Being a girl is a childish dream of yours," Kiten stated.

Tsubasa gazed at her, eyes flaring hotly.  "Being a boy is a
nightmare no one wants me to escape," he said coldly.  "They call me
a freak.  What is worse?  Wanting to live a nightmare or trying to
escape it."

"You'll lose yourself if you try to escape it," Kiten returned.
"You'll shut everyone else out.  Maybe that is why Ukyou can't stand
to be with you.  You seem to have such a hard time standing to be
with yourself."

"I don't care if I lose myself, and sometimes, I don't even think
Ukyou is mine for the losing," he muttered, staring at her sandaled
feet.  "I have dedicated my life to becoming something else, be it a
tree, a sign or even a girl.  Why would I want to pretend to be
myself?"

Kiten cupped his chin, bringing his face up level with hers.  Her
eyes burned into him.  "You touch anything, and I'll kick your ass,"
she warned him.  She turned her head, leaning in as she brushed her
lips against his.

Tsubasa's eyes went wide as he felt her draw near.  He clenched his
hands into tight fists at his side as her breath tickled his lips.
He tried to pull his head back, but her lips were soon pressed upon
his in a profound gentleness.

Tsubasa watched her step closer towards him, feeling her lips part
as she moved her head slightly.  His palms ached as his nails bit
into them.  He parted his own lips, moving slightly to compensate
for her kissing.

All too soon, it was over.  Her lips paused and drew back less than
an inch and her eyes opened lazily to glance up at him.  "You can
breath now," she whispered, her breath hot on his wetted lips.

Tsubasa realized he hadn't breathed and quickly exhaled.  Thoughts
cried at him about how stupid she must think he was, accompanied by
other thoughts on him betraying Ukyou.  He squashed both voices
down, agreeing that maybe she thought him stupid but she still
kissed him, and objecting that Ukyou was cheating on him always
latching onto Ranma.

"Good," Kiten whispered and pressed back into him with a firmer
kiss.  Her hand slipped from his chin to caress his cheek while her
other found its way to his chest, pressing against him.

Tsubasa lifted up on his heels, nearly overbalanced as the girl
stepped in closer.  He swore he could feel blood seeping into his
nails from how tight his hands were clenched, fighting back every
urge to touch her.

There was a knock at the door.  "Tsubasa," a woman's voice called,
followed by a rattling of the doorknob.  "Tsubasa, unlock this door
right now!"

Kiten stepped away with, her eyes closed and lips turned slightly up
in a wistful grin.  "I bet that was a hell of a lot better than
kissing online," she murmured softly.

"Tsubasa!" the voice cried out from behind the door.  "It isn't
proper to lock a door with a young woman inside!"

"Fuck!" Tsubasa swore vehemently, under his breath.  "I'm having
such a lousy day."

Kiten eyes shot open, gawking at him.  "Really?  Well, see if I ever
kiss you again," she snapped with a scowl, turning on her heel.

Tsubasa swore again at his poor choice of words, watching her walk
off towards the door.  The door was unlocked and his mother strode
angrily into the room.  One look at her face told him that he was in
trouble.

"You're not even dressed for company," his mother seethed.

"I'm sorry, mother," Tsubasa apologized without the faintest hint of
sincerity.  "My dresses are all at the dry cleaners."

His mother fumed, stumbling over words.  Kiten touched his mother's
arm softly.  "It's fine, really," the redhead assured his mother.
"I don't mind."

"Well you should!" his mother spat at the girl.

"We had the door locked because we were talking about things he was
worried you'd overhear," Kiten returned, unfazed by the mother's
attack.

"It isn't proper!" his mother declared again.

"Please, Mrs. Kurenai," Kiten begged, striking Tsubasa as a bit out
of her normal character.  "I was only trying to convince him to be
more of a man."

It was Tsubasa's turn to sputter at a loss for words.  Thoughts of
how insulting and betrayal ran through his mind as the two continued
the conversation without him.

"That is kind of you, but I'd rather you not do so under locked
doors in my household," his mother said sternly.  "I've been trying
to break him of this for years now."

"He is rather difficult," Kiten agreed, turning to fix a heated gaze
at him.

"Your boyfriend called to let you know his homework was done and you
can come back over," his mother replied, finally giving him a reason
for her intrusion.

Kiten nodded, her eyes still on him.  "Yea, figures now that he
feels available it will be convenient for me to be by his side," she
remarked absently, as if the news did not matter.

His mother blinked and then shrugged, shaking her head.  "I'll never
understand your generation," his mother muttered as she made her way
out of the room and back down the hall.

There was a silence in the room after his mother's departure.
Tsubasa thought over what he wanted to say compared to what he
thought was best to say.

Kiten wandered over to her discarded tail and picked it up.  "I
guess I should be going," she declared.

"You traitor," Tsubasa muttered, the only thing he felt he could
say.

Kiten turned about abruptly, her eyes blazing.  "What did you want
me to tell her?" she asked, snarling at him.  "That I was kissing
you behind locked doors or that you were having sex online with
another man from another country."

"You could have come up with a better lie," Tsubasa declared,
seething at how easily she was putting him off.

"Look, it was really fun watching that," Kiten commented,
straightening up and crossing her arms, allowing the tail to bob
through the crook of her elbow.  "I had a blast teasing the hell out
of you, but I must attend to Fujiiro.  I'll be seeing you around."

Tsubasa stewed in his thoughts as he watched her stroll out the
door.  He unclenched his fists and lifted his palms into view to see
four crescent-shaped gashes welled with blood in each hand.  He let
out a shuddering breathe, backing up to the bed and sitting down.

Tsubasa glanced down at himself and sighed at how disgusting he
thought he looked beneath his disguise.  Memories of nakedness and a
father's soothing words intruded his thoughts.  Tsubasa swallowed
heavily, hiding his face in his palms as he let himself weep again.

-----

Kiten strikes again.  And probably strikes out as well.  I actually
wrote this immediately after Replaced but I didn't have a good setup
to put it into the series until now.  As always, I left it
open-ended so I can pick up with Tsubasa further down the road.

Comments and criticism are always welcome.

zinyadel@hotmail.com

Ciaow






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