I guess I'll make my comments short and sweet.

I'm having encoding problems with your text.  You didn't
just copy and paste the file from Word to AOL??

The whole "ore" "watashi" "atashi" thing... no good.  It'd
be interesting and maybe even funny in Japanese, but in
this chuutohanpa
　(kinda like half-assed) English-Japanese it's NG man. 
It's confusing among other things...

And you are mistaken about the uses of the various "I." 
Watashi is neutral used by all regardless of age to speak
politely.  BOku is used by young boys.  Ore is used by
teen and up males and recently a number of female use this
or Boku.  Atashi is used by some girls from teen and up. 
As such usually the young speak rough and impolite and the
elderly are very polite... but this is hard to mean due to
other changes in the culture.

I guess that is enough to get your started...

J

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Yahoo! BB is Broadband by Yahoo!
http://bb.yahoo.co.jp/


             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'