Kyhdin@aol.com wrote:
Ever since that damned Jusenkyoin had smacked him with that damn
virus, Saotome had spent half his life as a woman and as he did now
whenever he thought about them, took a moment to curse the entire
genomancers guild.
Given that it's a geno*mancer*'s guild, which sounds like it means
genetic magic, why is his gender-changing caused by a virus, rather than
a spell? Not to mention, a mere virus can't add and remove body weight;
that would have to be done by magic.
(My own opinion about the Ranma fic "The Virus" is that the funny dna
doesn't, by itself, change the victim's body, but instead activates the
parts of the brain which use magic, and programs the victim to cast a
spell on him/herself when splashed with water)
[snip]
But first, he had bisinuess to take care of
That should be spelled "business," here and throughout the fic.
[snip]
Very interesting, fun fic, which I'd like to see continued.
Some silly questions...
Why you don't set it in a culture where real horses would be used?
After all, there is magic (I think), which *usually* implies a medival
level of technology.
Ranma's "Horse" vehicle isn't described, except to say that it makes a
roaring sound when moving at high speeds, and kicks up leaves. What
kind of machine is it? It could be something as boring as a motorcycle,
or as cool as a Star Wars speeder bike.
What color is girl-Ranma's hair? Red or black? (Does his girl form
look like his opponent, Shidou?) Or does it become a random color each
time he turns into a girl, as in the fic "Ryoko Saotome?"
Where's Ryo-oki? Are they not partners in this fic? As cool a person
as Ryoko is, it would be much more plausible for Ranma to get into a
formal duel with <...>; Ryoko would want to fight then and there, and
not put it off for a specific scheduled time. (I was going to suggest
Ayeka, but she *is* after all a princess, and doesn't get into duels...
maybe Nagi?)